Thanks to ClearPlastic at TDA for the chapter image!
Witch Against the World
“Lily! Get your lazy butt out of bed; you’re going to be late!” I awoke to the sounds of my mother’s yells. She’s so polite that woman.
I settled back into my dreamland and was just falling asleep again when, “LILY!” Dammit.
“I’M COMING!” I shouted back, as I heaved myself out of bed and dressed in a lethargic state. Normally I would have set my alarm but I was too excited last night and forgot. After making a quick trip to the bathroom, I took the stairs two at a time –almost died- and skipped into the kitchen.
“Do I smell bacon?” My dad asked eagerly, coming in behind me. My mom was at the stove with a frying pan in one hand and a piece of paper in the other.
“Yes you do, if you want some grab a plate,” she replied, her eyes flicking over to the paper every few seconds. I looked curiously at whatever it was.
“What you got there mom?” I asked, getting a plate from the cupboard and sitting at the island with my dad. She waved dismissively and put the letter in her pocket.
“Oh nothing; just Petunia wishing you… well and a good year. She had to shoot off early this morning; you know wedding plans and all.” I rolled my eyes and buttered some toast. I know exactly what Petunia wished of me and it certainly wasn’t my wellbeing. When we were younger, Petunia and I were the best of friends but when I was accepted into Hogwarts she didn’t think it was as cool as my parents did. I always thought she was jealous but she told me she didn’t care and labelled me as a freak. That has been my name ever since.
We have such a lovely relationship; we’re always competing against each other for my parents’ attention. When I came home and proudly informed my parents that I’d gotten twelve OWL’s in my exams; Petunia pushed past me and told them she was engaged to Vernon Dursley, a whale of a man who was obsessed with the drill company he was working part time for, Grunnings.
Petunia’s been engaged almost a year now and is constantly busy with wedding plans. It’s scheduled for some time in April next year and I plan to stay as far away as possible.
The kitchen was silent, so to break it I poked the newspaper my dad was shielded behind.
“Yes Lily?” he asked in amusement, his head covered in thick, red hair appeared over the top. I shrugged and smiled.
“Breakfast’s served.” My mom said, bringing the pan over and lowering bacon onto our plates. “Hurry up and eat Lil, you don’t want to be late for your last year of school.”
It hit me like a dull blow to the stomach. This was the last time I was going to Kings Cross Station. It was the last time I was going to board the Hogwarts Express. I was going to have to be a grown up, and live by myself, and feed myself and work-
I froze, mid-bacon.
“Lily you okay?” My dad asked in concern
I frowned. “Yeah, I just realized that this is the last time that I’ll be getting on the Hogwarts Express on the 1st September,” I replied in a sombre tone. My dad patted me on the back consolingly.
“It’s okay Lil; it just means that soon you’ll be moving onto bigger things.” I chewed on my lip.
“I don’t know if I’m ready to move on though.”
“You will be,” Mom said. “You don’t have to be just now but when the time comes, you’ll be ready enough.”
“I hope so,” I replied.
“It’s all worth it in the end,” she said, staring at my dad lovingly. Ah I see; they are having a ‘moment’.
“Hey guys, wanna a bit of burger with that cheese?” I asked grinning at my joke. I couldn’t help it. I just felt compelled to ruin the moment with my humour.
“Very funny, now go get finished up.” Mom ordered, smiling a little. I quickly shovelled in the bacon and slice of toast and skipped upstairs. I levitated my trunk, feeling the power flowing through my fingertips to my wand like electricity. It felt amazing to be able to do magic outside of school. Being seventeen definitely had some benefits.
“LILY YOU’RE LATE! YOU’LL HAVE TO APPARATE!” Mom yelled from downstairs. I looked at my alarm clock and swore very loudly. The clock read five to eleven. I grabbed Frank’s cage with him in it and put him next to my trunk. Setting my trunk down with a thump but still holding on to it; I yelled goodbye then turned around three times on the spot and focused intently on Kings Cross Station. It felt like I was being squeezed through a tight tube and I seemed to hold my breath for a second.
“OW!” I yelled as I was thrown into a group of bins. I tried to get to my feet when I was taken out by my heavy trunk, which for some reason had decided to follow me instead of staying by my side. “DAMMIT THAT HURT!”
“I thought I heard your sweet, melodious voice.” The smooth, suave voice of James Potter came from above. Where in the name of Merlin’s thong did he come from? I reckon I’m embedded with a tracking device… “Need a hand?” He extended an arm but just then my owl dropped from the air and a very surprised James managed to nimbly catch the cage just before it whacked him in the head.
Frank flapped around in an irritated manner and James put him on the floor, before lifting my trunk off my chest with ease. I couldn’t help but stare a little at his bulging biceps as he freed me from my trunk. Boy he looks strong.
“I’m pretty sure three of my ribs just punctured my lung.” I wheezed, hauling myself up, his biceps forgotten.
“I’m pretty sure you shouldn’t be allowed to apparate,” he replied with a smirk. I blushed furiously and snatched my trunk back.
“I couldn’t picture the place. It’s not my fault I have the attention span of a two year old.” I snapped back, towing my trunk towards the barrier.
“According to you that’s also my mental age,” he grinned, keeping up with me easily. We passed through the barrier and onto Platform 9¾.
I looked around in awe, taking in the excited kids, the jealous younger siblings, the sad parents and last but not least, the scarlet engine. The Hogwarts Express. Even though I had been taking the same route to Hogwarts for seven years, it still amazed me. Sometimes it was hard to believe my life was real, that I was actually a witch.
“Here let me take that.” James tried to take my trunk.
“I’m fine thank you! I can carry my own goddamn trunk!” I retorted, still sore from my near-death experience. Unfortunately I tried to grab the trunk back and it knocked into my legs and I fell over.
I growled in frustration.
“Did you just growl?” James asked in amusement.
I sat with my arms folded and my legs crossed in the middle of the platform.
I sniffed, “maybe.”
“It’s not very becoming.”
“Your face isn’t very becoming.” I replied childishly.
“Now that’s not very mature is it?”
“Your mom’s not very mature.”
“Wow, it’s not just your attention span that’s childish.” James commented lightly. He then picked me up and threw me over his shoulder in a fireman’s lift. I let out an indignant squeak. Must we do this every year? It’s getting old and a lot more painful due to my assumed broken ribs.
I’m very dramatic; I find it adds a little extra spice to life.
“JAMES CHARLUS POTTER YOU PUT ME DOWN RIGHT NOW!” I screamed, thumping his back. He charmed my trunk and still angry owl, to follow us and smiled in what could only be pure amusement.
“How do you know my middle name is Charlus?” James asked.
“Oh because I went into your dorm and- THAT’S BESIDE THE POINT! LET ME DOWN!” I blushed again and resumed my screaming. The whole dorm thing was a dare. A badly thought out dare, that ended with Abi hanging out of the window and Jess trying to pull her back. Never again.
I decided that if I remained good and quiet, then he may let me go.
But I’m a very impatient person. “You let me down right now!” I demanded mere seconds later. James shook his head.
“Nope,” he replied boarding the train, and beginning to stride down the corridor looking for his friends no doubt. Suddenly I spotted a blonde wavy head somewhere near the end of the hallway.
“HELP! HELP ME I’M BEING KIDNAPPED! HEEELP!!!” I screamed as loudly as possible. James almost dropped me in surprise. Do you think he’d be as irritating if he was deaf?
Anyway, target acquired. Jess turned around sharply, wand drawn and made eye contact with me. I nodded slightly and she grinned. James kidnaps me every year and every year it takes me the majority of the train ride to escape. It’s an incredible inconvenience. This time planning was handed over to Jess and she is an evil genius.
“Ninja’s assemble!” Jess shouted and suddenly we were surrounded by my friends.
Abi grinned devilishly and her light hazel eyes glinted. She emerged from a compartment next to us, wand aloft. Nicola strode down the corridor towards us, smirking. Molly was currently standing behind James, grinning. And finally you have you have the evil genius, Jess. She came at us from the opposite direction, beaming triumphantly. James looked around wildly, realizing we were trapped.
“I’ll blast my way out!” he threatened, shoving the hand that wasn’t holding me, in his pocket.
“Looking for this?” Molly asked, twirling his wand in her fingers and grinning like a maniac.
“You little- how did you get that?” James asked incredulously. Jess smirked.
“Little thing called magic hon, you should try it.”
“Damn,” he muttered. Everyone seemed to have stuck their heads out of their compartment doors to watch the show. That’s right, flock to the freaks. “Well I shan’t give up without a fight! I shan’t surrender the beautiful Lily Evans to you demonic hags!” I rolled my eyes.
“Every year…” I muttered. “Every damn year…” I was paid no attention to.
“Did you just call my girlfriend a demonic hag?” An amused Remus asked from the door of a compartment near us.
“Uh no- well maybe, but uh, she-” James spluttered.
I sighed impatiently.
“Is anyone going to get me off this toe-rag’s shoulder already? It’s really very uncomfortable and I’m pretty sure I have a few broken ribs!” I yelled. They all looked up at me.
“Oh yeah, sorry Lils forgot you were up there.” Niki replied sheepishly.
“I didn’t!” I remarked as James carefully put me down. I rubbed my stomach and chest. “Ow, your shoulders hurt you know.” I informed him.
“Sorry Lily Flower.”
“Remmy!” Jess shouted, flinging herself at Remus and wrapping her arms round his neck. He put his face in her hair and smiled. Aw cute.
Suddenly someone covered my eyes. I felt momentary panic, until I recognized the aftershave. Minty…
“Hayden!” I said smiling and turning around. My tall, gingery friend stood before me. He enveloped me in a big hug. “Dude it’s been too long.” He nodded, grinning. Hayden Spinner and I have been friends ever since second year. He’s in Hufflepuff so we don’t get to see each other a lot.
“I know Red, it’s been ages.” I saw James out of the corner of my eye, suddenly looking very interested in his nails.
“Are we gonna find a compartment or do I have to stand here and watch Jess and Remus sucking face, Lily and Hayden flirting and James looking like he’s gonna throw a rock at someone’s face?” Abi asked bluntly, hands on hips. I gaped.
“We are not flirting! We’ve barely said two words to each other!” I exclaimed.
“It’s the looks that do it,” Sirius replied, coming out of the same compartment Remus had. Peter followed.
I scowled at Sirius and he stuck his tongue out at me.
“Hey James do you want to borrow my rock? His name is Andre,” Molly asked, offering a rather large looking stone to James.
“I’m sure he doesn’t want that.” I said quickly, pushing Molly’s arm back. “Hayden you want to sit with us?” I asked, blushing slightly under Abi’s watchful gaze. What is with all the blushing? I feel like a hormonal thirteen year old.
“Sure thing Red,” he replied. We walked into the compartment and the Marauders followed.
“Where do you think you guys are going?” I asked, turning to face them.
“-Well that’s my girlfriend.” Remus pointed to Jess. “And also it was our compartment first.” I raised an eyebrow at Remus and he put his hands up quickly in defence. “But you can have it!”
“-That’s my secret lover.” Sirius pointed to Peter by accident and we all turned to look at him. “I meant Molly,” he amended hastily. Molly just looked disinterested and was stroking her rock.
“-She’s going to one day bear my children.” Peter joked, gesturing to Abi. I swear she turned a slight greenish colour at the thought of bearing Peter Pettigrew’s children. Poor dear, he’s delusional.
My accusing gaze turned to James.
“Your excuse?” I asked, putting my hands on my hips. He floundered for a minute, and then smiled confidently.
“I have a new game we can play!” he answered joyously, seeming to skip into the empty compartment.
“I’m thinking we slip some laxatives into his drink and see what happens?” Jess asked, grinning at the thought of James Potter being stuck to the toilet for a few hours. Remus put his arm round her and smiled fondly. I will never understand their relationship. Bitch be crazy.
We were just about to enter the compartment but I stopped and looked at Abi.
"Are you sure they have to come?" I whined, jerking my thumb back at the smirking Marauders. Abi put her hands on her hips.
"Yes Lily, the more the merrier," she replied.
*“Wait, no. That’s a false equivalency. More does not equal merry. If there were 2000 people in this compartment right now, would we be celebrating? No, we’d be suffocating.”* I replied irritably.
Everyone looked at me oddly.
"What?" I said defensively. "It's true."
"Doesn't make it nice," Sirius muttered before stepping past me and settling into a seat.
I rolled my eyes and joined him. I sat down on one of the seats and Hayden and James immediately sat either side of me. I feel like a hostage.
Nicola sat in the corner by the window next to James. Sirius, Molly, Abi and Peter occupied the seats opposite and Jess and Remus were left standing at the door.
“Oh well,” Jess grinned saucily. “Now I have an excuse to sit on your lap,” she said to Remus. He grinned but blushed a little. We all groaned as Jess sat on Remus who was on the floor by the window. He put his arms around her and they settled back comfortably.
“So go on then, what’s this game?” Abi asked leaning forward. Or she may have been leaning sideways away from Peter, who had snagged the window seat next to her.
“Truth or dare!” James exclaimed, looking round at us excitedly. I shook my head.
“No!” I said firmly. “No, no no no no no!”
“Aw but Lily, it’ll be fun,” Abi pleaded.
“Count me out. These things always end in tears,” I said wisely. Niki threw an apple at me. “Um ow? Where the hell did you get an apple from?”
“Dude, don’t be a spoilsport. It’s a harmless little game of truth or dare, what could go wrong?”
“Famous last words,” I muttered irritably. They continued to stare at me so I sighed in defeat, “fine.”
“Yay!” Molly clapped her hands. “Me first!”
“No I came up with it, me first!” James argued. Molly whipped out her wand and pointed it threateningly at his throat in one fluid motion.
“Me. First.” James paled.
“Got it,” he squeaked. Molly grinned.
“Okay um,” she looked around, eyeing each one of us. It felt like she was looking for signs of fear. Then her gaze stopped on someone. “Peter truth or dare?” she asked, looking over at a now very sweaty Peter.
“Erm, uh… umm-”
“Pick one already Pete!” Sirius exclaimed. Peter’s cheeks reddened.
“Dare!” he said quickly, evidently not thinking. No one in their right mind would accept a dare from Molly. That’s like walking right up to the Minister for Magic and calling him a prat. Does he have a death wish?
“Dude are you crazy?” Remus asked incredulously, voicing my thoughts. “You do realize you just accepted a dare from Molly right?”
“Oh no! No! No I take it back, truth! Truth!” Peter shouted hysterically. Molly smiled devilishly.
“Too late Petey. Now, what shall I make you do? Ah ha! I dare you to climb onto the roof of the train!” she announced, looking very pleased with herself.
“NO!” All of our voices echoed at once.
“Peter is not jumping out of the train,” Abi said.
“I didn’t say he had to jump out I said he had to jump on.” Molly corrected.
“Still not happening,” Niki said.
“Fine!” she said sulkily. Molly paused and then her face lit up again. Am I the only one hearing those warning sirens? “Steal a pair of Lindsey Greene’s panties.”
Lindsey Greene is a slut. That’s the nicest thing to call her. She has bleached blonde hair and an orange face. She colours in her eyebrows with Crayola crayons I’m assuming and she wears as little as possible, clothes-wise. She makes you want to say “hey wanna bit of face with that make-up?”
Lindsey’s entourage is made up of two girls, Kelly and Shelly. They’re twins but they don’t have the luxury of sharing the same brain. They also have dyed blonde hair cut in the exact same style as Lindsey’s and we call them the Clones. Rumour has it, they even went to a muggle plastic surgeon and bought Lindsey’s nose.
We don’t exactly see eye to eye to say the least.
“I can’t do that!” Peter replied in shock. “That’s got to be crossing some sort of moral line.”
“No I don’t think so.” Jess said, pretending to think. “So go on Pete, it’ll be the first pair of female underwear you’ll ever have held,” she laughed.
“To make things a little fairer you can take Lily along with you to help.” Molly said nicely.
I smiled at Molly’s kindness and then realized what she said. My smile vanished and I snapped my head up.
“What?” I shrieked. “I’m so not going into that cow’s cave of horrors! That’s like walking into an Acromantula lair and declaring yourself fresh meat!” Wow I am just full of those today.
“But Lily if you think about it logically, Lindsey hates you right-” Jess said. I squinted suspiciously and nodded slowly, on the lookout for trickery.
“-And Peter doesn’t have enough charm to get her panties by himself right-” Molly continued.
“I object to that-” Peter tried to interject.
“So logically, you’re the perfect distraction!” Jess finished, ignoring Peter. I sighed. I don’t know how they did it, but Jess and Molly managed to outsmart me with Jess Logic. What is the world coming to?
“But I- he could- I mean why do- oh never mind! Fine I’ll do it! You win!” I raised my hands in defeat.
Molly clapped her hands together happily. “Great, off you go then. We’ll watch from the door.” I groaned and wriggled out of the tight space and thick cloud of male testosterone I’d been subjected to for the last ten minutes.
I decided to be positive. Even though I felt like I was walking to my death. I linked arms with a pale looking Peter and we skipped yellow-brick-road-style to the compartment of doom. From the door, Abi and Sirius gave us a thumbs up and winked. Gits.
Releasing Peter from my skipping death grip I started to formulate a plan.
“Okay Petey old pal, this may be our last ever mission so let’s go out with a bang.” I whispered, pushing him into the conveniently empty compartment next to the Beasts’.
“What do you mean our last mission?” he asked worry etched all over his face.
“If this plan fails and it might, we could die.” I said seriously.
I wasn’t exactly joking when I said it may be our last mission, considering we were playing with the big girls here. Lindsey has the ability to crush us like bugs and there’s nothing we can do to stop her. So we might as well make it worth it.
“Okay, I’m gonna go in there and irritate her. I’ll just smile and that should be enough for her to want me dead. Then, I’m going to run. There could possibly be a duel to the death I’m not quite sure yet so while I’m keeping the Slut and the Clones busy, you sneak in there in super stealth mode and snatch those panties. Holler if you need a hand.” I instructed making the plan up as I went along. I’d be a great ninja. Just ninja-ing around like you do.
“Um okay,” Peter said sounding unsure. “We should have a code word though. You know, in case I need help?”
“Good idea Pete I don’t think the plan will work if you start yelling about how you can’t find her panties.” I thought for a minute. “How about… cheeseballs?”
“Like the crisps?” Peter grinned.
I nodded. “Okay; ready steady, let’s go get us some panties!”
“Of the frilly variety I hope.” Peter muttered under his breath. I don’t think I was meant to hear that.
I crept out of the compartment and braced myself for impact. Taking a deep breath I slid open the door with a flourish.
“Lindsey my dear, how are you? Oh it’s been far too long darling!” I announced dramatically, blowing her air kisses and interrupting their conversation. Meh, it was probably something clique-y, bitchy and totally stupid so not a total loss I suppose.
Lindsey and the clones gaped at me. Oh please, this is totally normal. They continued to stare open-mouthed. Well that’s just plain unattractive. Honey you’re gonna catch flies.
Lindsey was taking up an entire seat because she had spread her legs along it, so I did the smart thing and picked her legs up then dropped them on the floor. Sitting down in the now vacated seat, I fluffed my hair and looked around smiling at the three very confused girls. If I wasn’t such a good actress I would break character just so I could laugh at them. But you never break character because that would mean you weren’t a good actress. And I am a very
“So what are we chatting about? Oh Lindsey I meant to say, I love your jeans! They are absolutely gorgeous!” I gushed as if my heart depended on it. Lindsey looked at me as if I had just sprouted antennas and turned into a ladybug.
“Why are you looking at my legs?” she demanded. Trust Lindsey to take a compliment and horrifically twist it.
“I wasn’t!” I amended hastily.
“Then how did you see my jeans?”
“Well I- erm well I wasn’t- um-” I stumbled. “I was just making conversation.”
“About my legs?”
“Well yes, it would appear so.”
She grinned broadly. Practically beamed. Cold shivers went down my back.
“Oh Evans, I didn’t know you felt this way about me,” she smirked.
“Felt- what- oh damn.” Comprehension dawned on me slowly and painfully. “No! I do not feel that way about- oh yuck! No way-” She held a hand up.
“Please Evans don’t embarrass yourself further. Just go,” she smirked. My mouth opened and closed like a goldfish.
“I- wait, what? I-” I brandished my wand and thought about attacking Lindsey’s face. Suddenly her front teeth started to grow at an alarming rate. I heard the twins scream. “I’m so sorry!” Damn, apparently there is an ability to be too clever. I knew I shouldn’t have been practicing those non-verbal spells over the summer.
“Holy cwap!” she shouted. Well at least she’s angry. “You’re so dead Evans!” Ah too angry. She got up and tried to throw herself at me but I dodged and almost fell into the twins. They also tried to grab at me but I scrambled up and bolted from the compartment, leaving behind what felt like a chunk of hair in Shelly’s claws.
“EVANSTH GET BACK HERE!”
“I THINK NOT!” I screamed in response. I saw Peter in the other compartment and I gave him a hasty thumbs up as I passed. I flashed my hand to signify that he had five minutes before I gave into my doom.
A flash of green shot past me narrowly missing my shoulder. Holy shit she was really trying to kill me! I didn’t think she meant I was dead literally
“Impedimenta!” she screeched from behind me. I dived down onto the floor as it shot past where my head had been previously and rolled along the corridor.
“I said I’m sorry woman!” I yelled as I got back on my feet and continued running. “FORGIVE AND FORGET!” I looked around and realized I needed some support. “SOMEONE! ANYONE!” Suddenly I was joined by Jess and Niki, they ran alongside me.
“What’s going on?” Nicola asked, deflecting a spell with a flick of her wand and shooting a wordless one over her shoulder.
“Where did you guys come from?” Nicola gave me look that said ‘really, we’re doing this now?’ I grimaced. “Lindsey, legs, mistake, teeth, DEATH!” I huffed, slowing down slightly. I am highly unfit. I know.
“Furnunculus!” Jess shouted but the spell missed Lindsey and the twins, instead shattering one of the sliding doors. “I really have to work on my aim,” she muttered.
“Where are the others?” I asked. Jess and Nik shared a glance and looked at me.
“Well, Molly and Sirius are locked in the luggage compartment, Abi and Remus are trying to get them out and James and Hayden are trying to kill each other.” Jess replied. “LEVICORPUS!” We glanced back and watched in satisfaction as Shelly was blinded by a white light then strung up by her ankle and left behind.
“And you just left them?! Never mind.”
We were coming to the end of the train. “Guys we need a distraction.” I panted. Damn them and their fitness, just because they play Quidditch.
Quidditch is a stupid sport. A very stupid sport.
“Leave it to me.” Nik replied smiling. “Oppugno, oppugno!” she shouted a little too eagerly and blindfolds appeared on the two murderous girls’ faces. They stopped so suddenly they fell over each other and landed in a heap on the floor.
“Quick in here,” I said throwing myself into the compartment next to us. I crawled to a seat, panting heavily. “Oh hell,” I muttered. Suddenly the door flew open and I was on my feet again instantly, wand pointed at the intruder. It was Peter and he was triumphantly holding up a pair of pink, lacy thongs.
“Got ‘em!” he announced.
I choked back a sob.
A/N- Hey hey readers, how’s it? Well this is my new and improved chapter two, I’m sorry it took so long but I kept stopping and starting and my muse went on holiday for a while. I know this chapter is awfully long and I’m very sorry but it just flowed like this. Well I’d greatly appreciate reviews for criticism or good things!
I re-edited the edited stuffles :D
Edit- 08/04/13 - Ohmyrowling it's my OneYearAversary of fanfiction writing!!!! Today I've officially been writing for one whole year!!!!!