Chapter 31 : Going over things
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Draco stepped forward, ‘’what?’’
Hermione felt herself starting to tremble, ‘’we were together before the accident.’’ She closed her eyes.
‘’I don’t believe you.’’ he snarled.
Hermione took a step back, of course he wouldn’t believe me, I have no evi-wait! Hermione smiled and ran into her room, leaving a bewildered Draco.
She quickly emerged from her room, holding the slightly burnt photo album turned memory book.
‘’If you don’t believe me, have a look at these pictures…pictures don’t lie.’’ Hermione opened it, skipping the first few pages about his brother, another time. She passed Draco the book as he sat down.
Draco looked at the first set of pictures, they were all of them two together, acting all ‘couply’. Thoughts were racing through his mind. He carried on flicking through the pages, watching the moving photo’s when he came across one of Draco planting a kiss on Hermione’s lips, as they we’re tangled up in bed sheets. Draco looked up at the pale girl in front of him,
‘’did we?’’ he nodded towards the picture.
Hermione nodded, not wanting to say anything.
Draco stiffened, ‘’how many times?’’
Hermione started to think, she unfolded a finger for every time they did it.
Draco watched in horror as Hermione’s fingers kept rising. They didn’t stop until she counted seven.
Seven times…what the hell was I thinking?
‘’Did I call you by your first name?’’ This was the main question for him, if he did, he knew he was serious.
Hermione hesitated, then nodded once more.
Draco’s eyes went wide, he buried his head in his hands. He was thoroughly confused.
‘’I could show you the memories if you would like?’’ Hermione spoke, barely audible.
Draco nodded, he didn’t know how to react, how to respond. Maybe…maybe these will help me understand.
Hermione got the pensive out and racked her brains to figure out what memory she should do first. When she figured it out, she put the tip of her wand on her temple and withdrew it, dipping it into the pensive and watched as the clear liquid became splattered with black spots.
Hermione and Draco both put their heads by the pensive, and next thing they knew they were in the common room at night time, Hermione had chosen the first time they kissed:
Hermione and Draco followed the memory Hermione down the stairs and into the broom cupboard,
* there was a sigh, then felt warm hands on her cheeks. He made her way to her mouth and she closed her eyes. She placed her arms around his back, and kissed back. He glided his tongue across her bottom lip asking permission for entry, and she opened her mouth for her welcoming.
Draco cringed as he watched himself snog Hermione sensuously, Hermione looked down in embarrassment.
Soon after, the chime rang again, letting them know it was over, she felt a rush of disappointment, not wanting it to end. She made her way onto the first step, and forgot to duck her head, when she banged the top of her head.
‘’Hermione?!’’ Hermione giggled at Draco’s response.
‘’No, this cannot be happening.’’ She looked towards the dark figure, who was now pacing back and forth with his face in his hands. ‘’before you say anything, don’t worry, I WONT tell anyone.’’
‘’Good! Like I would want anyone to know I kissed you! A mudbl-Gryffindor!’’ He said, storming up the stairs leaving her.
Hermione raised her eyebrow, she didn’t notice he went to call her a you-know-what before. She turned towards real draco and saw no expression on his face.
She stood there, feeling stupid. she stormed up the stairs, and into the girls side of the room. She opened the door, ignoring all the comments and questions, defiantly ignoring Ginny’s comments, and made her way back to the dorm. Climbing up the stairs, she started to cry, screaming out in frustration,
‘’AHH! WHY HIM?! ANYONE ONE, BUT BLOODY MALFOY. AHHH’’ she loosened her hair as she climbed into the common room, kicked off her heels, and went up to her bedroom. Lying down in her bed, not bothering to take off her makeup or get changed, and started to sob.*
Real Draco laughed at Hermione’s response to the kiss,
‘’what? I was angry, I didn’t want to kiss you at the time.’’ Hermione said straightforwardly.
The memory quickly ended and Hermione put in another, they were transported back to the ‘I’ve changed speech’, no words or looks where shared as Hermione was ready to battle with her emotions, and Draco could sense something was going to happen.
*‘’What did you really dream about?’’ he raised one eyebrow.
‘’Why do you care?’’ let’s see how he responds to that?
‘’don’t answer my question with another question! And I don’t care, Im just intrigued, you have helped me these past two months, I owe you, and I don’t like owing people, so, this is me, paying you back.’’ Hopefully that persuaded her.
‘’It doesn’t matter. I think, it’s just this place, with all the bad memories here.’’ Something switched in Hermione, remembering all the bad memories; she was engulfed with anger and sadness. ‘’wherever I walk, I can place a death of someone I know. I didn’t even want to come back here, but something inside me told me I had to go, for a reason. I don’t know what that reason was. It’s just…eurgh,’’ she sighed, ‘’ I feel like I can’t do anything right. I try and please people, everyone, help them, change for them, nothing’s ever right.’’ Tears started to blur her vision, causing Hermione to knock and spill over her mug of hot chocolate. With the hot liquid touching her skin, she winced. ‘’I can’t even keep this stupid liquid steady in my hands. Everything I do is wrong. Everything.’’
Draco got up, muttered a spell to clean up the mess. ‘’I know how you feel.’’
How, how could you, of all people know how I feel. Why do you even bother to care. Hermione could feel the anger overtaking the sadness in her, it was too much to handle. ’Do you? do you honestly know how I feel? To walk around, naming people who died for you, being tormented still, even after what I done. To be still branded a Mudblood.’’ Draco winced. Hermione’s voiced was raised. ‘’ im still being called a fucking Mudblood after the war. I’ve been tormented all of my wizarding life, and its torture. My parents…my parents don’t know who I am anymore. Before the war, I obliviated their memory so they were not in harm’s way. I went back in the summer, to find they were dead. DEAD. They died… they died in one of the silliest ways, do you know how they died?’’ Draco shook his head, stunned at Hermione’s sudden outburst. ‘’They died in a car accident. Someone went into the back of them, the car flipped, and they died. I didn’t even get to say goodbye to them. I have no one. Harry’s off with Ginny, and Ron, I lost Ron the moment I fell for him. All my life, I’ve been labelled. Even before I was a witch. I struggle to sleep at night because I fear my dreams will become a reality. I get up to 3 hours sleep, then I wake for you. I don’t even know why I wake for you. I get so scared. ‘’ tears started streaming out of her eyes. ‘’I hate being alone at night, im scared of getting hurt. Ive been hurt so much. Ron, my parents, Voldermort, your fucking aunt, and you.’’ she took her sleeve and wiped her eyes.
Draco sat there, frozen, still processing what Hermione had been saying, ‘’me?’’
Hermione sighed once more. ‘’Yes, you. All of the crap you gave me these past years, its left a scar. And now, I have an actual scar, and that just makes it worse. Merlin, it makes it a lot worse. I have to see it every day, and every day, it reminds me of what I am. ‘’
‘’I have one too you know.’’ Draco held the place where his dark mark is.
‘’Yes, I know. But, I don’t know anymore. Everyone just seems to have someone, and then there is me, the brightest witch of our age, lonely, and talking her heart out to someone that hates her.’’
Draco looked up at Hermione, hurt. I don’t hate you. I never have. ‘’I don’t hate you.’’
‘’Yes you do, ive seen the way you look at me.’’ Hermione put her head in her hands.
‘’It’s not hate.’’
‘’Oh, because Draco Malfoy doesn’t hate a mudblood.’’
‘’I told you, don’t say that word. I hate everything about it. ‘’
‘’Eurgh, im sorry.’’ She lifted her head from her hands, and looked at him in the eye.
‘’No, im the one who should apologise. For everything. I was stupid, and immature. I thought being a death eater would be fun. But I knew it was wrong the first moment I saw someone killed. I can’t even look at Dumbledore’s portrait outside, because It just reminds me of what I nearly done to him. Just look Hermione, I am, I am so sorry for everything ive ever done to you.’’
Hermione looked down, wait, did he just, no, he couldn’t of? ‘’Malfoy…’’
‘’You just called me Hermione.’’*
Hermione looked up at wide-eyed Draco as they were back in there common room. He was still processing all the new information. Then softly he spoke,
‘’can I see?’’ he looked at her arm.
Hermione looked down at her sleeved arm and slowly raised it, revealing the slightly puckered scar. Draco cringed at the sight.
‘’DRAAAKIIEEE’’ came a voice from inside Draco’s room,
‘’Shit, Parkinson. Im not finished yet Granger, im going to get rid of her, then I want you to show me others.’’
He turned around when the pair saw Pansy walk out of the room, only in her skimpy underwear, (skimpy was an understatement!)
‘’Drakie, why are you still talking to the mudblo-‘’
‘’don’t call her that Parkinson.’’ Draco told her sternly.
Hermione’s head whipped round at Draco’s defence, a glimmer of hope started to form inside her.
Pansy looked around at Hermione, ‘’well if your sticking up for buck tooth here, then I’ll go.’’ With a flick of her wand, she was dressed and out the door quicker than you could say constant vigilance.
Hermione new which memory she wanted to show next, after that, there were only two memories left.
The two were in Hermione’s bedroom, memory Hermione was on her bed, memory Draco under the door frame, real Hermione smiled to herself.
*‘’Is this friendship thing working out for you. Us, being just friends.’’ He made hand gestured motioning between Hermione and himself.
Draco looked at himself, not knowing what would come next.
Hermione paused, , ‘’no, no it’s not.’’ She looked down and pulled the duvet over her.
Draco sighed, ‘’what do we do?’’ he walked back to her bed, and sat at the end.
‘’I…I don’t know.’’
‘’What if, we just take it as it comes?’’
‘’What do you mean?’’
‘’Well, if something happened, like those kisses that you keep stopping, how about, you don’t stop them, and if you need something, we go to each other.’’
‘’Or, why don’t we, just…’’ afraid to say more, she stopped.
‘’Just what?’’ he looked at her, worried she was about to reject him.
‘’Hermione, I like you, I do, and if you don’t, I completely understand why.’’ He looked down .
Hermione gasped, the infamous Draco Malfoy, the boy, that hated her for 7 years, the boy who took the piss out of her for her bloodline, the boy who had joined the dark side, the boy who bullied her, and tormented her to tears, the boy who she had come to like during this short space of a couple of months, the boy she had grown to care about, and like, had just admitted his feelings for her. Crap.
‘’Hermione, say something, please.’’ She could hear the desperation in his voice.
‘’Is this, all lies?’’
His face went cold, ‘’no, it isn’t.’’
‘’I don’t know what to say, I don’t know how to take all of this. Im confused. 7 years, 7 years you hated me, why now?’’
‘’because I finally got to know you, plus, you’ve changed, you have become more…more quieter, you don’t act like you know it all, but there is just something more, damsel in distress about you. I want to be there to rescue when you fall.’’
‘’I fell a long time ago.’’
‘’well then, I want to be here, to make sure you don’t fall again.’’
She smiled, weakly. ‘’since when did you become such a softie?’’
He laughed, ‘’since, hmm, September?’’ he winked.
‘’Draco, let’s take it as it goes, but, let’s not tell anyone for now. Let’s carry on like we hate each other, because…because I think it would be easier for everyone, I mean, we have our common room, and we have to plan this ball thing, we could come out then, if…if you want?’’
‘’Sure thing, but does that mean, that we’re a thing?’’
‘’we’re a thing’’ they both smiled at each other.’’*
The room around them clouded and they were transported to the next morning, Hermione felt a blush appear as she knew what would happen next.
Sitting up her bed, she smiled, She laughed, she got up out of bed, and put on her slippers, tying her messy curly hair into a bun, and putting her dressing gown on, she made her way to the common room. Opening the door, she looked down into the room, he wasn’t in there. She made her way down to the setae, started the fire, and started reading a book on the Titanic.
A while later Draco opened the door and noticed Hermione sitting opposite the fire -he smiled, going over the events of the previous night. He quietly made his way down the stairs and sat next to her. Without thinking, he took her face and kissed her, Hermione, caught off guard, jumped at the touch of his lips on hers.*
Once again they landed in the common room.
‘’You know, when you told me, I didn’t expect it to be me asking you…’’ he raised an eyebrow.
‘’I know, that’s why I showed you.’’ she smirked.
‘’Another?’’ he asked.
Hermione braced herself, the next two would be quite emotional for her.
*"Hermione? Its Harry, are you okay?" Hermione nodded her head, fluttering her eyes fully open. She examined the room, she saw everyone but Draco.
"Ginny, Ginny where’s Draco?" She looked around to see saddened faces. She sat herself up using her elbows and found out the hard way, that her arm was still sore.
"Hermione, hes" Ginny took a deep breath, and took Hermione’s hand, "Hermione, Draco…he’s gone."
"Gone? What do you mean gone? Oh…no did he?" Hermione gasped, dreading the worst.
"No…no, Hermione, he’s gone. He left Hogwarts." Ginny looked down.
Ginny handed a shocked Hermione the letter.
Hermione took it, and Ginny signalled for everyone to leave.
Hermione closed her eyes, and took a deep breath.
I'm not ready for this. You can’t leave, please Merlin let this be a cruel joke of some sort. I wouldn’t cope if you left.
She gently opened the letter, and unfolded the parchment.
My dearest Hermione,
If you’re reading this, then Ginny has told you what I have done.
You’re angry at me, I know that, but I'm so sorry. I did not want to do this, but I have no other choice. I'm doing this to protect you. You remember the story I told you about, the one about the other one, how she got killed? I made a mistake that time, I'm not repeating it, I'm letting you go, so you can live.
I want you to live Hermione, I want you to have a long happy, full life, and you can’t have that with me, not while he is out there, I'm going to search for him until I stop him.
This is so hard for me, I don’t want to do this, but I need to, for you. I hope that one day you can forgive me for leaving you without saying a proper goodbye. I wish I could say goodbye properly, but if I did, I wouldn’t have left, you would have begged me to stay, and I wouldn’t have said no to you.
I’ve written this letter so many times this night, I wanted to get it perfect for you, its the least I could do for you, it’s what you deserve.
So, Hermione, move on, forget about me, graduate from Hogwarts, and find a man, get married, and have children with him and grow old with him.
I don’t know if I will see you again, Lucius might lead me to the other side of the world for all we know, but I will try my hardest to see you again, if I don’t, I just want you to know…actually, never mind.
So, please, for me, be happy.
I will miss you so much,
Hermione looked up, and let the tears fall, she looked towards the door, and thought she saw a flash of blonde hair, she quickly shook it off, and started to let her emotions pour out of her.*
Draco leaned back from reading the letter and sighed. Closing his eyes, he asked to see the last memory, it was getting all too much.
Hermione nodded and done as he wished, the last memory was her last memory of her Draco.
"LET HER GO, KILL ME INSTEAD. JUST LEAVE HER BE!"
"I will have no son of mine date a mudblood, or did you forget what I did last time?"
Real Draco looked around surveying the scene, he saw his father shouting at him, and Hermione scrunched in the corner, presumably in a body bind hex.
Draco flinched. "No, I won’t let you repeat history!"
"Oh, I will." Lucius laughed.
But Draco watched as his own spell backfired and he flew against the wall with a thud, sliding down the wall.He froze in shock.
Hermione watched the events happen in front of her, she saw Draco lying on the floor, so helpless.
Hermione mustered all her energy and summoned all of the magic inside her, she screamed, releasing out her magic, freeing her from her body bind hex.
She took a deep breath, "STUPIFY! PETRIFICUS TOTALUS!" Hermione screamed at Lucius. He flew back, and was now lying by Kleydor’s side.
Hermione looked at Lucius, and then ran over to Draco.
"Draco, Draco!" she held him, and put her hand behind his head, she felt something sticky. She pulled her hand back, and saw blood.
"NO! No, no, no." Hermione looked at him.
"Hermione..." Draco opened his eyes, "Hermione, listen to me." He watched as Hermione started to cry, "Hermione, did you hear the conversation between me and Kleydor?" his voice was faint, barely above a whisper. Hermione nodded, sniffing. "Hermione, I love you. I’ve loved you for a long time. I'm sorry I never told you before." His breath got heavier.
Real Draco looked at him-self, he never would admit he loves someone unless it was true. He saw Hermione turn away from the scene, he wondered why. He turned back and listened to Hermione’s next words.
"Oh Draco, I love you too." She laughed and looked back down at him, his eyes were closed, his chest rose and fell but didn’t rise.
Draco looked at the real Hermione who was sniffing in the corner, she is in love with me, and I was her…it all makes sense now He thought.
"Draco? she shook him, eyes wide and tears started to fall, but he didn’t respond. "Draco?" she put his head back down and put her ear to his chest and listened for his heartbeat, but she couldn’t hear it. ‘’No, Draco please wake up, please, please wake up.’’ Hermione’s eyes started to sting, tears building up in her eyes, "NO, I WILL NOT LET YOU DIE, I JUST GOT YOU BACK!" She put him flat on the floor, and put her hands on his chest, above his heart, and started pressing down in threes. "Draco, Draco wake up."
She pulled her hands back and put her head back to his chest, nothing. She put her lips to his, and gave him mouth to mouth. Again and again she blew into his mouth, hoping and praying to hear his voice once more.
She pulled back, all the air in her was gone, she had no energy left. She looked at the lifeless body in front of her, and screamed,
"WHY?" she started to sob. She looked at Draco once more, mustering all the energy in her, and formed a fist with both her hands. She positioned her hands above Draco’s heart once more, and slammed down on his chest, hoping the momentum would help. She looked at him, nothing.
She closed her eyes, when she heard a gasp and some coughing, she opened her eyes and saw Draco’s chest rising and falling.
"Thank Merlin." She took his body, and wrapped arms around him, holding him, letting her tears fall.*
They landed with a thump back in the common room, Draco felt strange, weird even, he just watched himself confess his love for someone he use to despise, die, then come back to life. He couldn’t process it all. He sat down and looked at Hermione who was trying to control her sobs on the sofa by the fire. He needed to be alone, to process everything, he grabbed the photo album and left, leaving Hermione to cry harder into her hands.
A/N: ooooooooh, what do you think?
Im sorry this one is just more memories and more of a filler, but i thought it was important as this story is coming to a close soon, and i thought it would be good for you to go over some things that have already happened in the story as its always good to refresh!
25/8/13: OMG IM SO SORRY IT TOOK SO LONG, BUT ITS FINISHED AND EVERYTHING. PLEASE DONT HATE ME <l3
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