Chapter 5 : Crazy L.C.
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“It is two days, you toe-rag!”
“Three days, you troll!”
”Oh that’s real original!”
“Which your face isn’t!”
“Stop it for Merlin’s sake!” a shriek came from the left. I whirled around to see Alice Logan, her face bright pink with embarrassment. Alice was a quiet, secluded girl. She never wanted to draw attention to herself. She looked way too much like a tomato at the glares not only I was sending her, but the ones Black was sending her.
“Well, tell him I’m right, then!” I said, giving Sirius a very pointed look. He rolled his eyes, but looked at Alice to see who she would side with.
Of course she would side with me; I was her roommate! There hadn’t been a time when I didn’t stick up for her or tell her when she looked ugly in something (well, someone had to do it!). Though she probably thought I was just as loony as every else, she was one of the only people who was nice enough to me. She glanced in between me and Sirius and took a huge breath in before letting words fall out of her mouth.
“Sirius is right, not you, Lenny.” She said, as though she was afraid of my reaction. Like I would bite her or something…tempting.
My mouth went slack and Sirius smirked at me and turned back to our potion that he had ordered me not to touch (again). I had resorted to small talk, which had gotten us in an argument over how many days it was until our Quidditch match against Ravenclaw. It was three, I swear! Today was Thursday. That was one day. Tomorrow was Friday and the next day was Saturday (the day of the game). There are three days there, not two!
How many hours until the game, though? Well, there was about…48? Yes, we did play on Saturday around this time. 48 hours, that was two days. Bollucks, maybe he was right. I gave him a glare for good measure. I wouldn’t ever let him know he was right, anyways, so no harm done.
“Just figure out I was right, did you?” Sirius asked, not pulling his eyes away from the potion. I felt my body burning. Of course perfect Sirius Black would be able to read my mind. He just has to be able to do everything, doesn’t he?
Maybe he could even fly without a broom. I glanced down at his feet, just to make sure they weren’t lifting off the ground (he was pretty tall, so maybe I just wasn’t noticing it?). Thankfully, they were spread slightly too far apart, but on the ground nevertheless. I sighed in relief, which Sirius seemed to take as a sigh of discontent for him actually reading my mind correctly.
“You’re just predictable, that’s all….and I’m never wrong,” he added, throwing some wings into the potion. The whole time, he didn’t look up at me once.
“Just eat a wing while you’re at it!” I hissed, unable to come up with anything suitable. Sirius rolled his eyes, unable to even come up with anything in return.
Ha. I win.
So the game was in two days, no big deal. I felt prepared…or at least I thought I did. I wasn’t the best Quidditch player, but somehow I had managed to get on the team back in my third year as the keeper. I hadn’t known what the captain had seen in me then, but somehow he had turned me into something good. We’ve won the Quidditch Cup every year since my fifth year. Potter had gotten the captain’s badge this year, something that he took so much pride in that he took to making us practice over the summer as well.
I had been to the hospital wing five times because of his antics with me! A keeper doesn’t dive! If I bat the ball away, that’s the chasers job to go get it, not me! Nevertheless, this year, I was expected to do just that. Bloody captains and their bloody authority. If I was captain, we’d spend our time inventing a broom cushion. Maybe we won’t win, but at least we will be comfortable.
I won’t have to feel like I have a stick up my butt, quite literally.
Which is why, sitting on this broom right now, was causing me extreme pain. Normally, Quidditch players could look past it, but not me. I had a bony butt to begin with, so it was like rubbing stick and stick together. I felt as though a fire would irrupt beneath my bottom and I wouldn’t even know it since it was already becoming extremely numb. Damn Potter.
I watched in slow motion as our three chasers came racing towards me. I should really start to pay attention more. The quaffle was passed to Potter, who smirked as he sent it soaring towards the hoop I was furthest away from. I zoomed up to it, managing to catch the quaffle right on my fingertips. I sighed in relief, knowing that if I would have missed it, I would have gotten hell for it. Potter acted as though nargles were inside his head.
They probably were.
I tossed him the quaffle back, just to notice how red his face was. Was he mad at me? I had made the bloody catch, hadn’t I?
“You were in the wrong position, Crowley!” Potter growled at me, looking ready to explode. I could never do anything right, could I?
“I got the quaffle, Pothead!” I shouted back, unable to contain my pride. I was a Gryffindor for a reason.
His face got redder as he heard my retaliation. Alice Logan groaned from her position next to him, knowing a common fight was coming. It seemed the whole team did, because everyone stopped their training and came flying over to where James and I were hovering by the goal posts.
“Barely!” James shrieked, flying closer to me. It seemed as though his face was as red as Lily Evans’ hair. He probably did it on purpose to try to show her how much he loved her. I snorted, but not from his comment, but from my little joke.
“Crowley, can’t you ever just shut your mouth?” Black asked, flying over to James’s side. It seemed as though they were building up a front against me. I already felt myself shrink smaller. They looked like giants compared to me right now. I nearly let out a whimper, until I felt our tiny seeker, Michael, fly up next to me.
“Hey, leave her alone, she caught the quaffle, didn’t she?” he defended, his voice small and quite girly. I’m sure he hadn’t matured yet, being that he was only a third year. I nearly groaned again. Two very large seventh years against us two? Not really all that fair.
“Michael, go back to training!” Potter hissed. I felt the body heat roll off of Michael, but before he was willing to protest, he flew away, leaving me alone once again.
“He’s right, I caught it. You’re just being a sour puss because you didn’t make it in like you thought you would.” I retaliated, almost biting my words when his face seemed to be growing purple.
Well, my theory about him trying to flatter Evans might have been wrong, but maybe he was just a metamorphmagus. It would make sense, the Potters came from a pure blood line. I contemplated if I had ever seen him with different hair or a different nose. He did recover really fast from a broken nose back in our fifth year. Maybe he had fixed it himself with his metamorphmagus powers.
He was staring straight at me, his eyebrows raised. Oh Merlin, he had said something, hadn’t he? I pursed my lips, trying to come up with a good retort, but not knowing what he had said, I wasn’t exactly sure what was going to come out of my mouth. I opened it, prepared for my word throw-up to roll straight out of it and of course, it did.
“Oh, go swim with the Giant Squid. It could be your new best mate, since Black will be too wrapped up with his L.C. chick.” My voice was a hiss, not its normal bubbly joking tone. I was shocked myself, because when I did insult, it never had any note of sincerity to it.
“How the bloody hell do you even know about L.C?” Sirius asked, glaring at me as though he was protecting his jewels. I let out a harsh laugh.
Well, it may be the fact that I am her. It may be the fact that I have your letter under my bed, taped to the bottom of the mattress so no one will find it. I could know about L.C because you are pathetically sending me letters.
“Because” was all that came out of my mouth. It was a childish response, but the only one that came out.
“Everyone knows about her, mate.” Ludo Bagman said from the right. Him and Sirius were our beaters, both large and both rather scary looking. When I looked over to Ludo, he sent me a small smile, knowing not to take sides in a Lenny/James fight. I returned it, unsure if he had been giving me the smile because he felt sorry for me or because he mentally was siding with me.
When I looked back at Sirius, his face was almost as red as James face had been. I groaned and rolled my eyes. “If we aren’t going to practice, can I go?” I asked.
James finally seemed to notice that everyone was still just hovering in the air and his face broke out of its hard stare towards me and went into his “captain” face. This meant that it turned to stone, hard set eyes, and pinkish tint to his face. “Get back to practice! We aren’t going to beat Ravenclaw like this!” He shrieked, flying away with his chasers.
As I pulled my practice pads off, I heard a small cough in the corner of the locker room. The only two girls on the team were me and Alice Logan. Alice was a chaser, small and fast, but insanely quiet. James had lectured her time and time again about communication while on the pitch, but it never did much, so he learned to let it be. Alice had boring blonde hair that brushed the top of her shoulders. Her big blue eyes shone beneath her long eyelashes, making her positively beautiful.
Or at least that’s what people told me. I’m not all too good of a judgment. I thought orange looked good with green, but apparently people thought otherwise. I also thought the witch models you see on posters could use some more fat, but apparently insanely skinny was attractive.
“Lenny, did you hear me?” Alice asked, with her small voice. I looked up at her, my eyes slightly glazed and gave her a small smile.
“Sorry Alice, was a bit out of it. What’d you say?” I asked. She gave me my own sheepish smile back. Not like I didn’t hear her head screaming RUN LENNY’S INSANE!
I don’t think insane was contagious, but who am I to know? I probably caught insane from my parents. They were a bit loony as well. Teddy must be immune to the insane gene in our family.
“Lenny, I know it’s you.” She said, smiling beneath her long eyelashes. I paused, feeling like déjà vu was coming over me. Great, not only did Remus and Teddy know, but now Alice did too!
“Know what?” I asked, trying to be nonchalant about it. Would Alice tell Sirius? Hadn’t they dated or something? What if she was insanely jealous that he was writing me these letters and was so overcome with jealousy that she killed me?
No one would see that one coming. Sweet little Alice Logan killing someone? No way. Crazy Lenny probably just killed herself. People probably thought I was holding my wand the wrong way when trying to explode a bug and exploded myself instead. That’s actually very probable. It is rather hard to know which side of my wand was the tip. It all looked the same to me.
“The whole team knows it’s you, Lenny. The only person who doesn’t is Sirius, but he’s rather thick, isn’t he?” Alice chuckled slightly, but proceeded to fold her clothes neatly into her bag. Who folds dirty clothes?
Trying to look like I wasn’t such of a pig, I examined my clothes very closely before placing them into my bag gently, though that didn’t get rid of the fact that it was a mess. Almost as bad as my book bag. That thing could eat my hand off, I was sure of it.
“I-I don’t know what you’re talking about. Run into Xeno Lovegood or something?” I asked, trying to be humorous, but always coming up short. I never was able to crack a joke when I was under pressure.
“Lenny, he lost is Loony record when you tried to beat the nargles with your broomstick,” She said. I remembered that, but hey, I was drunk! “That’s not my point. Someone is going to tell Sirius soon and if this doesn’t stop, someone’s going to get hurt.”
Sadly, Alice was right. Someone would tell Sirius if the whole team knew. James was his best mate after all. They were like two girls the way they were friends. I was sure if not damn certain that James would tell Sirius. It would only be a matter of time before Sirius came stomping in here, accused me of intercepting the letters between him and his “perfect girl” and did it as a prank to him.
That wouldn’t have been a bad idea, actually.
“Look…Remus and Teddy already told me to stop and I’m going to. I just had to get my point across, that’s all!” I defended, slinging my bag over my shoulder.
“By changing his shampoo every day before practice to dung smelling? That’s hardly getting one’s point across.” Alice said, shaking her head at me.
Wait…Alice didn’t know! That meant the whole team didn’t know! That meant…well, it meant Sirius didn’t and wouldn’t know. I sighed in relief, but Alice looked at me like I was more loony, but that didn’t matter. I was still in the clear with all of this!
“CROWLEY! I’M GOING TO KILL YOU!” I suddenly heard, making me jump backwards. I felt my already painful bottom crash against a nearby locker. I let out a yelp, not only from the pain, but from the voice outside the locker room doors.
“I’m guessing they told him.” Alice said, shrugging and walking through the door. I got a glimpse of Sirius’s face, beat red with what looked like wet poo dripping down his face. ‘
I couldn’t stop my laughter. It rang throughout the whole locker room, echoing off the walls. My side hurt so much from my laughing, but I didn’t care because it felt so good. I had pulled one over on Sirius Black (other than the obvious L.C thing)! I felt accomplished and so amazing that no one could pull me down.
“Think that’s funny, do you?” Sirius barked, somehow managing to make it into the girl’s locker room (which was supposed to be magically barred from boys).
“Its…your face!-Oh you look…just darling!” I couldn’t choke back my laugher. In between words I was howling at the dung dripping down his face. He smelt horrible, but he didn’t seem to be bothered by it.
“Have they been changing it until today? I would have thought this would have happened a lot sooner.” I asked once I had finally managed to calm down. Sirius seemed to be at a complete loss for words.
“You’re disgusting, you know that? I cannot believe you- no actually, I do believe you would be so pathetic.” Sirius started, his arms flinging in the air at his tirade.
“You look like a monkey doing that.” I interrupted, pointing at his flailing arms. Well, he really did. He looked like he was trying to swing from branch to branch and failing.
“UGH CROWLEY! You’re so infuriating! It’s no wonder you’ve never had a boyfriend, no one would ever want you!” Sirius barked. I paused, not sure how to respond.
He wanted me. He wanted all my attention. He was the one that was pathetic enough to send me two letters already, basically begging me for my attention. I smiled at him, showing my large teeth. “Well, Mr. Black…I beg to differ.” Was all I got out before I bursted into laughter again, this time falling to the ground and rolling around.
“You’re crazy, you know that?” Sirius growled, before leaving the locker room.
Crazy Lenny Crowley.
So again... a filler. In all honesty, I didn't enjoy writing this chapter too much. I made Lenny a little more serious, giving you some more insight to her head. I don't like making a serious Lenny, but there will be a few chapters where she is serious. Haha, Sirius, gettit?
Anywho, I'm really loving responding to reviews. I really really love it. So you know what that means?! Me and Lenny would love some more reviews!! I just truly want to know what you think about all of this. So let us know. Since it is the end of my semester, I will be updating more frequently, but it all depends on how fast it gets posted by staff. So <3 from Lenny and I.
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