The rest of the summer seemed to fly by. I spent the last few days playing quidditch with the many "Wotter" cousins, being lazy with Roxy and Rose or helping George blow things up. He says that they're not supposed to blow up but I think everything is more fun that way.
Before I knew it I was being rudely awoken on September 1st. Roxy had been mean to me the night before so I had gone to sleep in my own bed for once. I hadn't really made it there though. I sort of just collapsed on top wearing a tank top and a pair of Hugh's old sweat pants.
"Nay, wake up."
"Grunt." I'm just the image of lady-ness.
"Wake up." Stupid person poked my foot which kicked out making my heel collide with stupid persons chin.
"What the hell!"
"Grunt, grunt." My social skills amaze me.
Next thing I know I'm being dragged of the bed by my ankles.
"Nooo!" I croak grabbing the edge of the mattress.
"Let go!" Stupid yells at me.
"Never!"
"Fred, what are you doing?" I hear Roxy ask from the door.
"It's Fred?!" I ask surprised. "Your traitor! I thought we were friends!"
"We were until you kicked me in the chin!"
"You poked my foot!"
"Hi James!" Roxy shouted.
I screamed let go of the mad and shouted "Where?"
Unfortunately Fred was still pulling, so he flew backwards pulling me with him when I let go of the bed. The result: I got a face full of Freddie's feet and his knees in my ribs as I landed on him.
Roxy found all of this extremely funny and was having to use the door frame for support as she laughed herself silly.
"Freddie should wake you up everyday!" She choked out between spurts of laughter. I growled at her as I pulled myself to my feet.
"Well some good did come out of all this." Fred said wincing as he stood up. "I mean besides Roxy wetting herself with laughter."
"I did not!" Roxy yelled.
"What?" I asked Fred slowly.
"I just found out you like James." He said ginning wickedly and walking past Roxy out of my room.
"Oops?" Roxy said shrugging with a smile.
"You're dead."
"Well you're gonna have to wait to kill me till we're on the train. Hurry up. We leave in half and hour."
***
Of course we didn’t leave on time. It must be a Weasley thing. It doesn’t matter when you get up you barely make it to the train every year.
We arrived at Kings cross with 10 minutes till the train left. But by the time we had everything loaded on to out trolleys we only had 4 minutes.
"All right kids, last on to the train is a blast ended skrewt!" George yelled. "Ready, set, go!"
Freddie, Roxy, and I took off running through Kings cross yelling at people to get out of the way. We ran past Rose and Hugo who were walking as fast as they could because Hermione said running would attract too much attention.
She was right.
We were being yelled at by muggles we pushed out of the way and gawked at by muggles sitting on their trains.
I looked around and say Roxy no where to be found and Freddie right in front of me. I ran through the barrier right on Freddie's heels. On the platform everyone was saying their final goodbyes and boarding the train.
We sprinted to the nearest door and fought each other to throw our stuff on the train. As I threw Mustache's basket on the train (him hissing angrily inside) Fred pushed his trolley into me blocking my way.
I threw both our trolleys aside and yelled like a maniac as I jumped on to his back. Freddie spun around to try and throw me off his back but lost his balance and fell backwards into the train.
"Success!" I yelled releasing Freddie and jumping up to do a happy dance.
"You cheated!" He protested as he stood rubbing his backside.
"Did not! We just had to get on the train first there weren't any other rules!" I yelled back stopping my victory dance so I could glare at him. "Besides you still beat Roxy." I added pointing to the platform where she had just run through the barrier followed by Rose, Hugo, and the Potters.
"Ha-ha you a blast ended skrewt!" Freddie called mockingly to Roxy as we helped everyone pull their trunks onto the train.
"Shut up!" She growled lifting her trunk up to us.
We had just pulled up the last trunk when the train started to move.
The parents, who had finally caught up, ran forward shouting goodbyes and warnings to behave as we pulled people on to the train.
Lily got on first followed by Rose and Roxy. The boys started jogging alongside the train as we pulled up Hugo. Al jumped on and James started running flat out trying to grab Freddie's outstretched hand.
We all stood at the doorway yelling encouragements as he ran trying to get closer. Finally he was able to grab Freddie's hand and jumped on to the train as Freddie pulled knocking us all over into a heap in the corridor.
"You all really should make it to the train sooner, or one of these days you'll actually miss it." I looked up to see an upside down Molly glaring at us, already in her school robes with her new Hufflepuff prefect badge pinned to the front.
"You can't gibe people detention for almost missing the train Molly." said Albus who had extracted himself from the pile of bodies and was attempting to pull Hugo off Lily.
"Well you should be setting a better example Albus. You're a prefect so it's your duty to the school to be a role model to other students."
"Just shut up." James said as he offered a hand to me and Rose and pulled us to our feet.
"There you are! Louis and I saved compartments." Dom said smiling as she walked toward us. Molly hugged and stalked off to the prefect carriage.
"What's up with her? Dom asked as she reached us.
"I'm setting a bad example by not encouraging my dad to break muggle traffic laws so we'll be on time for the train." Albus replied rolling his eyes.
"Nah, she's just embarrassed by you guys." Lucy said walking up. "I'd hurry to that prefect meeting though. The heads aren't going to be too impressed if you show up late."
Rose and Albus hurried off to their prefect meeting while the rest of us took our stuff to the compartments. Roxy and I bribed Louis with chocolate to make him store the luggage in the girl's compartment before reminding him that he was late for his first prefect meeting.
"So how come you were all late this year?" Dom asked as we all sat down.
"What Al said. Dad left to late to beat traffic." Lily replied as she stretched out.
"Same for us," Roxy said. "Although I wouldn’t have been surprised if it had been because Nay wouldn't get up."
"Hey! I got up in plenty of time!"
"No you didn't you had to eat breakfast in the car." Fred said walking in to our compartment with James.
"So did you!"
"That's because I was supposed to wake you up and you wouldn't get out of bed!"
"Well you failed to because you're a butt, and tried to remove me from my bed forcefully."
"Well now I know that next time I just have to do what Roxy did and shout 'Hi J-'"
"NOOO!" I screamed and jumped at him covering his mouth and knocking him into the door.
I glared at Roxy, who was bent over with laughter, while Fred tried to remove my hands from his mouth. "This is your fault you evil little, EWW!" Freddie had licked my hand in a last desperate attempt to breath. I wiped my hands off on his shirt while the girls and James roared with laughter.
"What happened?" Lily asked still giggling.
"Roxy accidentally spilled one of Nay's secrets, about a boy." Fred said wiggling his eyebrows at me.
We heard a wicked laugh from the door and I turned to see the devil's spawn standing there. Okay not really, her father is quite nice but she's like all the children's stories super villains rolled into one. In personality only, unfortunately.
Maria Goldstein had started making my life hell before we even got on the train first year.
I had just said good bye to my parents and was skipping off to the train, like the cure little 11 year old I was, when she came out of nowhere and ran me over with her trolley.
Needless to say I've hated her guts since then.
"I'm sorry but I thought you said that she had a secret about a boy." the bitch cackled form the door. "No boy in the world would even look at her twice, even if she had started dressing like a slut."
I looked down at my denim shorts, flip flops, and loose v-neck tee then back at her skin tight tube top and mini skirt that barely covered her arse, with a look of complete confusion on my face.
"I'm confused." I admitted.
"I am too." Freddie said," 'cos the only slut I see is standing unwelcome in the door."
"Oh Fred, I'm hurt." She pouted. "I was hoping we could get to know each other better this year." She looked Freddie up and down, her eyes lingering in a certain area, and licked her lips.
"That was subtle." James said sarcastically.
"Oh don't worry James. There's plenty of me to go around."
"Okay ewwww!" Lily interjected loudly.
James rolled his eyes. "Nay don't listen to this tart." he said jerking his head toward Maria. "And I like your new cloths. You look hot."
I tried very hard not to blush (and failed) while Maria huffed and stomped out giving Freddie one more simpering look before Roxy slammed the door shut in her face.
"You." I said turning to Freddie trying my hardest to have a very frightening look on my face. "Promise you won't say anything!"
"Sorry Nay, I can't do that." He said grinning.
"Fred promise Renee you won't tell anyone or I'll go tell Maria Goldstein that you spent all summer having sex dreams about her." Dom said coming to my aid.
Freddie looked slightly ill. "I promise!" he said quickly.
"Pinky swear!" I demanded holding up my pinky.
"Pinky swear." he said linking his pinky with my own, a small smile on his face.
"Good." I nodded. "And you know if you break a pinky swear your pinky falls off, then you'll walk funny."
"What does walking have to do with your pinky?" Roxy asked clearly confused with my logic.
"You'd be off balance. Duh!"
"That's dumb." Lily said. "Anyway," she continued ignoring my glare. "James, Fred, out."
"Why?" James whined.
"Because this is supposed to be girl time. It's the last we'll get with all of us together for a while."
"That's dumb. We're gonna stay till the prefects get back. Freddie said settling down into a seat.
And that's when brilliant idea number two hit me. And this one is more brilliant than brilliant idea number one, I think.
"Ugh, does anyone have and extra tampon? I'm all out. Rox, you usually have your period at the same time as me. Do you have an extra one?"
"I do have it, but I'm all out too. Dom don't you have yours now?"
The boys were starting to look uncomfortable.
"I'm out too. And I really need one. Lily?"
"I'm out too. What are we going to do? If I don't change it soon it may explode!"
"Rose might have some." James suggested clearing his throat.
"But she won't be back for a while." Dom whined.
"Roxy groaned loudly. "Shit, these cramps are hell."
I started sniffling. "What are we gonna do?" With three other brothers I had perfected the cry on command trick. "What if Rose never comes back?" Tears were freely falling from my eyes now. "We're gonna die!" I wailed.
Freddie and James looked alarmed.
From next to the window Lily started sniffling too. "I'm never going to see Daddy again!" Now Lily was crying just as hard as I was.
"Oh, Lils…" James started awkwardly.
"I'm never going to play quidditch again!" Roxy sobbed.
Dom collapsed into my shoulder hiding her face because of her inability to fake tears thanks to the lack of and older brother. "I'm never going to have sex again!" She wailed.
James and Fred ran as fast at they could out of the compartment.
As soon as we could no longer hear their footsteps we all burst out laughing. And then we couldn't stop. Every time we were all just about calmed down we would look at each other and start right back up again.
We were still laughing when Rose got back from her prefects meeting followed by Molly (unfortunately) 20 minutes later.
"What's so funny?" Rose asked while Molly just looked at us in disgust and started reading in the corner farthest away from us.
We managed to cough out the story between laughing fits and when we finished Rose join in on out hysterical laughter fest.
Molly, finally having enough, stormed out of the compartment. The slamming doors somehow made us sober up, and stop laughing.
"I thought Hufflepuffs were supposed to be cheerful and friendly." Lily said
"Ignore her." Rose said. "Anyway, what were James and Fred doing in here in the first place?" Rose asked wiping the tears from her eyes.
"Fred was trying to spread my secrets to the world." I answered.
"You don't have any secrets." Rose said.
"She had one." Lily corrected. "The being in love with my brother one." She then proceeded to pretend to be sick all over the floor. A charmer that Lily Potter.
"Oh yeah, the James secret. How did Freddie find out?"
"Roxy." I scowled. "She let it slip while he was trying to wake me up."
"I take it he wasn't successful then." Rose sniggered knowing only too well what it took to wake me up.
"When I walked in he had progressed to trying to pulling her out by her ankles. She didn't even know it was him until I said his name and then they started screaming at each other about no longer being friends, and it was giving me a bloody migraine so I yelled 'Hi James'." Roxy looked mighty proud of herself as the girls laughed at misfortunes.
When we got to Hogsmead station we dawdled on the platform cooing loudly about how cute all the first year boys were making them blush as they hurried off to the boats.
We then stuffed ourselves into one of the last carriages with a couple of Hufflepuff second years who looked like they were shiting themselves all the way to the castle.
At the doors to the Great Hall we made a scene saying good bye to Dom as she left us to sit at the Ravenclaw table.
During the sorting we entertained ourselves by making faces at the first years causing them to laugh at all the wrong moments. When one was sorted into Gryffindor we cheered and danced and thought of a nickname for them that we then forgot almost immediately after sitting back down.
"I feel bad for those first years." Lily said as we started the feast. "They probably think they were sorted into the mad house."
"They were." Said Fred piling food a foot high on his plate.
"At least it will be till those three graduate." Said James gesturing to us with a chicken leg.
"Hey!" Rose, Roxy, and I chorused. "Jinx!"
"Nah, I think we'll still be the clown house, and the best house, long after we all graduate." Chuckled James and Freddie's roommate Nick Wood.
"Yeah, I mean after all Lilykins will still be here." added their other roommate Ben Jordan.
We all laughed as we watched Ben cower under Lily's glare.
When we had all stuffed ourselves too full to move, Professor McGonagall stood to make her start of term speech and the whole school fell silent at once.
"To our new students, welcome. To our old students welcome back to another year at Hogwarts." The girls and I started cheering loudly and we were soon joined by the rest of the hall.
McGonagall gave us a faint smile before continuing. "Alright settle down. First years note that the forbidden forest is, obviously, forbidden. Older students you will receive detention for going in the forest, so just don't." James and Freddie exchanged smirks with Nick and Ben.
"A list of forbidden items is attached to the caretaker's door. Also Mr. Filch, " McGonagall continued motioning to the ancient man who looks as if he should have dropped dead years ago, "would like me to remind you that there is a blanket ban on anything bought at Weasley's Wizard Wheezes, with the exception of Pygmy Puffs only."
"And Niffer puffs when they're invented." I muttered to Freddie.
"It's not possible Renee!" Freddie muttered back.
"Yes it is!"
"No, it's not!"
"Is too."
"Is not."
"Is too."
"Is not."
"Is too!"
"Is not, times infinity!"
"You're a butt."
"Yeah well you're butty-er!"
"Oh yeah? Well you're the butty-est! So ha!"
"Shut up!" We both glared at Rose. "The speech is over. Can we go now?"
"Yes!" I cried jumping up excitedly. "Time to escort the ickle firsties!"
"First years! Over here please!" Roxy yelled standing on the bench.
A group of small children crept towards us, all trying hard not to look like they were about to shit themselves. And all of them failing miserably.
"Come on, don't be shy." Rose cooed "We're just going to give you some advice and show you up to the common room."
"Alright then!" Roxy said jumping down from the bench. "First we're gonna tell you some secrets."
"Bur only if you promise to keep then to yourselves." Rose warned. All the firsties nodded eagerly.
"You see that boy?" I asked them pointing at Freddie's retreating back. "The one with the caramel skin that looks like Roxy?"
"Only ugly." Roxy added.
"Well if you kick him in the shins, just right, he burps out butterflies."
"And you see that dark haired boy next to him?" Roxy added. "If you jump on his back rainbows come out of his booty."
The firsties were looking at the retreating cousins in awe.
"No do you see that boy all the way over there, the one with the blond hair?" Rose added unexpectedly, pointing across the hall at Scorpius Malfoy. "If you latch on to his legs and call him daddy, he grows a beard and starts throwing candy and galleons." Roxy and I exchanged a glance.
***
"So," Roxy started when we were in out dorm later. "Daddy, huh?"
"What do you mean?" Rose asked.
"She means, are you using little firsties for playing a sick game of house with Scorpius Malfoy?"
"What?" Rose asked her voice an octave higher. "I don't know what you're talking about. Why would I play games with Malfoy? I just thought it would be funny." She then turned her back to us and climbed into her bed.
"Oh come on! Don't give us that crap!" Roxy whined.
"I'm going to bed. Good night." Rose then closed her hangings before we could say anything else to her.
"She's in denial." I said climbing into my own bed.
"No she's not!" Rose called from behind her curtains.
Laughing I closed my own curtains, snuggled up with Moustache, and went to sleep.
A/N: I'm sooooo sorry about the long wait! Really I am. I didn't really expect it to take this long. Feel free to throw rotten vegetables my way.
Anyway I've been getting some reviews saying you're confused on why it says Fred/OC in the summery. Just wait, we'll get there eventually.
So I hope you like this chapter and I will try to not make you wait as long for the next one to come out.
Please review! If you do the magic box will give you a sweet tea!! Yummmm! (I'm kind of addicted to them right now…)
~Lunalu
Write a Review Love and Moustaches: Chapter 5: Of Ex-Friends and Ickle Firsties
Printer Friendly Version
