Chapter 14 : Content with Loneliness
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One thing after another, things were happening too fast for, before I knew it, it was already mid-November and I was slowly walking towards class. So many events have occurred these past few months that I had to keep a journal just to keep up. For one, I know that the Marauders are animaguses and there is a werewolf walking around in our school. I figured that James is the stag and Sirius is the dog because he looks like one.
Now it was between Peter and Remus but I already knew the answer before I even thought about it.
Remus is a werewolf.
My head bent low, my arms wrapped around my textbook, as I slid into a random seat. Nobody even noticed me walk in, not a single glance.
As if nothing had changed.
I looked up at the wall and thought about Remus. When I figured it out two days ago, I was freaked out and avoided him for a day but now I'm over that because I know Remus. He wouldn't hurt anyone if he had the choice. The cry of the werewolf echoed in my head and I felt guilty for ignoring him when it was obviously not his fault.
The day ended up going slow, just as expected on days that you weren't feeling too confident. Do you know those days that you just keep staring at the clock, which ticked the seconds away, but the end of the period never seemed to come?
It seemed that seventh period would never come to an end.
Yes, only seventh period and I still have one more to go - History of Magic. This is going to give me a chance to talk to Remus since I didn't talk to him for the past two days. I wonder if I should tell him that I know?
Then the sound of the bell echoed through the corridors and I bolted out of the room and towards the History of Magic classroom. I was disappointed to see that Remus wasn't there yet. I sat down slowly and started to take out my things.
After 10 minutes, the seat next to me was filled by a tired looking Remus. I rested my head on my arm and watched as he took out his supplies for the class. Dark circles drooped below his warm, brown eyes that still sparkled. His scars and scratches were profound - and looked like they had re-opened.
It all made sense now, though.
Remus was now searching for a quill in his bag as I glanced at his bandage wrapped hand that was resting on the table when he finally sat down. Before I thought about it, my hand slid over his wounded one and delicately squeezed it. Then I realised what I just did and retrieved my hand.
My cheeks reddened a bit when Remus looked at me with a curious look but I turned the other way to avoid eye contact. For the rest of the period, we were silent ever since the close contact between us. Thanks to me, of course, for making things awkward between us.
I crossed my fingers, hoping for the bell to ring sooner.
Finally, after waiting for eternity, it rung and I quickly stood up. "Um... see you, Remus." Then I practically ran out of the classroom and straight into Lily who was passing by. "Oh, sorry, Lily!"
"It's fine," she said, waving it off, as she recollected herself.
"Anyways, I'm heading to the Library, see you soon!"
Lily laughed and said, "why are you in such a hurry?"
"Shhh! It's secret," I said teasingly and grinned. After that I ran off in the other direction and into the safe security of the Library.
Okay, so not only do I know Remus is a werewolf but I also just made things between us awkward. Furthermore, I have this Jake guy on my back when I have hinted him so many times that he should just find someone else. To add onto that? I don't know what's going on with my dad, he hasn't sent me back a reply yet.
Just one more sentence, that's all I needed. Unfortunately, inspiration decided to run out on me so I sat there, with my head in my hand, searching through my brain for something. One feeble sentence, damn. Please, Merlin?
"Oh, hi, Remus, I didn't see you there."
I immediately looked up to see where the sentence came from. My eyes rested on the sight of Lily a few tables away. I lowered my head down. I watched as Remus was talking to her about something, definitely not about the homework.
"No, I understand. Are you going to do something about it?"
What could they possibly be talking about? Do you think it was about him being a werewolf? No, but Lily wouldn't know, why would she know? What could it possibly be? This is going to kill me.
Because, like they say, curiosity killed the cat.
"So, you're not going to tell her?" Lily said a bit loudly and blushed as Remus told her "shh!" It was something that was only between the two of them so it couldn't be homework or his secret. I thought I was going to bang my head on the desk if I didn't figure it out. I was place into Ravenclaw for a reason, right?
But I couldn't hear another word that came out of their conversation.
Quidditch practices were picking up and the first game of the year was going to be kicked off by a promising Gryffindor versus Slytherin match.
But, the question now is, what the hell am I doing here?
I'm sitting here in the cold watching Quidditch practices?
What is wrong with me?
After twelve minutes of trying to remember the reason why I came to the pitch and then discovering that Quidditch practices are actually really boring, I left.
Besides, the game wasn't until next week. So, basically, I'm an idiot but I think you all knew that already.
"Oi! Alice! Alice, OI! Wait up, Liddell!"
Oh, no, not this guy again. I thought I had gotten rid of him awhile ago. Then, I shuddered as I remember the horrid Hogsmeade day I had. Let's just not bring that up again, yea? I would like that very much.
Unfortunately, Jake finally caught up to me.
"Hey," he said, out of breath.
"Hello... again," I said, crossing my arms since it was a bit chilly because it was early in the morning - this only adds more proof to my insanity.
"I just that, well, m-maybe we should, you know... talk?" he ended his sentence with a question. Wow, this guy is so unsure about everything he does. You know, I noticed that his voice cracked several times.
I tucked a strand of blonde hair behind my ear and said, "Are you okay?"
"Yea, yea, I'm fine," Jake said and then did what I called the "James-Potter-idiocy-move."
He ran his hand through his hair.
I let out a laugh. Why do they all do that? James started it in second year and now every boy in Hogwarts is doing it. Do they this it's cool or soemthing? Because, honestly, I think it just makes you look like a deranged duck.
That's the truth and it hurts, especially if you are James Potter.
"Nothing," I said, grinning from memories of all those years Lily would scream at him for doing that nervous habit of his. I wonder if the guys in Hogwarts know that James only does that because he's nervous? Hmm... curious, very curious.
"N-no, tell me."
I started to walk and Jake didn't fail to walk along with me.
"It's that thing you just did."
"What thing?" he asked, his eyes growing wider.
"Are you nervous about something?" I asked, arching my eyebrow up.
"I'm fine, cool, swell. Yea, h-how about you?" Jake asked, shoving his hands into his pockets and looking at the ground.
"I'm good. But I don't think that's the reason why you are here," I said.
He took a deep breath and turned to me, stopping, "listen, Alice, I need you to hear me out this time. No interruptions."
Now it was my turn to worry. I hate any sort of pep talks, love talks, or small talks, they all just equal awkward to me. I do not do well in awkward situations.
I was about to say something until he cut in and said, "please."
Closing my mouth, I sat on a bench as he sat next to me.
"Alice. I have to be honest with you, I never really noticed you until last year-"
I rolled my eyes, how nice.
"-but, when I did, I found a different person in you. You aren't like the other girls, you're witty and smart. I would really like to have a relationship with you," Jake said in a 'lovey dovery' voice, which I hate.
I looked at him with both my eyebrows raised. His green eyes waited for my reaction and I asked, "are you legit?"
"Shh! You have got to take some yoga classes, man, I have not met someone as nervous as you before."
There was a silence between us.
"So?" he prompted.
"So, what?" I asked, playing the stupid game.
"Will you go out with me?"
I looked away from him and down at the floor, thinking hard. I didn't know him and he just didn't "work" with me. We are hardly even friends and now he was asking me out? Additionally, he was too nervous and a very stressed out person.
"Erm," was my genius response.
"Listen, Al-Alice, think about it, will you? And when you are ready, just tell me, yea?"
"Sure," I said.
He grinned, "okay, see you later, Alice."
Jake walked away towards who-knows-where-the-hell the Hufflepuff common room is. Ugh, now I have some serious thinking to do and I still didn't finish that damn Charms essay that's due tomorrow. That stupid sentence!
Thunder roared in the distance and I looked up to see lightning ripping the sky apart. I thought about life and how things have been evolving. Then I thought about Remus.
But, like they say.
Curiosity killed the cat.
And satisfaction brought it back.
As you have all probably noticed, my chapters have changed a bit. four chapters have changed (have been combined) which you might tell because the chapter images haven't changed yet.
Well, as we say, everything will be done in due time.
I am very sorry for my late chapter submission it's just that between testing and projects, I haven't found any inspiration in between all of that.
But here it is.
Thank you for reading and reviewing! =)
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