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On the Brink of Insanity by AlAndAl
Chapter 7 : To Kerf and Beyond
 
Rating: MatureChapter Reviews: 2


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                Ever since that fight with Robyn, things have just gone downhill for me. At first it was all right, because I had Albus keeping me company (which was absolutely swoon worthy), but after that awkward night in the library, things haven’t been so peachy. During Quidditch practice last week, Albus made me run laps like some sort of chump because I sneezed. Apparently I could infect the whole team with herpes or something… I didn’t really ask how that was possible. It was easy to tell that he wasn’t in a good mood and I wasn’t going to push my luck by questioning his STD accusation.

 


                On the up side, Robyn and Kerf are fighting. I know I said that I liked him and all, but I lied. I actually hate Kerf, always have, and now that they are in a slight disagreement (and by that I mean Robyn threw a potato salad at his head) I am simply overcome with delight. We’ll see how long this lasts… hopefully forever. MUAHAHAHAHA I’m evil.

 


                I was sitting in the common room when she first approached me, looking sheepish and upset. I ignored her with all my willpower, but thankfully, the silence didn’t last long and she began her apologetic monologue.

                “Alicia, I’m so sorry, I never meant to hurt you or yell at you I just got frustrated and then Kerf was eating that pie and you got so jealous and I just couldn’t help myself when you made that Sirius Black joke so I snapped, but don’t think I don’t love you. I do! So much! Almost as much as you love Al and nothing will ever change that, okay?” she spoke so fast that I could barely make out any words. Before I could open my mouth, I heard someone behind me.

                It was Ben. He had a look of disappointment across his face. I was confused as to why he was here, in the Slytherin common room, but before I could ask, he started to speak.

                “You love Al?” his voice was quiet, almost hurt.

                My inner panic mode initiated and I started to get hot. NO NO NO NO NO! HE WASN’T SUPPOSED TO FIND THAT OUT! EVER! THE ONLY ONE TO EVER KNOW IS ROBYN AND SHE JUST SAID IT OUT LOUD AND NOW I’M DEAD. DEAD I TELL YOU. LIKE THE SAILORS ON DAVY JONES’ SHIP, EXCEPT WITHOUT THE TENTACLE FACE.

                “No, Ben, that’s not what I meant,” Robyn said, but he didn’t seem to buy it.

                “Don’t lie to me, I know what you meant by it. Why didn’t you just tell me the truth before I asked you out?! Why did you string me along?! I thought you were being genuine!”

                “Ben, please!” I cried, “I did mean it! Every word! I really wanted to go on a date with you! I wanted to more than anything, even more than I wanted to dive into a tub of chocolate pudding!”

                Robyn gasped, “More than the pudding?!”

                I nodded, thinking my argument was pretty solid, considering the pudding tub was number one on my bucket list of life, but I don’t think Ben saw it in the same light.

                “You think this is a joke! I really cared about you and after all this time I find out that you like some pretty boy and I had absolutely no chance?! You’re a horrible person! Don’t ever speak to me again!” his screams echoed the room and he spun around and stomped out.

                There was a brief silence before I asked, “Who let him in?”

                No one answered, I think they were all scared that I was going to set their hair on fire or poop on their pillow prior to when they go to sleep, but I wasn’t. They didn’t know any better, it wasn’t their fault. Then a voice finally cascaded across the room.

                “I did.”

                I looked over to see Kerf waving his arm with a giant smile on his face.

 


                That was the day I assaulted Mike Hill.

 


                I got three months detention, a surprisingly low punishment. I originally thought that I was going to have to give up my first born to Professor McGonagall, but she refused my offer. I have to spend those detentions sorting flobberworms with Professor Old Fucker, just my luck. He looked pleased when he found out; I bet it’s that sadistic mind of his…sicko.

                Robyn also broke it off with Kerf. I think that was her final straw. She could no longer drink her milkshake with the bent, mutilated straws that Kerf offered, so he hit the road…literally.

                After his parents found out that I jumped at him like a wild orangutan and started to bit his leg, they didn’t feel like Hogwarts was safe for him anymore. I was pleased with the announcement, so I chucked a cherry pie at his face. My detention was originally two months long, the cherry pie upgraded it to three. It was worth it though. I had to get my torture in before he went to Durmstrang and picked up some bint named Haylee who has a TV forehead and horse teeth. Oh Kerf…

                I sat in the library, finishing up some homework when I saw Albus walk in. His eyes caught mind and he walked over and took the seat across from me.

                “Hey, I heard about Mike. Are you okay?” he asked. I tried not to laugh. Kerf had to get stiches and is being removed from Hogwarts and he was asking me if I was okay? It was a little odd, but I answered nonetheless.

                “I’m fine. He was just such a jerk to Robyn and I think I just had enough. He has mutilated too many of Robyn’s straws.”

                Al’s face contorted into a strange look and he began laughing, “Yeah, he did deserve it. He was my friend and all, but he was just eating that pie…”

                My head snapped up, “How did you find out about that?"

                Al smiled, “He told me you apparently freaked out because he was eating a pie and told me that you needed to calm down. I personally thought you had every right to be mad.”

                “You do?”

                “Absolutely! If someone was rude enough not to bring me pie, then I might have to kill them,” he said winking.

                We sat in a comfortable silence for a few minutes and I realized that I was no longer hyperventilating about the fact that Albus Potter was sitting right next to me. He was nearly TOUCHING MY HAND and I was barely freaking out. My pupils were probably dilated as hell, but it didn’t matter, because I highly doubt that eyeball dilation was on Al’s list of suspicious activity.

                I thought about Ben’s reaction, did he really like me that much? Or was it more of a hate for Al? In a way I didn’t care, because if someone can’t trust me, then they can get a move on! Mmmhhhm! That’s right girlfriend! You are a strong independent woman and you don’t need no man! This made me giggle, causing Al to give me an odd look.

                “Sometimes I really wish I could see what goes through your mind. You’re always laughing to yourself. Either you’re crazy or way funnier than you let on,” he said quietly. He stared at me for a few minutes and then stood up, “I guess I’ll see you tomorrow at practice…don’t be late, love.”

                HE CALLED ME ‘LOVE’! I WAS JUST KIDDING BEFORE, I AM TOTALLY FREAKING OUT. MARRY ME AL!

 

 




A/N: OMG I AM SO SORRY! This writers block has been horrible! Then school started and my birthday approached with a force of a billion men, so I've really just been dumb and lazy. I also apologize for the horrible quality of this chapter, it's such a filler and I sort of just got rid of so many characters in a short amount of time it's so overwhelming, but I felt bad about making you guys wait :( I hope you don't hate me, I'll try and get ch 8 up soon.

Allie
 


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