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Reading Reviews for The Wolfy Pair
  
4 Reviews Found

Review #1, by crazyformario The Wolfy Pair

21st July 2015:
This was a pretty good story. I'd like to see this continue, seeing what happens now as they grow up as werewolves. And both probably feeling some sort of guilt for what happened. And seeing their relationship change as a result of being bonded in this way.

Author's Response: Thanks so much for reading and reviewing. I'm pleased you enjoyed the story. Your support is appreciated.

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Review #2, by Lily_Luna_Rose The Wolfy Pair

5th April 2015:
Pretty please make this a novel. Such an interesting idea for a story. :)

Author's Response: Hey,

Thanks for reviewing. I'm glad you liked it. I am thinking of tuning this into a novel when I have the time. Until then though it will have to wait.

xx-Wolfgirl


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Review #3, by MargaretLane The Wolfy Pair

4th March 2015:
I am really sorry about how long it took me to get to this. I hadn't realised it was that long. I was pretty busy the last couple of weeks; sorry about that.

Love the fairytale beginning to this.

This is REALLY nit-picky, and possibly just personal preference, but I think "visiting Harry Potter" might sound better than "visiting with". "Visiting with" sound a bit American or something.

Greyback?

And yes, practically the next sentence more or less confirms that, when it says he'd a habit of infecting young children.

And I like the way you connect Teddy being bitten with his father being. I was wondering how you'd pull off him being bitten without making it seem too much of a coincidence, but Greyback wanting to continue his revenge and doing it deliberately makes perfect sense, especially when Remus infiltrated the werewolves during the war.

And aw, that is so natural, Victoire not wanting to seem afraid in front of a slightly older friend.

There should be a comma before "Teddy," when Victoire says, "I think I hear someone over here, Teddy."

You describe their terror as the creature approaches really well. There's a real sense of foreboding about it.

LOVE the way Teddy tries to protect Victoire. He's a real big brother figure to her and seems more worried about her being attacked than about being attacked himself.

Yikes, they are using Killing Curses, Unforgiveables. I suppose it's understandable when somebody is attacking your child, but still, that's pretty dark stuff.

DEFINITELY think you should make this into a novel. I'd love to see how the children cope with lycanthropy. The ending seems to leave an opening for more.

Really good story.

Author's Response: Hey,

Thanks so much for reviewing for me. And thanks for your part in creating the challenge. I am going to turn this into a novel. It's just got too much potential as a head cannon not to. I really enjoyed writing this for the challenge, and thanks so much for reviewing with those edits I need to do. I'll get right on them.

xx-Ellie


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Review #4, by TreacleTart The Wolfy Pair

19th February 2015:
Hey Ellie,

So I saw your status update about this story and I couldn't resist checking out what you came up with.

I enjoyed reading this, particularly the part where the attack happens (morbid, I know) because you wrote the attack so well. I could practically hear everyone screaming and see the images in my head. I also was amused to see that it was old Fenrir who went after them. I liked how it linked Teddy to his dad.

If I have one critique for you, it's that in the beginning of the story the flow seemed a bit off. I noticed several run-on sentences that made it read a bit clunky. I think breaking some of the run-ons up a bit would make it read easier. Once the night descends on the children, the flow becomes more smooth and the plot really picks up.

As for whether to leave it at a one-shot or turn it into a novel. I think there is some excellent potential for this to be a novel. I imagine that two werewolves at Hogwarts would make for excellent reading. :)

~Kaitlin

Author's Response: Hey Kaitling,

Thanks so much for checking it out and leaving me a review. I know what you mean about the beginning being clunky. I started it out a little too like a fairy-tale telling in order to fall in with the Fairy-Tale challenge bit this was also written for. I might have to edit it and fix that part up a bit.

I'm definitely going to turn this into a novel. I can't get the plunnies to leave me alone about a Teddy/Vic fic of werewolves at Hogwarts and how they cope with it all.

Thanks again for reviewing.

xx-Ellie


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