‘Plan Get Revenge On Percy:’ Ron wrote on a piece of parchment in Muggle Studies class. The teacher had bewitched a Muggle VCR and the class was watching Star Wars, but Ron, despite his like of the story, was paying no attention. Percy had snogged Hermione, and Ron would be damned if he’d let Percy get away with it. Hermione was like their sister! Damn him anyway!
1) Public humiliation
2) Tell Mum
3) Tell Fred and George
4) Tell the Ministry
5) Tell the Daily Prophet
Ron kept stewing, but nothing came to him. NOTHING. He groaned. Why couldn’t he think up some form of public humiliation for Percy? Ron was supposed to be good at this!
He collected his books and followed the crowd to dinner. That night, he sat down and wrote the twins. If anyone could think up a plan of revenge on Percy, it was Fred and George.
Dear Forge and Gred,
I need your help. I just became party to some information which indited Percy on some less than acceptable snogging of our dear adopted sister Hermione. I would like to get revenge on Percy, preferably public humiliation. Any ideas?
He sent the letter with Pig and waited impatiently for a reply to come. Heather asked him how the plan was going, but Ron said nothing. Harry and Hermione were looking a little too cozy in the corner for Ron’s liking, but he did not say anything for fear that he would leak about his knowing about Hermione and Percy. Ron slammed his book shut and went up to the dorm, falling asleep soon.
The next morning at breakfast, Pig swooped down low and dropped his letter onto Ron’s breakfast plate. Ron opened it quickly, revealing a letter in Fred’s hand writing.
What do you mean, Hermione was snogging Percy? The only Weasley she’s snogged is George last year (and I mean all of last year) but he’d kill me if he knew I told you that. Write me back and we’ll think this through. This calls for something serious.
Ron began choking on his breakfast when he read the letter. Hermione, who was next to him, patted him on the back.
“Ron, what’s the matter?” Harry asked.
Ron, ducking Hermione’s curious glance, shook his head. When his breathing returned to normal, he looked accusingly at Hermione.
“What did I do now?” She asked.
“YOU KNOW BLOODY WELL WHAT YOU’VE
DONE!” Ron bellowed out, and the hall turned to watch. They’d missed Hermione and Ron’s rows the last month.
“No, Ron, really!”
“Snogging Percy and George! What, were you snogging Percy in third year, Krum in forth and then George in fifth? Thought it a nice study break?!” Harry snatched the letter off Ron’s plate and read it through. Heather read over his shoulder and began to shake with suppressed laughter. She really knew that she should be furious, but it was just too funny.
“What are you talking about, Ron?” A gasp had gone up and Percy was hurrying his way over to the Gryffindor table, looking furious.
“I’m talking about the fact that you’ve snogged two of my brothers and that Bulgarian git!”
“You are the only git I see at the moment!” Hermione shouted back. By then, Harry had noticed his sister shaking with laughter and leaned in to have her whisper in his ear what was going on.
“Harry, Hermione told me that she’d snogged a Weasley. She didn’t tell me which. It must have been George, because she said she got her first snog fifth year. When I told Ron that he assumed she had snogged Percy, and then he thought of this plan called “get Percy” and he wrote to the twins for advise, and now Fred is confused and Ron’s all mixed up and Percy’s going to kill him.”
Harry, too, began to laugh. Percy had arrived and was looking murderous. “What is going on?”
“You tell me! You’re the one who was snogging Hermione the year you were Head Boy. No wonder she always got along with you the best!”
“What are you talking about?!” Percy sounded ready to murder someone. The entire Great Hall was watching at this point.
“What is so funny?” Ron snapped at Harry and Heather.
“Ron, you are confused!” Heather said. “When Hermione told me she’d snogged a Weasley, she never said which one. When you said Percy, I trusted your judgement because I don’t know any of them. But now I see that it was George, and only George, since Hermione got her first kiss her fifth year. So Krum’s out too.”
Ron was blushing to match his hair. Without another word, he turned and fled the Great Hall. Heather took off after him while the Great Hall returned to its normal volume. Professor Dumbledore looked amused. He’d discovered Hermione and George in the Owlery that morning, but had said nothing.
Not fifteen seconds after Ron fled, a Howler dropped at Percy’s feet. Percy, being a Hogwarts teacher, dashed for the door, but the Howler opened before he got there.
“PERCIVAL WEASLEY! YOU ARE A HOGWARTS TEACHER! YOU WERE A HOGWARTS HEAD BOY! YOU ARE BY FAR ONE OF THE BRIGHTEST STARS OF YOUR YEAR! NO MATTER HOW THICK HEADED YOU MAY BE, I NEVER WOULD HAVE THOUGHT THAT YOU WOULD RESORT TO SNOGGING HERMIONE! I AM ASHAMED OF YOU!”
Molly Weasley’s voice hung in the air like a cloud, and Percy disappeared. Dumbledore stood and motioned for silence. “The events of this morning will not be brought up again. If I catch any one of you talking about this within Professor Weasley’s earshot, you will be expelled.”
As Dumbledore sat, Hermione buried her head in her arms. Harry attempted to consol her, but could not. Hermione was not in class any of that day, and Ron and Heather were no where to be found....
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