Chapter 3 : He will never know.
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“Have you decided when you’re going to tell James yet?” Rose asked as we walked to Charms.
Why can’t it leave me alone?
“You can’t avoid it forever, Katy, no matter how much you want to bury it. He deserves to know.” She looks at me sympathetically.
I’m not avoiding it, I’m just...putting it to the back of my mind. There is a difference. Why can’t she understand that? I’m trying to keep my mind occupied on my education and that’s is so much more important than speaking to James.
“I’ll tell him when I’m ready.” I say quite impatiently.
“It’s better to tell him sooner rather than later.” She replies in that, ‘I know everything’ voice, which she has acquired.
“Yes and that’ll come when I’m ready, Rose, so please can you just drop it already?” I hiss as we pass a group of third years, who have decided to accumulate in the middle of the corridor.
Prft move it Third Years. It’s not like you own this bloody corridor.
“I won’t drop it until you tell him. He is my cousin after all.” Rose sighs.
“Cousin or not, it isn’t up to you.” I fire back.
“Touchy with the hormones, Katy.” She grins. “Just remember what I said, otherwise you’ll find yourself in more shit than you already are in.”
“I really couldn’t care less, now drop it.”
“No, but you really ne-“
“Drop it, Rose.”
“Listen to m-“
“I said drop it!”
“Fine! I’m dropping it. The subject is now officially dropped.” Rose announces as we reach Charms.
“Finally, you’re here! I’ve been waiting for you both, where have you been?” Dom asks as she leans on the wall.
“Talking.” Rose shrugs.
“Ah I see. So have you decided when you’re going to tell him?” Dom lowers her voice.
Oh, the question is back again.
Why can’t they call it quits?
What did I do to deserve all of this questioning?
Haha, you got yourself pregnant, that’s what you did.
Oh shut up. It’ not like I did it on purpose.
Snappy. Grumpy. Yes, they are all the signs of your hormones changing. Just remember, you brought this on yourself.
So now I’m talking to myself? How cliché.
“No, I haven’t. I wish you’d both stop with that bloody question, just leave me to sort it out.” I cry in frustration and walk into Charms in a huff.
It seems I always walk off in a huff when they ask me that question. But why can’t they let me wallow in my self pity? Just as I adjust to the news of my life officially ending, they bring all the unwanted questions back into my mind. They have asked me that question about twenty times in the past couple days and I swear to Merlin’s underwear that I will slap the next person who asks me.
I’ll just blame the hormones for my unnatural behaviour.
After all, I can’t help having a baby in my stomach.
I can’t help the imbalance of the hormones.
And I can’t help getting annoyed at everybody (Well, Rose, Dom and Lily seeing as they are the only three who know) fussing over me because I’m pregnant.
It isn’t that much of a big deal anyway because let’s be honest here, I was never going to pass my NEWTs. I only just scraped decent grades in OWLs, so I’ll just have to hope and pray that I win the muggle thing that they call the ‘Lottery’.
If I don’t win the Lottery, then I’ll just have to bring my kid up in a small one bed flat with mould growing up the corner of the walls. We’d have to look in bins for food because I will have no money as I’m pretty sure my family won’t want anything to do with me after they hear that I’m pregnant and I’m positive that James will hate me for the rest of my life because I ruined his life. Then because I ruined his life, his family would hate the baby and me.
So that is one of the reasons as to why I cannot tell James yet. He just can’t know about this because he’ll just freak out. I mean, it’s not everyday you get told you’re going to be a father. My future is already ruined, his isn’t.
So by not telling him, I’m doing him a massive favour. So Rose, Dom and Lily should really be thanking me, instead of giving me so much grief for not telling him because I’m saving their cousin from a life long responsibility.
If only they saw it that way.
Because right now, the only way they seem to see it is if I don’t tell James, I’ll most probably be appearing on ‘The Witch Weekly Show’ or ‘Judge the Juvenile’ in five years time.
Saying that, even if I do tell him, I’ll probably be on one of those shows anyway.
I can see it now, ‘ TEENAGE MOTHER AT WAR WITH HER BABY’S FATHER AND HIS FAMILY. ‘
Or if James agrees that I’m a slut, it’ll be ‘THE ULTIMATE BETRAYAL. I NEED THE DNA RESULTS TO PROVE THAT THE BABY IS MINE.’
That would be entertainment, wouldn’t it? Grab the popcorn.
“You haven’t paid any attention to the lesson, have you?” Rose says in a bored tone.
“Nope, too busy thinking about when I’ll tell James.” I say sarcastically.
“You’re going to tell him?” She replies, brightly.
Obviously Rose hasn’t grasped the concept of sarcasm yet.
“Too good to be true.” She shrugs, rolling her eyes.
Oh Rose, you know me too well.
I still haven’t spoken to James.
I shouldn’t have to be the one speak to him though.
No matter what Lily, Rose and Dom say, I’m not the one who should make the effort.
He got me into this mess, so he should get me out of it.
Even though he doesn’t know anything about the mess I’m currently in, he could have at least talked to me.
We are best friends after all.
Really, it should be him who makes the effort to come and speak to me even if I don’t want to speak to him.
Rose has even spoken to him about how I am so ‘embarrassed’ by the whole ‘friends with benefits’ situation- thankfully leaving out the tiny detail of me being pregnant with his child.
After being told that, any normal person would come and find me to sort through everything and it could all be amazingly perfect and we could all live happily ever after.
But James is not a normal person and he hasn’t come and found me.
Yes, I have been avoiding him like he’s some plague but my point still stands.
He should have come to find me.
I may not want to talk to him, but I do want him to talk to me.
Call me immature, but that’s the way it goes.
Now everything isn’t amazingly perfect, in fact its amazingly messed up.
And having to sit through an hour of Professor Binns talking about the Chamber of Secrets, in which Harry Potter was able to open, really isn’t making anything better.
To my left, I have Rose scribbling every possible piece of information on her parchment so fast, that I’m actually quite frightened to dip my quill into our shared inkwell, in fear of her cutting one of my fingers with her sharp quill.
To my right, I have Dom smiling to herself as she draws rude pictures on the desk, obviously not interested in the lesson either. Not that I can blame her though, seeing as I find myself doing exactly the same thing.
And from behind, I have Al and Scorpius amusing themselves by chucking scrunched up pieces of parchment at my head.
Apparently, my neck is worth 5 points, my ears are worth 5 points and the centre of my head is worth 10 points.
Woop de doo.
“Psst, Katy!” Al whispers from behind.
“Psst Al!” I imitate.
“Do you mind us chucking pieces of parchment at your head?”
“Do I have a choice?” I hiss.
“Glad you don’t mind!”
“Miss Owen, would you kindly repeat what I have just said?” Professor Binns floats slowly towards me, while the whole class turn to look in my direction. I find myself momentarily distracted at the fact that I'm being taught by a ghost. It's actually quite weird.
I cough. “Well, you’ve just been talking about Harry Potter opening the Chamber of Secrets.”
The class laughed.
Oh yes because it’s so bloody funny, isn’t it?
“That was the topic of discussion twenty minutes ago! Perhaps if you took more interest in your education rather than Mr. Potter and Mr. Malfoy, then maybe you would actually pass History Of Magic this year. Five points from Gryffindor.” He droned before floating back to his desk.
I have come to the conclusion that both Potter boys are utter pricks.
And so is that ghost.
Fifteen minutes later, History of Magic has finished and now I find myself walking down the Second Floor corridor towards the Library with Rose and Dom.
Being friends with a studious maniac, Dom and I are often dragged to the library to complete our homework and to just generally chill.
What a life I lead, spending my free time chilling in a library.
Fun, fun, fun.
“I can’t believe that Binns basically said that I fail History of Magic. That is one of my best subjects and it was all Al’s fault.” I moan to them both.
“Bless you, sweetie.” Dom says and flicks her hand in a carefree manner. “You only lost us five points for it.”
“That isn’t the point Dom, Al should have lost us five points for distracting me.”
“Well to prove Binns wrong, you could try and put a bit of effort into this next essay? It won’t hurt to try and maybe it might take your mind off a few things, you know?” Rose smiles.
Is she trying to say that I don’t put effort into my schoolwork?
And is she trying to say that schoolwork will take my mind off pregnancy?
Believe me, Rose. An apocalypse couldn’t even take my mind off the baby chilling in my womb.
“What are you trying to say, Rose?” I flare, but before she could even answer I heard somebody laugh as we turned round a corner.
Please Merlin, I’ll do anything.
Don’t let that laugh belong to James.
Don’t let this happen to me.
What did I ever do in my past life to deserve all this karma being blown my way?
We come to an abrupt halt in front of Fred and the one person who I desperately didn’t want to see.
Okay, so I wanted him to talk to me, but I didn’t want him to talk to me today.
So that is the reason why I’m now fleeing in the opposite direction. I’m ignoring the manly calls of ‘Katy!’ ‘Katy, stop!’ as I keep on running.
Merlin, since when was this corridor so bloody long?
At this rate, I’ll pass out with exhaustion.
Why oh why, did I have to be so unfit?
My legs lock together and I fall flat on my face.
Smooth, Katy. Real smooth.
Behind me I could hear James finally catching up, so I didn’t bother getting up, I just stayed on the floor with my head buried in my arms.
“Katy! Are you alright? Look, why the hell didn’t you stop running? I wouldn’t have hexed if you stopped running.” He says breathlessly.
I should probably answer him.
He mutters the counter curse and my legs separate, allowing me to move my legs.
Ergh. “What, James?” I say, lifting my head up to look at him.
“Erm, are you alright?” He says warily, obviously aware of my bluntness.
“Does it look like I’m alright, James?” I hiss. “You hexed me, causing me to fall flat on my face! Would you be alright if I did that to you?!”
Oops, pregnancy hormones have woken up.
“Probably not. Look, I’m sorry, I just need to talk to you and I couldn’t do that with you running away.”
“I wasn’t running away.” I mutter, getting up and dusting myself off.
“So what were you doing?” He cocks his eyebrow and smirks.
Oh piss off, Potter.
“I was...er, I was checking on my...owl.”
Great excuse, Katy. Great excuse.
“Er, right, okay then. For a moment, it seemed like you were trying to avoid me.” He says, leaning against the wall.
I laugh nervously. “Of course not! Why would I do that?”
“Because you’ve been avoiding me for the past ten days.”
“No, I don’t think I have? You see, I’ve been very very busy lately.” I nod in a convincing way.
“So is that why you skipped a few classes, disappeared for a few days and when you finally came out of hiding, you screamed at Al when he came up and asked you if you were okay?” He raises his eyebrow.
“How do you know that I missed a few classes?” I narrow my eyes.
“I think you forget that I have a brother in all your classes?”
Oh yes, I knew that.
“Well I wasn’t well because I suffered from really bad...”
Oh Merlin, what do I say? I suffered from, headaches? Stomach cramps?
“Really bad what?” He asks.
“Really bad...period pains.”
Shit, did I really say that? Way to make matters worse, Katy. You complete idiot.
“Oh, right. Well I really wouldn’t know anything about those.” He flushes.
“No, I don’t think you would.”
Great, now he’s going to think that I have a near death experience one week every month.
Oh James, little do you know that I won’t be suffering for the next 7 months.
“Rose said you were embarrassed...” He drifts off.
“Of course not, well, yeah I was, but now I’m fine with it, as it really doesn’t matter.” I ramble.
Well this is rather awkward.
“Okay good because you know, it was only an experiment and I can’t really continue with the whole benefit thing now because I’ve got a girlfriend.” He shrugs.
It was only an experiment? We made a baby and now you’re telling me it was only a freaking EXPERIMENT?
“Well I didn’t really want to continue with it any-wait, you have a girlfriend?” My eyes widen out of shock.
He can’t have a girlfriend. He’s the father of our baby for Merlin’s sake! He just can’t have a girlfriend because he’s supposed to support me, not some blonde bimbo!
“Er, yes I do. We’ve been dating for a few days now and you know Katy, I really like her. I think you’ll like her too.” He grins.
Not bloody likely. I can assure you, James Potter, I will not like your blonde bimbo even if she was the best thing that ever happened to you.
“Right, well, that’s good.” I laugh nervously and then...
I was sick.
I was sick all over James Potter’s shoes.
Merlin, don’t tell me this is the start of bloody morning sickness.
A/N: Hey, sorry for the wait again. Guess what? I've had more essays and coursework to write up, but I've managed to post this chapter for you all! :) I did make up 'Judge the Juvenile' and 'The Witch Weekly Show', but if there is a chat show programme out there with those names then credit can go to them! Okay, so on 11th April I visited Leavesden Studio's in London-The Making Of Harry Potter Studio Tour. IT IS AMAZING. Seeing as this site has so many harry potter fans (including me) I thought I'd tell you. It's just amazing and I'd definitely recommend it! Has anybody else been?
PS: A little review in the grey box below will be happily welcomed! :D
Disclaimer: All rights to JKR because her magical world is absolutely amazing.