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Escaping the Friend Zone by jess94
Chapter 37 : The French Problem
Rating: MatureChapter Reviews: 2

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 Chapter Thirty Seven

After Abi slapped me I just wanted to get back to the Weasley household so met up with James and his date, named Shoshanna, and asked if he’d come back with me as I didn’t like having to get portkey’s by myself. Shoshanna asked what a portkey was so James told her I was off my face on drugs and needed to take me home right away and he seemed very relieved that I had come to fetch him so quickly. James and I arrived back the Burrow and I suddenly remembered the lie I’d told him about the French girl called Margaret who was my new girlfriend and coming to the party tonight

“Oh hello dears” said Grandma Weasley “How are you Oliver?” she asked gripping me in a tight lung crushing hug “My, my I have to say you have grown and you’re looking thinner than I remember”. Was she kidding? If I was any skinnier I’d be a toothpick. Still the fast metabolism meant I could eat what I wanted when I wanted in huge quantities though I was very aware the weight would catch up with me. I felt relieved when she finally let me go; I needed to get to Lily before James asked her about my new French girlfriend called Margaret who didn’t exist. I was also keen to tell her what had gone down between Abi and I but I wasn’t really sure she’d be all that pleased to know Abi had been the one pulling all the strings behind her relationship with Malfoy.

Dom and Roxy were in Lily’s room when I arrived, I wasn’t overly pleased when they refused to leave as it meant two more people would find out Lily and I were in love and we were already being risky with Rose knowing. Dom was the biggest gossip in the bloody school and she couldn’t keep a secret for her life

“Oliver, are you alright?” asked Lily as I appeared in her bedroom doorway panting from running up the stairs. I try to avoid running unless being chased “You look like you’ve seen a ghost and if so why do you look shocked? It’s hardly rare”

“Lily, I have done something really stupid” I said moving towards her and perching on the end of her bed. Dom immediately lied down and rested her head on my legs; we seemed to have this deal that whenever I was around and she was tired I morphed into some kind of human pillow. Still, she always smelt nice

“What have you done?” asked Lily looking half-amused and half-panicked “You did break up with Abi didn’t you?”

“You broke up with Abi” exclaimed Roxy “Why the hell have you done that?” Lily hit her cousin round the head before telling me to continue.

“James asked me why I was breaking up with her and I told him it was because I was in love with a French foreign exchange student called Margaret” I said in one breath, they all looked amused and confused at the same time “James kept asking me stuff about her and I made up a bunch of rubbish including telling him that I invited her here. Tonight. For the party”

“…You idiot” was Lily’s reply. Roxy stifled a giggle but Dominique was fully on the floor in gut wrenching laughter “Why the hell did you tell him that?”

“Because, I didn’t want him finding out I was really breaking up with her because I was in love with you. We were in the woods it would have been a perfect place for him to kill me and bury the body” I replied matter of factly. Lily rolled her eyes as what I’d just said seemed to dawn on both Dom and Roxy

“Wait?” said Roxy “You two are in love”

“Yes” we replied together which probably didn’t help people. The only time people ever reply in unison with the same word is if they’re twins or so madly in love they know what the other was going to say

“Oh my god that is so cute” said Dom embracing us both “Can I be a bridesmaid at your wedding? Please, I promise not to sleep with any of the groomsmen”

“That’ll be the day” muttered Roxy as I laughed “So how long have you two been seeing eachother”

“We’re not” said Lily. Dom and Roxy looked confused, so did I “We’re aware we have a lot to lose here so we’re just taking it very slowly, if you want an idea of how slow just imagine James trying to do a Potions essay, nothing official”

“Oh that kinda sucks” said Roxy “I had my eyes on Ben for a groomsmen, he’s very fit”

He’s also very gay and in love with your cousin Roxy; Dom and I made eye contact and both hid a small giggle

“Guys, we still have one problem” I piped up “I told James I was dating a beautiful French girl called Margaret, what should we do? I don’t know any beautiful French women”. And you know what? I really should know some beautiful French women.

“We’ll just get someone to fill the role for the night” shrugged Dom “You guys can have a fight or something, break up and then the lie will be all over and you and Lily can make gorgeous babies”

“There babies will be so gorgeous” cooed Roxy

“We’re not having babies” exclaimed Lily …”Yet”


“OK, that plan could work” I said ignoring Lily’s comment “But we need it to be somebody James doesn’t know which could be a problem, I don’t think there are many girls he doesn’t know. She also needs to be able to understand and speak French”

“Not necessarily” said Lily “James is as thick as a plank of wood; he doesn’t understand Grandpa half the time so I doubt it’ll really matter. Actually, I’ve thought of someone”

“Who?” I asked

“A girl called Anita Watts in the fifth year” said Lily “She sometimes uses our shower because she doesn’t like the girls in her dorm, she’s a bit of a loner but quite pretty and she told me that she spent two months of the summer in a small French village with her grandmother”

“Perfect” I said “But will she do it?”

“She should do hopefully” said Lily searching her address book “Now; I know she gave me her home number a while ago. Aha, here it is”. I couldn’t believe my luck when Lily told me ten minutes later that Anita was delighted to help, though we both suspected she was just glad to be invited to the Potter’s New Year’s Eve party

“Look” said Lily as we sat Anita down on her bed “Thank you so much for doing this it’ll get us out of a really tight spot. Now you know Oliver don’t you”

I waved and smiled at her. She blushed and smiled back

“Now, can you see yourself kissing Oliver” asked Lily

“Definitely” said Anita straight away. She blushed, I seemed to have this effect on women and I hadn’t even been aware of it until a few weeks before. Talk about sixteen wasted years; I was being swooned over by half the female population. Well about four of them but it was still impressive “I mean... erm yes… I can see myself kissing… Oliver”

We left Anita to get ready after explaining the plan, Lily and I sat on the window ledge overlooking the Potter’s lawn. Jack was currently showing off to Lucy and some of her friends who had come over, Louis and Freddie looked as if they were planning something evil and Hugo and Rebecca were snogging by the pond.

“I can’t believe Anita likes me” I said to Lily still looking out of the window “I didn’t even know who she was”

“Loads of girls like you” said Lily kindly “I don’t know why you’re so down on your appearance Oliver, you are very, very handsome. Look, I’m not supposed to tell you this as its feminine law or something but in the fourth floor girl’s bathroom there’s a chart”

“What kind of chart?” I asked

“A chart rating boys looks” Lily replied “It was started about thirty years ago by some mad cow named Lavender Brown and every term there’s a selected ‘hotties list” Lily cringed at the term ‘hotties list’ but continued “And for the last three terms the only people who have stopped you topping the poll are my dear male cousins, my brother and Malfoy. You are one popular guy with the ladies Oliver Benson whether you believe it or not”

“Hang On” I said “So you’re telling me that in a world without Weasley’s, Potter’s or Malfoy I would be the most popular boy in school”

“Bet you wish we didn’t exist” said Lily with a grin

“But then I’d never have met you” I replied

I smiled at her and pulled myself closer towards her, the sun was beginning to set and preparations were being made for the party downstairs. Lily rested her head on my shoulder and looked up at me

“Promise me something” she said

“Anything” I replied

“This time next year you and I will be together” she said “Like properly together… no awkwardness, no waiting around for nutty exes to get the clue, no family who will turn into a lynch mob if they find out”

“Promise” I said kissing her forehead

“Say it properly you fool” said Lily turning and giving me a full on kiss on the lips that was only interrupted by a large “Ahem” from Al and Hugo

“Shed?” said Albus looking at Hugo

“Shed” Hugo agreed with a nod

I gulped. I didn’t know what the shed was but I didn’t like the sounds of it

Next Time: Hugo and Al demand answers but will the plan come together?

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