Chapter 16 : A constructive discussion free from the prejudice and misconception fostered by secrecy
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“WHAT?” Uncle Ron was the first to break the silence, turning a shade of red around the ears that clashed horribly with his hair, “YOU DID WHAT?”
I quickly spoke up, “and by that she means frisson in its original meaning, as in, had romantic feelings for, not the weird sexual thing James interpreted it as.”
The redness around his ears lessened slightly now that he knew his daughter wasn’t being a sexual deviant with the son of his worst enemy.
James however, was less comforted.
“WHAT?” He bellowed at me, “YOU KNEW?”
At this point Aunt Hermione stood up and shooed all of us out into the garden leaving only Rose in the room with the adults.
My protestations that she should be allowed to have legal council present were summarily ignored.
“You knew?” Repeated James furiously, “And you didn’t tell me?”
“I couldn’t!” I insisted, “Rose swore me to secrecy!”
“Is this what that whole fight was about?” Demanded Lily.
I nodded miserably.
“AND YOU BLOODY WELL DIDN’T THINK THIS WAS WORTH MENTIONING WHEN WE LAST SPOKE?” James was still apparently having an embolism.
Hugo, ignoring all of us, strode purposefully towards the garden shed.
“Ummm” asked Roxie looking baffled, “Where are you going?”
“To get my bat,” he said flatly.
Freddy, who had marched into the garden, suddenly dropped Lucy who he appeared to have forgotten he was still smothering. As she gulped in air on the grass he too strode over to the shed.
“I’ll get the snitch,” said James grimly.
I sighed, “James, you do know they’re not actually having a Quidditch match right?”
“I know, but there are places you can stick a snitch that would mean he won’t be frissoning any of my cousins for a very long time.”
“Why didn’t Vic or Molly or Teddy get thrown out here?” demanded Lily petulantly, “how come they get to know what’s going on?”
“Probably because they weren’t swearing vengeance using sporting equipment,” suggested Lucy as she picked herself up off the grass.
“I’m not swearing vengeance!” Lily continued to pout, “I think forbidden love is romantic...”
James dropped the snitch box and spun around, “IT’S BLOODY WELL NOT ROMANTIC! HE’S A FUCKING EVIL DEVIANT WANKER!”
“What I want to know!” objected Albus, who had apparently only just managed to snap out of his astonishment at Rose’s revelation, “Is why she didn’t tell me?”
Lucy and I both snorted, “You’re kidding right?”
“No!” said Al indignantly, “Why would she hide it unless she was ashamed?”
Roxie rolled her eyes, “I’m so sorry, did you miss the way James, Freddy, Hugo and Uncle Ron all reacted?”
“His dad was a death eater!” said Hugo, twirling his bat menacingly.
I rolled my eyes, “And your mum is a genius but you’re a moron, not everything is genetic!”
“I’m not a moron!”
“You though frisson and masticate were both sexual terms!” said Lucy flatly.
James choked and turned pink, “What did you just say?”
I rolled my eyes, “It means to chew James.”
He looked doubtful but before he could open his mouth Lily interrupted, “We’ve already had this argument with Al, the bigger question is, how do we help Rose?”
“I think we already sorted that,” Said Freddy in a reasonable tone as he pointed at his bat.
“Not helpful.” Said Lucy flatly.
“Girls!” exclaimed James indignantly, “Are all of you on his side?”
Lucy, Lily and Roxie all nodded vehemently.
James looked at me and I sighed, “Surprisingly, he’s growing on me.”
This sent James, Al, Freddy and Hugo into such a speechless state of indignation that we could vaguely hear Rose’s voice rising semi-hysterically as she avowed, “It’s no one else’s business who I date!”
I snorted as Uncle Ron’s voice reached an even higher level than James’s, “IT RUDDY WELL IS WHEN YOU WANT TO DATE A RUDDY DEATH EATER!”
“HE’S NOT A DEATH EATER! HIS DAD WAS!”
“OH WELL THAT MAKES IT ALL PEACHY THEN DOESN’T IT?”
James chuckled, “Did Uncle Ron just say peachy?”
“STOP YELLING RONALD IT’S NOT CONSTURCTIVE PARENTING!”
At this stage Aunt Hermione stuck her head out the back door and gestured to Hugo, “We’re going home.”
“Is Rose ok?” I asked.
She sighed, “Her father is very upset and I’m not particularly thrilled either but I think this particular discussion is better had at home.”
She took one look at Hugo and rolled her eyes, “The bat isn’t coming.”
“Spoilsport,” muttered her husband as he emerged with a miserable looking Rose who gave me a tentative smile as she followed her parents into the back field to apperate home.
I wasn’t terribly surprised that we’d been home only a few minutes when Victoire walked into my room and shut the door firmly behind her.
“What on earth was that?” she demanded.
I sighed, “The inevitable ending to a clusterfuck of a secret relationship.”
“Was this what you and Rose were fighting about?”
I nodded and quickly caught her up on the whole story.
“Poor Malfoy!” she said when it was over.
I stared at her in astonishment, “Poor Malfoy? Why is he the person you immediately feel sorry for? That’s like reading The Warlock with the Hairy Heart and barracking for The Warlock…”
She sighed, “Since I very much doubt he intends to cut out Rose’s heart…”
“He might! He tried to kill me with a bludger.”
She sighed again and threw me a look of pity, “For once dearest, please accept that your feelings are irrelevant. You aren’t the central character in everyone else’s lives, much as we love you. Did you ever wonder why he felt the need to go to such desperate lengths?”
I blinked, “Because he’s insane…”
“Because Rose obviously makes him feel something no one else has, and for her to refuse to tell anyone must hurt him. How would you feel if Lysander said that he was embarrassed to be with you and you would just have to be content with making out in broom cupboards?”
I snorted, “If he was dumb enough to say that he’d find himself leaving said cupboard minus a certain part of his anatomy.”
Vic rolled her eyes, “All I know is that Teddy and I kept things quiet initially but it was because we wanted to be certain what was going on before we let everyone know.”
“You told me though!”
She smiled, “Yes, I did, but I can’t imagine how hard it would be knowing people are going to have strong reactions to your relationship that are negative! Teddy and I had a hard time with how involved everyone was in ours and that was because they were happy! This family isn’t exactly good at respecting personal choice or space!”
I nodded thoughtfully as I pictured James, Freddy and Hugo swearing vengeance with sporting equipment.
“You know Aunt Hermione said she has to invite him to dinner tonight?”
I burst out laughing, “Why?”
“Because it will give everyone a chance to build, and I quote, ‘a constructive discussion free from the prejudice and misconception fostered by secrecy’.”
I snorted, “I assume bats and snitches will be banned? Should we also confiscate everyone’s wands at the door just for good measure?”
Vic sighed and bit her lip thoughtfully, “Poor Rose!”
“This sounds like it will be even more traumatic than our double date.”
She giggled, “No offence Dom, but I don’t think anything would be more traumatic than a double date with you.”
I gasped in mock offence and threw a pillow at her making her giggle.
Louis strode into the room and rubbed is hands with glee, “Dinner tonight should be good!”
“Don’t do anything mischievous!” Said Vic firmly, “This will be bad enough without you and Lucy helping it along!”
“Me?” Louis made his most innocent face, which, with Maman’s blue eyes and pale hair made him look exactly like a renaissance cherub, “What could I do?”
I narrowed my eyes; “You certainly caused enough trouble at lunch with the whole frisson thing!”
He snorted, “Excuse me, Lucy’s fancy vocabulary combined with James’s idiocy created that fiasco, you and Al perpetuated it. I just sat back and laughed. Not my fault our family is clinically insane!”
As we walked into dinner at the Burrow that night, I really had to agree.
“What on earth possessed Uncle Ron to get the whole family to come?” worried Vic.
Teddy, who had arrived with us, snorted, “I think he’s hoping Malfoy scares easily.”
It was my turn to snort, “Not a chance.”
I quickly spotted Malfoy by following everyone else’s glares. He stood leaning against the wall, surveying the room as though he feared it might fall down, a familiar look of disdain on his face.
I sighed and walked over to him, “Skip, I’m going to give you some advice.”
He winced, “Please don’t call me that.”
I ignored him, “Stop smirking, it’s not helping the situation.”
“It’s a coping mechanism!”
“Well all it’s going to help you cope with is the snitch James plans to stick in your nether regions.”
He turned pale but still managed to say with an attempt at his customary smirk, “Pass my regrets onto Potter but I don’t swing that way.”
I groaned, “For Rose’s sake could you not act like a total tosser just for today?”
He rolled his eyes, “It’s enough that I’m here for Rose’s sake. Don’t push me. Have you ever walked into a room knowing everyone in it hated you?”
I blinked, “Not everyone hates you… Rose doesn’t and I don’t absolutely detest you…”
He snorted, “Thanks.”
“Plus I think Lily is on your side since she thinks forbidden love is romantic!”
He chuckled, “Well I suppose three out of twenty is better than I’d hoped for.” He gestured inside, “Lead the way Dominique my darling.”
At this a belligerent voice sounded out from behind us, “Why is Dominique your darling if you’re dating Rose? Are you trying to frisson all the women in this family?”
We turned around to see James glaring at Malfoy.
I rolled my eyes, “Again, not a sexual term.”
Malfoy chuckled, “No, one Weasley is enough for me to err… frisson… for the time being.”
I saw that James was starting to turn puce and I pinched Malfoy on the arm, “That’s not helping!” I hissed.
“I’m not here to get a lobotomy!” he hissed back as James stormed away, “Rose is dating me as I am! They might as well get used to it.”
“I can absolutely guarantee that no one here is ever going to just “get used” to you being an asshole.”
“Well they seem to have adapted to you being a bitch with remarkable alacrity,” he muttered.
“Do not call me that.”
“Skip!” I repeated, “You can lash out at me all you please, but you need to recognise…”
He burst out laughing, “You sound like my parents marriage coach…”
Again I just stared at him, “I really begin to wonder what sort of childhood you had.”
Rolling his eyes he strolled off towards the gardens in pursuit of Rose.
A familiar chuckle made me spin around in astonishment to see Lysander lounging against the doorway.
I stared at him in confusion, “What the fuck are you doing here?”
He burst out laughing, “I was invited.”
“Um, unless I have amnesia no, you weren’t.”
Kissing me, he rolled his eyes, “My girlfriend, ever the gracious hostess.”
I flushed, “It’s not that I’m not glad to see you!” I kissed him in return, “But I don’t get what you’re doing here.”
“Scorpius asked me to come, he won’t admit it but I think the thought of having dinner with an angry Weasley mob without any backup seemed overwhelming to him.”
I stared at him in astonishment, “I’m sorry but in what bizarre parallel universe are you and Malfoy friends?”
He chuckled, “I like him.”
“Should I leave you two alone together then?”
Ignoring me, he rolled his eyes, “has everyone managed to avoid hexing or hitting so far?”
I nodded, “We’re only ten minutes in though, give them time.”
“Excellent,” he offered me his arm and gestured towards the garden, “Shall we? Oh and just to clarify, you are planning on playing nice with Scorpius yes?”
I stuck out my tongue, “Don’t tell me what to do. But yes, as it happens, I am on his side. Did you not hear how polite I was just then?”
To begin with, dinner was going well. I had come to the conclusion that Malfoy must love Rose more than any of us knew since he seemed to have taken my advice to heart and was being unfailingly polite to even Uncle Ron’s most pointed comments.
I turned to Lysander, “Well this is going better than expected.”
He chuckled, “Poor Ron.”
“He’s trying his hardest to get a rise out of Skip and he’s not having any luck. Skip is winding him up by being as polite as possible so Ron never has a chance to vent. Being polite to your enemy can be the most frustrating thing you can do.”
I opened my eyes gleefully, “Genius! Why did I never think of that?”
“Because you lack subtlety and think chaos is an acceptable solution to boredom?” he suggested, kissing me swiftly.
I rolled my eyes, “Speaking of boredom, while I’m glad for Rose’s sake that tonight hasn’t evolved into a brawl, everyone being on their best behaviour makes me so bored I’m pretty sure my liver just died.”
He blinked, “Why on earth would your liver die of boredom?”
“Because the ship that is the fireworks I was expecting of this dinner is sinking and if I were an expendable body part I’d jump ship too.”
He threw me a look of absolute disgust, “Your liver isn’t expendable Dom.”
“Um I’m pretty sure it is, it’s one of those fake body parts left over from when we were dinosaurs.”
“Your understanding of both human history and biology is truly disturbing. I think you mean your appendix.”
I rolled my eyes, “Whatever, same thing…”
“Not remotely the same thing,” he interrupted.
“We were dinosaurs?” Demanded James who had apparently been listening to our conversation, “That is so fucking awesome!”
Lysander stared at him open mouthed, “Has anyone ever had him tested?” he demanded of me.
I shrugged, “Not that I’m aware of.”
James had bolted over to Freddy, his arms shortened to look like a T-Rex, roaring theatrically as he explained the situation.
Lysander and I watched, he in amazement, me in amusement, as the two of them began to enact a very realistic battle between a stegosaurus and a T-Rex. Hugo, demanding to be let in on the fun, immediately took on the role of a Triceratops and it wasn’t until they managed to upset the salad table that Nana Weasley intervened.
Aunt Hermione sighed as she waved her wand to repair the broken crockery, “Boys, you were never dinosaurs.”
Seeing James and Freddy’s crestfallen faces I chuckled, “Don’t listen to her! Keep dreaming kids, keep dreaming.”
“Dominique,” she said in a warning tone.
James, ignoring both of us, commenced trying to eat his steak using his tiny T-Rex arms.
“I never thought I would say this to anyone… ever,” Said Lysander, “But your family is crazier than mine.”
I snorted, “Oh really? Crumple Headed Snorkshacks anyone? At least Dinosaurs were once real.”
“Please don’t encourage him!” Al moved his plate to sit beside Lysander, “You do know that he’ll be acting like a dinosaur for the next few days at home now right?”
“It sounds like living with a hyperactive toddler,” Lysander observed.
Al grinned, “That’s a pretty good description of James, if that toddler also slept around.”
Lysander chuckled, “The toddler probably doesn’t do that…”
I snickered, “Don’t you go casting judgement on the morals or virility of this fictional toddler!”
My boyfriend gave me a look of mingled disgust and pity, “Please stop talking.”
I stuck out my tongue causing Lysander to kiss me soundly to “give me something else to do with my mouth.”
Al immediately began to mutter about feeling nauseous and walked off, leaving us to a very enjoyable fifteen minutes of PDA.
The calm was soon shattered though when Scorpius eventually lost patience with the snide comments coming from James, Freddy, Uncle Ron, Uncle George, Albus and Hugo and reverted to asshole mode.
“So Skip,” Said Hugo in a deceivingly pleasant voice, “May I call you Skip?”
Hugo, predictably, ignored him, “So Skip, why is it you felt the need to make out with my sister in broom closets instead of dating her like a decent human being would?”
Malfoy snorted, “What can I say? We’re both wildly attracted to cobwebs and spiders, gives it a certain extra flavour sexually.”
Rose blanched while Uncle Ron’s ears turned an alarming shade of red, whether from the mention of spiders or Rose being sexually active I wasn’t sure.
I grinned, “Finally some action.”
I winced as Vic, coming up behind me, pinched me, “Do not encourage this!”
Teddy chuckled as he followed in her wake, “Please do! This thing is so boring I think my liver is dying.”
I turned triumphantly to Lysander, “I told you that was a thing!”
“Not a thing!” snapped Vic flatly.
Lily sitting nearby, shushed us, “Uncle Ron is about to explode!”
“YOU’RE A RUDDY GIT! STAY AWAY FROM MY DAUGHTER!”
Malfoy smirked, “I doubt she’ll stay away from me.”
“He does seem to have a powerful appeal, though possibly that may be because of a subconscious desire to rebel on Rose’s part. Although it could also just be because he’s quite sexually attractive.” Interrupted Lucy thoughtfully.
Everyone stared at her in absolute stupefaction.
“I told you he had tricked Lucy into liking him using his frisson!” yelled James triumphantly.
Malfoy looked revolted, “I beg your pardon? She’s a child!”
“I am not a child!”
Freddy patted her awkwardly on the back, “I know the bad man told you that…”
Malfoy pulled out his wand, “I’ve put up with a lot at this dinner but if you’re implying I’m a bloody paedophile!”
“No one is calling anyone a paedophile!” interrupted Vic soothingly.
“I’m not a child!” insisted Lucy, “I’m thirteen which in many non western civilisations as well as historic England, both muggle and magical, would have made me a fully grown woman able to marry given menstruation has occurred…”
“Can we not discuss that at dinner?” Demanded Louis looking revolted.
Lysander and Teddy had both dissolved into hysterical, though silent laughter.
Uncle Ron and Uncle Percy had both turned red from mingled embarrassment and rage while Uncle Harry threw a desperate glance at his wife as if begging her to somehow intervene.
Unabashed Lucy continued, “Not that there’s anything happening with Malfoy and I, he’s obsessed with Rose and he’s not my type.”
“How the hell do you have a type you’re thirteen!” shrieked James.
“I have eyes!” she snapped in return.
Aunt Hermione sighed, “This really isn’t relevant…”
“I had a crush on Harry when I was in second year, girls know their type!” Was Aunt Ginny’s helpful intervention.
Uncle George and Aunt Angelina had also dissolved into hysterical laughter at this point.
Ron looked like he was having an apoplexy.
Nana Weasley sighed, “I think it’s time for dessert.”
Sorry that update took a while! But good news! My two one shot pieces, Blown Away, which is set quite a few years after this and is about James, and Lily Potter gets a life, also set later and about Lily, have been unblocked, Hooray! They do contain a couple of spoilers, but hopefully none too surprising.
I’ve also started a new story about Lucy after she finishes Hogwarts because she’s my favourite character and I couldn’t resist. It should be quite a short story, I intended it to be a one shot, but I think it will be about 5 or 6 chapters at this stage. It’s called “Be Reasonable” and I would love if people gave it a read and let me know what you think! Here is the summary:
He gritted his teeth again and forced himself to speak slowly, “No one is this logical, you’re clearly a maniac.”
She smirked and raised one eyebrow, “Coming from the man who kidnaps the wrong girl and then gets angry because she remains calm and does not have hysterics?”
Lucy Weasley prides herself on being clever, calm and composed. Enter Alexei Dolohov, add a wrongful kidnapping, two insane Weasley family weddings and a serious case of mistaken identity and her legendary logic might just fail her...
So there we go! Lot’s of new stuff out there, as always I live for reviews!
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