Chapter 1 : Tragedy
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I squeezed my eyes shut as hard as I could and opened them again.
Well, this wasn't supposed to happen.
I think I may have forgotten how to breathe. Maybe I'll die. That's just what I need. To die here in the bathroom, only to be discovered by my dormmates, lying on the floor holding a pregnancy test.
A positive pregnancy test.
How did this happen?
(Not literally. I know how this happened.) Why me? Oh, Merlin. We slept together once. One time. He was my first.
Shit. Shit. Shit
I groaned loudly, burying my face in my hands.
A baby. A fucking baby.
I'm sixteen. I'm still in Hogwarts. I have my N.E.W.Ts next year! I can't be pregnant. I just can't be. I knocked my head against the edge of the bath from my position on the floor. How could I possibly be such an idiot? I'd be an awful mother! I don't know the first thing about children.
I swallowed harshly, locking my hands between my knees. There was always the option of having it... 'dealt' with. I wouldn't even have to tell him. I had heard rumours of the abortion spell. It was quick and painless, I could have done and dusted within a few hours, this horrible situation would be cleared up and soon just be a distant memory of my idiotic teenage years.
I was never meant to be a mother. Children make me uncomfortable. I babysat for the muggle family next door once. Never again, I swear on Merlin's greasy back hair.
A sob escaped the back of my throat against my will.
I knew I was mainly feeding myself lies to try and soothe the shock. I suppose, deep down, I couldn't get rid of this baby... But I don't see how I could keep in either.
My meltdown is interrupted by a tentative knock on our shared bathroom door.
"Violet? Are you okay?" My dormmate, and best friend, Rose Weasley.
Rose knew me better than anyone. She would see straight through me instantly. I jumped up from the floor and dashed towards the sink. "Um, yeah! Out in a sec!" I struggled to keep my voice even as I splashed my face with cold water.
I glanced in the mirror. It was worse than I thought. My usually violet coloured eyes were wide and blood-shot, and the expression mirrored that of a scared mouse. (I know what you're thinking. My name is Violet and my eyes are violet. How very original. But according to my mother, my eyes were a neutral blue for the first few weeks after my birth, so it is pure coincidence.)
I tried to a few deep breaths to even out blotchiness of my face that always occurs after I cry, which isn't very often. My long dark brown hair was sticking up in weird directions at the top of my head, as if I had been raking my hands through it. Which I had.
I continued my soothing breaths to try and calm myself, panting stupidly as I willed my face to return to normal.
"Vi? Unless you are out of there within thirty seconds, I am Bombarda Maxima-ing your ass out of there." Rose sounded worried.
"Relax, will you? I'm on the loo!" I lied, glancing at my face again and pointing my wand at my hair, trying my best to smooth it out.
"Twenty! Nineteen! Eighteen!" Rose shouted sarcastically at me through the door.
Sighing, I pulled the chain on the toilet, giving myself a final look in the mirror. Apart from the obvious worry and torment in my eyes, my face looked normal, I noticed with relief. I adjusted my hair so it hung down just past my rib cage as usual, tucked the test into the inside pocket of my Gryffindor robes, and exited the bathroom into my dorm.
Rose was standing outside the bathroom with a concerned look on her face. I put all my effort into trying to look indifferent. I practically saw her brain going one hundred miles and hour as she looked into my eyes.
I fought as hard as I could not to break down in sobs and tell her everything about the tests.
The positive tests.
She sighed, seemingly realising if something was truly wrong with me, I would tell her. But I knew I couldn't, no matter how badly I wanted to.
She would tell him.
"Look, guys! 'How to know he's the one- is it true love or just lust? Take this quiz and find out!'" I pulled my eyes away from her intense gaze to look at Ruby who was lying on her stomach on her bed reading Witch Weekly.
Ruby was definitely one of my closest friends. Not as close as Rose and I, but still close enough. She's the only one who knows about what happened between me and him.
It was all her fault really.
It was the start of October. We had only been back at school for about a month, and it was the first trip to Hogsmeade of the year. Ruby and I had spilt up from Rose who had run off it look at quills and books and stuff. Yawn.
We decided to head to the three broomsticks for a drink. Frankly, I couldn't wait. Jeremy and I had broken up during the summer after six months together. What kind of guy dumps a girl just because she wasn't ready to have sex with him yet?
An utter douche, that's who.
It was with this mindset that Ruby and I sat at a tiny table in the middle of the hustle and bustle of other Hogwarts students drinking. Butter beer, in the cases of the young and the goody-goodies. Normally I would do the same.
Not this evening.
I was snapped out of my flashback by a pillow being thrown at my face. As I yanked it away, it was fairly obvious who had been the one to throw it.
"Rose" I muttered venomously.
Giggling, Rose picked up the second pillow from Ruby's bed, where she had joined Ruby to read about the quiz. I screeched out something resembling a battle cry as I dived for the closet weapon, which just so happened to be a pillow from Alex's bed, which was the one closest to the bathroom. I ran at Rose and began to hit her as she squealed and tried to escape.
Ruby then came to Rose's defence and hit me across the face with a teddy bear.
Oh no she didn't.
Together, the three of us screamed and laughed and beat each other with pillows, until the room was bathed in feathers.
The door burst open to reveal Alex standing there looking confused. We all stopped mid-war. Literally.
I had my hands above my head clutching the pillow, about to slam it down on Ruby who was on the floor amongst the feathers. Ruby's face was still holding an expression of fear, as I'm sure mine still held an emotion that can only be described as victory.
All was silent for a moment.
As we all stayed still, as if we were playing an insane version of 'statues', that muggle party game. Alex looked at all of us for a moment before grabbing a towel and whipping it at Rose who was standing on her bed (the one nearest the door) where she was previously cheering me on.
We all burst into laughter and began attacking each other again.
About an hour later, we were getting into bed when Misdana (or Missy as we call her) came into our room for the night. She sighed when she saw the state of our room and with a quick wave of her wand, the room was returned to it's former condition.
Missy wasn't the greatest of friends with the four of us, she usually preferred to keep company with the Ravenclaws of our year, but we all got along well.
I roughly pulled the curtains around my bed shut, shouting a quick goodnight in the general direction of the four girls in the room. They all called back their farewells as I lay back on my pillow with a sigh.
And it was as I snuggled down in my covers, preparing to go to sleep, when my thoughts drifted to him as usual, that I remembered the tests.
The positive tests.
Well... that's it! This is my very first story, so I'm a little nervous. Please leave a review and let me know what you think :)
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