Chapter 19 : Maylin is in Love
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I’ve been sitting on the floor in Trelawney’s classroom for hours now, and I know it sounds insensitive but waiting to discover the fate of a close friend is extremely boring. I don’t do boring.
Scorpius is asleep at Rose’s side, her hand still in his. Poor thing exhausted himself with worry. Freddie is snoring by Trelawney’s desk while Lily and Roxanne sleep cuddled up next to him. He’s been talking to me a lot lately; he’s actually a really nice guy despite his mischievous reputation. Above them on the desk is Hugo and Song passed out in each other’s arms, which I’m not too happy about. But I’ll talk to her about that later. Albus is asleep too; he has his head on the shoulder of… James. The only other person in the room that’s awake.
He looks up just then, and sees me looking at him. The second our eyes meet we look away, just like we’ve been doing all night. Slowly I look back up, and I see that he’s doing the same. He opens his mouth like he’s about to say something, but before he can I bring my finger up to my lips to shush him. I motion to all of the sleeping people in the room so he understands I don’t want to wake them, and then tip my head towards the door to suggest we go outside to talk. He nods, and slowly we both stand up. He gently lays Albus’ sleeping head down on the floor and opens the door for me like a gentleman. I want to laugh at the combination of James and chivalry.
He leads the way up to the top of the tower, and the cool outside air helps to clear my head; the sun has just risen, and it’s a beautiful view. I start to lose my confidence, but I regain it quickly when I recite the phrase that’s practically been my personal mantra the last couple days. I know James is in love with me, I have the power here. I am in control of this situation.
But then he runs his hand through his hair, and I instantly know I’m just as powerless to him as he is to me. “Don’t touch your hair like that,” I tell him.
“Because I like touching your hair. It’s mine. Don’t touch it,” I tell him frankly.
He tilts his head defensively, “I’m sorry, is that why you’ve been avoiding me for two days now?”
“You’ve been avoiding me! Chase was right, this whole making out without emotions thing is obviously not working. Where is she, anyway?” I somehow change the subject, slightly on purpose.
James sits down on the ground, “She and Louis went to the library and have been M.I.A ever since. For a while I thought they’d just gone into the Room of Requirement for to shag or something but after the second hour passed I knew that wasn’t it. There is no way Louis has that kind of stamina, especially with the way he drools after Chase.”
“Okay, okay, I do not need to hear about Louis’s stamina. Especially considering he’s now the boyfriend of one of my closest friends. But they wouldn’t do that, anyways.”
“You mean Louis wouldn’t let Chase do that. She obviously wants the L.”
“…Did you just—?”
“Yes. Yes I did just refer to my best friend’s man parts as the L, in reference to the fact that his name begins with an L. And yes, I quickly regretted that decision. I’m the type of person that learns things as I go.”
I lay down next to him and look up at the night sky, “So I guess that means you have no idea what to do about us now?”
James is silent. He’s still sitting up, so I can’t see his face. Finally, he says something, “I suppose I can honestly say that I have never accidentally confessed love to one of my best friends in front of my entire family.”
“Well, not your entire family. Just all of your cousins within school age.”
“Wow Maylin, that makes everything so much better,” his voice raises just to yelling volume, “Now can we please just figure out what the hell we’re supposed to do about the fact that I am completely in love with you? I have tried to stop but you know what? I can’t. So I’m just going to keep saying it. I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you! There, I’ve said it, I’ve said it five times, now can we please be us again?”
I sit up and look him in the eye, “Damn it, James! Why do you have to go and do that? Why do you have to be such an asscandle but then go and tell me these things that just drive me insane? What am I supposed to say to that? Because when I talk to you I don’t know what to say so I say these quotes that express how I feel but at this moment I can’t think of anything! Not Shakespeare, not Dickens, not Hemingway, and not a single one of the Bronte sisters have any words or lines that can express this deep, confusing hatred I have towards you! So please, if you can think of any quotes to describe how I feel right now, go ahead and throw it in!”
I’m breathing heavily from my rant, and James is looking at me strangely. He repositions himself so that we’re closer, and I have to look him in the eye; quietly but powerfully, he gives me the quote I’m missing, “I love you.”
He’s right. Oh my God, he’s right. An odd feeling of relaxation comes over me, and before I know it I hear the beautiful quote flow out through my mouth, “I love you.”
James smiles, and I smile, and he’s still looking into my eyes and for a second I’m sure he’s going to kiss me. He pulls back and brings his hands together in a clap of finality, “Right then. Now that we’ve got that messy bit out of the way, what are we to do with each other?”
“I could think a few things.”
“GET YOUR MIND OUT OF THE GUTTER, MAYLIN. I’M TALKING ABOUT OUR LIVES HERE. Anyhow, want to be my girlfriend or something?”
Girlfriend. The teenage girl in me found that word so appealing. But then there’s another part that finds the idea of that so… boring. I mean really, James Potter and me? In a relationship? That’s just so bizarre.
“Oh, no,” he whines before I can say a word, “I know that look. Come on, Maylin. What’s wrong with being normal?”
“I just need to think, this is a big decision. It’s not like I’m deciding on what shoes to wear.”
“I’d cut up my heart for you to wear if you wanted it.”* Great, now he was quoting Gone With the Wind.
“No,” I tell him and from the look on his face I think he thinks I’m answering his previous question, “I don’t mean No, I won’t be your girlfriend. I mean no, don’t use that quote. That’s from Scarlett to Ashley. I don’t want to be Scarlett and Ashley, and I don’t want to be Scarlett and Rhett either. Now that I think about it, there aren’t a lot of couples in classic literature that I want to be.”
“We don’t have to be anybody, May. Let’s just be us, together.”
“Where is this coming from, anyway? Two hours ago you wouldn’t even speak to me.”
“I saw Scorpius sitting with Rose. I would stay next to you, you know, if you were in a coma. I don’t think I would ever leave. And then I started to wonder why on earth I was leaving you when you’re perfectly awake.”
I give him a stern look, “Okay, you’re starting to sound like Louis with Chase in all this sweet talk business. I’m going to be straight with you, just like always. I want to be with you, but I don’t want to be stuck with the idea of everyone thinking we’re in a relationship,” I realize how heartless I sound, but this wasn’t the James I love speaking. I love the James that would laugh at this kind of gushy business and then, without warning, say some stupid pun and kiss my face off. Emotions were not his strongest suit, and they’re not exactly mine either; how am I supposed to handle all this?
“Then what do you want?” James looks at me with frustration, “You want me to admit how I feel, and then you get angry once I do. You don’t want to continue snogging in secret, but you don’t want to openly date me,” he adjusts himself so he’s on his knees and clasps his hands together prayer-style in his overdramatic James way, “PLEASE, JUST TELL ME WHAT YOU WANT FROM ME!”
“I WANT SOME CHOCOLATE, OKAY?” I shout back at him before taking a deep, angst-filled breath, “I’m sorry, but I don’t have everything figured out. I’m not Rose. I’m not Louis. I’m not one of those people who know exactly what they want and when they want it. In fact, my frustration about that fact is probably one of the reasons I’m being so terrible right now when you’re being so sweet.”
“Damn right I’m being sweet! It’s like… It’s like… You’re a Keeper, right?”
“But I’m a Seeker.”
“I know, but in my metaphor you’re a Keeper. Heh, I just realized the double-meaning in that. Anyway, I’m the Chaser, and I have this Quaffle of Love. But you won’t let me score a goal through the hoop of your heart.”
Leave it to James Potter to express his feelings to me through a Quidditch metaphor, “But you’re not throwing Quaffles. You’re throwing Bludgers.”
He makes an unintelligible groaning noise, “What, then? You know what, let’s just actually do what we’ve been trying to accomplish since second year. Let’s just be normal friends, no face smashing involved.”
“Fine with me,” I get up and stomp back down to the Divination classroom. If that’s what James wants, he can have it. I am done with him. Besides, he probably wouldn’t be completely clean to be with anyways. He’s definitely been with his fair share of girls here at Hogwarts. He’s constantly bragged to me about his conquests, and quite honestly I’m glad I don’t have to become one of them.
Or am I? I think back on what Rose told me. Or what she had begun to tell me, before she interrupted herself to go and get herself stuck in a freaking coma.
I had been talking to her about James, and how I didn’t care about all this love junk because he was a man-whore anyways.
“Oh,” the red-headed beauty had said, “Maybe he’s not as easy as you think…” I looked at her like she was crazy, so she continued, “Oh, pooh noodles. Why did he make me swear to specifically not tell YOU? Let’s just say he’s not quite the stud he likes you to think he is.”
Before I had been able to question her further, we’d reached Trelawney’s classroom and it all obviously went downhill from there.
I walk into the classroom again now, ignoring the messy-haired boy coming in behind me. Fred and Albus have woken up; they’re sitting next to each other in quiet, casual conversation.
When they see us their conversation stops, as if they’re waiting for us to say something. Albus raises his eyebrow, “Well?”
“Well what?” James’ voice sounds raspy as he sits down next to his brother.
Al sighs exasperatedly, “Did you two go up on the roof to talk or did you just spend the whole time dinky dunking?”
“Dinky dunking?” I ask.
“You know what I mean. Fucking, whatever the kids call it these days.”
“Oh. Nah we didn’t do that. We decided we’re better off as just friends, for real this time,” James waves it off nonchalantly.
“Really? For sure?” Fred asks. I notice him looking rather fine this evening; his cappuccino-colored skin always makes his blue eyes sparkle in comparison. Plus, he’s a Beater which gives him quite a nice build if I do say so myself.
“For sure,” I deadpan in reply.
“So it wouldn’t be entirely inappropriate if, after all of this mess with Rose clears up, you and I went to Hogsmeade together?”
I wasn’t exactly expecting that.
“I don’t know, Fred,” James shrugs, “She’s probably not quite over me yet. I mean she was really in to me.”
What the actual fug? “Actually, I am pretty sure I’m fine. I’d love to go to Hogsmeade with you. In fact, why not make it a double date? Sienna Khan and her boyfriend just broke up, and I know James was already quite familiar with her even when she was in a relationship. We should all four go together.”
James is giving me an odd look. Fred is smiling in happy ignorance. Albus has a look of pure fear on his face because he understands that he’s most likely sitting in the middle of a war zone.
Finally, James snorts, “And then maybe Al here can take Jenny Corner and her boyfriend.”
Albus tackles James quite quickly, and they begin wrestling like brothers do. It used to be that James would win in a heartbeat, but ever since Albus started doing yoga his body was tricked out.
“Does Al have a thing for Jenny Corner?” I ask Fred as we watch the Potter boys fight.
“I don’t know. It seems like it. I didn’t know he even knew her.”
“He shouldn’t like her. Jenny and Sienna are my friends and all, but Albus is too sweet for the both of them combined.”
“So you want James to date Sienna but you don’t even like the idea of Al having a crush on Jenny?”
“Yep, that about covers it. Besides, I’ve always gotten the feeling that Jenny has a thing for Danny Boot. So it’d just be confusing if she broke Albus’ heart for a guy, Danny, who had previously had somewhat of a romantic relationship with Al’s ex-girlfriend, Chase, not to mention I’m pretty sure he slept with the ex-girlfriend of Louis who is Chase’s current boyfriend.”
“What the fu—? This is confusing. Why can’t the people in this family date outside of our social circle?”
“I don’t know, I guess that’s just how things work at Hogwarts. You’ve always dated outside of the social circle, though.”
“Until now,” he gives me one of those crooked grins girls go crazy for. James does it better, a little voice in my head says. I make sure the other voices in my head gag that one with a sock.
“WE’RE HERE!” I hear Chase’s voice as she and Louis burst through the door, “WE HAD TO FLY IN THE ANGLIA AND MAKE UP A FAKE WEDDING TO A GUY NAMED FRICHARD WHO HAS TWO THUMBS AND HAD TO CLEAN UP REGURGITATED KITTEN, BUT WE’RE HERE.”
I decide that asking what the fuck she was talking about isn’t my top priority at the moment, “Where were you guys? Did you figure out how to help Rose?”
By now she’s woken up everyone in the room (Rose obviously excluded), but Chase doesn’t seem to care as she and Louis rush forward to the sleeping beauty on the floor. Louis quickly takes a vial out of his pocket and hands it to Scorpius, who is extremely alert for someone that has been passed out for the last four hours. Without hesitation, Scorp gently opens the mouth of the mother of his child and pours the liquid in. And then…
The entire room looks at Louis and Chase questioningly.
“It’s supposed to take five to ten minutes for her to wake up. It will work, I swear,” Louis explains. Everyone groans. Nobody in this family was remarkable at being patient.
I watch Louis look down at Chase, and I see a smile shared between them. It wasn’t meant for anyone except for the two of them, but I saw it. It also doesn’t escape my notice that she was wearing his jacket. It was huge on her, but she was wearing it. For a moment, all I can see is James and me. Him smiling down at me like that, like he wants nothing more than to love me forever, as I’m wrapped in the warmth of his jacket. I shake myself out of the fantasy. You could have had that, stupid, the voice from earlier says, He asked you to be his girlfriend, and you said no. Whose fault is that?
This stupid voice is really starting to get on my nerves.
I go over and sit down by Rose’s still body. I really hope that whatever it is Chouis gave her works, because I really needed to talk to her about all of this. It used to be I would just keep it all to myself, but I suppose I’ve gotten into the habit of confessing everything lately. Usually, on the occasions when I do need girl talk, I’ll talk to both Rose and Chase. But Chase has been going through so much with her mom, and now that she’s dating Louis she’s so happy, Rose and I kind of made an agreement not to bother her with any of our problems. She deserves to just be happy for a while—
Rose’s eyes burst open, and she takes in a huge gasp of air as she sits up quickly. Looking around, obviously confused, she starts to sob right there. Chase seems to be moving in slow motion as she pushes everyone out of the way, in a rush to get to her best friend.
“Rose, Rose! I’m so happy you’re awake, oh I’m so happy it worked! Rosey Tosey, please don’t cry, please tell me you’re okay!”
“No!” Rose shrieks, “Get away from me!”
Chase looks hurt and confused, but she nods, “Okay, everyone, she wants some space.”
A/N: Kind of a crazy, rushing chapter, I hope it all reads okay! Why is Rose angry at Chase?:o Anyways, everybody please review with thoughts, favorite quotes/lines, favorite parts, favorite characters, constructive criticism, the likes (: and thank you for reading this story thus far and hopefully until the end! ;D
*Quote from Gone With the Wind by Margaret Mitchell
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