4 Reviews Found

Review #1, by marauderfan ---

20th May 2017:
Brax! I'm here for our swap! First, my apologies for any typos as I'm writing this review on my phone.

Okay but now to business: this is brilliant. The fact that it's about Tom and Merope lured me in from the start, because so few people ever write about either of them and this just seemed like such an original idea. What I was not expecting was the light-hearted, whimsical tone of this. All the hilariously serious similes in the begining about rocks! The descriptions of Mr and Mrs Ruddle and how he grabs his collarbone in a dramatic show of how upset he is, and how she goes from 100% calm to fainting and wailing about smelling salts in about 3 seconds. And despite that it's a kind of serious subject matter (I was expecting a story full of angst) it's just so much fun to read.

Despite that the story doesn't take itself too seriously, it's also not too over the top, which can be a delicate balance to strike but you did it perfectly. I also forever will imagine Mr and Mrs Riddle in the way you described them, since i had kind of a blank headcanon for them before. :p Tom's discovery that he was 'in love' with Merope was well written too, and even though it's kind of silly and seems like one of those moments in a musical when someone stands up to sing their feeligns (sidenote, why didn't Tom do that :P ) it also seemed exactly how someone would react under the influence of a love potion -they'd be acting sort of dramatically anyway. long story short this was perfect.

I can't believe I'd never read anything by you before! I'm going to be stalking your AP sometme soon :p

Omg, and then Frank and the hedgehog waiting for Merope at the end XD this was such a fun read & thanks so much for the swap!

Author's Response: Marauderfan, you write such lovely reviews! Thank you so much for the swap; I'd happily swap stories again with you any time! I'm really glad you enjoyed this story. I tried not to go overboard caricaturing the Riddles, but my headcanon for them was slightly ridiculous. I so wish I'd incorporated the sudden appearance of a fifty-piece orchestra and a song when Tom declared his love for Merope - that would have been a splendid addition!

Brax X

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Review #2, by Dirigible_Plums ---

18th March 2017:
Hello! :)

I have to admit, even though the subject matter is pretty serious, this one shot had me snorting with laughter a fair few times. You were right in saying that just one little coffee cream kickstarted decades worth of death and terror... but somehow in the middle of the one shot, you forget the weight of what is happening, too absorbed in the melodramatic responses of the Riddles to realise the magnitude of what has occurred. It is not until the last three simple statements that it hits you again.

But onto my favourite part: the RIDDLES. Absolutely loved their ridiculousness. Mr Riddle's aesthetic monocle, Mrs Riddle's dramatic cries and the way she flung her embroidery to the netherworld. His constant mangling of Cecilia's name and the collarbone! God, the collarbone cracked me up! They reminded me of stuffier, more melodramatic versions of the Dursleys almost. What characters!

(Also, unrelated but: I really like how you showed Merope's upbringing in her speech. Nicely done.)

Plums xo

Author's Response: Hello!

OMG (I LOVE your stories BTW). You are on my "most revered HPFF authors" list and you have no idea how honoured I am to receive a review from you. Like, if you were The Queen, I would probably be able to respond in a more coherent manner right now.

Okay, I'll quit fangirling around, and just say thank-you so much for your review :) I'm glad you enjoyed this one-shot.

The mangling of Cecilia's name was partly inspired by several PE teachers and my own dubious childhood. I'm glad you liked the collarbone bit. People always seem to think their heart is just under their left shoulder, for some bizarre reason.

Anyway. I'm off to do a more subtle and more age-and-circumstantially-appropriate version of a swoon now.

Brax X

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Review #3, by Flower n Prongs ---

5th March 2017:
Hello Brax!

First off, I want to say that the introduction to this story was brilliant. The analogy of a single pebble becoming a landslide that killed many and a single, love-potion infused chocolate leading to, well, Voldemort's reign of terror was great. It is very unique, but very apt. If Tom Riddle II never ate that chocolate, how different the wizarding world may have been. For even if Merope did eventually get him to marry her, any child resulting would (probably) had a better impact on the world than Tom Marvolo Riddle did.

I was expecting this story to be sort of dark and depressing since we know what happened. I was pleasantly surprised to see that you managed to get a lot of humour into it. I personally find writing humour rather difficult and have read many stories where it has fallen flat. That was certainly not the case here. It was sort of dark and twisted with a sense of doom as well as funny. Smelling salts and cappuccino squares are not naturally humorous items, but it worked here.

One tiny issue I noticed was an effect/affect misuse but that is a super easy fix.

Also, nice touch throwing Frank Bryce in. The poor man was part of such a big event at the start of Goblet of Fire that he never really understood. It was nice to see him in better shape and not about to be murdered for once.

Good luck with the Nargles! :)

Author's Response: Hello and thank you for reviewing this one-shot!
I confess; I had a lot of fun writing this for a challenge :) The brief was to include Merope and a piano. The inclusion of Merope seemed to suggest I should throw something darkly humorous together, so I'm so glad you think it comes through in this. I too find humour tricky to write!

I am utterly mortified about the affect/effect slip-up though :( I shall endeavour to hunt it down and fix it!

Thanks so much for this review :)

Brax X

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Review #4, by hedwig1751 ---

21st February 2017:
Hey :) I'm here for BvB!

I really love the way you've started it- those metaphors really relate to the theme of the story, as well as the story line- a really strong start to the fic!

It's a really good mix of drama and humour, and I like how you have acknowledged the fact that it's set ages ago, which is reflected in your use of language. Your description astounds me, especially when Tom Riddle is affected by the love potion :)

My only criticism is that maybe you should stick to using just one '!' when expressing the characters' feelings, instead of '!!!'. However, that's a really small grammatical detail, and overall, it was amazing!

Also "'Merope, let's elope,'" cracked me up so bad!


Author's Response: Hello!

Thank you for reviewing this :)

Brax X

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