Everything after the party was even more confusing. I wanted Draco more than ever, but I also didn't want him even more than when I first met him. I hated these conflicted feelings. But what I hated even more was that he knew I was conflicted, and he was using that weakness against me.
"Guess what I'm thinking of." Draco whispered in my ear. I still had not gained control over my blushing.
"What?" I breathed.
"Your soft lips on mine. Your hands touching me. The feel of your body against mine." Suddenly I felt his hands on me and I could feel him moving closer. Why did I agree to us studying alone in some abandoned classroom?
Draco was turning me around to face him, his hands slipping around my waist, his face moving closer by the second. At the last possible moment, I turned my face away. He sighed and rested his head on mine.
"Sloane, love, why do you do this to me?" He asked. "You let me come so close and then back out at the last moment. Why?"
"Because I'm not giving in to you so easily." I said. "I told you before, I'm not like your little groupies. You have to work for my affection, not the other way around."
"I love that about you." He said pressing me against the table. "I love how you make me work for it. That will make winning you over so much more worth it."
"Why do you like that?" I asked confused.
"First of all, I love it, not like it." I rolled my eyes. "Second of all, I've never had to work for anything in my life. This is the first thing. And I find it so...exciting. I get this insane thrill in trying to get you. And when I get you, I'll finally know what's it like to have my hard work pay off."
"So you like the chase?" I asked.
"Yes." Draco grinned. "Though sometimes I wish you would allow me a kiss or something. You turn me on so much that sometimes I can't control myself. There are moments where I have to touch you and all I can think about is kissing you. I'm having a moment like that now."
Draco was pressing me against the table so much, I was forced to sit on it. He stood between my legs, his hands on my thighs. His gaze was so intense, it was pulling me towards him.
I managed to fight the feeling. I cleared my throat. "We really should be focusing on Charms."
"I have a one track mind. I can only focus on one thing at a time." He said. It didn't take a genius to know I was that one thing.
"So, maybe you should only focus on Charms then." I suggested.
He sighed, although he was smiling. "Soon this hard to get routine will become a bore for you."
"Nah, I don't see that happening anytime soon." I said. "But it might become boring for you, don't you think?"
"Not a chance." He laughed leaning in to kiss me.
I rolled my eyes and gave him a light shove. "Back to studying, Malfoy." I said.
"I love a woman who takes control." He said smirking as he backed away from me.
"Yeah?" I asked. "Well, I love a man who can listen. Especially when I say no. Looks like you're not my type."
"That's all right. I can make you sway and persuade you to love my type." Draco said confidently.
"Yeah, we'll see about that." I whispered.
I was still with him. He still hadn't gotten any better. He quit drinking for about two weeks, and then he was right back to it. I didn't leave like I always swore to myself I would. There was no point in leaving when I knew I'd just come right back, that would be a waste of time and tears.
I was always careful around him, even when he was his real self. I had gotten into the habit of, and it couldn't stop. We always did what he wanted, though sometimes I would have to convince him it was what I wanted when it wasn't. I did whatever I had to to keep him happy. I'd laugh and smile around him, when really all I wanted to do was cry.
I convinced myself I was happy with him, because that's what I wanted so desperately. To be happy with him. To feel loved by him, to feel safe with him. I felt none of that. What I felt with him was fear. Fear he would find out what he's like when he drinks,fear he could snap at any moment, fear he would leave me.
He was dragging me away forcefully. No one seemed to notice. "What the hell was that all about?" He growled once he got me alone. The fear of him snapping invaded my body.
"What was what about?" I asked in a small voice.
"Why were you talking to him?! Are you cheating on me or something?" He asked angrily.
"What? No!" I said.
"He was flirting with you, I could tell." He said.
"Ethan is your best friend, he would never do that."
"How do you know that?" He asked.
"Because I know him." I said. "He would never betray your friendship like that."
"I don't like the way he was looking at you." He stated.
"You don't like the way any guy looks at me." I pointed out. It was a risky statement, but it was times like this where I couldn't control myself.
"That's because they're all trying to steal you away. They're trying to take you from me."
"No one is trying to take me away!" I protested.
"I don't want you talking to him anymore." He said.
"Excuse me?" I asked.
"You heard me. Stay away from him."
"I am not going to do whatever you say. You don't own me." I said walking away. I didn't even care that there was a possibility I would pay for that later.
I looked down at my watch. Where the hell was he? What part of 'meet me at twelve' didn't he understand? I sat on a desk waiting anxiously. Maybe he wasn't coming, maybe he was finally tired of the chase.
I couldn't blame him, I had taken so long to give into my feelings for him. But at least I finally gave in, I should get some credit for that.
Just as I was about to give up hope, I heard the doorknob turning. I know it's him. A smile comes across my lips as the tall blonde figure slips into the classroom locking the door.
"What kept you Malfoy?" I asked in silky voice.
"I had to make sure this was for real and you weren't playing with me or something." He said quietly as he made his way towards me.
"Are you satisfied in finding out this is for real?" My voice was barely above a whisper.
"Very satisfied." He answered as a sly smile slid across his lips. He was now infront of me. His hands crept up my thighs, he stood in between my legs, and he brought his face closer.
I hesitated for a second. "What?" He asked. "This is what you want, isn't it?"
"Yes." I said quickly. Again he brought his face closer, and this time I didn't hesitate. I was hit with ecstasy when our lips touched. At that moment I knew I had made the right choice in giving in to him.
"Mmm." Draco moaned as he wrapped his arms around me tightly. He was holding me tighter, kissing me harder, and I was loving every second of it.
He pushed against me, causing me to lay back on the table, he was on top of me, his hands gliding smoothly over my body, making me shiver with pleasure. No one had ever touched me like this.
His hands came between us, and he started unbottoning my shirt...
I sat up as I woke with a start. I sighed in relief as I realized it was just a dream. I wasn't in an abadoned classroom getting down and dirty with Draco Malfoy, I was safely in my bed.
"Bad dream?" A voice asked next to me.
I turned and smiled at the mess of blonde hair next to me. "Something like that." I said.
Draco pulled me down to him. "Let me comfort you then, hmm?" He asked. I nodded, knowing his idea of comforting wasn't just hugging.
He kissed me passionately, and I responded back immediately. My hands ran down his bare chest as he pulled me on top of him. His hands stayed on my bare back, holding me and making me stay there. As if I'd want to go anywhere else, I was in heaven.
He gently rolled on top of me, and traced kisses down my neck. I tilted my head back, giving him full access.
"Make love to me Draco." I whispered.
"Anything you want." He whispered back and then he kissed my lips again...
I wake up suddenly, breathing lightly. I'm much too calm for someone who just dreamt about Malfoy twice. I look around wildly, making sure I'm alone in my bed. I sighed in relief.
"Who were you dreaming about?" Hermione's voice asked.
I looked over at her. "No one." I said.
"It was Malfoy, wasn't it?" She asked.
"What makes you think that?" I asked.
"You said his name." She smirked.
Since when do I talk in my sleep?! "All right, fine, it was Draco." I admitted.
"Tell me what happened!" She exclaimed.
I quietly (so other girls wouldn't hear) explained the dreams to her. "You guys were naked in bed together?!"
"Yes, but it was just a dream." I said.
"And you told him to make love to you."
"Okay, I can't explain that one." I said looking down.
"You like him." Hermione said.
"No, I can't." I whined. "How could I like him?"
"I don't know, but how else can you explain having dreams like that about him?" She asked.
"It was that stupid party. If we hadn't hooked up, I wouldn't be dreaming about him."
"We both know you felt something before the party." She said knowingly.
"Stupid fine between love and hate!" I muttered. "If it was thicker shit like this wouldn't happen!" I was determined to blame anyone or anything but myself for my feelings for Draco.
But deep down, I knew no matter what I would have eventually fallen for Draco Malfoy. That didn't mean I was going down without a fight.
At breakfast that morning, I received my usual letter from Kale, only it didn't say all the usual things, like how's it going and things are great. No, this one was serious.
I want to talk to you about something serious. Us. I know we're far away from eachother, but for me, that's okay, as long as I can call you mine. I don't exactly know what happened to us before, I don't understand why you left, but I don't care. I'm more than willing to try again, as I've said so many times before. It's your choice, I'll do whatever you want me to. Please just give me one more chance. That's all I ask. Either way, I can't wait to see you for holidays. I love you.
I smiled down at the letter. When I looked up, I caught Draco's eye. Suddenly everything was clear. If I got back with Kale, there would be no way I'd be tempted to be with Draco. I could save myself from the inevitable pain Draco would cause me.
I quickly got out a piece of parchment, and scribbled down my response, which was yes to another try.
Later that day, I was headed back to the common room. I had just received another letter from Kale. We were getting back together,but not officially until holidays. I looked down at the ground smiling, when I looked up my blonde nightmare was coming towards me.
"I was hoping run into you." Draco said.
"And why is that?" I asked, leaning casually against the wall.
"So I could do this." He kissed me, completely catching me off guard.
"My boyfriend will not like this." I whispered.
He raised his eyebrows. "Since when do you have a boyfriend?"
"Well, it's not official yet, but I'm getting back with my ex. Not Harry." I added in.
"I don't like this topic, I'm changing it. Are you staying here for holidays? I am." He said.
"No, I'm going to stay with my boyfriend. That's when we make it official." I smirked.
"Is there a chance I can win you over before that?" Draco asked.
"In your dreams." I whispered, smiling.
"And in yours?" He asked. I just stared at him frozen. How did he know I dreamt about him?
A smile came across his face. "You actually do dream about me!"
"I-I do not. It was j-just a-" He cut off my stuttering with a sweet kiss.
"What was I doing in your dream?" He asked.
"That." I breathed.
"Well, now I can make your dream a reality." He kissed me gently at first, but as the kiss deepened, he kissed me harder. I don't know why I couldn't bring myself to stop. Maybe because I wanted this...
"This doesn't change anything." I said afterwards. "I'm still getting back with Kale."
"And I'm still going to chase after you. You're not getting rid of me so easily." Draco said.
"Good night Draco." I said. He snuck a kiss again and smirked. I pushed him lightly and started walking away.
"Sweet dreams, Sloane." He called. "I'll see you there." I could hear him chuckling.
"More like in my nightmares." I called back. My very beautiful nightmares, that is.