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Get in Line by dobbyismyhero22
Chapter 4 : Death To Cats Everywhere
Rating: MatureChapter Reviews: 19

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chapter image that I'm absolutely infatuated with of the gorgeous Rose Weasley by the very talented sanadamaiko 

“Why the hell does Walker have an ungodly amount of Acid Pops tucked in his bedside table?” I glanced up from my business of dragging Scorpius’ trunk from the closet to see James pointing to Mitch’s drawer that I knew contained at least three dozen acid pops in a variety of flavors. 


You see, Silas has this weird habit of waking up half asleep in the middle of the night with a sweet tooth. He basically sleepwalks and starts rummaging through everyone’s stuff until he finds candy. This has been going on for nearly six years now but it wasn’t until last year that the rest of the boys got sick of it and tried to sabotage their friend. Scorpius has every disgusting flavor of Bertie Bott’s there is and Cyrus has at least four pounds Cockroach Clusters shoved in his drawer. 


Silas doesn’t even realize anything off until he wakes up in the morning with a hole burnt through his tongue, a horrifying taste in his mouth, and a terrible stomachache. We Slytherins believe that tough love is the answer to every situation. 


“Why the hell did you insist on coming with me if you’re not even going to help?” I countered irritably, not answering his question, as I popped open the latches and flopped to the floor.  


“Oh you mean with your job of moving a few shirts around to get the earrings?” He inquired with a roll of his eyes and roughly shut the drawer. “I didn’t realize that such a small task required two people, but I guess for you it does.” 


I shot a glare in his direction causing him to smirk as he sat down on the edge of Mitch’s bed. It was the night before the plan that we now called ‘The Ellie Project’ because so much of ruining Scorpius and Rose’s happiness together involved the poor girl. 


The boys had detention again and Hazel had a massive amount of Ancient Runes homework that she was busying herself in the library with so we figured tonight would be the perfect night to steal the earrings to complete our plan for the next day. 


James already made the love potion using a bit of Ellie’s hair that he found in her dorm and I was able to con my favorite house elf, Georgie, into spiking it into Scorpius’ morning bowl of oatmeal. Getting Georgie to do anything for me was quite simple. All I have to do is slip him a few butterbeers when no one is watching and it’s like he’s my personal slave. I think the little guy has a drinking problem, but he’s too useful to me to go seek him help. 


Everything seemed to be going perfectly, but as this was my life, something, of course, had to go wrong. As I got to the bottom where the earrings had been exactly three days ago, I realized that all that was there were his green and silver striped ties. “We might have a problem,” I mumbled just loud enough for him to hear me. 


“What kind of problem?” James asked absentmindedly as he was keeping himself entertained by shooting blue and orange sparks out of his wand. 


“The earrings are gone.” I sighed frustratedly, rubbing my temples, after triple checking the trunk.


“What do you mean they’re gone?” He questioned moronically and the sparks he was making fizzled out. 


“How can I explain it differently to you?” I huffed, raising an eyebrow at his stupidity. “The earrings are gone, as in, they aren’t here.” 


“Nice going, Moseley.” He commented sardonically. “You’ve managed to screw up over fifty percent of The Ellie Project before it was even set into motion. Very nice.” 


“Oh, so this is somehow my fault?” I snapped back, jumping to my feet, but he held up a finger to silence me. 


“Footsteps,” He muttered in barely a whisper and my eyes widened as I heard them getting closer. I whipped around and sent all of Scorpius’ clothes flying back into his trunk and back into its rightful place. Then I realized that James bloody Potter was still standing beside me and my heart nearly failed when I considered what would happened if any one of my friends were to walk through the door. 


They’d all react badly to say the least but Silas would probably shit himself twice and then be fully convinced that James kidnapped me into showing him all of Slytherin’s quidditch secrets. 


“Why in the fuck are you just standing there? Hide!” I ordered and frantically tried pushing him to the closet. 


James rolled his eyes and threw a smirk on his face. “I have an invisibility cloak for a reason.” He reminded and threw it on a split second before the door opened to reveal a tired looking Cyrus. 


He seemed highly taken aback to see me standing, seemingly alone, in the middle of his dorm with no apparent reason for being there. 


“What’s up?” I tried feebly, trying to seem at least somewhat casual and I watched as he closed the door behind him. My stomach dropped when I realized that that had been James’ only hope of sneaking out of the room without being noticed.


“Mose? What are you doing here?” He asked in a puzzled tone and loosened his tie as he always did after he got back to his dorm after a long night. 


To that, I didn’t have a response and this was one of the first times in my life that I literally had no idea how I was going to pull something out of my ass and bullshit my way out of this one, especially because the little bastard could typically see right through me. 


“Well,” I began and an idea suddenly sparked in my head involving one of the things that Cyrus would never question too in depth when it came to me. “I figured Silas wouldn’t be back from detention for a while and what he doesn’t know won’t hurt him.” 


A little smile began to form at the corner of his lips as he seemed to be picking up what I wasn’t even sure I was putting down and, within a second, he had crossed the distance between us and was tugging at my waist to pull me to him. His mouth met mine and I found myself returning the kiss because a) Cyrus was damn good at snogging and he didn’t seem to lose any of his talent between when we cut things off last year and now, and b) because what the hell else was I supposed to do?


I internally started freaking out, wishing that there was some way that James was able to escape without drawing attention to himself but it’s not like Cyrus wouldn’t notice if the door was suddenly opened by no one. I kept trying to brainstorm ways to get out of the situation that I just landed myself in, but as he pushed me back toward his bed, I felt my mind grow fuzzier from the kiss and I knew I was in deep shit.


This is what I had come to in my life. Practically selling my body and dignity to my former fuck buddy as a way to cover my ass from getting caught snooping in my step-cousin’s things with none other than James Potter. My dad would be so proud. 


I felt the back of my knees hit the bed and Cyrus’ lips left my mouth to work on my neck instead while his hands found their way underneath my shirt. I stupidly did nothing to stop him and I knew I was about to lose myself. As soon as I was about to let out a moan as I felt him kiss the sensitive spot just below my ear, a flash of intense heat from the coin burned through the back pocket of my shorts. 


I came to my senses, realizing what I was doing and who was still in the room, and immediately shoved Cyrus off of me causing a confused look to spread across his face. “What’s wrong?” He asked in a husky tone that made me even more attracted to him. His light brown hair was a mess from my hands running through it and he watched as I sprang up from the bed, most likely looking mental. 


“I think Silas is coming up,” I lied as I adjusted my shirt that he had managed to push up to reveal part of my deep crimson bra, blushing deeply. 


He instantly knew something was off because I never blushed or acted flustered in anyway. It just didn’t happen. “He has to clean all of the boy’s toilets in the school and he was only on the second floor when I left him. He won’t be back for--” 


“He’s coming, trust me. We have sibling telepathy.” I invented wildly and avoided looking at his bright blue eyes that were most likely trying to read me like a book. 


“You’re not even actually related!” He called after me but I ignored him as I threw open the door widely, making sure James would be able to sneak out behind me. 


“Not one word, Potter,” I hissed under my breath as I all but flew from the room. The second we were out of Cyrus’ earshot, he busted up with the laughter that he had probably been holding in for the last ten minutes and I felt my jaw clench as I resisted the urge to avada kedavra him on the spot. 


He didn’t stop laughing even when we emerged in the common room, making it look like I was being followed by a particularly amused, invisible ghost. I heard Cassie make some snide comment to Astrid about me coming from the boy’s side and I shot her a murderous glare that shut even her up. 


As soon as we were out in corridor, I snatched the invisibility cloak off of James and shoved him behind an old fraying tapestry. I had a grip of the front of the front of his army green tee shirt in one of my hands and my wand in the other as I pushed him roughly against the wall. 


Although he looked amused, he wasn’t laughing anymore, but I should have realized that a laughing James Potter was better than a speaking James Potter. Actually, come to think of it, anything, including the image of Filch and Madam Pince doing it on a stack of books was better than a speaking James Potter. Trust me, it’s been seen. A second year is now in therapy because of it but he managed to snap a few pictures and it’s not a pretty sight. 


A sly grin spread itself on James’ face as he looked down and saw the way I was basically pressed against his body. “First Palmer and now me? Damn, Moseley, you certainly are getting around today, but I hate to break it to you, I’m not interested.”


“You’re repugnant,” I snapped, pushing him backward so his head hit the wall which unfortunately didn’t cause him to cry out in pain like I had hoped. 


“Hey, I’m not the one that was trying to force live pornography on others.” He replied with the smirk of his that made me want to simultaneously light myself on fire and snog the life out of him at the same time. 

“Are you mental?” I exclaimed, shoving him again and then taking a step away from him. “I wasn’t going to have sex with him.” 


“Could’ve had me fooled,” He drawled in a tone that was attempting to sound bored. “You didn’t exactly push him away, now did you?” 


“Do I detect a hint of jealousy?” I questioned, cocking my head to the side, just trying to piss him off at this point. 


“Don’t make me laugh, Moseley.” He scoffed predictably with a roll of his eyes. “If I wanted to be the one fucking you, I would be.”


His answer took me by surprise as well as angered me at how cocky he was which caused me to raise an eyebrow and retort with, “Why so sure, Potter?” 


He chose not to answer and instead took a step forward so that he was so close that I could count the light amount of freckles that were dusted on his nose if I wanted to. I didn’t break eye contact with him even when I watched as he started to lean in while I did nothing to stop him. My breath caught in my throat as the beating in my chest accelerated to a ridiculous pace. 


“Let’s just say I have my reasons.” He whispered with his lips less than an inch away from my own before pulling the tapestry back and strutting down the corridor with a certain arrogant spring in his step. 


The bastard knew he was one hundred percent right and I hated him for it. 



I woke up the next morning to the unpleasant surprise of Paula, Hazel’s demon cat that was the bane of my existence, jumping on my face. “Fucking shit,” I yelped and roughly threw her fat body off of me causing her land at the end of my bed, already in the position to spring again. 


She hissed menacingly with her evil yellow eyes staring at me with the deepest loathing and I hissed back. We had a complicated relationship, Paula and me, and more mornings than you’d think started off like this. She’s despised me since my total boss of an owl, Tyrion, tried to carry her away and eat her when was only a kitten. Paula then blamed Tyrion’s actions on me and responded by puking in my shoes whenever she got the chance causing me to reciprocate her hatred.  


She was getting ready to strike at my face again but this time I saw her claws out in preparation to stick in my eye sockets. I pounced forward and grabbed her around the middle before she could even blink. She started hissing again, wriggling in my hands, and clawing at the air, desperate to break free. 


I did what always did which was toss her in the shower, turn on the water, and then run out and slam the door before she came charging at me trying to bite off my ankles. Astrid and Cassie had already left for breakfast and Izzy stirred slightly from her awkward sleeping position but immediately went back to sleep with a soft snore. 


Hazel walked into the room, already dressed and in her uniform, with her arms full of books from her early morning study session at the library with her dark brown hair back in a pretty braid. She knew as soon as she saw the shut bathroom door and the self satisfied grin on my face. 


She gave a sigh, letting her books fall onto her bed, and shot me a look as she opened up the bathroom door to unleash the evil behind it. Paula emerged and began mewing innocently like the little bint that she is and started rubbing her wet body against her owner’s ankles. Hazel bent down, cooing slightly, to pick her up and Paula purred satisfiedly once she was in her arms. “I don’t understand what you have against her. She’s so sweet.”


I watched as the devil spawn nuzzled deeper into my best friend. “That’s just what she wants you to think,” I insisted earnestly causing Hazel to roll her eyes. 

“Are you ready for breakfast?” She asked, gently putting Paula back down on the floor. 


“Do I look like I’m ready?” I replied dully, gesturing to the usual outfit that I typically fell asleep in which was nothing but my knickers and one of the boys’ old quidditch shirts that I managed to steal. 


“Well hurry up, the guys are waiting downstairs,” She ordered, tossing my clothes at me so they smacked me in the face, probably still bitter at the fact that I tried trapping her cat in the bathroom. 


It suddenly hit me though that it was the morning of the final part of The Ellie Project and I threw on my uniform at a record pace so I could follow Hazel down to the common room where the boys were lounging across the best armchairs by the fire. 


“Bloody hell, finally,” Silas sighed in relief, jumping up in excitement.


My step brother gets excited over the simple things in life. Quidditch, the thought of naked girls, and breakfast foods are among them. 


“We would’ve been down sooner but Mose decided that trying to murder my cat was more important than being on time.” Hazel explained rather inaccurately, shooting me a very pointed look that confirmed my suspicions that she was not entirely happy with me. 


“Oh please,” I snorted, rolling my eyes. “She had it coming.” 


“Well maybe I should sneak into the Owlery after breakfast and start ripping off Tyrion’s feathers to see how he’d like it,” She barked and I strongly contemplated strangling her.


Typically Hazel and I got on beautifully but neither of us liked when people fucked with our pets and we unfortunately both hated each other’s pets so it caused a riff every so often in our friendship. 


I was about to retort with something along the lines of ‘if you ever touch my owl then I’ll feed your cat to the giant squid and laugh maliciously as I do so’ but Mitch cut across by saying, “Now, now, ladies, let’s not fight.” 


He threw an arm around each of us and pulled us into him from either side with the corners of his lips turned up in a wicked manner. “Unless, of course, you’re wearing bikinis and there is mud involved.” He suggested causing the rest of the boys to laugh with the exception of Silas while Hazel and I both ripped his arms off of us. 


“In your dreams, Walker.” I laughed and then, not so lightly, punched him on the arm.  


“I’m not opposed to jello either.” Mitch replied easily with a grin. 


“I find it incredible that you’ve never had the shit slapped out of you before,” Hazel muttered, shaking her head, as she made her way out of the common room. 


“Hazel, dear, it really does wound me when you pretend that you hate me,” Mitch called after her, making her pause in the doorway to turn around and raise an eyebrow. 


“Who says I’m pretending?” She countered but with a mischievous smirk that got Mitch to crack a smile and go running after her. 


“I’m just waiting for the day that she finally admits that she’s in love with him.” Scorpius sighed in a bored tone as we followed sluggishly behind. 


“He needs to pull his head out of his ass first.” Cyrus mumbled in agreement. 


“Amen to that,” Silas and I muttered in unison. 


The Hazel/Mitch story was a frustrating one. Basically, Hazel has never admitted to even thinking he’s attractive (which he is) but it’s obvious to anyone with eyes (pretty much Silas, Cyrus, Scorpius, and me) that she’s had a massive crush on him since third year. We never tried to interfere, which is very uncharacteristic of us, because we know that she’ll deny it, go all red, and then refuse to be in the same room as him for the rest of her life. 


Mitch also poses a problem in the whole situation because, well, he’s a straight up dumbass. He doesn’t really have the qualities Hazel wants in a boyfriend yet she inexplicably seems to have strange infatuation with him that he doesn’t realize at all. While Mitch is somehow one of the best in our year, with the exception of Potions, he is probably the daftest kid I’ve ever met. He’s not exactly the ‘relationship’ type of guy and spends more time talking about the girls he’s bedded than he does breathing. Hazel’s not one to want to just sleep with him either because she’s the only one out of us that’s still a virgin. 


Cyrus lost his virginity to me toward the end of fifth year, which is partially why Cassie hates me so much. She had been trying to have sex with him the entire time they were dating but he wouldn’t give it up. 


Mitch lost his to the aforementioned Bertha which he doesn’t like to discuss for good reason. 


Scorpius had sex for the first time with one of my cousins, which is weird considering I think of him as family. Annie, who graduated a couple years ago, was staying at my house for a few weeks while her parents were out of town during the summer after his fourth year. Scorpius came by for a simple, jolly visit and left a new man. Looking back, Annie was a going into her seventh year at the time so it’s actually pretty fucking creepy that she slept with someone two years younger than her. 


Silas was the only one out of us that was in an actual relationship when he gave up his innocence during the beginning of sixth year. It was with his first and only girlfriend, Cora Martin. She was a Hufflepuff, which was something we teased him endlessly for although the boys eventually stopped when they found out he was getting laid consistently. Cora was sweet enough but once when she was drunk she let it slip that secretly hated quidditch. Silas, being Silas, ended things the next day. 


By the time we reached the Great Hall, Mitch and Hazel were already in our normal spot at the Slytherin table. Hazel was cracking up at something Mitch said which caused me to exchange knowing, smirk-filled looks with the rest of the guys. 


I chose my seat carefully and settled down at the spot directly across from Scorpius where I could see the Gryffindor table behind him. My eyes found James and I saw that he was discretely looking in our direction. He gave a slight, subtle nod to show that everything was going according to plan so far. 


It was actually quite beautiful that Scorpius is literally the only person in Hogwarts that enjoyed the house elves’ repulsive excuse for oatmeal because otherwise we’d have to worry about making half the school fall in love with Ellie Markes. 


“Silas, what the hell is all over your hands?” Hazel gasped, noticing that his palms were a shocking shade of bright blue when he reached across her to pour himself some coffee. 


“It’s the fucking cleaning shit for the toilets.” Silas responded bitterly, adding five spoonfuls of sugar to his mug. “I think my hands are permanently stained.”


“It looks like you helped wank off a Smurf,” Mitch laughed mockingly causing me to snort into my tea in amusement and Silas to flick some of his scrambled egg across the table at him. 


“Hey, you deserve to get made fun of after you got back at three in the morning and woke me up,” Mitch reasoned and flicked the egg straight back which hit my brother right between the eyes. 


“Wow Si, you didn’t get done till three?” Cyrus commented in a voice that was almost too suddenly interested. “Hear that Mose?” He added in a low voice causing my stomach to drop and I had a strong urge to take my fork that was currently stabbing a pancake and instead stab it through his thigh. 


The thing about Cyrus was that he loved proving people wrong which was exactly what he was trying to do except that right now was simply not the time and place. 


I saw Hazel raise an eyebrow suspiciously and after swallowing the bite of food that I was trying to digest, I managed to come up with a typical Jordan Moseley response and muttered nonchalantly with a shrug to Silas, “Sucks to suck.” 


“Thank you for the sympathy, darling sister,” Silas grumbled sarcastically while tiredly rubbing his eyes.


I could feel Cyrus watching me but I was watching Scorpius. He was halfway through his bowl of oatmeal and his silver eyes, much to my satisfaction, were beginning to look a bit hazy. 


He was being quiet, which isn’t saying much considering he only talked when he deemed it necessary, but even for him it was off. 


I barely registered anything that anyone was saying and instead studied his every move, waiting for something to happen. After he finished eating, he put down his spoon and just stared at the wall behind my head as if in a daze and I tried not to grin at how well the plan was going. His eyes looked completely clouded over and he suddenly stood up so quickly that he nearly knocked over his goblet of orange juice when his hips hit the table, taking everyone by surprise. 


“Something wrong, Scorp?” Hazel questioned, looking up at him curiously and I pressed my lips together in a flat line to keep the smile off my face. 


“I’ve made a mistake,” He muttered almost robotically, more to himself than anyone, and then went charging out of the room. 


“What the hell is the matter with him?” Cyrus asked, craning his neck to watch his retreating figure. 


“He probably realized he forgot to add a punctuation mark on an essay,” Silas snorted, adding in an eye roll, which the others deemed as a likely reason when it came to Scorpius. I, on the other hand, wanted to go watch as shit went down. 


“I’m going to head to the loo.” I stated abruptly and swung my school bag over my shoulder. “I’m feeling a bit sick. I’ll see you lot in Charms.” 


“I hope you’re not preggers. Morning sickness is a bitch, I hear.” Mitch commented while popping a piece of sausage in his mouth as I got up from the table. He then clamped Cyrus on the back and said, “Congrats on fatherhood, buddy!” 


This in turn caused Cyrus to nearly start choking on his fruit and for Silas to whack Mitch upside the head. “Oh fuck you,” I growled at him and threw a slice of toast at his face before walking away. 


“Don’t blow chunks all over the hallway!” He called after me and I flicked him off behind my back, picking up the pace so I didn’t get too far behind wherever Scorpius was going. 


As soon as I stepped foot in the corridor, James appeared out of thin air from underneath his invisibility cloak and it was one of the first times that I wasn’t taken by surprise by it. “He went this way,” He said and took off in the direction that Scorpius was supposedly headed. 


I felt almost giddy like a little kid on Christmas morning. The last diabolical plan that I had like this had involved peanut butter, one of Ava’s partially evil nannies, and some vomit flavored Bertie Botts beans. Needless to say, it didn’t exactly go how I wanted so I was a bit more than thrilled that The Ellie Project seemed to be going according to plan. 


I ended up passing him in my excitement and he trailed closely behind but it wasn’t until we got to the corridor that lead to the Gryffindor common room that we heard Scorpius’ thudding footsteps ahead. 


Without saying a word, James suddenly gripped my arm and pulled me to him so swiftly that I couldn’t help but let out a surprised squeak. My back slammed into his chest and within a second he threw the cloak over our heads, making us completely invisible. 


“Well move along then,” He ordered in a low voice with his lips so close that I felt them brush against my ear. I felt a wave of fury hit me that I cured by slamming my foot down on his. 


James hissed in pain which greatly satisfied me. “Give me a fucking warning next time,” I all but snarled back at him but I shuffled forward nonetheless. 


“As you wish, princess,” He growled sarcastically and I could just imagine the eye roll that I was almost one hundred percent sure he was doing. 


Scorpius came into view in front of us as we quickened our pace while Rose, as if on cue, came around the corner with a bag that was bulging full of books swung over her shoulder. Her eyes widened significantly when she saw my cousin practically running toward her with a most likely crazed look in his eyes. 


“Scorpius, what are you--” Rose began, looking completely taken aback and she started glancing around her to see if anyone was around. 


“I need the earrings back,” He answered abruptly and slightly out of breath. 


“Are you having some sort of fit?” She asked in a concerned voice that made me want to gag as she pressed the back of hand against his forehead to see if he had a temperature. 


James must’ve shared my feelings on the matter because I could hear him make some soft retching sounds behind me. 


“Rose, just stop!” Scorpius snapped, clearly exasperated, and swatted her hand away. She recoiled instantly and a hurt expression overtook her face. 


“This is going better than expected,” James muttered in my ear, sounding pleased with himself. While I was pleased too, the only thing I could suddenly focus on was how close were currently were. His unfairly muscular chest was pressed against my back so I could feel it every time he even took a breath. My brain started to think very dirty thoughts that involved what it would feel like to have a certain part of his male anatomy inside of me. 


What? I’m a hormone filled teenage girl and he was James fucking Potter. Sue me. 


I quickly banished the semi tempting idea out of my head and instead directed my attention back to Scorpius and Rose. 


“S, what’s going on?” Rose questioned, looking up at him with confused eyes as she tucked a lock of her strawberry hair behind her ear. 


Scorpius, seeming very distracted, refused to even spare her a glance. His face still had that vague dreamy like look to it but his voice was void of all emotion when he told her, “There’s someone else.” 


I didn’t stop the massive grin that spread across my face when I saw Rose’s suddenly furious expression. “What do you mean someone else?” 


“I’m in love with someone else.” Scorpius admitted with the dreaminess effect now seeping into the sound of his voice while his eyes almost completely clouded over. “He’s my everything.” 


“Did he say he?” James croaked from behind me and my jaw literally dropped open because he most definitely said he. 


He?” Rose cried somewhat hysterically, but it was evident that she now was trying to hold back laughter. The daft girl was finally catching on that something was up and I was now a mixture of somewhat horrified and extremely confused because unless I was mistaken, Ellie was most definitely a girl. 


Scorpius shot Rose a deeply annoyed look and Rose managed to regain composure. “I’m happy for you, S.” She insisted earnestly, attempting just to go with it for his sake. “How did you meet him?” 


“Well, I haven’t actually met him yet,” Scorpius explained, now excited in an almost giddy way as if he was a preteen girl talking about his schoolyard crush. “I was going to introduce myself but I didn’t want to show up empty handed. That’s why I need the earrings. I think he’ll love them.” 


My poor friend was positively gushing at this point and Rose had this amused look on her face yet there was something soft about it as if she found everything that he was saying completely endearing and adorable. 


It made me want to vomit but James and I could only watch in total horror as our semi brilliant plan fell to shit right in front of our eyes. 


“How about I give you back the earrings and introduce you to him?” She proposed and Scorpius’ entire face lit up in pure happiness. 


“You would do that for me?” He gasped, looking sincerely touched as if Rose was the best person on the bloody planet with the exception of the fucking mystery bloke that wasn’t even supposed to exist. 


Like Scorpius dresses nicely and enjoys soap operas more than the average bloke but he was in no way, shape, or form gay. 


“Of course,” Rose beamed while Scorpius attacked her with a tight, joyful hug that made James and I both grip our hair in frustration at how horribly The Ellie Project was going. After Scorpius let her go, she asked the question we had all been dying to know, “What’s the lucky guy’s name?” 


“Jasper,” Scorpius breathed, sounding like he was in daze. 


“Ellie’s cat?” Rose squeaked in both shock and complete and utter amusement. 


James just kind of snorted but I couldn’t tell if it was a bit of laughter or frustration. I, on the other hand, nearly choked on my own spit. 


“Do you know him?” Scorpius asked, instantly perking up even more than he already was. 


“Know him? I live with him and he’s an absolute catch. Let’s go,” She said in a very chippy voice with an earnest, pearly white smile that showed off both her dimples and made me grit my teeth together. 


She won ‘Best Smile’ in Hogwarts’ bullshit school newspaper and her smile was the reason that half the imbecilic blokes in our school were love with her. 


Rose took his arm and led him down the corridor while Scorpius nervously fiddled with his hair, asking her if it looked okay and if she thought that Jasper would like it. 


A split second after they turned the corner, I ripped the invisibility cloak off of our heads and immediately rounded on James. “What the fuck did you do?” I practically screeched, absolutely seething at how terribly the whole thing went. 


“How was I supposed to know that it was cat hair in the brush?” He shrugged nonchalantly as if his mistake didn’t screw up the entire thing and I wanted to suffocate him with my bare hands. 


“You gave me so much shit for the earrings yet you basically just blew The Ellie Project to hell,” I ranted furiously, shoving him backward causing him to stumble a bit and he had the audacity to laugh


“Calm down, Moseley.” He said patronizingly, adding in an eyeroll as if I was overreacting. “It’s kind of funny when you think about it.” 


“Oh yeah, it’s just down right hilarious.” I scoffed sardonically, shooting him a glare that could kill an entire army of Death Eaters. “I’m sure they’ll have a nice giggle fest about it later when they’re fucking.” 


James looked highly taken aback by that and made a noise that resembled a choking animal. “You don’t think that they are having sex, do you?” He questioned, suddenly incredibly concerned. He absentmindedly ran a hand through his hair as a sign of his worry and if I didn’t currently despise him so much it would’ve made me even more attracted to him. 


“He’s Scorpius Malfoy,” I pointed out duly. “Of course they are having sex.” 


“What the hell does that even mean?” He sputtered with his hands pressed anxiously against his head. It was the first time I had ever seen him even the least bit unhinged. He apparently didn’t like the thought of his baby cousin slagging about. 


“It means that Scorpius has an eight pack and a face that could cure cancer.” I explained. “He would be able to convince a nun to get into bed with him.” 


Scorpius was in no way a man whore. He had standards and has only slept with two girls other than now most likely Rose but James looked like he might be sick and I took a certain pleasure in that so I let him continue to think that Scorpius was a womanizing monster. 


“We have to break them up,” James stated seriously as if that wasn’t our plan all along. 


“No shit, Sherlock, since you fucked up this plan.” I huffed with just a touch of bitterness. He opened his mouth to argue with something most likely extremely stupid but I cut him off before he could start. “New method: We stalk.”


He thought about it for a moment before giving me a slight nod of his head in consideration. “Go on.”


“We don’t let them out of our sight.” I explained. “I don’t like the thought of them hooking up any more than you do so we don’t give them a chance. We follow them wherever they go and fuck shit up if they get too close to each other.” 


A smirk formed on his lips that told me that he liked the idea. “Let’s bloody do it. What have we got to lose?” 


A/N: Hiiiiiii, so this took a bit longer than expected and I apologize for that. For the record, I had like 4000 words of this typed for like months but then I just got really caught up with university starting and I just haven’t had a ton of time to write. I hope the length of this made up for it because, if I’m not mistaken, it’s the second longest chapter I’ve ever written. So yay. 


What’d you guys think? Did you like it? Please let me know in a review because reviews are absolutely lovely. I have some of the next chapter done already and I love it to pieces already so I’m excited to get that done. SHIT HAPPENS IN THE NEXT CHAPTER. Well sort of. Kind of. It’s hard to describe. You’ll just have to read to find out. 


Okay rant over. I do have one question though? What do you lot think of Cyrus?

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