So if you’re wondering, I have decided that Albus Severus Potter is a tosser. You may ask how I can go from loving the bloke to hating him in only three weeks, but and let me tell you, just because I hate him doesn’t mean I don’t worship the ground he walks on. Anyway, love and hate are two extremely close emotions which are constantly mixed up. So yeah, I’m mixing it up! Well, actually it’s all his fault… okay, so you’re probably getting bored of hearing this by now but it’s true! It is! After the incident which I have dubbed the “near-miss-kiss” the arsehole has said about eight words to me. In fact I know it’s eight words. I counted. These eight words include “excuse me”, “where’s Rose?” and the wonderful statement of “Get me a butterbeer!” If you’re wondering when the final statement occurred it was on the Hogsmeade trip last week. I was getting the drinks in and boom! Not even a please or thank you. What does he think I am? His bitch. So now I have decided with the help from my girls that Al is a dick!
I mean what sort of guy almost kisses you and then decides to ignore you and be unnecessarily rude? Okay maybe he wasn’t out rightly rude but I still think ignoring a girl you almost kissed is rude! You’re probably thinking that I need to try harder to get him talking, you’re thinking he’s just scared and nervous. Well… you’re forgetting he’s a Slytherin! Plus he’s a Potter! Nervous and scared just don’t go with those personality traits! I have tried, but each time the bastard just glares at me. Yeah that’s right just glares!
Take last week for instance, in Hogsmeade. So there I was walking back to our table – which was huge because of it being full up with Wotter’s (Hence the appearance of Albus) – I come back with the butterbeers (five of them, it was a nightmare!) and sit down opposite him. I try to strike up conversation by mentioning the Chudley Cannons – which are the team he supports – and what does he do but get up and move. I mean I was trying to talk to him and the boy just looks at the ground, gets up and shuffles to the other side of the table. The arsehole didn’t even have the decency to look me in the eye as he did it!
Anyway, back to the present. I’m getting totally off subject. Everything has taken a turn for the worse. Which leads me back to the present moment. In which I am trying and failing horrifically to produce a bloody patronus! I mean I’m not even getting a whisp of silver! Life just bloody hates me, doesn’t it? Want to know the worst part? Because trust me, it gets worse. Albus – also known as slimy git face - happens to be in this class. The truly horrific thing is that currently he’s leaning (in a very sexy way) against the wall whilst his bloody Patronus bounces around him like it’s on drugs. Stupid bloody reindeer! I can’t help but give the thing evils. It’s just too bouncy – I wish I could stamp on it like a giant bug! Shouldn’t it be helping Santa out or something!
If I do, by some miracle, end up managing to produce a patronus, I’d put my money on it being something awful. The inner animal in me is probably a chicken or worse a slug. Yes a slug. My patronus, if I ever manage to produce one, will be a slug, I am sure of it! Sod it. Now I’m starting to feel jealous of that prick and his reindeer.
“I hate this class” I growled at Rose. What can I say, she’s my best mate, if I’m going to suffer then she is too. Hey, I’m not being selfish. She’d do the same, it’s expected!
“Why are getting so worked up about it? I can’t do it either yet. It’ll come” she said, although in my opinion she didn’t look that confident. I can’t say I blame her. Defence is my worst class. Ever.
“At least you got the whispy thing! I can’t even do that. Think of it this way, if I ever get attacked by dementors, I’m screwed!” Which is true when you think about it, you can’t exactly stun them, can you? Well to be honest, I’m not exactly sure I’d be able to manage that either. Like I said I’m shit at defence.
“Well, maybe you just need to put some more effort in? If you tried a bit harder, what’s your happy memory?” She asked. Now here was the question I was hoping she didn’t ask because it was quite frankly probably where my problem laid. It’s hard to think of happy memories just like that.
“Umm, can you remember that time we got locked out of the castle in the first week and ended up wandering around outside for about two hours until Minnie found us?” I asked. You may be thinking what the fuck? But it’s not actually as bad as it sounds. It was our first week in first year and it was when we seriously bonded! Unfortunately although a happy memory, it didn’t fill me up with happiness the way a memory that you use for a patronus probably should…
“Well, although I loved our bonding session, don’t you think it’s a bit weak? Surely you’ve got something better than that?” Rose said as she continued to produce whisps of silver from her wand. Personally I was feeling a little offended, my memory was one of the defining moments of “Roya” as we liked to call ourselves in our first year.
“Well if mine’s so rubbish, then what are you using?” I asked back, what can I say, I’m a noisy friend. Deal with it!
“First day of Hogwarts, you know getting on the train and meeting you and the girls, pretty much the best and most awkward train ride ever.” She said in a rather impressive tone. I have to admit that was a good one.
“I suppose that is a bit better than mine… Merlin! Why does it have to be so fucking hard, to do one little bit of magic?!” I shouted out rather more aggressively and loudly than I meant to. In other words not only was I totally failing but I was also looking like a complete idiot. Great.
“Just ask yourself something. When you’re miserable, like really miserable, what do you think about to make you keep going? What makes you carry on?” Rose murmured.
This caused me to think. Because at the end of the day, what is it that makes me, well me? I suppose in a way it’s my friends, they make me keep fighting but if it’s not that then what else? Then it hit me. Even when I hate him he’s still at the forefront of my mind and he might not be able to remember it but three weeks ago was not the first time he tried to kiss me. Whenever I’m truly miserable I think about him. I think about that kiss. I think about what it was like, even in our intoxicated state to feel his lips against mine, hot and rough and yet just so amazingly perfect. The way his tongue ran along my lower lip and the way his hands were tangled in my hair. It was far from perfect to an outsider but for me, well it was my perfect moment. I felt myself drowning in it and bellowed
At which a beautiful doe glided across the classroom halting right before the group of Slytherins which were currently surrounding the main object of my memory. Before I even had the chance to notice the reactions around me Professor Teague was right beside me.
“Oh my! Miss Parker! Excellent work, ten points to Gryffindor for a beautiful patronus” He said before gliding off. If I wasn’t pleased before I certainly was now, she hadn’t given Albus points for his patronus. Mwhahaha!
“Anya! Oh My God! That was amazing, she’s gorgeous” Rose said whilst looking over at my doe who was currently moving back towards us.
“I know” I said and for once in my life I just couldn’t think of anything else to say. I had actually managed to do something right in this class! I snuck a glance over towards Al who was looking currently looking at my doe. My Doe! Eeeek! Anyways, back to the subject. He just stood their staring at it before eventually casting his own patronus one last time which went to stand in front of my gorgeous doe. Which was the moment realisation hit me. That’s no bloody reindeer. It’s a flipping stag. We match.
Throughout the next couple of days Rose continued to tell everyone about my doe patronus. Normally I wouldn’t mind, in fact normally I would feel rather proud and probably be the one to tell everyone but after realising that my patronus matched Al’s I’d been trying to avoid the subject, as well as avoiding him. Avoiding him was in fact quite easy as we were at this point both doing it. It was simple, we instigated the rule of NO TABLE SWAPPING. This you see was a norm for us and where we are most likely to see each other. Therefore the rule made perfect sense. I’d love to say that loads of people noticed the difference but that would be a lie. To be honest we just went back to how we were before the start of the year. The only people who seemed to notice were the girls. Though this didn’t help much as although Rose had apparently spoken to Al she wouldn’t tell me anything! The bitch is supposed to be my best mate yet she tells me nothing! Grrr!
Anyway back to the present where I’m curled up on a sofa in the Room of Requirement eating Cauldron Cakes and trying to forget about my misery. Did I mention I’m failing terribly? Really I should be getting back to the girls and an awful essay which Chang wants in by Friday, but I’ve decided that I’m just too miserable to do homework. Damn you evil Angst! Anyway, so yeah, I’m getting fat alone. You should feel extremely sorry for me. I need sympathy … and maybe a few more cakes wouldn’t go a miss…
“Anya” I heard a voice behind me mumble which caused me to immediately step out of my daydream about cauldron cakes. Did I mention they’re my favourite? Well they are. Unfortunately turning around to look at the person who the voice belonged to was a decision I instantly regretted.
“Albus” I said whilst trying to force myself up from the immensely squidgy sofa. Well this is awkward…
“I saw your patronus.” No shit Sherlock. Really? Would never had of guessed. Okay, maybe I should stop the sarcasm.
“It was impressive, I always thought you were shit at defence, no offence.” He continues as he smiled rather cheekily at me. Okay, what is with this boy. One second he’s avoiding me like I’m the bloody plague and the next he’s talking to me like nothing happened.
“Look, what do you want? Because I’m pretty sure it’s not to talk about how crap I am at defence.” I snapped back at him. You can’t really blame me. The boy’s been ignoring me for over three weeks after almost kissing me. What sort of message does he think that sends to a girl?
After a rather long pause and an equally long sigh he finally spoke up “I’m sorry, okay? I like you Anya, you’re brilliant but … well the owlery thing was a mistake and I just want to get rid of all this awkwardness.” He grumbled whilst looking down at his feet.
“Oh, umm, I feel the same way” the lie was out of my mouth before I’d even thought twice about it. The truth was that I was hurt. Really hurt. The only mistake about the near-miss-kiss in the owlery was that. The fact it was a near-miss. But I am a Gryffindor and there is no way in hell that I’m going to let him think that I’m a weak pathetic little girl who’s going to beg on her knees for his attention. That and the fact that I don’t think my pride would ever recover.
“Oh, I mean good … friends?” he asked whilst running a hand through his hair which made him instantly look a little more like his brother and dad for that matter.
“Yeah… Friends” I said whilst demonstrating my best fake smile. You know the one you safe for those really awful family gatherings where you’re Great Aunt Gertrude starts asking you about your non-existent love life.
After a rather awkward moment of tension I left Al in the Room of Requirement and headed back to the Gryffindor tower and my dormitory, where I climbed into bed, still in my school uniform, and promptly cried myself to sleep.
A/N – I’m guessing that people are hating on Al right now? Well don’t hate him too much; this is part of his character development. You’ll find out the reason he’s being such a douche later on, I promise! I feel so bad for Anya! Anyway, hope you enjoyed.