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Naive by ohmymerlin
Chapter 7 : Chapter the Seventh
Rating: MatureChapter Reviews: 1

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After that nice chat with Cameron and Mum, I’ve decided that I’m going to wait a bit to try and organise my finances before diving headfirst in this whole bakery thing. It’s the smarter choice.

I know that I can just ask Mum and Dad for money (who have whole heartedly insisted that I use their money) but I think I would feel better if I do this myself. I will need their help with some things, especially Dad with the whole Muggle thing because he knows a lot more than I do. I only did Muggle Studies for a week before deciding that it was too boring for me and then I switched to Divination.

I DON’T KNOW WHY I DID THAT. Aunt Hermione repeatedly told me I’d hate it but I was being stubborn back then and picked it anyway. It’s my biggest regret in life.

Anyway, I’ve just been working so much (except for Christmas and New Year’s, which was extremely uneventful – we just went to the Burrow as per usual and ate about three tonnes of food, although I did get a nice new Weasley jumper from Nana. It’s so warm and I wear it all the time) but my shifts have changed and I have two days in a row where I’m not working.

This means that Glitter has taken it upon himself to set me up with some people.

Yes, Glitter’s tour thingy has come to an end so he now has a whole lot of time and is still trying to get me to cross off something else on the list. I refuse to be taken shopping (my clothes are FINE) so he’s set me up on a date.

And that’s what I’m doing right now. I’m getting ready and frowning at Glitter who is completely raiding my wardrobe.

“Do you mind not throwing everything I own onto the carpet? I don’t want to bother putting it back in the wardrobe and it’s going to get dirty,” I say exasperatedly, pulling down the dress which is far too short (I used to wear it when I was thirteen. I was fat and short back then), “and this dress is terrible. It doesn’t fit at all.”

Glitter tuts. “Just use magic. For both.” He sounds muffled because his head is buried in my wardrobe.

I roll my eyes, still tugging at the dress. I can actually see my knickers. “I can use magic for the clothes on the floor, but when I use magic to change the way a piece of clothing fits… well, it doesn’t work.”

“What do you mean it doesn’t work?” he asks, still immersed in my small dress collection.

“It goes all wonky. I dunno. It just doesn’t work,” I say spinning around to see that my bum is completely visible in the dress. I start pulling down the dress but it nearly rips so I stop and huff loudly.

He nods and then looks at me and bursts into loud laughter. “Holy shit. That doesn’t work, does it?!”

“That’s what I’ve been telling you for the past ten minutes!” I say in an outrage.

He laughs and throws another dress at me. “Try this on. You’ll be able to wear tights with that.”

I nod and pull off the tiny dress. I hear a rip but I quickly wave my wand over it to fix it. I still have a bra on (not that I even need it honestly) and I’m not embarrassed if Glitter sees me like this. We’re related; we used to have baths together so it isn’t too bad.

The only time I would kick him out if I was completely naked. No one can see me completely naked.

I tug on the new dress and am satisfied that it fits really well. I love this dress. It’s just a plain blue, but I’ve always liked the cut. It gives the illusion that I have breasts.

That’s always a plus.

I pull on some stockings and tell Glitter to stop ransacking my wardrobe because I’ve decided that this is the outfit I’m going to wear. No arguing.

He sighs and after I’ve pulled the stockings up to my waist, he orders me to sit down so he can do my hair. He starts doing some twisty thing but in the end it just looks like a normal braid that I could have done on my own. I thank him anyway and quickly apply some simple make-up.

“So, can you at least tell me who you’re setting me up with?” I ask as I pull on my brown boots.

“His name is Jerome,” he says and I immediately think of someone that is a bit posh and French. “He’s still studying law, so that’s how I know him and he is extremely cute.”

I giggle. “That’s good then. When is he going to pick me up? And what was the excuse you used to say why I didn’t have a mobile?” Whenever I talk to Glitter’s Muggle friends they look so confused that I don’t own a mobile phone. They are way too dependent on technology.

“He’s going to pick you up at six thirty.” I look at the time and realise it’s twenty five past so I hurry out to the living room ad Glitter follows me and sits on the couch. “And I said that you accidentally broke your old one and you just can’t be bothered to get a new one.”

“Thanks, how do I look?” I do a little twirl and he claps. “You look fantastic,” he says.

I grin and then there’s a buzz at the door and Glitter nearly falls off the couch in his excitement. He runs to the little box and says into it, “Hello?”

A voice responds. “Bruce. It’s Jerome, I’m here for Lily?”

I notice Glitter doesn’t scowl at the use of his first name like he usually does. I raise my eyebrows but he jerks his head to the door. “She’ll be down in a mo. Have fun!” He then releases his finger off the button and says, “Go downstairs! The poor fella is probably freezing!”

“I’m going, I’m going!” I say. “But what’s the box thing called again? In case he asks?”

“An intercom, now go!” He practically shoves me out the door. I quickly make my way down the stairs and outside to see a very tall guy waiting for me.

“Hi,” I say nervously, “I’m Lily.”

He grins. “I figured. Jerome Herault. Pleasure to meet you.”

“It’s nice to meet you too,” I say shyly. I wrap my hands around my body to try and keep warm.

He notices and says, “Do you want to get going? I heard this restaurant is amazing.”

I nod. “Sure.” He starts to walk and I follow him to the car. He holds open the door like a perfect gentleman and I slide in, smiling. This is my first ‘official’ date. I had a few dates in Hogsmeade but more often than not we were too awkward to do anything and it generally ended up as a disaster. The most memorable one is definitely when James jinxed the guy so he would only speak in rhyme. It was a good time.

That was completely unintentional.

He hops in the car shortly after and starts fiddling with all sorts of dials and buttons that I have no idea about, but the car suddenly warms up and the radio starts playing so I’m not going to start complaining.

He reverses out and after getting into the main street, he says, “So, Lily… Something. Tell me about yourself.”

I laugh and say, “My last name is Potter. I’m currently working at a pub and trying to start my own business as a bakery. Tell me about yourself, Jerome Herault.”

“I’m in uni. I want to become a lawyer and hopefully that’s going to happen soon. Are you in uni?” he asks, glancing at me.

I shake my head. “Nah, I didn’t go. I didn’t want to or need to.”

He looks at me in confusion. “I thought you needed a degree in business to start up your own?” My mind goes blank but then he says, “Oh wait, no I don’t think you do. Never mind me.” I breathe a silent sigh of relief and he continues, “So, tell me a bit more about yourself. What’s your favourite colour?”

“Hmm… probably purple? I have no idea. Or orange. I like most colours. What about you?” I ask.

“Green.” Immediately I go to say jokingly ‘Slytherin’ but he’s a Muggle and he probably won’t understand what the hell I’m on about.

Instead I smile and nod. “That’s cool. What kind of things are you into?”

He gives me a sidelong look. “What do you mean?”

I flounder. “Er… books, television shows?”

“Oh no, I don’t watch television. It rots your brain. And I only ever read law books,” he says pompously.

I look at him in surprise. “What?” He glances down at me and I blush and say, “Alright then… what are your hobbies?”

He purses his lips. “I like collecting things.”

Involuntarily, my mouth says, “Like bodies?” He looks at me in shock and I clap a hand over my mouth. “Just trying to make a joke,” I mumble. “Sorry…” I make a mental note to think about what I say. “What things do you collect?”

“Stamps,” he says after thinking about it for a long time. “And sometimes pins. Just to spice it up a little.”

I look out the window to hide my horrified expression. It seems that this man is the most boring person on the planet.

And I’m stuck with him for two hours.

Oh, joy.

The date was torturous. It was the most horrific thing I’ve ever had to endure. He was literally the most mundane human being. At dinner, he talked about all sorts of ‘exciting’ things like the amount of decibels an earphone could carry. Not only did I have no freaking clue what he was on about, but it was something so boring that even the people on the tables surrounding us started to get sleepy listening to him.

He tried to kiss me before I left the car but I leant so far back that I nearly fell out of the car. No regrets, though.

Now I’m in my pyjamas in bed, happy with the thought that I don’t understand Muggle technology and he has very little ways of communicating with me.

Glitter is unhappy with my disastrous date so he’s forcing me to go on another one in a few days. With my terrible first experience with Jerome, I’m kind of reluctant but Glitter is insisting.


I’m about to go on my date. I’ve just repeated the outfit that I wore with Jerome except I have different shoes on but don’t tell anyone. This time we’re going to a movie theatre so there’ll be less talking which seems to be a good option.

At seven, Mark picks me up and in the cinema, he tries the ‘yawn-and-put-his-unwelcome-arm-around-me’ but it didn’t work out.

Because he did it to the wrong girl.

Definitely not for me. He’s sweet, but not very bright. To the point of him confused as to what an eggbeater is.

This whole ‘dating’ thing really isn’t working for me, is it?

After a couple of weeks, I met one of Glitter’s friends when he came over to help him with the music part of his dancing, and he asked me out so now I’m going on another date. Although, Glitter didn’t set us up (however, he’s taking credit already) so I have high hopes.

Liam picks me up in the day so we can have lunch together. Although we talked a lot when he came over, we never run out of things to say. It’s actually a really good date.

The waitress comes over with our food and when I twirl the pasta around, something black catches my eye. I look into the bowl and notice a long black hair in it. I gag and whisper, “Liam, there’s a hair in my food.”

He grimaces and looks into the bowl. “Ew!” He opens his own burger and notices a hair melted in the cheese as well. “Oh god, that’s vile,” he says, scrunching his face up.

He beckons the waitress over and he says quietly, “We can’t accept this food.” She looks confused but then he tells her about the hair and she looks horrified.

“I’m so sorry, sir. We’ll reimburse you with another meal, I’m so sorry,” she says, her eyes the size of saucers.

Liam shakes his head. “No, no. If it’s alright we’ll just go somewhere else.” She looks like she’s about to argue but Liam just pulls on his coat and says to me, “Let’s go, Lily.” I nod and let Liam help me with my coat. We walk out and he says, “Well that was off-putting.”

I agree and say, “Where should we go now?”

Liam shrugs and says, “Should we just go to the local McDonalds?”

I brighten up. “Sure! I haven’t been there since I was about eight!”

He looks at me incredulously. “Eight?! That’s basically what I live on, being a musician!”

I laugh and say, “Mum and Dad didn’t really like us going there. The last time we were there, my brother ate something gross and was sick everywhere. We didn’t care but Mum and Dad did, and I guess I just never went back afterwards.”

Liam laughs and puts an arm around me to keep us warm (amongst other things) but I don’t mind. We have a lovely first date and at the end, he kisses me on the cheek and promises to take me to one of his gigs at the local pub on Saturday night.

On Saturday night, I’m waiting nervously inside the pub. Liam told me he’d meet me here and I feel so out of place. I have a beer in my hands but it isn’t as good as Butterbeer. Muggle beer is a lot more… bitter? I don’t know how to explain it. I’m tentatively sipping it when I hear, “Lily? What are you doing here?”

I whirl around and see Al standing behind me, grinning. I put down my beer and go to hug him but he sidesteps me and picks the beer up. “Don’t leave your drink unattended,” he says sternly. “Muggle people always try to spike it, especially young girls.”

I roll my eyes and take the beer off him. “I’m here to watch a…” I think about what to call Liam; “a friend’s gig.”

He frowns. “I have a gig tonight. Who’s your friend?”

I open my mouth to say but then Liam pops up next to me and puts an arm around my waist. “Lily! I see you’ve met my band-mate, Al! Al, this is the girl I’m da—”

“Wait,” I cut Liam off. “You guys are in a band together?!”

Al nods and Liam says, “Yes, do you guys know each other?”

I laugh and say, “This is the brother I was talking about the other day!” His eyes widen and he slowly removes his arm around my waist as I laugh. “Liam and I went on a date,” I explain to Al. “I told him the time you ate a heap of McDonalds and puked everywhere.”

“Cheers, Lily,” he says. Although Al doesn’t look happy and Liam looks a bit scared.

I roll my eyes again. “Al, stop it.” Al grunts and I say to Liam, “Ignore him. He’s just being a grump. So are you excited for your gig?”

Liam nods and Al says, “Yeah, we should get going. See you, Lil.” He stalks off and I shake my head at him.

“He doesn’t like the idea of me knowing any men, don’t worry about it,” I say to Liam to try and reassure him. “Just have fun out there, okay?”

Liam looks more relaxed and quickly pecks me on the lips. “Thanks. I’ll see you soon, okay?” I nod, dumbfounded that my first kiss was about two seconds long and not romantic at all.

That’s a bit of a disappointment. I sip my beer again and ignore the flush that’s quite clearly on my cheeks and neck. When I was younger I full imagined a whole romantic setting, maybe even on the beach and this massive she-bang but it was a two second, pub kiss. Disappointed doesn’t even cover it.

I find a stool to sit on at the bar and wait for them to come on stage. They finally come on stage and I’m pleasantly surprised. Whenever Al talked about his band, I always thought it was terrible singing and bad guitar playing but they’re actually really talented.

Al especially. I had no idea he was that good with drums and singing. I’ve no idea what they’re singing, but it’s definitely catchy.

Liam is playing guitar and he’s very talented. He has a tiny little solo but I can’t help but be a bit smug that Al has a longer solo. It’s the sister in me.

At the end of it, I clap and cheer with the rest of the pub but when they start talking about selling their albums I tune out. I finish off my beer and get off the stool, walking closer to the exit that they will come out of.

Al comes out first and I give him a big hug. He grins and says, “You liked it?”

I nod. “Yes! I didn’t realise how good you were! You were amazing!”

He chuckles and ruffles my hair up. I notice that he’s a bit sweaty so I step away from him. Then Liam comes out and I give him a hug and a congratulations.

He grins but before he can shower me with any affection, I step away from him. I’m still a bit iffy that my first kiss was so uneventful but he keeps an arm around my waist, which I don’t mind.

The rest of the band (which is only two other members) come outside and I introduce myself to them. They both have a laugh about the shock that we all had when we found out we all knew each other and then I tell them I need to head off because I need to go to work tomorrow.

I wave at them all and tell Al I’ll see him at the Burrow for my birthday next week, to which he replies, “CRAP. I completely forgot. What do you want?”

Cheers, Al.

Liam offers to walk me outside so I don my coat and we walk out together. He says, “Do you want me to come to your birthday?”

I shake my head. “Oh, no. Don’t worry about it; it’s just going to be family.”

He looks offended. “Don’t you want your parents to know that we’re dating?”

I stare at him. “That’s not it, it’s just a family thing and we’ve really only been on one date. I’d feel uncomfortable. We can always do something the day before, though.” I wave my hand to signal a taxi.

“Are you ashamed of me?” he demands. I look away and drop my hand causing the taxi to just drive past me. I huff a sigh of annoyance.

“No. It would be inappropriate to bring a guy – who I’ve only been on one date with – to a family function,” I say crossly.

“Yeah, but it’s for you,” he insists.

I finally get a taxi and open the door but not before saying, “I said no. Okay? We’ll talk about it later.”

I close the door and tell the driver my address, not looking at Liam at all as he drives us away.

Wow, good going, Lily. Your first date went well but you couldn’t even make it to a second date. Good work.

I’m such a loser.

So after that eventful scenario, I don’t talk to Liam for a few days. He’s being a right arse and I don’t understand the incessant need for him to come to my family gathering. He’s completely in the wrong.

I talk to Glitter about it and he frowns. “I don’t get it? He just wants to spend time with you?”

I shake my head. “No, it wasn’t that. He was basically demanding that I let him come and he started spouting off that I’m ashamed of him or whatever.”

Glitter bites on his lip and closes his laptop lid and places it on the coffee table in front of him. “That’s weird. Has he asked you to be his girlfriend or anything?”

“No, he hasn’t!” I cry out. “He just kissed me and said we were dating, which is fine but he’s not even my actual boyfriend.”

“WOAH, WOAH, WOAH. HE KISSED YOU?!” Glitter screeches. I blink and nod and he shrieks, “WHY DIDN’T YOU TELL ME?!”

“I thought I did,” I say honestly.

He rolls his eyes and gushes, “Was it magical? Everything you hoped for and more?”

I pout. “No. It was about two seconds long and he walked away afterwards. It was just a peck. He didn’t even ask me and kind of uncomfortable.”

Glitter holds up a hand. “He didn’t ask permission?” I shake my head and he exhales angrily. “Lily, look I know I’ve been saying you need to get a move on and sleep with someone, you prude, but…”

“What?” I ask in confusion. He’d been at me for so long to stop being a prude and now he’s changing his mind? Ack, he’s such a confusing person.

“If a guy touches you in any way, and he hasn’t asked permission, even with kissing – I mean, it would be a different scenario if you’d been dating for a while, but you’ve only gone on one date – you tell him when you’re uncomfortable or when he’s crossed a line. You do everything when you’re ready, not whenever he’s ready. If you’re not ready until marriage, then that’s fine, you hear me?” he says seriously. It’s a lot different from normal Glitter, but this change isn’t so bad.

I blink again. “But… what about the list?” I ask meekly.

He chuckles and grips my hand. “Lily, I was only joking about that. I thought you’d say something but you never did so I just left it. So, just do everything when you’re ready. Okay?” I nod and he smiles and starts to relax back onto the lounge but then sits up again. “Or if he’s not ready and you are, you wait. Okay? But I highly doubt he’ll never be ready. There are some guys – and bless their souls – that do want to wait but with my experience, they’re pretty eager.”

I laugh and tell him, “Yeah, but you go for the sluts.”

“Slut is a made up term.” He sniffs angrily. “It’s just for people that are jealous that we’re getting sex and they aren’t.”

I pat his knee affectionately. “Obviously.” He ruffles my hair and pulls his laptop towards him.

He glances up at me. “Wanna watch the new Doctor Who?”

I scoff, “Of course.” I scoot closer towards him and pull the blanket from the back of the couch to wrap ourselves in. Glitter’s a pretty whacky guy (for god’s sake he calls himself Glitter) but he’s a pretty clever guy. And a pretty good friend.

Thank god I’m related to him.

Liam ended up coming over and apologising to me and I think he still expected me to say, ‘Aw, you apologised! Come to my birthday thing tomorrow! It’s cool!’ but when I didn’t he looked annoyed but didn’t argue with me.

I hope that’s a good thing.

But tonight I’m just in warm pyjamas and getting ready for the Burrow. I told everyone to wear their pyjamas; I’m not going to be offended because that’s what I’m wearing. It’s my birthday, I do what I want.

Oh yeah, it’s my birthday today! I’m nineteen! Yay!

Except nineteen isn’t really an amazing birthday. It’s just kind of there.

I say bye to Glitter – who is finally going out again and is taking a long time to prepare because he feels so depraved – and turn on the spot with a loud crack!

When I open my eyes, I’m out the front door of the Burrow and instead of knocking, I just let myself in. The Burrow is basically my second home.

Wait. It’s more like a third home now, I guess? I dunno.

I walk into the kitchen and Nana basically flings herself at me. “Happy birthday, Lily!” She gives me a kiss and I hug her tightly. I love Nana; she’s one of my most favourite people in the world.

“Thank you, Nana,” I say.

She grins up at me (I’m pretty tall and Nana has always been rather short) and says, “Your mother tells me you started planning your bakery?”

I nod excitedly and say, “Yeah! Except I’m going to wait a bit to get all the finances and things sorted and—”

“Lily, dear, we’ll help you out if you need it!” Nana says. Even though they’re still not the richest of people, if they helped me out with my bakery, they wouldn’t have enough money to spread around the rest of my cousins and that’s just too unfair of me to ask for such things.

“Nana, don’t worry. I’ve got it all sorted. I’ll need your help once it’s started though. Mostly with the cooking.”

“Of course,” she says. “Now let’s go into the living room where they’re all waiting for you!”

I nod and she leads me to the living room where my whole family is waiting for me. They all shout, “HAPPY BIRTHDAY, LILY!”

I laugh and start to hug and kiss all of them; it’s basically a whole circle. I notice that I’m the only one in pyjamas (aside from Ted and Victoire’s kids, including their two new baby boys) and Mum shakes her head at me. I stick my tongue out at her and turn away to say a gentle hello to the gorgeous little boys. Victoire only had them not even a month ago but her body had already returned to her pre-pregnancy shape.

I hate her sometimes.

Although, I think running around after her psycho kids made her really fit and she ate pretty healthily, so that’s always a positive of having a crazy amount of children.

The not-so-positive is probably that both Ted and Vic look like zombies because they seem to be super exhausted.

Mostly the night is spent at all of us cooing over baby Jasper and baby Tristen.

I don’t mind though, they’re adorable and Tristen spat up all over Al. His face was priceless.

Hi everyone! I've returned from exams safe and sane (well, mostly :p) and I'm going to have four months of complete freedom. I'm also rebelling for NaNo, I'm going to try and write 30,000 words for this story! I've written about 9k already, so hopefully I can do this!

However, I am going away on the 23rd and not returning until the 30th so for that week, I will be missing (and maybe a few days afterwards as I'm going away with all my friends so we probably won't get a wink of sleep, haha :p)

Anyway, I know that al these chapters are kind of fillery and boring, but things do happen in the future chapters, don't worry! :)

Anywho, thanks for reading! I really appreciate every reader I have! :)

Disclaimer: Doctor Who is owned by BBC and is not my creation in any way.

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