Chapter 9 : Albus Crushes My Dreams
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Damn it. Maybe if I pretend I’m a walrus they won’t come near me. Start waddling and make odd noises.
“HEY, WAIT UP!”
Come on! Walrus, walrus, walrus!
I was surprised when the yelling stopped. I continued to make walrus noises just in case, but I still felt a little relieved that I didn’t have to engage in actual social contact. That’s scary stuff.
I strutted back to the castle with the swaggy confidence of a thousand teenage pop stars with flippy hair. I have escaped the wrath of the dreaded male species. ONCE AGAIN I HAVE PREVAILED! BOW DOWN TO ME!
I got about halfway back to my stone safety net when a large figure popped out of the bush and pounced on me like a cougar. At first I thought that it actually was a cougar so I bit it, but when it cried out “OW WHAT THE HECK!” I concluded that couldn’t have been a feline companion.
I pushed the lumpy mass off of me and stood up. My back was caked in mud and the dirt water was soaked through my uniform.
“Thanks a lot, random human!” I shouted and wiped my eye clean. As I blinked, the random human came into focus.
“What the hell are you talking about Vivo?”
“NANNERS I DIDN’T RECOGNIZE YOU I’M SO SORRY HOW HAVE YOU BEEN HOW ARE THE KIDS? OH RIGHT YOU AREN’T MARRIED BUT IT’S BEEN FOREVER WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN LIKE OH EM GEE, GIRL!” He had a terrified grin on his face as I rambled uncontrollably.
“Well, ever since you got into that fight with Robyn and then that fight with Al and then that fight with Ben, I decided to take a break because I didn’t want the next fight to be with me.”
My face sunk, “I’m sorry, Nan. I’ve been a really jerk face. I don’t know what’s wrong with me this year. I mean, I’m usually crazy and I usually piss a few people off but it’s never been to this extent. What’s different?”
He cocked his head slightly, as if to get a better angle, “Albus. That’s what’s new. He’s changed you, and I’m not saying it’s in a bad way, but he has changed you. Maybe you should obsess less and actually try to get him to like you.”
“But I’m too weird to have normal feelings. I’ve been diagnosed by doctors.”
Nanners laughed, “You have not! All you have to do is be normal for one day and see what happens. It’s on that dumb list of yours anyway, just give it a shot.”
“Ok, so I’m just supposed to yoloswag into the castle and be all like ‘Yo, fellow students I am normal, I am here, and I am in love with Albus Potter’?”
Nanners just stared at me, “If I ever hear you say ‘yoloswag’ one more time I might actually have to murder you to prevent future generations from inheriting your genes. But, seriously, all you have to do is start a half-normal conversation with him. Talk about the Quidditch game, you played really well, and I’m sure he’d be really interested talking about it.”
Albus…interested…in…me… OH MY GOD THIS IS A DREAM COME TRUE I WILL WRITE THIS DOWN IN MY DREAM JOURNAL AND BY DREAM JOURNAL I MEAN SCRAP PIECE OF PAPER I HAVE HIDDEN IN MY LEFT BOOT THAT HAS THINGS ABOUT ALBUS WRITTEN ON IT. I’M SO EXCITED.
I cleared my throat, “That sounds reasonable.”
Nanners stared blankly at my calm exterior, but he knew that on the inside I was having a spaz attack.
“Very good, Vivo, very good…” he said smirking, “I’ll see you around, keep calm, got it?”
“Yes…very calm…” I murmured and he walked off chuckling. As soon as he was out of sight I began waving my arms around like a wet noodle yelling, “HE’S GONNA BE INTERESTED!”
Robyn decided to spend the next week just completing as much challenges as possible. Her first couple days she twerked on the Astronomy Tower (#3) and taught a yoga class to first years in exchange for candy (#67), I was impressed with how well she was embracing the Weird Life. I had major respect for that. I guess she was just trying to keep her mind off Mike, which was understandable, because I was trying to keep my mind of Ben.
I hadn’t seen him around since our big fight, and I really was happy about it. He seemed to dip back into the shadows and even in Charms I didn’t see him. Maybe he moved to Durmstrang with Kerf. I sure hope so. I decided to take Nanner’s advice and just make a move on Albus, a normal move. My hair would be blowing in the wind, my smile would be pristine, my jokes would be clever and on point… BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA I could not keep a straight face saying that… I think you know that I’m, going to be normal for like 2 minutes and then I’ll start rambling fun facts about sperm and the whole thing will be over, but I’m still excited for the attempt. Cue dance transition music to the library.
DA NA NA NA NA NA NA NA NA NA DA NA NA NA NA NA NA NA NA NA DA NA NA NA NA NA NA NA NA
I spotted Albus sitting at the far tables as soon as I strutted into the library. I was reading one of his textbooks with a confused look on his face. He’s so cute when he’s confused. I walked over and pulled out the chair opposite him, “Mind if I join you?”
A grin spread across his face, “Yeah, sure.”
“What are you grinning at?” I asked suspiciously.
He laughed, “I’m just surprised that you didn’t jump out from behind a book shelf or throw a quill at my face or something.”
“Pft...why would I do that? It’s not like I’m crazy or anything.”
“Oh, yeah…not crazy at all,” he smirked and went back to his notes.
“What are you writing?”
“Oh, just some quick notes for Transfiguration…nothing important really. I actually was meaning to talk to you about something,” he said. I tried not to freak out or mumble something about his buff, yet inviting arms. ALBUS WANTED TO TALK TO ME THIS SEEMS SERIOUS.
“So, I have a proposition for you since you and Ben broke it off…”
My heart leapt up into my throat. He’s going to ask me on a date. I’m single. He’s single. Robyn’s single. Nanners is single. My gross Potions teacher is single. It’s all ready. We’re good. This is my moment. My year long conquest is finally going to pay off. My creepiness shall win over the heart of Albus. I wonder if he knows what the names of our kids are going to be. I think he’ll want to pick something strong, yet simple, like Emmett or Joshua. They’ll grow up in a small country home, with a big yard for playing Quidditch and a really awesome fort with like secret tunnels that lead all over the place and A REALLY COOL PET TIGER WITH RAZOR SHARP CLAWS…
“Go on…” I replied, calmly and collectively.
“Well, since you’re now single I thought that you might want to have a date for Hogsmeade next week…”
…EMMETT WILL HAVE BLACK HAIR AND BROWN EYES AND WILL BE SUCH A LADIES MAN AND THEN JOSHUA WILL BE BOOKY AND SWEET AND WILL MARRY A NICE WOMAN NAMED LORRAINE WHO IS A MUGGLE LIBRARIAN…
“I won’t be surprised if you say no, but I just really think that it’d be a good idea…”
…AND THEN WHEN WE HAVE 6 GRANDCHILDREN WE WILL GIVE JOSHUA THE FAMILY HOME AND MOVE TO A QUIET COMMUNITY IN NORTHERN ENGLAND THAT IS PREDOMINANTLY OCCUPIED BY MUGGLES…
“Would you like to go on a date…”
“Yes…?” I waited for an ending to the sentence.
…Where I and my dreams will die.
A/N: Oh my gosh. I cannot believe how long it has been. Well, let me explain (and make horrible crappy excuses)…I tried to to NaNoWriMo and failed epically, because I had just started a job and school was getting more and more time consuming and I told myself I’d start writing again during Christmas. I honestly wrote the first half of this chapter back in December and now it’s July and I’m kicking myself for not finishing it. I really hope you guys will continue to read the story & I would appreciate if you guys left me a review (even if it is just to call me a bloody scallywag and karate chop my clavicle via the internet). I hope you guys liked it…I will be writing this summer…that is a guarantee. Thanks, lovelies!
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