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Failure At Dating by AlexFan
Chapter 1 : Preparations
Rating: 15+Chapter Reviews: 7

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 Being a girl always sucks. We get the short end of the stick, all of the damn time. We were the ones who got treated like property and never got to vote. We're always talked to like we're morons and treated like weaklings. Women are the ones who have to go through the painful time of the month every. Damn. Month. And we're the ones who always give birth.

Not to mention we're always the ones who have to look good whereas guys can dress like complete hoboes and it's totally acceptable. If a girl goes out with unshaved legs everyone just starts to flip out and starts calling you an ape (that's one mistake I'm never making again).

I was about to go through one of the most painful things that a woman ever went through. I was going to get ready for a date that I'd been dreaming of since third year.

And I was going to let Lily get me dressed.

Turns out, that was a bad idea. Go figure.

"ROSE! GET UP AND GET WASHED! WE'VE GOT WORK TO DO!" Lily yelled extremely loudly as she literally kicked open my dorm door and barged into my room.

"Lily, it's seven in the morning," I managed to groan out when I caught sight of the time. Lily ignored me and made her way to my wardrobe and started to look through my things. She discarded things that she didn't deem fit for a date and threw anything that she thought was ugly straight into the trash. Apparently my favourite sweater belongs in the trash then.

"You know, Lily is a very feminine name for someone who's the spawn of Satan," Autumn mumbled from the bed next to me. Lily responded by throwing a high heeled show at Autumn's head. Autumn grunted when the shoe made contact with her head but didn't apologize.

"My point still stands," she said before grabbing her blanket, her pillow and making her way down to the common room where she would sleep for the next four hours. Hogsmeade trips were just wasted on Autumm.

"Rose, out of bed," Lily demanded again.

"No," I stubbornly replied and turned over onto my side and went back to sleep. Or, at least I tried, Lily doesn't take well to people disobeying her. She has a tendency to overreact which explains why I wasn't surprised when she dumped an entire pitcher onto my head.

I shot up into a sitting position, sputtering and shook my soaking wet hair out of my face. Before me stood a very smug Lily holding an empty pitcher and a scary shoe.

"I'm up, I'm up, no need to drown me," I said and staggered to the loo, almost giving myself a concussion as I tripped over a pair of shoes in front of me.

"Rose, I have to make you look human in just two hours and as good as I am, I'm not a miracle worker, get washed."

Lily's so humble, don't you think?

It took me an hour to get washed properly. It took Lily an hour to completely destroy the dorm and lose most of my clothes in the process. When I walked out of the washroom, I was immediately dragged over to a mirror and had clothes thrown at me. I shoved on my undergarments as quickly as possible and put on the clothes thrown at me without looking at them.

Once I'd gotten everything on, I was pushed into a chair and Lily proceeded to attack my eyes with make up. While she put on eye-liner and mascara, I was supposed to put on lip gloss and not blink. It was impossible for me to not blink, I was making Lily's job impossible to do at the same time.

"Would you stop blinking? You're making it impossible for me to fix you," Lily finally snapped at me as she stabbed me in the eye yet again.

"Oh, I'm sorry, I forgot that it's easy to not blink when someone is trying to poke your eyes out. I'm sorry for being a horrible doll."

"You should be," Lily replied completely missing the sarcasm in my voice.

"That was sarcasm."

"Yeah, well, you suck at it," Lily said as she finished up on my last eye. "You're done! Go look at my mastery in the mirror."

I walked over and stood in front of the mirror and looked myself over. I feel like Autumn should be wearing this outfit instead of me, her name would suit it a lot more than mine. Plus, these boots were killing my feet already. I'm pretty sure these aren't mine, I wouldn't buy death machines for my feet. Or at least if I did, they wouldn't be a two sizes too small.

"Lily?" I asked.

"Hmm?" she replied standing beside me and looking me over.

"So, where are the other three seasons?" I asked her smiling. She scowled at me and gave me a smack across the back of the head. Sheesh, you can't even make a joke around here without Lily trying to kill you.

"I do all this work and this is the thanks that I get!"

"You're right, thank you. I just hope my date with Scorpius doesn't suck, I finally got up the courage to ask him, I really don't want it to backfire on me," I told Lily making my way towards the door.

"Oh trust me, I'm sure the date will be absolutely entertaining," Lily said giving me an evil smile. Well, that's a bit of a creepy smile, I feel like Lily's going to kidnap me or something.

I left the dorm with the feeling that something very wrong was going to happen. That look that Lily had given me had made me ridiculously nervous, what if something went wrong today? What if I fell in mud and got all my clothes dirty?

I shook the thoughts from my head and headed down to breakfast where it was packed with students and devoid of family members. That was strange. Usually all of cousins were down here taking up one side of the Gryffindor table and being loud. None of them were in here today, did they all have something to do?

I shrugged and sat down to eat breakfast. I ate like a pig to be perfectly honest, it was not a pretty sight, I can tell you that. My mum always said that I ate like my dad but I always just thought it was a Weasley thing. Then again, maybe Fred is an even more repulsive eater than I am. I shoveled food into my mouth as fast as I could and when the time came, I got up from my seat and left the Great Hall to look for Scorpius.

I didn't have to look very long though because he was waiting right outside the Great Hall. He grinned when he caught sight of me and despite my worrying, I was glad to see him as well. Maybe our date wouldn't go badly, maybe for once everything would turn out good.

A giggle from behind me that seemed to be coming from nowhere put an end to that however. I turned around, looking for the giggler but didn't see anyone except a pair of shoes that looked suspiciously like my brother Hugo's. I caught sight of a pair of green eyes hiding behind a statue down the corridor and again the girlish giggle that, now that I think about it, sounded suspiciously like Roxanne.

"You ready to go?" Scorpius asked me turning my attention back to him. I have him the biggest smile I could and the most enthusiastic "you bet!" that I could muster.

"There might be some surprises today, who knows," Scorpius said as we made our way outside. This explains why no one in my family was at breakfast.

"Oh, you have no idea," I replied laughing nervously.

a/n: You know, I'm pretty sure that I have some sort of Work In Progress obsession or something because I love starting stories while I'm writing other stories. Anyway, feedback is always loved! Also, this is slightly different from the first time but I'm hoping that things are for the better.

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