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Review:Yoshi_Kitten says:
Hello there!! RoxiMalfoy, here for CTF!! I really loved this one-shot a lot. It was such a beautiful idea, to show James and Harry in two different time periods, and then have them come together at the end like that. I felt so bad for James, especially when you mentioned how he and Lily couldn't even get jobs because of the danger that hey were in. Times really were different back during the first wizarding war, and you did a really great job of capturing just HOW different those two time periods were.

The contrast between when Harry was one, as opposed to when James II turned one are like polar opposites of one another. Harry just had his mom and dad there, and they were in hiding because the world was at war. Whereas James II was surrounded by loved ones, and they had this huge celebration going on. And I think it's important to remember that it was because of James & Lilly's sacrifice, because of everything that happened during the first and second wars, that they are able to enjoy that peace. This little one-shot does a great job of reminding you of that. James and Lilly died to give Harry exactly what he has now; a life full of family and friends who love him.

As far as the format goes, I thought that it was very east to follow, and I quite liked it. I also saw in your note at the end that you asked for comments on your characterization of Harry and James I. While I cannot really comment on Harry because he wasn't really in the story much, I thought that you did James I really well here. Especially in the letter at the end. You almost had me in tears!! It was so emotional, and it was definitely something that I could see James I writing. I also LOVED the idea of event-triggered charms! I've never seen that used before like this, but it is SUCH a cool idea!! It was also very sweet, and very in character for James not to want Lilly to know that he felt so hopeless enough to write their son an “in case we die” letter. I could see him wanting to keep something like that a secret from her.

My only critique is that I wasn't very happy with the ending. I wanted MORE, which isn't necessarily a bad thing, haha!! But, as I mentioned before, I felt like we hardly got to see Harry at all. And then it ended so abruptly. I at least would have liked to see Harry's reaction to the letter. Or hear more of his thoughts after reading it… Perhaps you could go back one day and add in a little bit more of Harry's response to this surprise from his father later? If you do ever decide to write more for this; I would certainly like to come back and read it, so please let me know!! This was so sweet, and really well written. Great job!! =)


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