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Typical Clueless Guy by PygmyPuffLover

 
Rating: MatureStory Reviews: 454
 
Chapters: 27
Words: 105249
Characters: McGonagall, Teddy, Scorpius, Albus, James (II), Lily (II), Hugo, Rose, Victoire, OC
Genre(s): Fluff, Humor, Romance
Era: Next Generation
Pairings: OC/OC, Rose/Scorpius, James/OC, Lily/OC, Other Pairing
Status: Completed
First Published: 2011.09.01
Last Published Chapter: 2013.01.07
Last Updated: 2013.01.07
Favorite Story Of: 343 users
 
Advisory: Strong Language, Strong Violence, Scenes of a Sexual Nature

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beautiful banner by !nkblot @ tda || completed || undergoing minor edits ||



 

Relationships seem so much harder when you have to battle your way out of your own stupidity to have one. And my stupidity puts up a strong fight, let me tell you.

Hugo Weasley/Vanessa McIver

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Ch. # Chapter Title Word Count Reviews Read
1 The Introduction

YES!

I've always wanted to use the phrase 'gay abandon'. Another thing to check off my things-I-want-to-do-before-I-die list.
 

3238 15
2 First Conversations

When the morning of the next day dawned bright and early, I was awoken by Molly hitting me over the head with her very heavy pillow.

What is wrong with my life?
 

3972 9
3 Psycho Girl

Did Hermione Weasley drop him on the head too often as a child?

Hmm... not likely. Rose seems fine, and she is the older child, so she would be more likely to be the victim of shoddy parenting.

Not that I doubt your parenting abilities, Mrs Weasley. I'm sure you're a fabulous mother.

3309 8
4 Study Buddies

Would you like to know why Ariadne's anger sort of makes sense?

Well, I'll tell you.

Seriously, I will. Stop begging, you're only embarrassing yourself.

3744 15
5 Food Fights

We just stood there like gorms, blinking at her and dripping from head to toe in various breakfast foods.
 

3600 9
6 The Family

I wonder why... ah well, I’ll think about it later. For now, I’m hungry.

4330 15
7 Disturbing Assumptions

Do you see what I mean? Do you? This guy hears the words 'deranged' and 'psycho' and automatically knows who it is.
 

3789 7
8 Lily's Love

They look like someone has just told them that Ariadne is moving schools and they will never have to see her vile face ever again.
 

Ooh, do you think she is?
 

Nope, nobody is throwing a party. She’s staying. Sob.
 

4386 10
9 The Kiss

Dorcas the Downtrodden... where do they come up with these names? 
 
 

4223 10
10 The Decision

Aww, how poetic. You know, other than the bit about my smudged mascara.

They don’t normally put that in poems.
 
 
 

3511 16
11 James' Visit

Not. – (I did think the ‘not’ was implied, but let’s be honest here, some of you aren’t the brightest, and may need me to advertise the sarcasm in my sentences. No offence like.)
 

3772 15
12 The Proposal

Scorpius really is one of the cutest people I have ever met. If only there was no Rose...


I DON’T MEAN THAT, I LOVE YOU ROSIE!
 

5353 16
13 Library Flirting

He had sobered up when he got hit by Daphne the Amazing Flying Shoe.
 

2897 9
14 The Breakup

I am officially the epitome of all that is cool.

Get told.
 

3569 13
15 Ariadne's Revenge

I'm such a loser.
 
 

3631 21
16 Snooze Buddies

I curse her to the fierest pits of Hades.
 
 
 

3300 18
17 Practically Stalking

I can just imagine a legion of old ladies with carpet bags and thick coats marching across the countryside like a line of mutant ninjas, waving their walking sticks in the air, and shouting that the noise needed to be turned down, because it was interrupting their cat's sleep.
 

2873 11
18 Lucky Lily

Yeah, be jealous. Stupid, ordinary nosed people.
 

4093 15
19 In Hogsmeade

When she began to hyperventilate I decided to step in.
 

5954 15
20 Scarring PDA's

Ha, try and find a comeback to that one.

"Urg." Roxanne sighed.

Good one.
 

3286 21
21 Christmas Break

"Dad will laugh at me if I come home with no toothbrush again!"
 

2281 15
22 The Revelation

I just feel like what he says means something that he's not letting on. Like it had a hidden meaning or something.
 

3068 31
23 The Dancing

Why am I best friends with this girl?
 

3976 23
24 The Hickeys

Marvellous.
 

4160 15
25 Head Spinning

Wait... what?!
 

7364 27
26 The Truth

I choked on my own spit.
 
 
 

3386 19
27 The Epilogue

The end.
 

4184 56




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