Reading Reviews for Lionhearted
  
2 Reviews Found

Review #1, by Jayna May 2, 1998

13th March 2015:
Bravo! Awesome imagery and it all flowed together so well. The story felt very natural and I like how you worked in a lot of canon events and the story still felt very connected. Overall, I think this a splendid unique idea and it was carried out well.

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Review #2, by luvinpadfoot May 2, 1998

19th January 2015:
I'm sorry for being so late on this! But here's your review, finally. Also, you were the only person who finished a story so you automatically win! Let me know where you would like for me to leave your reviews, or I'll just start randomly leaving them. Congrats! I'm so glad this is the story that got written because I really wanted to see a Bill/Alice relationship, especially since it's possible they would have known each other.

Business out of the way, this was an absolutely beautiful story. Your writing is amazing and you've captured the moment of the Battle perfectly. I love how this whole story takes place over just a few moments, but it seems to stretch forever. I think that's very true to these types of scenes. Even though they only last a short period of time, the madness of the moment can slow it down.

You portrayed Alice's character so well, especially considering we only see her in flashbacks from a very young child. Even before she speaks, your descriptions of her are breathtaking. That first paragraph that starts with "She wasn't a particularly beautiful woman" is one of my favorites. You don't spend much time describing her, but as a reader I feel like I know her so well already.

She's so sweet with Bill, she really is. The scene with the gnomes made me sad because she would have made such a wonderful mother and she deserved the chance. I can't help but imagine what Neville would have been like if he had known her. I liked that she didn't talk down to him, even though he's just a child. She speaks in a way he'll understand, but she doesn't dumb it down.

Bill's a lovely character in this. We don't know much about him in canon, but you've taken the bit we do know and expanded it so well. Even when he's a child, I can see how he got from there to the man he is at the end of the story and in the books. That's such a hard thing to do. Often child characters are either too childish or too mature and you've written the middle ground in such a wonderful way.

I absolutely loved the way you compared Fleur to Alice at the end. It tied the story together and instead of being just a moment of remembrance, it gave it an immediate purpose. The little bit of romance between him and Fleur was striking against the rest of the story and I loved that you added it.

We don't see much of Neville in this, but I do so love when other characters appreciate how good and brave of a person he is. He really doesn't get enough credit and to see Bill make note of his bravery is such a lovely gesture. It kind of makes me wonder if perhaps Bill would have spoken to him later, once the healing process began.

I liked the title you chose and how it came directly from Alice's words. It fit the story and was so poignant. There's so much of Alice in the story and I loved this whole thing. It was a wonderful, wonderful one-shot and I'm so glad I had a chance to read it! Thank you so much for entering it in my challenge. :)

Author's Response: Ahhh I can't believe it took me so long to notice your review! Oh my goodness, you have absolutely no idea how happy it makes me that I won your challenge (even by default, haha). I really have to attribute the whole thing to you, because it all started coming together in my head as soon as I saw the pairing you assigned me; I had a bit of an 'aha' moment when I realized they probably would have crossed paths. Thank you so, so much for your wonderful prompt! As far as the rest of the reviews go, I've been pretty wrapped up in my 'Impact' fic for a while now, so I don't think I'd mind too much to hear some of your feedback on that. :)

Your review was so lovely and basically made my entire year thus far. This was my first-ever attempt at a one-shot, so I was a little nervous about it. Your challenge appealed to me, though, because I saw a fun opportunity to create a single snapshot that established an entire relationship between two people over the space of a few moments (if that makes sense).

The description of Alice, oddly enough, was probably the easiest part for me; for some reason, I'd always had that picture of her in my head. I'd also always had it in mind that Alice was a wonderful mother and had a way with children, perhaps for no other reason than that it's completely tragic given everything that transpired (and we all know how JKR loves her great tragedies). I'm so glad all of it came across to you that well!

I was concerned that Bill might come off as too precocious because I did want the reader to be able to see the connection between the boy and the man, so I'm happy that you think I was able to find a good middle ground with respect to his maturity level.

Fleur and Bill are inspiring to me; to be able to find that great love in the midst of so much darkness is beautiful, so I wanted to pay homage to that. Fleur tends to get ripped on a bit in these fics (it's pretty easy to do, really), but we often forget that she actually is a very brave woman--I thought it only fitting to tie her to Alice in that way. I'm so glad you liked the impact of that.

Neville, quite frankly, is a BAMF. I love any excuse to fit him into a story, so, again, I have you to thank for that. I like to think that Bill did speak to him later, of course. (When writing this, I couldn't help but keep thinking about that hospital scene in OOTP when Neville keeps the gum wrapper Alice gives him--it always rips my heart right out.)

Titles are generally one of the most difficult parts of any story for me, but this one just fit so well, I thought. I'm really happy (and completely flattered) that you enjoyed my story! Thank you SO much for the challenge--I couldn't have possibly written something like this without you. :)


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