Our website is made possible by displaying online advertisements to our visitors.
Please consider supporting us by disabling your ad blocker.






Reading Reviews for Lucid
  
1 Reviews Found

Review #1, by lovegood27 "Lucid"

2nd April 2017:
Hello, it's me again with another requested review for you! :D

I liked the touch about Remembralls. It's just absolutely typical of the Neville Longbottom from the books we know and love. And we know he frequently misplaced things so I imagine he WOULD be quite easy to shop for :D

Charactersisation! You're definitely on point with that. The part when Ron says the salad is rabbit's food :D And Neville is definitely pretty accurate, being forgetful and not all that talkative, but still relatively collected in kind of exciting situations like the one with his parents (yes, I'll get to that eventually...) Kingsley is...well, Kingsley. I can recognise his character from some of your other stories like Into The Light I've read. Especially when he mentioned Patti. It interested me how at ease he seemed to be with Harry, Ron and Neville. I always thought of them as sort of on different levels, but I suppose that would change if they start working at the M.O.M. Oh, one thing, though. I thought it was a bit uncharacteristic of Neville to say shut up to Miriam, because he always seems so...nice to everyone, I suppose. But not the type to tell someone to shut up.

Aw, I felt really guilty when you described Neville as "the fat kid sitting on the sidelines" I guess everyone- myself included- always thought of him like that, because he was in a way. Bet it wasn't nice feeling like that, though, so I'm glad things turned out alright for him.

Lolll, I could totally see Molly telling Ron to "fatten his friend up" Just the kind of thing she would do ;D

But oh my gosh FRANK REMEMBERED! NEVILLE GOT TO PROPERLY TALK TO HIS DAD! That was so absolutely heart-warming. After being in St. Mungo's for so long, Frank finally remembered things and recognised Neville! It was so exciting! :D

You asked about plot holes and canon inaccuracies but I don't think I have any. Well, a tiny one, which I'm not even sure about (I haven't read the books in months) I think Miriam works in a different ward. At least, in OotP she was in charge of Arthur Weasley's ward, which was the one for magical related injuries. But I don't know, they might switch around often, and it's honestly so insignificant it's not worth changing. I don't think you need to worry :)

Time for some CC! I genuinely enjoyed reading this story, and there are so many great things about it. The one thing I felt was a bit off was when Frank finally escaped his insanity and remembered Neville. Neville's reactions were described perfectly with what was I felt was very sharp accuracy, but I think it just went a little quick. I think it should have taken Frank a little longer to fully come out of his head, and I imagine he would be feeling quite dazed too. Sort of related to this, I also thought he was surprisingly calm about it. But you did say he was laid back so ;)

Overall, I thought this was a lovely piece, which I really liked. Thank you for requesting! :D

~lovegood27 xx

Author's Response: I am really bad at responding to these things. You are write that the realization dawning on Frank happens really quickly. I think I was afraid of how much is too much and how much is too little? You know? Like I sometimes fear crossing that line because i don't know where to stop as a writer. I missed the mark here. Miriam could just be the name of another Healer who shared that same name; I forgot that she was the poisoned plant lady. I swear I chose that name randomly. My bad. Glad you liked it.

 Report Review
If this is your story and you wish to respond to reviews, please login