There, asleep next to him, was his best friend, Donald McLaggan. And neither of them were wearing anything. I stood there frozen on the spot, thinking. How long had this been happening? Why hadn’t he told me? I was so absorbed in my thoughts that I didn’t see my brother wake, and when he spoke, I jumped.
‘Lil-’
A sudden spasm of pain ran across my stomach when I jumped and I felt a wave of nausea sweep over me. I ran into the ensuite, only just making it in time. I felt a pair of hands sweep my hair out of my face and hold it out of the way. When I was able to look up I saw that he had managed to put some clothes on, thankfully.
‘Lil, are you OK?’
‘Yes, it’s just this stupid bug. I’m sorry; I expect you didn’t want that reaction…’
‘Well, I would’ve preferred it if you hadn’t been sick. That wasn’t me, was it? Please don’t hate me.’ Now, I should mention here that homosexuality isn’t a concept which is embraced by the wizarding world. In fact, many people still think it’s shameful. I still wish he had told me though, he should know that it wouldn’t bother me. I looked at him and saw a tear fall down his cheek. ‘I’m sorry Lil. What is wrong with me? Mum and Dad are going to disown me, James is going to be hard to bear, and I gross my sister out so much that she was physically sick!’
I wrapped my arms around him and pulled him in for a hug. ‘Stop being stupid! You don’t gross me out in the slightest: I’ve been throwing up all day. James will understand. And Mum and Dad won’t disown you!’ Actually, I don’t know that. To be honest, I don’t think that they will take the news well. It won’t help them at all once they find out that I’m pregnant, but that’s not important right now. ‘And you don’t have to tell them yet, anyway. But why didn’t you tell me? You should know that I don’t judge, that I’m supportive! I’ve been worried about you – you’ve been acting weird for a few months now.’
‘Shit, I’ve become careless! And I know I should’ve told you, Don kept telling me I should. And I was going to. I really didn’t want you to find out like this.’
‘Careless how?’
‘Yes. I’ve, um, … well I’ve been going out with Don for about 3 years now. Not once has anyone ever suspected anything. But as you say, you’ve thought I’ve been acting strangely for a while. We’ve always been cautious, always made sure that no-one caught us. Tonight, we were caught by you, and by that Malfoy boy.’ Oh! So that’s what he had seen earlier!
Should I tell Al about my pregnancy? Not now, I’m not ready yet. Maybe I should tell Scorpius first. I started to feel guilty then: he had been honest with me. I don’t know what to do: this whole situation is fucked up. I can’t keep my secret forever; people are going to find out later. And I’m scared, so scared. Can I raise a baby? I’m not sure, but I’m not sure I can get rid of it either.
‘I’m sorry, Lil.’ He pulled me in for a hug.
‘Don’t be. I’m sorry too.’
‘Why are you sorry?’
I didn’t answer; instead I just hugged him harder. This time, it was my tears which fell.
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