Chapter 1 : Mondays—The Origin of All Evil
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By the amazing Princess_of_Slytherin!
I hate Mondays.
Because they’re the origin of all evil. Monday means getting up early, staggering into the hallways half asleep, looking like a zombie (Ha! And you thought Rose’s hair was bad enough), and worse of all, meeting up with Albus friggin’ Potter.
Yeah, yeah, “The Chosen One’s” son, I get it, I get it.
In other words, basically the entire female population of Hogwarts is drooling and begging at his bloody feet, for Merlin’s sake!
They’re just a bunch of bimbos.
And I, Nicole Cassandra Davis the third, solemnly swear that I will try my very, very best to keep out of that category no matter what it costs me.
So far, I’ve been fine.
The path to my success?
Keep away from him, don’t make eye contact, don’t glance at him, don’t go ‘omnomnom’ and eat his face, and most of all, DO NOT LET HIM KNOW THAT YOU EXIST.
Unfortunately, all of those tricks have failed me three years ago when I made the fatal mistake of becoming best friends with Rose Weasley.
Yeah, yeah, Hermione and Ron’s daughter, I get it, I get it.
In other words, like I explained earlier with stupid Al, the entire male population of Hogwarts is drooling and begging at her feet!
It’s totally and utterly disgusting.
And it’s not that I’m jealous….
Or, rather, maybe I’m slightly jealous…
No, it’s more like I’m kind of jealous….
Oh, sod it all, I’m jealous.
I mean, really, why won’t anybody go for me?
Wouldn’t it be so much easier than to go for a girl (ahem, Rose, I’m looking at you) who already had three boyfriends already and dumped all of them within a two week period?
I mean, really! She can’t even keep a stable relationship!
So why won’t anybody go for me? Besides the obvious, of course.
I’m fiery-tempered, stubborn, witty, as charming as a dead slug, and have the nightmare of all hair (it’s a huge accomplishment that I can even manage to put my hair up into braids every single bloody day)!
What’s not to love?
Um, yeah, right.
Back to the point.
I really, really hate Mondays.
Don’t you even dare make me relist all the reasons why.
Oh, sod it all, and Merlin save me.
Alert, alert: stupid Albus Potter walking down the hall with his entire posse.
Somebody kill me already.
No, actually, don’t…That would kind of hurt, wouldn’t it?
Somebody put me in permanent coma already! He’s getting within ten feet of me! Hurry up!
Luckily, no one needed to put me in coma, because I found a different way to die: of embarrassment. I somehow managed to find the coordination to walk away, slip on a banana peel, do a lopsided dance, flail my arms around, make my books go flying (I do believe one hit Professor Neville…oops), and land right on my arse.
Am I not amazing?
Please note the sarcasm.
"Merlin.” I heard somebody choke back laughter. “That was quite a show, Nikki.”
"Oh, would you just shut up!” I snapped furiously, trying to regain my footing, but slipped again on the broken, slimy remains of yellow gooeyness.
"Oh, damn it!” I yelled, rubbing my hip. I whipped around to see Albus and an entire crowd behind him laughing their bloody heads off.
"Stop laughing, you unimaginable bastards!” I shouted heatedly. “It is not funny!”
"If you say so, Davis.” He smiled a lopsided smile, and I heard five girls sigh dreamily simultaneously.
I groaned. “Where’s Rose?” I asked him grouchily.
"Oh, is somebody having a bad day?” he teased. “Poor, poor little Nikki…” Ten hawk-like glares were shot at me before his last remark was even finished.
"Shut up, Albus.” I growled, still rubbing my hip. “I’m going to find Rose with or without your help, so if you’re feeling rude—“
"I do believe she’s snogging Zach Wood right now.” He interrupted nonchalantly. “Now excuse me, Nikki,” his voice became deeper and more pleasant. “Natasha Benson, twelve o’ clock.” Al saluted me, grinning sheepishly, and eagerly walked over to the giggling brunette.
He is such an idiotic flirt.
Natasha Benson, girl, stop drooling and ogling Albus before you choke on your own saliva.
Oh, Merlin’s pants! Albus, give Natasha some space to breathe!
I turned away from the sight, my stomach churning, and immediately saw my cousin, Teddy Lupin, standing in front of me. Silently, he wiggled his eyebrows and pointed at a couple snogging each others’ faces off. Ew.
Oh, wait, that’s Rose.
I gagged, and he laughed good-heartedly.
"Can’t go a week without another boy hanging on to her every word.” He whispered, his eyes gleaming merrily.
"Ha! More like a day.” I argued, nudging him.
Teddy grinned. “Go on.” He pushed me towards Rose. “Interrupt them while I handle Albus there. Besides, breakfast starts in a little while, anyway.” he snorted and glanced backwards. I refused to look behind my shoulder.
"What’s he doing now?” I groaned.
He laughed. “Either snogging or doing CPR on her. Choose your pick. Be right back, Nikki.” Teddy winked at me and strolled over to Natasha and Al. I let out a sigh and jogged over to Rose. Impatiently, I shook Rose’s shoulders, separating her from Zach.
"Sorry to break things up over here,” I rolled my eyes. “Breakfast starts in fifteen minutes.”
"Alright, thank you, Nikki.” She said brightly, beaming at Zach. “See you later, Zach.” I rolled my eyes again.
Once we walked a suitable distance away, Rose whispered happily, “I think he’s the one!”
My eyes went skyward. “That’s exactly what you say every time.” I answered dryly.
"No,” she protested, a blush starting to tint her cheeks red. “I do not!”
I shrugged. “Sure.”
She was going to retort when she frowned. “Hey, isn’t that Al walking with Nata—“
"Yup.” I replied dryly. “You and Zach weren’t the only ones eating each other’s faces, you know.” Rose blushed even more deeply.
"Well, I do feel happy for her.” She said, veering away from the topic. "She’s been waiting on Al for years now.”
I sniffed disdainfully. “I hope they marry and have ugly children.”
"Nikki!” she scolded while trying to hold back giggles. “How is it even possible for Natasha to have ugly children?” she laughed. “I mean, really, she’s gorgeous.”
I let out a loud “Ha!” and Rose smirked.
"Oh, is someone a little green?” she smiled.
"Never in your wildest dreams.” I blew up my bangs.
"I totally believe you.” She said sarcastically, snickering. I punched her lightly on the arm, and we walked on in silence until I felt somebody tap me on the shoulder.
"What?” I turned around and came face to face with a certain grinning Potter. “Oh, sod off, Al! Go back and keep Natasha company or whatnot.”
"Is somebody feeling a little bit grouchy today, Nikki?” he smirked. "Hey, Rose.”
"Al.” she said unpleasantly.
"Oh, two grouchy ladies!” he wiggled his eyebrows and smirked (Rose had the brains to run away once she saw him smirk). “Guess I’m going to have to fix that, huh?”
The next thing I knew was that I was five feet in the air being levitated by a totally untrustworthy bastard. “Albus Severus Potter!” I screamed. "PUT—ME—DOWN—THIS—INSTANT!” He paid no mind and continued lifting and dropping me.
Why doesn’t anybody listen to me?
"Albus!” he flipped me onto my stomach. “Stop it!”
Al looked up at me and grinned mischievously. He swished his wand carelessly, and I plummeted down to the ground so quickly that my breath was knocked out of me as soon as I hit the concrete. I continued lying on the floor, trying to take in the pain by breathing hard and attempting not to choke.
I felt my face heat up tremendously, but I still scrambled up to my feet courageously. “You,” I spat out nastily at him, glaring. “You are the most despicable, unpleasant, inconsiderate, thoughtless, and basically the vilest person I know!” I turned away stupidly and was idiotically surprised (and slightly angry) when he didn’t follow me.
Do not laugh.
I miserably walked on to the Great Hall, where small crowds were already starting to form.
"Oh, Nikki.” I heard Teddy sing-song. “It’s so depressing to see a frown on such a pretty face.”
"Hardy har har.” I replied drily. “Nice one, Teddy.”
He laughed, his eyes twinkling, and asked, “Well, what happened to you, then?”
"Confidential.” I said sourly.
"Ah, the secrecy.” He smiled. “I bet it has to do with a certain Albus Potter.”
"Absolutely not.” I answered much too quickly, and he caught my bluff.
"Ah.” He nodded knowingly. “Okay, what did he do to you this time?”
"This time, huh?” I exploded. “Well, I really don’t know. How’s lifting me a few feet above the air, publicly humiliating me, and then dropping me on the ground in a reckless manner as a answer?”
"Yowie.” He pursed his lips, trying to conceal his laughter. I elbowed him to be quiet and glared even harder at my shoes.
"You are a horrible confidant.” I snapped.
"Whoah!” Teddy put up his arms in surrender. “Don’t you go all snappy with me. Save that anger for Al, for Merlin’s sake, Nikki.” I let out a sigh.
"Awww, does somebody need a hug?” he simpered, prodding me with his finger. I smiled. That question always did the trick.
I launched myself at him, and he chuckled, “Hey, hey, easy there, superwoman.” He patted my hair for a while and finally released me. "Better?” he grinned.
"A bit.” I shrugged, smiling.
"Oh, that’s good.” Somebody behind me laughed.
"Al-bus.” I gritted my teeth, but didn’t turn around.
"Nikki, m’darling.” His accent was inevitably hilarious, and a smile escaped my lips. “Turn around, sweetheart.” Al twirled rotated my shoulders, spinning me towards him.
I resisted a giggle. “Sweetheart?” I raised my eyebrows, trying to manage an annoyed expression.
He opened his mouth to say something, but was promptly interrupted by Rose’s overly energetic voice (of course her voice is energetic! She didn’t get publicly harassed, did she? No, I don’t think so).
"Hi!” she chirped, dragging us to the tables and plopping us down. “Dig in, guys!” she shoved part of a pancake into her mouth.
"Oh, alright, alright.” I grumbled, staring at the empty plate in front of me.
"Mm, here.” Al said with his mouth full, heaping a pile of potatoes, macaroni, and bread onto my dish.
"I’m capable of getting my own food, you know.” I said dryly, picking up a fork. He snorted.
"Somebody who is incapable of walking without face-planting herself is capable of getting her own food. Interesting…” Albus slowly munched his food, contemplating it all. Then, he swallowed and broke out into a grin. “Nah, that’s physically impossible.”
I smacked his head.
Natasha made her entrance and sat down next to Rose.
"Hi, guys.” She said, blushing and giggling a bit while peeking at Al. Her voice dropped into a whisper. “Guess who’s taking me to Hogsmeade today?” Natasha giggled some more.
Rose feigned surprise and utter joy and gasped, “No!” she glanced over at Albus.
"Yup.” She grinned, revealing a row of perfectly straight, white teeth. "Oh, there’s no possible way I can wait a few more hours!” she squealed passionately, making Rose laugh.
"I’m happy for you, Natasha!” Rose secretly smirked at me, and I glared back.
I glumly munched/ glowered at my food, propping my chin up with my hand.
"Hey, Nikki, are you okay?” Natasha frowned with concern. “You look a bit down.”
Merlin, I hate how she’s always so nice.
WHY IS SHE SO BLOODY PERFECT????!!!
"I’m fine, don’t you worry about me.” I said brightly, sarcasm dripping from my words like poison. Rose snickered and wiggled her eyebrows, but I ignored her.
"Oh, okay then, alright.” She smiled, totally buying it. Natasha turned back to Rose. “Oh, I have no idea what to wear….”
THERE’S SOME THING CALLED SARCASM IN THIS WORLD, YOU KNOW?!
I angrily excused myself from the table and heatedly whispered in Al’s ear, “I hope you have a nice time at Hogsmeade. Wouldn’t want you falling ill or perhaps even dying before that special day, huh?” Then, I stalked off with my head high and my nose in the air, not even caring that practically everybody was staring at me.
I walked out with pride, and prideful and haughty and confident I was!
Well, at least until I tripped on my own feet and landed into the punch, spilling it all over the tables and causing panic everywhere.
Merlin, Mondays must really hate me.
A/N: Hi guys! ^^ So, what do you think? I would really enjoy hearing your opinions (whether it's criticism, comments, whatever) as it really keeps my spirits up and helps my writing. :) Any opinions on Nikki? Or Albus? Rose? Teddy? Personally, I really love Nikki. Don't you? She is the magical version of me. Face planting? Check. Completely stripped of coordination? Check. Sarcasm? CHECK CHECK CHECK CHECK.
Haha, so I hope you guys enjoy this chappie and read on! ;)
Much love, xxSamxx
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