Chapter 3 : Lucy: I Hate Him, I Hate Him... Not
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No. No, I won't hurt him. It's a party, everyone is having fun, I don't want to ruin the mood by messing with Jackson's face. But I will make sure we're alone when I verbally bitch slap him. Ciaran would roll his eyes and tell me I'm being melodramatic because we fight all the time, but not this time - this time Jackson deserves it.
I stare down at black stain on my tutu, know it's gone all down my back as well. I also know that my wing is ripped. That I can fix, Nana Molly taught me a few things and I just need to seal it up, but the stain is too hard - that'll actually need cleaning. Because Jackson had someone ask for help, so that I'd be in his target zone, as well as his line of sight, when I was hit with a balloon filled with sticky black goo.
He must pay.
But he ran away a moment after we locked eyes and I can't find him in the masses of people.
"Have you seen Jackson? Jack Ryder, where is he?" I ask everyone willing to stop. Even when I grab them, most pull away and move.
Eventually, someone points to my right, where I find Jackson talking to a girl in Ravenclaw. Well, I'd be a horrible human being if I didn't warn her about his evil intentions. It's the right thing to do really, I'm just being a good samaritan.
"He just wants to get into your pants," I tell her and I look absolutely serious. I don't even smile when my eyes flicker to his face and I see him lock his jaw and grind his teeth. I didn't really know if that would work, he tells different girls different things and sometimes he's honest about his intentions. Judging from her glaring at him and him glaring at me, he lied this time - he probably gave her the 'I'm not like other guys, I'm waiting for the right girl' speech or the 'all people care about is that my family are famous, I just wish someone would treat me like everyone else' speech. For someone who really does get uncomfortable when people ask about his family, he has no problem using it to get into a girl's bed.
What a douche.
I tell her all of this.
"You're doing the right thing!" I call to her as she walks away. I'm surprised she didn't slap him. And that's not me thinking every girl is like me and wants to slap him. Because most girls are not like me; they tend to find him attractive and adorable.
Just for the girl whose reputation I saved, and, okay, also for myself, I give him a dead arm; I'll replay his embarrassing stumble in my head for days to come. Not that it should have surprised him.
"I hate you," I spit out, my face so close to his that I can smell the alcohol on his breath.
Jackson squeezes his eyes shut and takes a deep breath, pushing me away from him before opening them again and saying anything. "Yeah, well, the feeling is mutual. But I'll sleep better knowing that you are, or were, the only one who felt that way for me, whereas I can make a list of people who feel something negative for you."
I almost call his bluff; I know it's not true, whenever I've heard people talk about me, it's because they've actually been asked and it is always polite things. I don't spend enough time with other people for them to have any negative opinions. I like my world with my small group of friends.
And by that, I mean Ciaran and Louis. Occasionally he'll bring his friends, Kyle and Luka. And, of course, Dom used to hang out with us sometimes. But he had his Kieron, so he doesn't count.
As you can see, Jackson doesn't make the list.
I shut my mouth, though; even the thought of hearing a made up group of people who 'hate' me doesn't sound all that good. He looks smug, like thinks he's got to me, but he so hasn't. I won't let him.
I drag him by his sleeve, make him follow me to the closest door I can find - it's an old store room, one I'd imagine you'd use for cleaning supplies or something, but it's dirty and bare. This room hasn't been used in a while. It'll do. I pull him in.
"Try anything and I'll scream," he blurts out randomly, then he frowns. Yeah, he knows what he said makes him seem more like a girl than I already liked to think.
I pull my wand out of the little zipped pocket I made on the inside of my tutu and put a Silencing charm on the door, as well as a locking charm. He can scream like a girl all he wants, no one can hear him.
(Insert Ciaran worthy villain laugh here - I spend way too much time with that boy.)
"We're in here so that I can yell at you for what you've done to my costume without disrupting the party! Look at me!" I end up shrieking, but I don't care.
Jackson looks at me thoughtfully; yeah, I hate him. "What a lovely little fairy you are," he smirks. "The black goo is like icing on the cake."
"Why would you do this? Why would you think that this is funny?"
He scoffs at me, he genuinely scoffs at me. "That's not funny," he gestures to the goo, "you're reaction is what's funny."
If Ciaran were here, and could see me, he'd say that I snapped; I call whacking him in the chest a good few times therapeutic. Firewhiskey may be playing a part, but I've only had a couple of glasses; he's the drunk one. It knocks him off balance, takes him a few minutes to stop me. He grabs my arms and pulls me close; my body is pressed against his, personal space may as well be a myth. His breathing is ragged, short - I don't know what's wrong with him, but he's starting to make me nervous.
"There's something seriously wrong with you," I whisper. It's all I can manage.
Jackson shuts his eyes again, so tightly that I'm sure he can see colored dots when he opens them and stares at me without really looking. "You have no idea," he finally mutters.
Then his lips crash into mine and he's kissing me like he won't live to see tomorrow - which will probably be true once I'm thinking straight again. Right now, all I can do is stand here and... wait?
"You drive me crazy," he says softly, gently pushing me back against the wall. "We make life hell for each other, but you're all I think about. Why?"
He didn't wait for me to answer, or he doesn't expect one, which is good because I don't have one. His mouth is back on mine and this time his hands are in my hair, around my neck, and probably covered in thick, black goo, but this is not what is on both of our minds - my surprise comes out as a gasp and he uses it to deepen the kiss, his tongue grazing mine, and all rational thought is thrown out of the window, smashed to pieces and run over for good measure.
I kiss him back.
Once he knows I'm not going anywhere or doing anything to stop it, he moves to my jaw and up to my ear, then down to my neck. I briefly wonder if I should hide the hickey he's definitely put there later, then he's back on my lips. His hands move down to my thighs and up my tutu, pulling me up to wrap my legs around his waist before he grasps my hips.
My last, fleeting thought: I could be completely sober, I'm still going to blame it on the alcohol after this.
After... it is over, we just end up sitting on the floor, staring at the door no one can get through because it's easier than facing each other. Unfortunately, I wasn't all that drunk and he has obviously sobered up, so neither of us can laugh this off and pretend it didn't happen. It's awkward and I don't know how to handle it.
We've been mad, bad and, when it comes to Ciaran, sometimes appreciative, but never awkward around each other.
"We should just not talk about this ever," he says eventually, still not bringing himself to look at me.
"Right. Especially not Ciaran."
"No, not Ciaran. He'd read too much into it."
I hold back a scoff, albeit unsuccessfully; Ciaran has told me more than once that we secretly love each other, that we're just delaying the obvious. He sounded like he was joking and I have never believed that about me, but Jackson? Given what he said, I'm not so sure. And I'm not sure that I want to.
I feel bad for keeping something from my best friend, but, and I hate that I'm agreeing with him, Jackson is right - if Ciaran wasn't joking, he'd be way too smug; if he was, it's now something he'd think about. Either way he would read way too much into this situation. Besides, it's private. Ciaran would never tell us about his love life, he wouldn't expect it from us.
"We'll just forget the whole thing," he says with a nod; he's made up his mind, it didn't happen. "You gonna open the door or what?"
"Oh. Right. Sorry," I stutter, finding my wand and removing the charms I'd placed. I'm vaguely aware that I apologized to him.
Jackson has the decency to wait for me to fix my costume and look presentable before pulling the door open and disappearing. I give myself another minute, then follow, looking for Ciaran this time.
"Have you seen Ciaran James?" I ask person after a person, hearing my own voice get stronger as time passes. I'm almost my old self, not the very confused girl who had thought it was a good idea to have sex with her best friend's best friend in an old room moments before.
"Are you looking for your friend and cousin?" Emily, a friend of my cousin James, asks me. I only nod. "Louis took him back to school a little while ago. He's probably in his dorm by now."
"Oh, thank you."
With my best friend gone, I decide to just follow and go back to school. I don't want to be here anymore; I'm dirty, I'm sticky and I don't want to see Jackson anymore today.
During the ride, I amend my previous statement: part of me really hates him and the rest of me... doesn't.
A/N: And that, friends, is what happened when they disappeared on Halloween... The first of many. ;)
I hope you enjoyed this new missing moment, please let me know what you think. :)
Next: Hugo tells Skander about his crush.