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Chapter 1 : on to the next life
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I knew, from the moment the spell escaped her lips, I knew I was dead. I was gone. Going through that portal, it was hard. Knowing there were so many things I wanted to say to you. Honestly Harry, I didn’t think that would be the last time I would see your face-human to human.
I just wanted to express all the untold feelings and things I wanted to tell you into this one last letter to you. Your probably wondering why your parents, Remus or Tonks have come to pick you up, but please, do not get angry with them; they’re watching as we speak, but i'll get onto that later.
You see Harry, I went into the portal backwards, it then felt like I was floating but falling at the same time; I actually landed with a thump, but I didn’t get hurt. See, you don’t get hurt after you die, you just...simply wonder until you can finally pass on. I got up from the ground, and looked around. I was in a white room-like ones you get at St Mungo’s- and there was a plaque on the wall which read ‘new arrivals.’ When I saw the plaque, it made me laugh. I thought it was quite humorous considering the circumstances that had just happened... I went over to the door, and put my hand on the brass handle, gently pushing it down, opening the door to reveal your parents’ house. I saw no one else, just a simple note on the middle table that read,
‘Dear Sirius Black,
Welcome to death, is there any other way to put it simpler than that? I apologise for the inconvenience, but currently Lily and James are with Harry helping him with his current mission. I am sorry for your timing and that death has fallen upon you, but I hope you enjoy your surroundings. If you go to Harry’s room, you are able to watch and help harry if you are needed to. You may even been summoned by him if somehow he gets the resurrection stone (I assume you are familiar with the Deathly Hallows). But you are able to go down and stand by him, but I warn you. You cannot do anything, or touch anything, only be by his side and travel with him wherever he goes.
I apologise again for Lily and James’ absence, they do not know you are here. It will be a surprise (im not currently sure if it is a good or bad one) when they finally arrive to greet you, but for now while you wait, I hope you will go into Harry’s room and watch and help him along his journey today.
Lily and James will explain everything when they arrive,
That was the end of the letter, quite a peculiar letter, don’t you agree? Anyways, that is not the point. I put the letter back down on the dark wood table, and went to your room. It was the same as I remember, it had your cot, but there were moving pictures from you over the years. Did I ever tell you that you were an adorable young child? The Dursleys never deserved you as their nephew; they never deserved to look after you. I sat in the armchair in the corner of the room by your cot, not quite knowing what to expect. About a minute later, a bright white light filled the room, and I could see you on the bare wall opposite me. I saw you completing the mission, and Dumbledore defeating Voldermort and ministry arriving. I heard your thoughts, Harry, it was not your fault I am where I am now, trust me, it’s not your fault. It broke my heart when I saw you talk to Nearly Headless Nick to see if I could be a ghost, im sorry Harry, I didn’t leave an imprint of myself on the earth. I never thought I would die so early on in the long battle. I hope you forgive me.
The light came again, and you were gone, it was just the yellow wall again. I walked back through to the main room, and saw the door opening, I searched for my wand, but I couldn’t find it, Im wandless. I braced myself for whoever was behind the door, the door slowly opened, when I saw the familiar black messy hair, your father and mother walked through the door. Shock and surprise were the only emotions I could read on their face. They were both really happy to see me, but after a while, realisation hit them both that I had passed. It was an emotional time. They asked about you Harry, they asked how you were and how you were coping without them. They are so proud of you.
They asked me what happened, I told them the whole story; of how you had your vision (Dumbledore had previously informed me of the events taking place) and what happened in the ministry of magic. I then asked how they not know this all as they had been with you, but what I got told next was fascinating.
As we all love you so dearly, an enchantment has been placed upon us. We can only go with you inside your heart, unless (as you know) you have the resurrection stone. We cannot hear or see what happens, we are just there to give you strength and love to carry on with your journey in life. It sounds harsh, yes, but it’s what makes you, you Harry. It happens to every individual- if someone loves someone enough when they pass; they are able to help them throughout their life journey. You will be able to do the same, as you have enough love in you for everyone to last many lifetimes.
After a long conversation about you, we all decided that we would always help you, even if you do not need it. We would be there, inside your heart.
We witnessed you helping Dumbledore help find the locket; you were so brave at that point. You followed his orders and made him drink the poison, well done Harry. We then watched you as you witnessed Dumbledore pass. At this point, Lily was furious with Snape, she always carried on wanting to be his friend after she passed. We were all angry at Snape; we wondered how he could do such a ghastly thing. We all thought they were friends. We watched as your tears fell, your mother was screaming, she wanted to be there and hold you and tell you everything was going to be okay, but she couldn’t, none of us could.
We spend majority of our day watching you Harry, but don’t worry Harry, we give you your privacy, so that panicky feeling you just had, can disappear now.
When you went off to find the rest of the horecruxes, we prayed that Ron, Hermione and you would survive, but I knew you could. I knew how smart Hermione was, and I knew how courageous Ron and you were, I knew secretly that you would survive. With every one getting destroyed, your parents had more hope you would make it through. When Lily’s doe came to you, we got slightly confused, we all knew that there was an individual patronus to every person, yet here was Lily’s doe sent you. The only exception can happen is when someone was truly in love with that person, but the only person we knew of in that moment that truly loved your mother was your father. You went get the sword in the pond, but you couldn’t get out, we all started to panic. We were so grateful when Ron showed up, the panic disappeared, and we knew, we just knew you we going to finally win this.
We watched the whole battle play out, we watch you wherever you went. When you stepped out of the crowd of students at Hogwarts, we jumped for joy for you. Then you went against Snape, Lily was so angry at Snape for ever trying to hurt you. We watched you fight and kill, and then the call when we heard the door open again, we wondered who it was, then Remus and Tonks walked through the door, it was devastating, knowing they had lost their lives, but me and James greeted him like it was yesterday we had last seen each other, Tonks told us about their son, and your mother started to cry, another child growing up with his parents, but James calmed her, knowing he would have you, Hermione and all the Weasleys looking after him, and that they wouldn’t let him forget his parents. We also saw Fred, it broke our hearts, as I found out your parents grew quite fond of the twins, but Tonks was upset the most, as they were pranksters together, as she calls it.
We then watched, as you saw Snape die, and we all knew he would be summoned here while the last moments of the battle played out. We heard the door click, and Snape walked in, the abuse he received from James, Remus and I was unbelievable, but your mother waved it off, we all saw his memories, and she apologised, apologising for not realising, and for ditching him after she got with your father. He apologised also for his attitude towards Harry over the years, but she understood. He found out that we also saw the memories, and he was embarrassed, but James said it does not matter; he’s in a better place now.
When you summoned us with the resurrection stone, Tonks decided to stay back, she thought it wasn’t right if she went, so she said she would stay with you here, and watch after you with Snape and Fred. Fred tried to join in, but just sat in the corner, praying for his brothers and sister to survive, saying his parents didn’t need any more loss.
So we went down, we closed our eyes, and then we were next to you. It was so good to see you again Harry, so good, and for your parents. I remember our conversation like it was yesterday, I was so happy I got to talk to you again, but yet again, I didn’t say what I wanted to say fully, but I told you the most important thing, and im glad you still remember it.
We saw you die, (we got blocked off at that point) and then return, Lily started crying with happiness, we saw you kill Voldemort, and return the elder wand to its former master. We were so happy you retunred it; we didn’t want it falling into the wrong hands.
We were there, all the way, your wedding, the birth of your children, it was beautiful. Remus, your father and I stood next to you at your wedding, we were allowed to do that, and im so glad we were. Your children are beautiful Harry, and so Is Ginny.
I don’t know why im telling you this now, as im just going to tell you soon anyways, but it’s rather comforting in some ways don’t know how, it just is.
I just watched you take your last breath and now im crying, clever one Sirius.
‘’Siruis?’’ You say to me, as you get up as a young man again, ‘’ did i?’’
‘’Yes you did, but im here to tell you a story, and take you on, to the next life.’’ You nod, ‘’ Many people think that death is always slow and agonising, but it’s quicker than falling asleep…’’
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