Flashback and the Wizarding Club
3) Flashback and the Wizarding Club
Fucking hell, man. What was that? You knew you haven’t had some action lately so your hormones are raging about like elephants who’ve seen a mouse.
Do you like my similes? Thought so.
I shouldn’t have even brought her here- should’ve just brang James. Could have found some nice girl myself, who I would not have to think about shagging twice. But no, I have to be a gentleman and ask Salter to come as well.
Salter. The hazel-eyed, one woman freakshow. Do you know hazel eyes are so weird? Well, at least Salter’s are. There light brown, and have these green specks that stand out. You’d think they wouldn’t work, but they work perfectly. They had little grey bits in the as well, and you can tell when she’s excited before a prank let’s say cause the green specks in her eyes will come out more vigorously. When she’s upset they’ll dull down, and the grey bits will stand out, so it’s much nicer when she’s happy.
No I don’t stalk her or examine her with unusual interest. I just found them interesting. I was just following in the footsteps of a researcher.
You’ll see my name in lights one day.
Fred Weasley II: The Most Famous Hazel-Eye Researcher in the Wizarding World.
But, back on topic, what the hell did I just do there?
I basically felt up Salter and grinded with her.
I felt her up.
And damn, I’d be lying if I said it didn’t feel good.
I would never admit it to anyone, but she is absolutely fucking amazing body wise. And in snogging and shagging abilities. To be fair, I have only snogged and shagged her once, while we were both drunk, but I don’t regret it. She has the most perfect curves I’ve ever seen, has the softest skin in the world, never paints her self with make up and still has the longest eyelashes I have ever seen. Plus, she’s incredibly flexible and can get leg right up to her head, and do the splits everyway. If you’ve had enough experience, you’ll know why that’s an advantage in bed. She was my first. But, no one can know that- everyone else thinks my first was in sixth year with this girl who I gone out with for a month. I can’t remember her name, but James is the only one who knows that isn’t true. He thought my first was near the end of seventh year with Lotus Vane. I only remember her name because she stalked me for two months asking me to shag her, before I gave in. I didn’t want her following me around after school- she was becoming a reporter for the Daily Prophet and I didn’t want anymore publicity than necessary.
You’d be surprised how many people want to know about the life of the son of George Weasley, owner of the most popular business’ in the Wizarding World.
Anyways, I can’t spend an hour doing an internal monologue- nobody takes this long in the toilet apart from my sister in the morning.
I miss her. She would be so disappointed in me right now.
I was so desperate for a snog I was thinking about getting it on with my sisters ex-best friend, my best friend’s almost sister and my worst enemy. This is probably the most ashamed I’ve ever been in my life.
Why am I getting so upset? I’ve done this plenty a time with other girls like Jessie.
But, of course this is Salter. She’s not like everyone else; not just a girl I can fuck around with. Not a girl who’d let me or I’d want to fuck around with.
I need to go and get a girl. As ugly as it sounds, I need someone who I can just shag for the night, hopefully someone understanding.
The first step to this is getting drunk at a high end club. Wizard preferably- I much prefer just the ladies just performing the contraceptive charm than using one of those Muggle condoms. Oh, this brings a flashback…
3rd year, 1st October
“Alright, 3rd years, settle down,” declared McGonagall from the high table, and the chatter immediately ceased. All third years had been told to stay after the end of lunch and did not need any of their books for fourth period. I had not a clue of what it was about, but if we get to miss Divination, as much as it’s fun, it’s all good. “Please follow your Head of Houses. Hufflepuff, you will be with Professor Willoughby in the Ancient Runes classroom. Ravenclaw, you will be with Professor Patil in the Charms No. 2 classroom. Slytherin, you will be with Professor Zabini in the Potions No. 4 classroom. Gryffindor, you will be with Professor Longbottom in Greenhouse No. 2.”
“What do you think’s going on?” muttered James, as we walked through the crowd towards the Greenhouse.
“The whole of third year… Something to do with our age because we haven’t heard the other years being called out…” I thought out aloud. After a few seconds Salter’s face paled.
“What’s wrong?” asked James, looking worriedly at the wide eyed Salter.
“We’re… having… s-s-sex education,” she stuttered. I choked on my own spit. James’ face paled as well.
“Now, no need to jump to conclusions there,” I muttered shakily, and James stayed silent.
We entered the greenhouse, all a bit worried. Sex education with Professor Longbottom didn’t sounds just plain awkward. Poor guy. We can’t even make this funny, because we’ll feel bad for him. It sucks to have a nice head of house.
“Okay, so I’m just going to go for a minute and talk to the Headmistress… Talk amongst yourself- sex education up next,” laughed Professor Longbottom nervously, shooting out the room, confirming their suspicions on what this was all about. The room flared up in chatter and moans so I zoned out.
I began imagining Hufflepuff’s sex education. I bet Miss. Willoughby had brang puppets and was doing some sort of show with them. And, those little ‘puffs had no clue about sex life and were just shouting out things like ‘I like puppets!’ Haha. That made me laugh.
What about Ravenclaws? It was probably just images plastered onto the wall and Professor Patil going on about the science of the whole thing using a big stick.
Hey, cut me some slack. I’m a 13 year old guy.
Oh, and those Slytherins. I could imagine Professor Zabini just putting on porn for them, and leaving the room. Zabini was an unusual type of Professor, but not too bad for a Slytherin and Potions master, as long as you were on his good side. He was pretty much neutral in the war, making him perfect for Head of Slytherin.
“Fred?” asked James, amused, snapping me out of my reverie. “Why did you just shout out porn to the class?” Salter was full on laughing, so I shot her a glare to shut her up. The whole class was looking at me oddly, some slightly scared.
“I was thinking about Slytherin’s sex education,” I explained, and there was a chorus of ‘Oh’ before everyone went back to their conversations. I grinned- I love Gryffindors.
“Gryffindors,” came a voice I didn’t expect to hear. Professor McGonagall? “Since Professor Longbottom insisted he had some important work to do,” she began, I could’ve sworn she rolled her eyes, but then again this is uptight, prim Professor McGonagall, “I will be taking the sex education class this afternoon.” I couldn’t restrain myself- I burst out laughing. James did the same, but I think Salter managed to stop it from coming out by biting her lip. “I would like you to particularly listen, Mr. Weasley, after I caught you in a cupboard with another 3rd year.”
Okay, that makes it sound worse than it actually was. “It was just a bit of kissing, Professor. Haven’t you done a bit with a Mr. lately?” I asked, cheekily. I swear her lips thinned further, if that was even possible.
“Detention Mr. Weasley,” she declared. I shrugged- they were never too bad, ol’ Minnie’s detentions.
By nearly the end of the lesson, all three of us achieved detention for a week for asking certain questions. She decided that by extending even further, it wasn’t going to deter us in the slightest. She knew us well. We couldn’t pass by this once in a life time opportunity?
“Professor, why would someone want to have sex, if not for a baby? I don’t understand.”
“For pleasure, Miss. Salter.”
“How is it pleasurable? Could you describe the experience?”
“Professor, I thought babies came from the Giant Hippogriff?”
“Mr. Potter, I can assure you did not come from the Great Hippogriff.”
“YOU LIE! THE GREAT HIPPOGRIFF IS MY FATHER I TELL-“
“Professor, why do my parents make funny noises at night time in their room?”
“Mr. Weasley, sometimes while in the process of having sex your parents may make these noises- Mr. Weasley, you perfectly well know, and you are simply doing this to attract attention. This immaturity is intolerable. Detention.”
“Well, you must not be getting any action lately considering your so stiff-“
“I heard that. Double detention, edging on a third. Mouth shut, Mr. Weasley.”
“Professor, I think I’ve got a weird rash in this area-“
“Mr. Potter, pull your trousers up and see Madame Pomfrey about it.”
Now, we had finally reached the last activity of the abnormal yet hilarious lesson. And, this just topped everything off.
“Now, you are aware of what goes on in the process, I would like the female students to cast a contraceptive charm on themselves, and the male students to learn how to put on a Muggle condom- both equally beneficial contraceptive devices, which can fail you if not done properly.”
I immediately began taking off my robes, and taking off my belt much to the amusement of most of the class.
“Mr. Weasley,” snapped McGonagall, and I smirked cheekily at her, before putting on the most innocent look that was possible.
“Unless you would like to undress yourself, I suggest looking in front of you where cucumbers are placed and are being held up in the correct manner using some charms.”
James’ eyes widened and sparkled with mirth.
“So, Professor, we’ll be putting… condoms… on… cucumbers?” confirmed James. She gave a stiff nod, and the whole boys side of the class began laughing hysterically. The girls side simply shook their head, but I noticed some of them were biting their lip to stop them from laughing.
“Honestly, be a bit more mature,” sniffed Annie McLaggen, one of the prettiest girls in our year, flicking her brunette, perfectly straight hair behind her shoulder. Honest to Merlin, I think some of us drooled.
“I would only do that for you,” I replied in a deep voice, hoping it didn’t squeak in the middle- that would just ruin the effect. Luckily, it didn’t and I winked at her. She winked back.
“Oh, I know,” she smirked.
“Sheesh, you spend 3 years trying to get him to be more mature and one flick of her hair, and he’s all for it. Wanker,” muttered Salter, and I grinned at her. She winked back to let me know it was a joke.
“Language, Miss. Salter! 10 points from Gryffindor- if I here anything more, one more detention on top of the many you have already received! And, I have had enough of this conversation. First, girls?” grumbled McGonagall. Damn you Salter. That 10 points could’ve been taken away for something at least worthwhile. Like me calling you a wanker.
They all took off their robes and lifted their tops somewhat hesitantly, once noticing the boys all looking on with interest. Cut us some slack- hormones have just come to us.
Most cast the spell, and achieved the green glow on the belly button that signified it had been cast. The only ones left who hadn’t done that were Annie (who was just attempting to leave her flat stomach on display a tad longer), Inga (an incredibly dumb girl that was not too bad looks wise but had the personality of a troll) and Salter. Salter was the most amusing.
She had one hand holding her shirt, only revealing as much as was necessary, and one hand holding her wand that’s other end was viciously poking her belly button.
“Why won’t you glow?” she wailed.
“Here’s an idea, what if you’re not a woman?” I suggested, she wacked me upside the head with her wand, singing a section of my hair a little bit. “A bit of PMS here…”
“Come with me and I’ll show you I’m a woman.” My eyes widened.
“You would never!”
“Oh, I would.”
“You would do that?”
“You thinking what I’m thinking of?”
“MAKE A SANDWICH,” we shouted in unison, and laughed manically, as everyone around us gave us looks that said ‘Really? That’s how she’s prove it?’ James laughed with us, usually taking part in our antics. Guess he’s already got more detentions than both of us, and a scarier mum. Though my mummy can be dead scary when she wants to. She’s more cool about detentions than Aunt Ginny though, considering she married the Detention King of that generation, George Weasley- my daddy. Yes, I call them mummy and daddy. Problem?
“That’s it! Another detention for you both. Now hush, and get onto your cucumber, Mr. Weasley.” Then we burst out laughing again. Oh dear.
Oh dear. Good times. Wait, what time is it? I looked down at my watch.
I’ve got an hour before the clubs are at their peak to sort myself out and find the best one. Also, I need to make sure my bed is useable- right now clutters all over it, and when I’m drunk and with a girl you can’t expect me to clean up.
I apparated back to the apartment- James would be cool, and Salter doesn’t give two shits about me anyways.
After chucking some stuff off the double bed, which was notoriously comfy (brought it from home- I’ve had it since I was 17). With some charms and extra enhancements, it never died. I had texted James to tell him where I was and was currently in the bathroom, making sure I looked absolutely shagable.
I ruffled my hair in front of the mirror and winked at myself in the mirror.
Well, hello sexy. Wanna visit my bed anytime soon? It’s too bad you already stay there
Wouldn’t life be easier if you could fuck yourself? I mean, I’m so good looking, it hurts. I mean, I’m definitely not gay, but I know when I look fine. Not just normal fine, but the fine where you extend the ‘i’ and it suddenly has a whole new meaning. That fine.
I smirked at myself in the mirror once more, before apparating off to Diagon Alley. It was incredible, when I discovered this many years back, the summer we finished Hogwarts from Teddy. He showed James and I, against Victoire’s wishes. Apparantly, it was too filled with ‘randy, revealing women dancing on stage, overcrowded dance floors and booths with curtains for shagging couples if you couldn’t get home’. This of course just enhanced our interest.
If you walked down to the end of Diagon Alley, just before Knockturn Alley, there was a little closed down bookshop. If you pressed the right code you could get in. You’d walk to the end and put your hand on a MagiScanner- similar to a Muggle fingerprint scanner but better, more efficient and magical. This confirmed you were 18 and were a member. It wasn’t free and you gave an annual charge, but it wasn’t much, and just to know you’re not a hobo off the streets. Most people could afford the little payment. You then entered full on heaven. It was a streets lined with different clubs all blasting music, yet you couldn’t hear anything in the next building as it was all stopped using ‘Silencio’.
I walked inside my favourite club, “Magic.” It was not filled with raving sluts, rather with people who enjoy to party and maybe got around a little bit. Then again, I can’t be hypocrite- I get around quite the bit myself.
I opened the door and embraced the music.
Soon, enough I was dead drunk, snogging a girl who was damn hot and we were making our way back to the apartment. We got on the night bus once we got out of Diagon Alley, to near my place. We didn’t talk to be honest- just snogged on the almost empty bus.
We reached the Apartment and I fumbled with the keys, while my lips were still attached to hers. I finally twisted the key and heard the gratifying click of the door unlocking and we stumbled inside and to the room.
I charmed the door red, an indication James and I used to show that the other should not enter the room at that time, lest be betrothed with heavily awkward situations and then cast a ‘Silencio’ charm after I had complaints from James and I had complaints with him while one was shagging, and the other was attempting to sleep. I had cast it so many times while piss drunk it wasn’t difficult now.
Finally, what I’ve been missing for a while now.
Don’t look at me like that- I’m a guy who’s nearly 20 years old and has been missing out on action, big time.
Review if you want, I love reading them!:’)
A/N: A bit of a shorter chapter. Previously I was going add this on to the end of the last chapter, but thought it would get too long and boring.
Next chapter from James’ POV! Been missing our little second James, ey?