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Chapter 36 : What I Like About You (Everything)
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What I like about you
You really know how to dance
When you go up, down, jump around
Think about true romance, yeah
- The Romantics
"Where’s Anna?" James asked. It was one of the few moments that it was safe to chill in the Gryffindor boys’ Seventh year dorm. We were all lounging and doing our schoolwork (cough, cough.)
"Dunno," I answered. "But she was rather pissed this morning - maybe she’s gone to finish her plot against the world. We should probably sedate her."
"Oh, calm down, she’ll be fine in a week," Remus replied, his voice laced with implications.
I considered what he was trying to convey. "D’you mean . . ."
"Well, she is a girl. It’s got to happen, doesn’t it?"
"But doesn’t that mean, one week, twelve times a year, for however many years Anastasia is going to live - she could totally have a fully-working plan to destroy the world by then." I couldn’t let my mates ignore the facts.
"I’m uncomfortable with this conversation," Peter admitted, throwing his hands into the air in an odd sort of way.
"What conversation?" I’m sure that all of us got severe whiplash as Anastasia stepped in through the door and interrupted.
"The one about you, your period, and your plot to takeover the world," James said, as he lazily flipped a page in the book he was pretending to read.
"Dude!" Peter, Remus and I all yelled. I got up and whacked James.
But Anastasia didn’t get upset. Instead, she started laughing. "Well,I don’t have a plot to kill the world - haven’t since Second year.
"Now if we could stop talking about the ways in which my body betrays me, I’d be super excited." She threw her bag down against the wall and something inside made a crashing sound.
"The noises coming from that dormitory are very disturbing," Anastasia whined. She was slumped against the wall next to the door.
"Then why are we here?" I thought I should remind Anastasia that we had a perfectly good dormitory to be in that didn’t involve ten different kinds of sex. So I did.
"Because," she answered. "I’m a dumbarse and forgot my wand."
"Borrow mine, then," I offered, grabbing her wrist and dragging her away. "That’s Remus and Dora in there, and that means whatever sort of noises she’s making have been induced by a tongue.
"Ow!" I cried and grasped at the middle of my back. I turned around to see Anastasia looking short, angry, and disgusted.
"Ew! Come on, now! We don't need to be thinking of Remus that way!"
"Sorry, just stating the facts," I told her.
"I don’t care, I’m trying to uncorrupt my mind." She sat down on the couch in a huff.
The wind was knocked out of me. "Are you for serious? You, Anastasia Xanthis, be uncorrupted and non-perverted?"
Anastasia pouted, and the childish way that she curled in a ball and hugged her knees made her appear quite young. "I did a lot of thinking when I . . . went on vacation that day. This is not how I want to be. Sexual thoughts leads to sex, sex leads to kids, and kids lead to grown-ups. Sirius, I’m not ready to be a grown-up yet."
I didn’t say anything; the topic of Anastasia’s little excursion that day was strictly prohibited. We were all (especially me and Anastasia) in an unspoken agreement to not talk about it. However, before I could continue not saying any, a clap of thunder, a bolt of lighting, and a the sound of torrential downpour hit outside.
Anastasia jumped up and ran to the window, everything else forgotten. "Let’s go!" she cried.
"Where?" I yelled after her, following her across the common room, jumping over various obstacles. (Ie: couches, tables, books, people.)
I wondered where we could be going on a Friday night, at eleven o’clock. To do something fun, of course.
Anastasia showed quite a lot of endurance (endurance. hmm. . .) by not stopping once as she ran all the way down to the kitchens. She got in and out of less than a minute, carrying a huge tub of ice cream and a spoon.
"Don’t be an idiot, Anastasia! Whatever you’re going to do, think again. We haven’t got the cloak or the map, we’re bound to get caught anywhere inside this castle." I sounded too mature for even my own ears. I proceeded to slap some sense into myself.
"I never said we were going to be anywhere in the castle," she whispered, and took off towards the front doors. She quietly checked for Filch or any teachers before motioning me to follow and darting out from behind a suit of armor. She eased the door open and crept out; I shut it behind us.
We sat quietly on the steps (which were dry and covered by an awning) and Anastasia ate her ice cream. It was chocolate, and it looked awfully good. So, I stole her spoon and ate a large quantity of her ice cream in one bite.
"Give it back," she urged, trying to grab the chocolate-covered spoon from me.
"Not a chance."
"Fine." And in a truly Anastasia-like fashion, she plunged her hand into the ice cream and ate it out of her palm. "Don't worry - my hands are clean." By the time she had extracted the last bits of ice cream from the corners (five minutes later,) her face, hands and arms (up to her elbows) were covered in ice cream.
Anastasia looked up at me, and I knew, even in the dark, that I didn’t like the look in her eye. Next thing I knew, I was being jumped. Anastasia shoved her hands up my shirt, and ran the stickiness all over my stomach and back. She rubbed her face (which was also covered in sticky chocolate) all over mine.
I couldn’t take it anymore. It was sticky and ticklish. "Get off me, you sticky nutter!"
For someone as small as she, it was quite a task to throw her off. However, once I did, I got up and ran around the grounds. Anastasia might have been fast, but she was only a girl, and I was way faster. She finally stopped, and I thought that she must have given up the chase. So I walked towards Anastasia just in time to hear her say quietly, "I want it to be like this for the rest of my life. Dumbledore’s more than a hundred years old, and he’s still alive and kickin’. Why can’t I be?"
I wasn’t sure whether she was talking to me or herself, but I decided to answer anyway. "You can be."
Anastasia opened her mouth, then after a moment closed it. "You know it!
"Come on!" She took off towards the Forbidden Forest; I could barely see anything, it was all shrouded in darkness. I was taken off guard when I heard a joyful yell and the sound of splattering mud. Anastasia came sprinting back into my range of sight.
"Are you coming or not? Hello! Mud-sliding! Oh, I want to try something. Be ready with your wand in case I end up broken."
I watched in amusement and apprehensively as Anastasia backed up, then ran full speed forward. She jumped, and I was shocked out of my wits when she began to flip forward. Her feet hit the ground, but at the last second shot out from under her.
"Oww," she moaned. "My butt bone."
"What the fuck was that," I wondered in amazement.
Anastasia slowly stood up and shifted her hips a little bit. "When I was younger, I used to do a bunch of Muggle sports, and my favorite was gymnastics. I just wanted to see if I could still do it. I suppose a rainy, muddy night wasn’t the right time to try it."
I nodded thoughtfully. "Probably not."
"However," she continued, most likely not having heard anything I said, "it’s time to dance."
And Anastasia proceeded to dance, disco style. Although after half a minute or so she howled in pain and clutched her tail-bone.
"That’s what you get for being a dumbarse," I told her.
"You’re just jealous of my skills," she insisted, plopping down in the mud. Why to insane child sat in the mud, I do not know.
"You know," I began thoughtfully. "All of the girls that I’ve known have always wanted to be kissed in the rain. I must say that you’re the only one who insists on mud-sliding, dancing, attempting things you haven’t done in years, and hurting yourself."
"What can I say," Anastasia responded, in her usual playful manner. Then, she stood up, walked over to me and put her (muddy) hands on my shoulders. "But, I wouldn’t mind being kissed either."
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