Chapter 16 : Arguments
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The strange behaviour all started in Potions where James was being uncharacteristically helpful and friendly towards me:
“Your potion’s looking good, Vi!” he said rather enthusiastically.
“Erm… thanks?” I asked, staring down into the gloopy contents of my cauldron.
“James, are you feeling alright?”
“Yeah, why, do I look ill?”
“No, but, well don’t you think you’re acting a little… odd?” I asked awkwardly.
“Not at all! Besides, wouldn’t you rather I act happy instead of the way I have been over the last few months?”
“Well, naturally, of course, but it’s a bit weird. Has something happened?”
“No, nothing.” He said, shuffling, his eyes diverting ahead guiltily. At first I didn’t realise what he was looking at, but it didn’t take long to find out. Claire Summers was now staring at James whilst batting her eyelashes. Shit. Not her again. This worst part was that James was looking back at her, smiling, before turning back to me and ‘casually’ mentioning:
“Oh yeah, just so you know… Claire and I are back together.”
No. This is not happening. How the hell could he be so inconsiderate and naïve; did he actually believe that Claire liked him? It was obvious that she just wanted him for his status, the stupid cow. Anger was now boiling up inside of me but I chose to refrain from exploding and just replied with a “That’s nice.”
“Wait, so you’re alright with it, then?” asked James, looking surprised.
“Whatever. I mean, it’s not like your actions concern me,” I said bitterly, angry tears subtly stinging my eyes as I determinedly stared forwards to avoid eye-contact as the bell rang to signal the ned of the lesson.
“Ah, come on Vi, don’t be like that!” exclaimed James as I hurried ahead out of the classroom.
“Vi! VI!” he shouted, running after me, leaving an annoyed-looking Claire huffing off in the opposite direction.
“Vi! Just stop for a second,” he said breathlessly, following me into an empty classroom.
“What the fuck do you want, James?”
“I don’t want anything, I just don’t know why you’re reac-”
“MERLIN, JAMES! ARE YOU ACTUALLY AS THICK AS YOU’RE LETTING ON? DO YOU HONESTLY THINK I’D BE FINE WITH YOU GOING OUT WITH A STUPID BITCH WHO ONLY WANTS YOU FOR YOUR MONEY AND FAME, ESPECIALLY WHEN I’M HAVING YOUR BABY IN TWO MONTHS! DID YOU REALLY EXPECT ME TO BE OKAY WITH THIS?!”
“NO, NOT PLEASE! YOU’RE RIDICULOUS; YOU DON’T CARE ABOUT ANYBODY OTHER THAN YOURSELF! YOU’RE A MEAN, SELFISH, IDIOTIC LITTLE BOY!”
“Viola! Don’t you think you’re being a bit hypocritical, I mean you’re going out with my brother, for goodness’ sake!”
“BUT THAT’S DIFFERENT, JAMES! ALBUS LOVES ME AND HAS PROMISED TO SUPPORT ME, WHICH HE WOULDN’T HAVE TO DO IF IT WEREN’T FOR YOU BEING SUCH A SELF-ABSORBED BASTARD!”
“For fuck’s sake Viola, Claire’s just a girlfriend, she’s not going to change anything! You’re just over-reacting!”
“WHAT? ALRIGHT THEN, WHY DON’T YOU TRY BEING 17 AND CARRYING THE CHILD OF SOMEONE WHO DOESN’T GIVE A SHIT ABOUT YOU?! WHY DON’T YOU TRY GETTING A JOB AND RAISING A BABY WITHOUT THE OTHER PARENT? BECAUSE, JAMES, IN REALITY, THAT IS WHAT IS GOING TO HAPPEN TO ME AND IT’S ALL BECAUSE OF YOU! I HATE YOU!” I screamed at his stunned face.
“Viola, I never said anything about leaving you alone with raising the kid.”
“SO? THAT’S WHAT YOU’VE BEEN IMPLYING FOR ALL THIS TIME! I MEAN, WHAT SORT OF FATHER CHOOSES QUIDDITCH OVER THEIR FIRST-BORN CHILD?”
“BUT THIS IS WHAT I’VE BEEN TRYING TO TELL EVERYONE, VI! I’M NOT READY TO BE A ‘FATHER’! I’M NOT READY FOR ALL THE ARGUMENTS, CUSTODY ARRANGEMENTS, MONEY ISSUES AND EVERY OTHER DAMN THING THAT’S GOING TO HAPPEN!” shouted James, his voice wavering.
“WELL THEN YOU KNOW WHAT TO DO, DON’T YOU? YOU KNOW AS WELL AS I DO THAT YOU DON’T HAVE TO HANG AROUND! BESIDES, ANY KID WOULD BE BETTER OFF WITH NO FATHER RATHER THAN YOU!”
“FINE!” shouted James, storming out of the room.
“FINE!” I replied, crying. Merlin, my hormones were really out of control.
I returned to my dorm almost immediately after the argument and flopped on to my bed, bitter, crying and confused. I’d never meant to get so angry at James, but I guess months upon months of building anger and frustration towards him had to be released at some point. I tried to get some homework done before dinner but my mind was in overdrive and my concentration levels were lax. I just couldn’t stop thinking about James and the way he’d stormed out of the room; it was like his voice was on constant replay in my mind, causing me to relive James final words and expressions. Was this really it? Was he actually okay with leaving his kid because of our argument? Then again, it was probably for the best; if James wasn’t going to fight for his child now, he probably never would.
Dinner that night was a strange affair; Joanna and Becca left early to finish off some Defence Against the Dark Arts homework, leaving me sat on my own due to the fact that Al was sitting with Scorpius at the far end of the table. Not only did this leave me alone, but it also left a significant gap in-front of me, giving me a perfect view of the other house tables. However, only one in particular interested me- the Gryffindor table. I could see the back of James’s and Claire’s heads and they were very close together; too close if you ask me. Every so often, James’s head would turn as if to look at me, but he kept trying to disguise it as a casual glance around the room. He didn’t look sad, but he didn’t look particularly happy either. Claire, on the other hand, looked absolutely ecstatic as she flirted with her boyfriend and rested her head on his shoulder. I wasn’t overly jealous, just annoyed that James seemed to want to choose her over his baby; he seemed to think that I was the one in the wrong for ‘thrusting’ this upon him, but in my opinion, he was the wrong one.
I could also see Rose sitting opposite James, multi-tasking between reading a heavy-looking book and eating her roast pork. Every now and again, she could be seen looking up and James and Claire with a look of disapproval on her face. Well, at least some one in this room was on my side. After about ten minutes of miserably playing with the pork on my plate, I decided I’d had enough and that I really ought to go to bed.
As was walking across the common room and towards the dormitories, I felt someone push past me, then turn around.
“Oh, it’s you Vi! Sorry, I didn’t mean… kind of angry,” said a breathless-looking Al.
“It’s alright,” I muttered, turning to walk away.
“No, no it’s not alright, have you heard about James?”
“What about him?” I enquired nonchalantly.
“About him and Claire!”
“Oh right, yeah.”
“Merlin, I’m so sorry for getting annoyed at you, Vi; I was being stupid about the whole surname thing… but anyway, I’m guessing James dumped the news on you himself, judging by his guilty expression when I asked him where you’d gone.”
“Well, sort of, but it was pretty obvious from Claire’s smugness in Potions earlier that something was going on.”
“Hm. Anyway, are you alright? I mean, what James has done is just so… immature and selfish. Merlin, he can be an idiot when he chooses to be.”
“Tell me about it. I don’t really know what to think at the moment, to be honest. It’s not that I’m jealous of Claire or anything,” I said as Al pulled a concerned-then-relaxed face, “I’m more angry about James’s behaviour in general, and his lack to put things into perspective. I actually had a massive go at him earlier about it all, but to be honest, it just made things worse,” I said, my voice cracking as my eyes filled with tears.
“Viola, are you alright? What did he say?” asked Al frantically, leading me into a small, deserted corner of the common room.
“I’m fine,” I said, a tear streaming down my cheek.
“Well you’re clearly not, are you? Just have a tissue and tell me what he said, Vi,” said Al kindly, handing me a tissue.
“Well I shouted at him and we had a-a massive ar-argument and I t-told him that the b-baby would b-be better off w-without him and then h-he he shouted ‘fine’ and w-walked off.” I said, now sobbing, causing a group of first-years to look over at me, but I couldn’t possibly care less.
“Are you serious? He didn’t even put up a fight?” asked Al, looking concerned.
“Well… I’m not very good at this whole comforting thing, but you know I’m here for you if you ever need me right? Besides, I’m your boyfriend,” he said gently to me, making me smile, “Well anyway, you look like you really need a sleep.”
“Yeah,” I chuckled, “I think I’m going to go to bed now.”
“Alright, but are you sure you’re okay?”
“Honestly Al, life’s only going to get tougher, this is just the beginning, but thanks anyway,” I said, smiling slightly and giving him a kiss before retiring to my dormitory.
A/N: I would just like to apologise for the long delay between this chapter and its predecessor; I've just been so incredibly busy with school and everytime I've tried to write, I've just gotten a massive writer's block, argh! Also, I'm sorry about the short chapter, but I prmoise the next one will be longer. Thanks again and please review if you have anything you want to say/ask me :)
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