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Witch Swap by RonWeasleyFans
Chapter 4 : Chapter 4
Rating: MatureChapter Reviews: 6

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 Hey guys, sorry this chapter has taken ages to get here. It's a bit of a filler but I hope you enjoy :) 


Everything you recognise from the Harry Potter books belongs to the wonderful Jo Rowling. I do not own the plot for the program Wife Swap.







God Pansy’s a bitch thought Hermione as she sat down to read the letter with all the information that she would need about Pansy’s life. Although she was thinking this in her head, she kept a gentle smile on her face and was well aware that she was being filmed.


The letter read:


Dear whoever will be living my life for a month.

                                                                        Consider yourself lucky. You will have the best month of your life I expect.


My name is Pansy Malfoy, formally Parkinson. I am married to Draco Malfoy with no children as of yet. I do not have a job so you will be able to spend your time on more important things such as shopping or spending time with my wonderful friends. I really hope that you don’t have a job - I don’t think my nails would agree with one - and if you do, then it’s obvious you are not pureblood.


Of course I am not a slob who sits at home all day.  And I definitely do not under any circumstances cook or clean. I am not a house elf for goodness sake. I am a very busy woman. So here is your timetable for my week.


Monday: Shopping.

Tuesday: Salon with Astoria.

Wednesday: Lunch with mum and dinner with friends.

Thursday: Salon and then lunch with Blaise and Astoria.

Friday: Salon in the Morning. Go out with friends at night.

Saturday: Spa in the Morning. Visit Draco’s parents.

Sunday: Visit my parents.


It is very hard work to keep up the Malfoy name so it is very important that you go to the Salon at least three times a week, as I have mentioned. We don’t want you looking below standard. On Mondays my personal shopper Karen Falgrook will arrive at the Manor at 10am and will take you to the best Pureblood shops.


It is a job in itself to run Malfoy Manor so please keep the house elves in check. They have become careless since my dim-witted husband freed them not a week after I bought them. I am bored of this letter now so I will leave you on one final note. Keep your filthy hands off my husband!


Yours faithfully


Pansy Malfoy.



Hermione was lost for words.


“So Mrs Weasley, what do you think about the life that the other witch lives?” the reporter asked.


“She seems to like her appearance and values the Malfoy name,” Hermione sneered slightly. “I don’t think it will be hard at all keeping to these rules,” she added thinking of the last sentence of the letter in particular.



The camera man packed up and the moment he left, Draco said, “Can I read the letter?”


Shocked at his bluntness, Hermione replied, “Yeah sure, I mean she is your wife,” and handed him the letter.


Hermione took the time to survey Draco as he read the letter. His once pointed face now handsome. He was tall and muscular but still slim.


That’s all the Quiddich, Hermione thought.


His once silver, stone cold eyes, still silver but with what she was sure were flecks of blue. He laughed under his breath as he read the letter.


“God my wife’s a bitch,” he said.


“That’s exactly what I thought!” Hermione blurted out before putting her hand to her mouth, disgusted at what she had just said.


“Don’t worry, it’s true,” he chuckled. “Keep your hands off my husband. She obviously wrote this before she knew you were the other witch. I mean as if you would ever go for me,” he said and handed Hermione back the letter.

Was that a compliment? Hermione confusedly thought to herself. And why did he sound slightly disappointed?






“Hey, Hermione isn’t it?” Astoria asked in a cheery voice.


“Yeah, and you’re Astoria?”


“That’s correct,” she replied.


“Right you must be uba- confused about Pansy’s life. Well every Saturday night we go out to the clubs to let off steam and have a good time.”


“That wasn’t on the timetable” Hermione said confusedly.


Astoria laughed, “Well she probably didn’t like the thought of all of her friends and this mystery woman having a good time without her.”  “We go to the salon on Tuesdays, Thursdays and Fridays. Today’s Tuesday so guess what we’re doing today?” she asked with a cheeky grin.


“Urggghhh!” Hermione sighed. The salon was not Hermione’s friend. All of the posh, rich women always looked at her in disgust whenever Ginny managed to convince Hermione to come with her to one.




“No way!” Hermione refused. “My nails,OK. My make-up OK, but no way are you touching my hair.”


“But Miiooonnneeee!” Astoria pleaded. Astoria and Hermione had gotten on like a house on fire and although she would never let Pansy find out, Astoria much preferred to hang round with Hermione.


“Your hair would look so much nicer a little bit shorter and well, I’m sure I can get rid of some of the… well frizziness.”


At this, Hermione’s attention was caught. “Ok, but nothing too drastic,” she gave in.


“You know what to do…” Astoria whispered to the hairdresser.


An hour and forty three minutes later and the sheet was finally pulled off the mirror in front of Hermione.


A gasp escaped the mouths of everyone in the room. Hermione stared at the woman in the mirror. The sophisticated, elegant and frankly beautiful woman copied Hermione’s every move. It took Hermione a moment to realize that the woman in the mirror was in fact herself.


Her make-up was minimal yet flawless. Her nails perfectly manicured. The biggest change though was her hair. Her usual frizzy, wild and uncontrollable hair was now silky smooth, cascading down her back in soft ringlets.


“Hermione you look amazing!” said Astoria with tears in her eyes.


“I must say, I knew you were beautiful, but I never realized just how beautiful you really were,” The hairdresser breathed.


All Hermione could do was whisper “Thank you” and hug everyone in sight.


After many more hugs and a billion thank yous, Hermione and Astoria finally left the salon and headed back to Malfoy Manor for dinner.


“Wow Granger, you look great,” said Malfoy when the two entered the dining room.


“I think that was the first compliment you have ever paid me Malfoy,” Hermione laughed.


Draco was lost for words and found that his mouth was dry and his stomach doing backflips. He didn’t understand why he felt this way upon seeing Hermione’s new image. Draco decided that he’d better leave before he embarrassed himself further.


“Goodnight ladies,” he said and his voice broke slightly which made his face flush an even deeper shade of red. Hermione looked at him cautiously as if confused as to why he was acting so strangely. He more or less ran out of the room.


“Well that wasn’t strange at all,” Hermione said sarcastically.


“Isn’t it obvious? He thinks you’re hot.” said Astoria casually.


“WHAT!” Hermione Exclaimed.


“He thought you were hot, but he feels weird about it because he’s supposed to hate you. So he does as he always does and runs in awkward situations.”


“What planet are you from? Malfoy does not think I’m hot,” Hermione said a bit too defensively and joined her new friend at the dinner table.


“Okay, okay,” Astoria put her hands up in surrender, “Whatever you say. Now let’s have tea, I’m starving.”


Hermione clicked her fingers and Tonky appeared and said “Are Misses ready for dinner?” They both nodded enthusiastically and Tonky disapparated without another word.



Lying in bed later on Hermione wondered if what Astoria had said about Malfoy thinking she was hot was true. She found herself smiling slightly whilst staring at the ceiling.


Well he is rather hot himself.


She shook her head trying to rid herself of the thoughts.


Hermione and Draco both fell asleep that night and for once they did not have dreams of the war. They had dreams about something, or shall I say someone, that they really ought not to be dreaming of.



Hope you enjoyed, sorry it was a short one, but at least there is a bit of Dramione starting to peep through :) 

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