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I Can't Die Now by GraceWeasley
Chapter 2 : The Calm
Rating: MatureChapter Reviews: 1

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“Oh shit! She’s awake!” Said a voice, making my head feel like it was about to explode. I let

out a gasp as my hands flew to my head, cradling it, my eyes were firmly shut.

“Stop, stop, stop, stop, stop, stop…” I muttered soothingly to myself, giving myself

something to hold on to.

“What are you saying?” Came the pounding words again. I gasped in pain, gritting my teeth

and burying my fingers in to my hair.

“Stop, stop, stop, stop, stop...” I whispered pleadingly.

“Stop… Talking?” They asked loudly. I couldn’t nod, it hurt my head too much.

“Stop talking, stop talking…” I whimpered.

“Oh… Okay.” They whispered.

I felt myself drift off again, no more pain. Peace.

I can’t die now.

That was all I could see, all my dreams had the flaming words that were etched into my

mind. Why? Why not die? I had done what I needed to do. I could let go now. I could let go.

I didn’t realize that I had opened my eyes until the fire was gone. It was replaced by light. I

didn’t know which was worse. I closed my eyes tightly. I didn’t want to wake up. I wanted to

sleep. I wanted to be free. But I couldn’t fall back asleep. I slowly opened my eyes, letting

them adjust. I looked around, sitting up with a gasp. My muscles felt tense.

I was in a hospital room.

I can’t die now.

Though, it didn’t sound bad at the moment.

“Oh! Welcome back Miss Hale!” Said a plump nurse as she bustled in, carrying multiple

things on a tray. I watched her put her tray next to me. She had blonde hair and a sweet


“Now dear, how are you feeling?” She asked kindly.

“Good.” My voice was hoarse.

“Here! I’ve got some water right here…” She handed me a glass. I shakily held it, my arms

were weak, and drank it gratefully.

“Now, do you have any nausea, headaches, anything at all?” She asked, busying herself

with the items on the tray.

“A bit lightheaded, but that’s it.” I said uncertainly, watching as she grabbed a pink vial.

“That’s to be expected dear! Nothing to worry about!” She said, smiling sincerely. I felt a

twinge of annoyance at how cheerful this nurse was.

“Now, you’re in St. Mungo’s hospital, and have been for the past week. You nearly died, your

left lung was pierced by a curse, and people found you only a few minutes before you

would have…” She continued on. “You are perfectly healed now, and I will have to warn you

that the media has gone into quite the uproar since you killed Delphini Riddle.” She smiled

coyly. “I give you my most sincere congratulations.” She rushed on.

“Anyways, as I was saying, I haven’t seen such an upheaval since He-who-must-not-be-

named was killed!” She said, grabbing a vile.

“You will be released in a day’s time, we will do some tests to see if everything’s running

properly. Please drink all these…” She said, handing me the pink vile. I downed it without

flinching. It tasted horrid. I grimaced, making the nurse laugh.

“So where will you be going now, Miss Hale?” She asked cheerfully. I shrugged.

“Off to get the rest of the Death-Eaters back in Azkaban.” I said absentmindedly. I noticed

her apprehensive look, and conveniently ignored it.

“Well, an Auror will be coming in to speak to you today about some things, is that all right

dear?” She asked. I nodded slowly, though it really wasn't okay. After the last time they'd

captured me, I was sure there was some bad blood. She clapped her hands together.

“All right then, off I go!” She said with a wave, and disappeared from my room.

Only minutes later my head felt like dying from boredom.

This would be a long day.

“Ah, Miss Hale.” Said—Harry. My heart panged, he wasn’t even calling me by my real name

anymore. I looked at Auror Potter skeptically.

“How’s Freddy?” I asked, feeling my heart swell, just by thinking of my best friend. Maybe

he didn’t want to be best friends anymore though. Harry remained silent.

“Um, yes?” I asked politely, despite not wanting anything to do with any Aurors, especially

the Head-Auror himself. But, knowing Harry from before my parents’ deaths, it made it


“I’ve come to discuss your arrangement upon your release from St. Mungo’s. As your

parents are…” He said it so professionally. I resented thinking of when we used to play

Quidditch together—Just Freddy, Harry and I, when everyone else was too tired to keep


“Dead. I won’t cry about it. Go on, say it.” I said hollowly, not wanting to be sad about it, not

wanting to think about Freddy either.

“Dead.” He hissed as if it pained him. I nodded smugly, he’s right to squirm.

“And you have no relatives that are suitable to take you in…” I knew where this was going. I

responded heatedly.

“There’s no way in hell I’m being adopted. If that’s the case here, go shove your—”

“I never said that, and all of us at the Ministry know you would never stand for such

things… You are too… strong-willed.” Auror Potter said with a shrug. I smirked at him and

leaned back comfortably.

“But, it is obligatory that you attend your fifth year at Hogwarts. Despite having missed the

past two years, we are confident you will not need to do third and fourth year classes and

that you will catch up, am I correct?” Auror Potter asked. I nodded.

“Of course—Wait. There’s no way I’m going to bloody Hogwarts! I’m going to get the rest of

them in Azkaban, or better yet, I’ll kill them!” I said desperately. He had to understand. I

needed them all dead. They couldn’t get away with what they had done to my parents. I

would find them, and kill them. I sound like a bloody psychopath. Then again, maybe I am


“It is obligatory—”

“Make me, Potter.” I hissed, glaring at him. Auror Potter sighed.

“We don’t want to force you… But if we have to we will.”

“I’ll wreak havoc on Hogwarts, Headmistress McGonagall would never forgive you.” I


“Headmistress McGonagall’s perfectly capable of handling herself.” He said confidently. I

deflated, knowing he had won.

“Once I get out of Hogwarts, I’ll kill them all. If you don’t put me in Hogwarts, I’ll leave them

alone if necessary—” I tried to bargain, knowing I was lying.

“If you kill them, you’ll go to Azkaban.” Harry said confidently.

“And I’ll enjoy every minute of it, so long as they’re all rotting in Hell.”

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