I own nothing. J.K. Rowling is the worth more than the queen because she owns Harry Potter. A/N: I am an open book, and am more than willing to discuss stuff about this story and the characters in it. Just leave a review if you have anything to say or ask.
Every exciting story has to have a boring beginning. So before I tell you the exciting tale of going to Azkaban, being in the Order of the Pheonix, and fighting Voldemort, I have to give you a briefing on my life before prison.
I was born the eldest Malfoy child. The only daughter. My parents gave the cool name to my younger brother, Draco Lucius Malfoy, while giving me the name of Nathascha Narcissa Malfoy. Not that I hate my name. I just wish I had a name like Draco. That shit is Latin for Dragon. Nathascha? No Latin books have THAT in there. But I digress.
I am six years older than my brother. For six years I lived a relatively normal childhood. Then Draco came along. I don't hate my brother for being born. It's not his fault that my parents had sex. But after his birth, my parents decided that he was the most important little thing ever. After all, he was the one that was going to carry on the family name. Nathascha? All I was going to do was continue some other wizarding name.
Don't get me wrong, I still love my parents. It's not totally their fault that I'm fucked up. I was just born with it. When I was ten, I got drunk off of fire whiskey that I stole from the kitchen. After that, I was drinking everytime my parents left me alone. When I was twelve, my best friend Catonia and I tried tattooing ourselves Muggle style in our dormatory at Hogwarts. I still have that shitty little heart on my hip. Half of it faded and smudged, looking more like an upside down penis than anything.
But what really did it for me. What took the cake was when I was thirteen, I third year at Hogwarts. Catonia and I were quiet, and really only talked to each other. We both were odd, and thought ourselves to be so rebellious, when in all actuality we were just sad little tweens trying to get through puberty. One Saturday evening in the Slytherin Common Room, Catonia and I were doing our homework when we overheard something we found to be quite juicy.
"You going to the party tonight?" Some older kid asked another.
"The one on the third floor, in the old Charms room? Hell yea! I heard Mack McKenzie is gonna be there. He is such a riot." The other replied.
"Who cares about him? There's gonna be alcohol!" The first said. The two laughed, and then begun discussing plans to sneak out in a few hours.
Catonia and I just looked at each other. "Ever got drunk?" I whispered to her. She shook her head no, with a mischevious twinkle in her eyes. "Oh but you should.. Ever kissed a boy?"
Catonia giggled. "No, have you?"
"No, but I'm gonna tonight!" I put my quill down. "I bet if with some simple makeup and the right clothes, we could pass for fifth-years."
And we began plotting. Catonia was a half-blood with a Muggle for a mother, so she knew more about makeup than I could have ever dreamed of knowing. I borrowed some of her muggle clothes, for I had nothing that could ever pass as attractive (a common pure-blood plight). With a simple elargement spell, we created boobs on ourselves. Not good ones, but they'd pass as real to a drunk person. And with that, we started off to the first real party we'd ever been to.
The party was definately not what we were expecting. A party to a thirteen year old involves some alcohol, and some short pecks on the lips as a kiss. Maybe some dancing. But no. People were falling over drunk into other people's laps, making out, and sloppily dancing to the loudest music you will ever hear. Catonia and I looked at each other in awe, not sure what to think. She winked at me and ran out onto the dance floor, spinning in circles. I stayed to the side, sipping some sort of absurdly strong Muggle alcohol and looking around.
An older boy came up to me. I immediately recognized him as Marcus Fudge, the son of the Minister For Magic. He put an arm around me and smoothly said, "I haven't seen you around here before. Where have you been all my life?"
I smiled. "Oh, you know... The library. This isn't exactly my scene, you know."
"What are you doing here, then?" He moved closer to me.
"Observing." He didn't smell like everyone else. His eyes weren't clouded with drink and he spoke like a politician. He obviously wasn't here for the party.
"Just like me!" He laughed softly. He looked down at my empty cup and frowned. "Would you like another drink? I was just thinking of getting one myself..." I nodded my head, still smiling. I hoped I was smiling in a flirty way. He took off in the direction of the makeshift bar. I spotted Catonia talking to another boy, laughing and smiling like he was telling her the greatest joke ever.
Marcus appeared from nowhere, drinks in tow. "Hey! So, I never got your name by the way."
"Oh... Natalia. I'm a fifth year," I lied. I crossed my fingers and hoped he wouldn't know better. "You?"
"Marcus. I'm a seventh year..." He stated, taking a sip of his drink. "Go on, drink up. We have a lot more talking to do."
I did as he said. This drink was even stronger than the last! The second it touched my lips I could feel myself getting numb. But stupid me kept drinking it. Marcus kept talking and I kept talking and I honestly couldn't tell you what we were talking about. All I know is it didn't last long and before I knew it I had agreed to go someplace private so we could hear each other better and that place was a secret room behind a tapestry and then it happened. He kissed me and I kind of kissed back. At this point my mind was fuzzy and I knew something wasn't right about the kiss. It was fierce and it hurt and I didn't like it. I tried pushing him away but he didn't stop. He didn't stop until he had gone past the point of no return and he left me behind that tapestry, crying and drunk and alone. I don't remember passing out, but I do remember waking up behind that ugly, awful tapestry with my pants across the tiny room and a headache like no other. I tried convincing myself that it didn't happen. It didn't happen and I dreamed it all. But everything hurt both inside and out. Emotionally and physically. I knew the truth whether I wanted to admit it or not.
I clothed myself and stumbled back to my common room in the early hours of Sunday. Dawn trickled through the windows upstairs, and fire light showed me the way in the dungeons. I made it back to the beautiful green sheets of my bed and passed out again.
Catonia woke me up this time. "Nathascha! Do you even know what time it is?! Where were you last night?! Did you meet anyone?!" She was bombarding me with questions and I didn't have the energy to talk. I wanted to curl up and die, and it wasn't because I was hungover.
I engaged her in small talk, never letting her know what had happened. I lied and said I got bored and went back to the common room to finish my homework. I could see it in her eyes that she knew I was lying, but she never questioned it. Maybe she should have. Maybe that would have stopped me from doing what I did, I could have talked about it and gotten it off my chest, but no...
****************Three years later****************
Three years had gone by since that. I convinced my parents to let me leave Hogwarts, and began teaching myself magic. They never found out why, but I think my mother secretly knew. It was the way she defended me when my dad refused to withdraw me. Something in her grey eyes told me she knew. After that, I never left my house. Catonia slowly stopped sending me letters when she learned I wasn't going to reply. I hadn't seen Marcus since that awful night.
The summer that Draco came home from his first year of Hogwarts, my parents threw a party. Most of the time I made a small show at their events to appease them. I would dress up and sip a few drinks and have some appetizers and mingle with the prestigious people they invited. But I always avoided the Minister. His face looked too much like Marcus', and the second I saw it I always had to leave. I would fake stomach aches or drowsiness or hell, the first time I saw him after that happened I puked all over the dining hall and everyone had to be escorted into the library to finish their social mingling.
Anyway, this social event was going to be a big one. Our house elf had spent a week preparing for it, and Draco and I were forced to wear the best clothes we had. Draco always loved our parties. He loved following our dad around and kissing ass just like he did. So I dressed into my best dress, a simple black dress that fell to my knees and clung to my hips just enough to not look too baggy. My long black hair was put up in a fancy do by my mother, and dark makeup to make my grey eyes look more intense. "You look so stunning," my mother told me as she hugged me from behind, our eyes locking in the mirror. We looked so similar, her and I, with our dark hair and high cheekbones.
"Thanks," I smiled. She was so lovely.
"You know, this is a very important night for your father. The Minster is going to be here tonight," She raised her eyebrows at the my frown. "And Nathascha, I would appreciate a favor from you."
"Yes, Mum?" I took a deep breath, her arms constricting me in a tighter hug.
She tugged me so that I would turn to face her and with her hand on my shoulder, she looked me in the eyes and said, "Nathascha, I want you to be strong. And I want you to stay the entire night. At least until the first people begin to leave. Please?"
I closed my eyes for a moment and nodded. "I'll do that for you."
"I love you Nathascha. See you at the party... Try not to be too fashionably late." And with that, she stepped out of the dressing room, floating down the hall in her magnificient green gown.
I probably spent a half hour sitting there, taking deep breaths and trying to calm myself down. I could do this, I could do this... I will do this.
"Hello, daughter!" My father smiled brightly when I stepped into the dining hall. He pulled me into a hug.
Draco pinched my cheeks, "Aren't you just so beautiful! And oh my my my, how rosy your cheeks are."
I slapped his hands away, "fuck off, Dragon." We joked and laughed some more while my dad made a comment to some higher up from the Ministry about how much he loved his family.
And then I saw him. Marcus fucking Fudge strolling around the buffet table, filling his plate.
Excusing myself, I tried to rush to the bathrooms, but he saw me. He fucking saw me. And he recognized me. He grabbed my arm, and I almost puked. "Natalia? Hey! I haven't seen you in forever." He smiled warmly."
I tore myself from his grasp. "Get the fuck away from me." I said through gritted teeth.
He raised his eyebrows and took a step closer. "What? Did I do something wrong?"
"You know what you did, you sick fuck." My hand reached for my wand.
"No, I don't." His smile turned colder. He was toying with me.
And then I snapped. I started shouting curses and stuff around me start exploding. People started screaming. Someone grabbed me around the middle and I threw a curse at them too. Another person disarmed me and they hit me with a spell that caused me to black out.