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Chapter 6 : I Don't Know
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Awesome CI by empyreal. @tda
“Kiss me, you idiot,” Lily says to me. We were walking around the Black Lake, chatting or whatever. We stopped, briefly, to throw some bread at the lake animals.
I smile at her and pull her into a sweet kiss. She tries to deepen it, but I pull away and ruffle her hair. She pouts at me, but I turn away and walk along the shoreline, once more.
“I hear you made the Quidditch team,” Lily smiles at me, after racing to catch up to me.
I return her smile, “Yeah, I'm the new keeper.”
“That's awesome, Leo. You deserve it,” she says sincerely, which irritates me.
“You've never seen me play, how do you know I'm not the worst player in the world?” I ask her.
“Oh please, you forget that we used to play together.”
“Oh. Right, I forgot about that.” I frown.
“Ellie's looking very ill,” she says trying to fill the awkward silence that always comes when we talk about our past relationship.
“She picked up some bug from my dad before coming to school,” I lie easily.
She nods her head in sympathy, “That's too bad. Sick for the start of school.”
She sighs in exasperation, “Leo, look at me,” she stops us and forces me to look at her, “Okay, I want to ask you something that I've been scared to ask, okay?” I nod, “Why did you want to get back together?”
I stare into her green eyes, searching for something I knew wasn't there.
Her’s is a good question, something everybody has been asking me, something I should have asked myself before going on an impulse of asking Lily out again. Truth is that I don't know. I should know, but I don't. I owe it to Lily and to myself to figure it out.
“I don't know,” I tell her.
She raises her eyebrows at me and I know, instantly, that that was not the correct thing to say.
“You don't know?” she asks me. I don't know why, but this question irritates me when she asks it.
“Did I stutter?” I reply, angrily, stepping away from her and marching towards the castle.
“Oh no you don't, Galatian. We have to talk about this!” she screams after me.
“It's quite simple, really,” I stop and turn to face her face. Tears are welling up in her eyes, “I don't know. Okay? Understand? Do you need a dictionary?”
She slaps me. We both know I deserve it. We stare at each other. Lily, tears streaming down her face, messing up her makeup and me, probably holding a stupid, angry look.
“I'm sorry,” Lily quickly hugs me.
“Maybe,” I wrap my arms around her crying body and stroke her hair, “we shouldn't try again.”
We both stand there, her crying in my arms and me, holding her and trying to soothe her.
“You're a genius!” Scorpius attacks me in the corridor on my way to the common room.
“Thank you, why?” I ask him. I left Charlotte back in the library about five minutes ago. I'm too exhausted to keep going today and she's pretty out of it, too.
“Leo and Lily broke up!” he sings, hugging me and twirling me around.
“That's great, but I haven't talked to him yet,” I say once he places me back on the ground.
Scorpius shrugs, “Eh, whatever. They're over!” He scampers off to find Leo or something.
After straightening my shirt that wrinkled from Scorpius' attack, I walk to the common room. As I pass an empty classroom, I hear sobbing and pause. Should I comfort that person, or move on? Almost without my permission, my limbs carry me into the room where I find Rose Weasley, crying against a back wall.
I don't hesitate this time in walking up to her and pulling her into an embrace. She holds onto me and lets her tears stain my robes. We stay like this for Merlin knows how long. When she finishes, we sit at an empty desk.
“I,” she bites her lip, “well, I dated someone secretly.”
“You don't have to tell me who, Rose,” I let her know, softly.
She nods her head, gratefully, “Well, things were going to gr-gr-great, but then he kept pushing me. . .further.” Tears start to roll down her face again.
“Oh Rose,” I get off my chair and wipe the tears from her face.
“I told him that I'm not ready, but he wouldn't take no for an answer,” she stutters, not meeting my eyes.
“To hell with him,” I tell her, stroking her back.
She shakes her head, “I told him that I loved him, but I wasn't ready and I'd let him know when I was, but he was so. . .angry,” more tears pour down her face, “He br-br-broke up with me!” she bawls, throwing herself into my arms, once more.
The anger I was feeling towards this particular, unnamed boy was so great that the wolf seemed to shy away from me in terror. I was so angry that I began to cry. The two of us held unto each other.
I walk over to him, cautiously, and rub his back, sympathetically, “What happened, Leo?” I ask him, sitting on the desk in front of him.
“I honestly don't want to talk about it,” he replies, looking up at me. In a sudden movement, he gets out of his chair and grabs my face.
Slowly, he pulls my face towards his own, I don't stop him. His lips are demanding. My hands slip into his hair and his settle on my hips. His tongue slips inside my mouth and I moan with pleasure. Suddenly, I realize what I'm allowing and gently push him off of me. He doesn't fight.
“Kissing me won't solve your problem,” I say after a long, painful silence.
“Hey, I'm going to go to bed. I think dinner starts soon,” Ellie tells me, once again, breaking me from my memory.
I nod and she leaves. I start packing my bag when I see something catch my attention. Leo is wandering through the bookcases in the astronomy section, alone and troubled.
I know that I probably shouldn't bother him, but I rationalize that he should talk to someone, get up, and walk to where he's standing, absentmindedly staring at the books.
“Hello,” I smile at him.
He looks over at me and his eyebrows shoot up, “You're Ellie's friend.”
I nod, inwardly wincing at how my relation to his sister is the only thing he remembers about me, “You seem. . .troubled.”
He laughs, “Isn't everybody?”
“You, more so than the average student.”
He allows this and grabs my hand to lead me to a deserted section of bookcases, out of sight from the general populace.
“Look, do you consider yourself a good friend of Ellie's?” he asks me once we reach his destination.
I nod my head and he smiles, “Okay, then I will tell you something. Have you noticed her becoming exhausted?”
“Yes, she’s sick.”
“Well, not really.”
I stare at him in confusion, “What is wrong with her?”
“It's not my secret to tell you, but I want to ask you a favor. When she tells you, will you still stick by her side, even if you hate her with all of your soul?”
“Of course,” I answer him, a little worried.
He pulls me closer to his face and stares into my eyes, searching for something, he lets go satisfied with whatever he found.
“That was weird,” I state the obvious.
He ignores my comment, “Thank you,” he tells me, sincere.
I smile, “She's my friend.”
“No, you don't understand, Charlotte. Thank you, for everything.” And on that note, he leaves me alone to work out whatever that statement meant.
I can not believe that he broke up with me, again. I splash my face with more water to prevent my eyes from puffing. Leonidas Galatian was my first kiss, boyfriend, love, and heartbreak. When he suggested that we try it again, I instantly thought of all our good times together. I should have stopped to remember all the fights and harsh words. Maybe that way, I wouldn't have accepted his offer and let myself get hurt again. Damn him.
I leave the girls lavatory and enter the Great Hall, my friends will ask questions if I don't go to dinner and I'm not ready to answer questions. Upon entering, I scan the Slytherin table and see Leo sitting with my brother and his stupid friend. I turn and head to my group of friends and notice that Rose is absent. I instantly become worried.
“Hey guys, what's up?” I sit and pile food onto the plate in front of me.
“Hey Lily, did you finish the Astronomy homework?” Stacy asks me.
I shake my head, “I completely forgot. Do you think Rose would let me copy?”
“Probably not, you know how weird she is about those kinds of things,” Tessa joins in, glimpsing at her crush, David, at the Ravenclaw table.
“You could ask her anyway?” Stacy suggests.
I nod my head and allow myself to look across the hall at Leo, he looks the same. Not even a little bit bothered.
“Did you hear about Rose?” Tessa asks me.
I frown, “What about her?”
“She lost her virginity to that Gary guy she was dating,” Tessa giggles at her gossip. Who knows if its actually true.
I stab my dinner, “Oh?” I reply, trying to sound impartial.
“Godric, she's such a slag,” Stacy concludes, shaking her head.
“I saw her with Ellie Galatian, both of them were red faced, with tear stains. Figures the two slags are conversing,” Tessa and Stacy laugh. I attempt to join them, but it sounds fake. They don't seem to notice.
I need to find Rose, now. I get up from the table, “I'm meeting up with Leo after this and I need to re-apply my makeup,” I lie to them.
“I was going to ask you why you look awful,” Tessa raises her eyebrow.
I smile and shrug my shoulders in reply, leaving them to gossip about it. I race up to the Gryffindor tower and, to my delight, find Rose in the common room talking with Ellie.
“Rose, are you okay?” I race to her and engulf her in a hug.
“No, Gary broke up with me,” Rose mumbles into my shoulder.
I pull her away and look into her brown eyes, “He's an idiot. I didn't even know you two were dating! I could have told you that he can't even tie his trainers properly.”
Rose laughs, “You know how our family is, they would have chased him away. I wanted a good chance at a relationship.”
I nod in comprehension and let her go to sit next to her on the couch.
“You're so lucky with Leo, Albus is his friend, so people naturally back away,” Rose sighs, looking into the fire.
I think more about my past relationship, it was kind of perfect. Sure, we irritate each other, but we're both fairly attractive and popular. When we got along, everything was good. He held my hand, laughed at my stupid jokes, and agreed with my stupid ideas. Godric, I miss him.
I smile at Rose, “Yeah, he's a pretty awesome boyfriend.”
Ellie stares at me in surprise, oh Merlin, she must know about the break-up. One of the few.
There’s something about Elizabeth Galatian that sends shivers down my spine. I’ve always felt uncomfortable around her, she’s just so. . .perfect. Perfect hair, teeth. . .everything down to her grades and her personality.
She has life easy with her rich aristocratic family and she has a bestfriend/sibling relation to the hottest boy not related to me: Leo.
It’s because of all of this that James is always following her around, pining for her affections. It’s because of her perfectness that she has driven me into complete hatred.
I hate you, Elizabeth Galatian.
“Hey guys, thanks for your support, but I think I should sleep it off, you know?” Rose asks us, we nod and she leaves for her dormitory.
“Leo broke up with you,” Ellie says once Rose is gone.
I wince at the memory, “For now,” I allow.
Ellie frowns, “I'm pretty sure he means it.”
I decide to change the subject, “You sure are sick a lot.”
She stiffens, “Is there something wrong with that?”
“No, do you have some kind of terminal illness?”
“No,” she sighs, “just a bad immune system.” She looks straight into my eyes.
Oh Merlin, she's lying.
Please review! Thanks for reading :)
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