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Predictably Sponanteous by PolyJuice_
Chapter 1 : Broom Cupboards and Hell
Rating: MatureChapter Reviews: 5

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Purgatory, Hell, karma, prison; call it whatever you want. Professor McGonagall insists on calling it ‘Transfiguration’ for example. So does Dumbledore. Although I detected a slight twinkle in his eyes when I barged into his office last Tuesday, demanding its name be changed. But either way, I'm still stuck here.

"Two feet of parchment on the different uses of animal transfiguration, to be handed to me – complete - by the next lesson.” The stern voice of McGonagall rang out. The class gave a collective groan, which started her on about how N.E.W.T.s were next year. Luckily, the bell rang before she got too immersed.

"Jenny!" A deep voice called out to me flirtatiously as I exited the classroom as quickly as I could. "Broom cupboard is free. Care to join me?" I turned around to see Amos Diggory standing behind me, a smirk on his face.

"Sure!" I cried in mock-delight, clasping my hands together. "But I wonder if your height is proportionate to...the rest of you." I looked him up and down before adding, "I sure hope not."
Amos scowled at me for the taunt on his height, a sensitive topic for him, before stalking off down the corridor. "Going cave-man are we now? Tsk-tsk. And here I was, thinking you couldn't sink any lower. How naive of me,” I muttered, rolling my eyes as he turned the corner.

"Jenny!" A familiar voice cried out to me in indignance. "You know as a prefect I should report you and give you a detention for that, right? And I ought to. It'd do you the world of good; deflate your head. Its almost as big as James'!" Lily said rolling  her eyes.

"Ah, but Lils, you wouldn't do that. Who can resist this face?" I gave her my most angelic smile as she scowled at me, knowing there was truth to my words. However much she wanted to deny it, we both knew she’d never put me in detention. As we walked, I realised something important, my eyes widened, "Did you just call him James?" I shouted in glee. Maybe she was finally seeing sense.

"Its his name." She replied, somewhat coldy.

"Of course it is." I winked.

“Come on, let’s drop our bags off before dinner. I’m starving.” She said, still a bit testy.

I agreed, aware of my hungry stomach, as we made our way up the four flights of stairs towards Gryffindor Tower.

“But seriously, Transfiguration is Hell reincarnated. I don’t know how you stand it,” I grumbled when we turned into the corridor that housed the entrance to the Gryffindor Common Room. Lily chuckled in reply as we neared the Fat Lady.

“It’s really not that bad, Jen. McGonagall is a great teacher, you’re just far too stubborn to realize. Its one of your… lesser qualities.”

“Are you kidding? I’m amazing, I have none of those!” I snorted in a huff. All I got was a scoff in return however. “I think I’ll crash in the guys dorm tonight. Jess snores too loudly, and Rach and Alice talk far too much.”

“You promised you’d stop that! People will think you’re some kind of a slut!” She said in an exasperated tone, though at my raised eyebrow she added, “Although they might be right.”
It was my turn to scoff now, but before I could add anything more we approached the Fat Lady.


“Pertinax.” Lily nodded, as the portrait hole swung open. The prefect stepped aside, implying I go first and I made my way into the Common Room, only to find myself on the floor almost instantly. Sirius Black, infamous heartthrob of Hogwarts and the one man everyone wanted but very rarely had, had ploughed into me, leaving me lying beneath him on the floor. "Ugh, Sirius, not everyone wants you to jump them any time of day,” Lily muttered, clearly irritated.

“Oh, I don’t know… I mean most girls would kill to be where Jen is right now.” Sirius grinned, turning his head to wink at Lily who just rolled her eyes.

“Agh! You. Need. To. Loose. Weight,” I grunted at him, atempting to shove him off.

“I disagree, as I happen to be perfect in every possible way.”
I rolled my eyes as I hauled myself off the ground, before making my way up to the dormitories, signifying the end of our conversation.


"Please! You fancy him, and he’s mad about you," said Lily, a twinge of jealousy in her voice.

"No thanks. I wouldn't want a Wer - I don't want Remus,” I corrected quickly, catching myself before I let slip Lupin's biggest secret; something he wasn’t even aware I knew. I have no problem with him being a werewolf, but to be honest? I didn't want a serious relationship, and I knew he would. "I mean, our relationship is strictly platonic."

"I suppose..." said Lily rather wistfully.

"I think that you fancy him actually. Not me, " I teased.
Lily’s face turned red, before she muttered something along the lines of, “whatever. It’s time to sleep now anyway.”

I raised an eyebrow in mock-hurt. "This conversation is far from over Miss Evans! Besides, James will be crushed at this news. He’s been waiting for is turn since third year! ."

“Oh, please.” She laughed. “Its not like his feelings are real anyway. I’m seen as that "pretty, prefect" girl. He barely knows me, and I doubt it’s anything more than lust.”

“Whatever you say.” I chuckled, before rolling onto my other side and letting my exhaustion take over.


 Short, I know. But this is my first. Please R&R!

Thank you so much to my amazing Beta Reader, Atellam. 

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