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Chapter 20 : Chapter Nineteen: A Roaring Fire
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I gasped in awe from the entrance of the great hall. This freaking place never ceases to amaze me with its awesomeness. I mean, only Hogwarts would plant trees and make it look all “autumny.” I breathed in and looked at Hannah. She smirked at me teasingly before dragging me forcefully into the Autumn epicness . I laughed and immediately felt moved by the rhythm of the orchestral music. I loved music. Especially when it echoed in gigantic ass halls. It just makes it more awesome that I’m in a magical castle wearing a pretty dress.
Ellie and Hannah immediately broke off and started to sift through the crowd, their eyes trained on one particular sixth year Hufflepuff while Sarah grabbed came up to grab my other arm. We both surged through the crowd of students, craning our necks to look around at the general scenery.
There was no sign of Rose, Lily, or Malfoy for that matter and something in my gut feeling immediately told me that they were all probably off doing their own thing, or in the process of “fighting their own battles.” Whatever. At this point, it’s not my problem. I did all I could for that situation. And mind you, I did flatly tell Lily that she was a selfish bitch and then slapped Malfoy while telling him to grow a pair. I am such a damn good influence!!
Instead, I allowed myself to search the crowd for James. I knew that he would probably accompanied by Elisha, but I would try and keep my eye on him. I wanted him to be alone so that I could corner the prick and make him love me again. (Not in that sense...yet. Even though that would be pretty epic as well.)
As we all know, I am a leprechaun shorty so it was really hard to actually attempt to search for anyone through the massive crowd of people who were all significantly taller than me. Even when I was wearing heels I was still a little troll. Bah. What the fuck ever...I’ll just go get some punch and pretend it’s firewhiskey or something so that I can...
“Oi, look at Mister Mouth Eater over there with the superficial tramp.” Sarah motioned over my shoulder. I spun around to see only a mere few feet away from me was Albus sucking the face off of Ella Mirkwood. He had her pinned to a wall and I could see her hands snake through Al’s black hair. Oh shit man. They are totally into it.
Sarah and I exchanged half repulsed half amused looks.
“Ten galleons that he’ll get rid of her by the end of Christmas.” I stated with a smirk on my face.
“Alright. Ten galleons that he’ll dump her arse by summer.” She retaliated.
“Summer? You’re so going to lose this one.” I drawled, crossing my arms.
“You’re on then.” Sarah flipped her hair and laughed. I laughed along with her. We turned away from the kissing couple, but I just couldn’t resist it. I mean come on! This is Albus here! Practically my brother! And he was in a totally vulnerable position right now.
I whipped my wand out (from in between my bra...don’t ask) and pointed it at Al’s back. A shot of water spurted out and hit the couple with full force.
Both Sarah and I threw our heads back in laughter. Just as Al turned around, a furious expression plastered on his face, I grabbed Sarah’s arm and booked it.
“Elaquay!!” I heard his angry growl resonate from behind me, but I was still laughing, my arm hooked with Sarah’s, who was also shaking with laughter.
If Ella has a restraining order against me now, she’s probably going to file for me to go to Azkaban. But I’m not to worried. Albus may like her, but I know for a fact that he thinks I’m way more epic than she is.
After a few moments, I realized that I was congregating in a room full of slow dancing couples. Sarah and I exchanged awkward looks and I cleared my throat slightly. I moved a few steps to the left and ran into Sarah Corner and Elijah Evans swaying in a very disturbing way and playing tongue twister. I stumbled backwards mortified.
Sarah grabbed my arm and we managed to make our way to the corner where we made ourselves wallflowers.
I’m not a dancer to be honest. At the previous autumn balls, James and I never really slow danced much because we found it awkward. The one time we did attempt to do so, we ended up in a fit of giggles. (Well, they were louder than giggles.)
But then there was my party. I’ve never danced with him like that before. Even thinking about it now, the way his arms were gently holding me close to him, the way I laid my head on his chest, his scent, his heartbeat, his slow and steady breaths...it gives me goosebumps and makes my stomach flutter.
I felt a shudder pass through me and I let out a small breath.
Who the fuck am I kidding? There is no way I can NOT like James Sirius Potter. There is NO way I can live on without him in my life. And I’ll fix this. I really really will.
“Hello ladies. One of you care to dance?”
I looked up to see some tall gangly seventh year Ravenclaw with messy blonde hair smile at us. He looked pretty handsome, but I was to determined to fish James out from the crowd in order to accept his offer. I briefly noticed that Sarah blushed a bit as she agreed and took his hand.
The two dissapeared into the crowd of dancing couples and I was left all alone against the wall. Wow. That’s really sad. Ugh.
In order to avoid looking like a creeper, I pushed myself off of the wall and headed over to the punch table. I still kept my eyes trained on the crowd for any signs of James or Elisha, but I found none. A mixture of concern and relief flooded through me. As much as I didn’t want to see the two macking it up on the dance floor, my plan of actually confronting him about the past weeks would be flawed if he actually wasn’t here.
Oh fuck...what if the two were actually doing it? Oh no, oh no, oh no.
Elisha will get pregnant and the two will have awesome redheaded little girls with big brown eyes and little boys with dark messy hair and big blue eyes. The Weasley-Potter clan will forget all about me and James won’t even remember me in a few years time and when he comes across a picture of me...he’ll be like, “Who’s that?”
And Lily will be all like, “She was that chick who got drunk, snogged your wife and Rose’s husband all in the same night, and yelled shit about you. I forgot her name though.”
And Elisha will laugh, holding a hand over her newly pregnant stomach while James tossed the picture over her shoulder, laughing along with his beautiful wife.
Okay, a bit overdramatic, but I can’t help but let my mind run. I have an overactive imagination.
I scooped up some punch and attempted to put it in a cup, but for some reason...my hand slipped and the ladle dropped, spilling and spraying punch all over the table.
I gritted my teeth and let a string of profanities slip from my mouth.
“You really oughta control that tongue of yours.”
My head snapped up immediately at the voice. There, standing in front of me, helping herself to a cup of punch, was Elisha Garrett. She was wearing this beautiful slim emerald dress that hugged every curve of her body (in a very flattering way), and her red hair was pulled up into an elegant knot. Her eyes were narrow as they rested on me, but her face betrayed no hint of disgust or dislike. It was almost nonchalant.
Many thoughts went through my head at once. Why was she alone during a slow dance? Where was James? What the hell is going on?
So I just stared at her blankly. She was wearing heels. Not that she didn’t tower over me enough. Seriously.
“Um...” I attempted to say something intelligent, but my brain was already flooded with James.
They weren’t sleeping together! Be happy Elaquay!!!
“He went outside. I broke up with him about ten minutes ago.” She said, taking a sip of her punch. Her tone wasn’t strained, nor was it the characteristic Elisha sweetness that I’ve heard over the years.
Wait a minute...she broke up with him? She broke up with him?
“You...you broke up with him?” I knew that I sounded extremely unintelligent. But who the fuck cares right now? I’m shocked by the sudden turn of events.
She shrugged and shot me a frown, “Yes. So?”
“Why?” I demanded, clutching the edges of the punch table, my fingers digging into it. My heart was pounding against my chest and the sound of the music seemed to blur in and out through my head.
She gave another small frown as she sipped her punch. “It was just one of those things I felt I should do. Besides....”
Her blue eyes locked with mine. She pursed her lips slightly before answering, “I sense his fancy is elsewhere.”
I started to tremble at the news. James likes someone else? Seriously? I gritted my teeth and managed to squeak, “O-Oh?”
She nodded, looking a bit offended. “Yeah. So I reckoned that I would just let him go. He didn’t seem to upset about it, and to be frank, neither am I.”
I opened my mouth and tried to say something, but my mouth fell slack again.
“Yes, I did genuinely like him if that’s what you’re wondering, but I realized something about myself.” She tucked a stray red lock behind her ear and cleared her throat.
I just stared at her.
And...why is she telling me this?
“I know you probably won’t care about this, but James is an amazing bloke.” She stated before taking yet another sip.
Elaquay is confused. Very confused. I just kept staring at her.
If he was so amazing, why’d you break up with him?
“He helped me to see who I really am as a person. For so many years, I was one of those girls who tried to make everyone happy. I felt obligated to be so nice...when frankly, I don’t give a flying fuck.” She gave me a small tight grin.
“Um...good for you?” I said slowly, feeling extremely awkward. This is beyond weird.
She gave a small laugh. “Yes, quite swell. I also have to thank you for something.”
I rose an eyebrow. Me? What the hell could she possibly thank me for? I was nothing but a cruel bitch to her.
“And that might be....” I started crossing my arms and clenching my fists, my heart still pounding.
She broke up with him.
She gave a small laugh and responded with a slightly cynical tone, “This might sound rather odd, but despite popular belief, I wasn’t as drunk that night as everyone thought.”
A shock went through me. Is she talking about what I think she’s talking about?
“To be quite honest, that kiss that I had with you was probably the best I’ve had in my life.” She smirked at me slightly, her whole composure completely relaxed and nonchalant.
I opened my mouth and closed it, my throat dry. What the fuck is going on?
“O-Okay, You’re welcome I guess....” I stated, backing up slowly.
“Oh, sod off!” She scoffed at me. “I don’t fancy you or anything. You already have an inflated ego. I’m just saying that it made me realize that I well...I like girls.”
“Um...wow.” I stated with a nervous laugh. What was I supposed to say? Cheer her on? Give her sappy moral support for her new discovery about herself?
“Not just girls. I definitely like boys too. I guess...I’m sort of into people in general.” She shrugged again.
Again I repeat, she’s telling me this...why? Honestly, she and I aren’t necessarily buddy buddy. But alright I guess, I’ll just go with it.
“That’s...fantastic.” I started, feeling absolutely stupid. I wanted to tape my mouth shut and then throw myself in the black lake. This is just way to awkward for me. Now if this were Rose or Lily admitting something like this to me, it wouldn’t bother me, but this is Elisha Garrett who is confiding in me.
Elisha rolled her eyes and stated, “You’re the first person I’ve told, so you better feel special. Especially since I never planned on telling you in the first place. Funny how things turn out, eh?”
I nodded, not daring to open my mouth again. I grabbed some punch and started chugging it.
“Besides that, James definitely fancies someone else.” She gave a small sigh and continued, “Shame. He really is amazing, but I can’t just keep him at my side if he doesn’t like me. I’d feel extremely guilty, especially since he’s to soft to break up with me.”
I kept chugging my drink. But my insides were starting to fire up once again. I felt a burning hatred for this mystery girl that James happened to like. I knew that I shouldn’t let myself resort to such low levels, but it’s just in my nature to act like this.
Finally, I slammed my cup down, wishing desperately that I felt the sting of firewhiskey against my throat. Nothing. No sting, no satisfaction....this is awful.
“Who is it?” I asked angrily, clenching my fists.
I honestly don’t mean to overreact like this, but I just do. I guess I’m just a jealous bitch in general.
Elisha’s lips turned up slightly before she shook her head and answered, “You’ll have to ask him. It’s not really my place to answer....but before you go interrogating the poor tosser, I suggest that you two make up and at least regain some sort of level of civility.”
She’s right. If I went to find James right now and started to go all batshit at him, he’d get all pissed and then the castle would be completely demolished. Plus, the idea of James and I together as friends again made my heart ache with yearning. I miss him. A lot. I miss our jokes, our schemes, our laughter, our memories....I may have everyone else back, but it’s his forgiveness that I yearn for the most.
“Well, I did mention that he walked outside.” Elisha remarked.
I dropped my drink and ran as fast as I could toward the exit of the hall, ignoring the fact that my stubby leprechaun legs weren’t for extreme extraneous speed.
~10-15 Minutes Earlier, (James’ POV)~
I honestly didn’t want to go to this blasted ball tonight. But I couldn’t just be a prat and ditch on Elisha. She did spend three hundred galleons on that bloody dress of hers.
And mum did send me some dress robes. Mind you, she’d go mad if I didn’t wear them at least once this year, so I decided that this was the only time I’d ever put them on.
So here I was, holding my girlfriend’s hand in the middle of a decorated great hall. As per usual, the place looked amazing, but I just couldn’t find anything particularly special about it. There were two things on my mind.
One of them was sleeping. I haven’t slept well in ages and I really wanted to just collapse on my bed and not be bothered.
The second was Elaquay bloody Smithson, that little pint sized twat that I’ve been thinking about to an extent that would be considered quite unhealthy.
This is ridiculous. How can I just suddenly fancy her? It doesn’t make sense. She’s been my best mate since I was twelve!
I haven’t told anyone about this. Who could I tell? Al? Fuck no. Lily? Even worse. Rose? Eh....maybe.
I can’t deal with this, and I shouldn’t be dealing with this sort of rubbish, especially when I’m holding hands with another girl...a beautiful girl that happens to be my girlfriend. Plus, Elaquay is just...Elaquay. If you told me a year ago that I would fancy her soon, I would laugh. Honestly.
I could never even fathom the idea of Elaquay as someone who I’d even snog! Yet, here I am, wishing that I could just grab her and snog her senseless.
I mean, she isn’t a troll or anything. She’s quite attractive to be honest...but once you know the fact that she snores when she’s drunk, is an arrogant bitch when she’s PMSing, still brags about the fact that she won a burping contest against Al and I three years ago, is usually unbearably irritating, and is the most ungraceful and uncoordinated person in the goddamn world...it makes it sort of hard to want to snog her.
I just know her to well. I know her embarassing faults and I know the unattractive side.
Let me tell you, it’s pretty damn unattractive.
“James, are you even listening to me?”
“Huh?” I shook my head slightly and realized that Elisha was glaring at me. Bloody hell, she’s beautiful. I smiled at her, but she was still glaring. Bollocks....what did I do now?
“I said that we should go dance.” She repeated, looking rather impatient.
“Erm...Alr-oh bloody hell.”
A few meters away from me was Al. He had Ella Mirkwood pinned against a wall as he snogged her senseless. The sight was cringe-worthy....and completely prone to opportunity.
I couldn’t help it. I put my hand into my robe pocket and drew my wand, but before I could even think about what I could do to shame my lil’ bro, a huge jet of water came blasting right at them, dousing the couple from head to toe.
My mouth dropped open and I heard ringing laughter off to the left. I turned my head to see none other than Elaquay Smithson with her blonde friend. She had her wand outstretched and she was doubling over in giggles.
I felt my stomach flutter. It literally fluttered. How bloody embarassing is that? I was breathless as I looked at her. My ears were filled with a mixture of my speeding heartbeat and her laughter.
What can I say? She looked bloody gorgeous. So gorgeous that it wasn’t fair. And it wasn’t just the fact that she was dressed up that made her look so amazing. It was her smile. It was a smile that I used to see everyday. A smile that I never even thought twice about.
Her cheeks were slightly pink, her silvery eyes were twinkling, and she had these adorable dimples that made me just want to go over there and fucking pin her to the wall and snog her.
I always found her laughter bloody irritating. It still is. And I loved it. I love her so much it’s not even funny.
And I’m pathetic.
Plus, the way she looked in that dress completely was like a smack to the face. My jaw dropped to the floor.
As Al turned around and bellowed Elaquay’s name in anger, I watched as the small American leprechaun turned on her heel, grabbing her friend’s arm and dissapeared into the crowd, her red curls bouncing.
Bloody hell, this is absolutely unacceptable.
“I get it.”
Elisha’s voice broke through my thoughts. Fuck. I forgot that she was here and that she is my girlfriend and that Elaquay still isn’t talking to me.
I turned to look at her and saw that she was staring curiously at me. She had a grim smile on her mouth as she gave a sigh.
“You’re in love with her.”
“I knew it.”
“James, just shut up.”
I closed my mouth as Elisha held her hand up. She gave another sigh and shook her head. To my relief, she didn’t seem angry. But her expression still frightened me.
She looked merely curious.
I had a clear idea of what I was expecting, and it definitely wasn’t this.
“How much?” She asked in a soft voice.
“What...” I started, confused and overwhelmed. I knew that I was probably blushing right now, which is fucking embarassing.
“How much do you love her?” She asked. Her blue eyes were piercing into me and I tried to avoid them, but I couldn’t. So I stared right back at and answered her.
“With all my bloody heart.”
Yes, the words came out of my mouth without me even thinking about it. Two cheesy feminine cliches in the span of twenty four hours. I’m starting to feel a bit concerned for my health.
This is all Elaquay’s fault. I blame her.
Elisha just stared back at me for a few more seconds before she placed a hand on my cheek and gently placed her soft lips on mine. I closed my eyes and breathed in her scent. She smelt like roses. It was a nice scent, but it wasn’t as good as...oh fucking hell.
Ginger and lemon sage mixed with freshly fallen rain.
The scent that always filled the room when she was around, the scent that sent a warm feeling in my stomach, the scent that made me feel at home...
The scent I smelled in fucking sixth year potions class when I got a whiff of that damn amortentia.
Why didn’t I realize it before? I am so bloody stupid.
I broke the soft kiss and looked at the girl in front of me. Elisha Garrett is absolutely beautiful. She really is.
“To save you the pain James, I’m breaking up with you.” She announced softly, removing her hand from my cheek.
I gaped at her. I didn’t know what to feel at this. I definitely didn’t feel joy. No bloke likes being broken up with, but I wasn’t torn up either. I guess it was just one of those inevitable things in life. I don’t fucking know.
“I’ll be fine. Just do what you have to do.” She said with a small smile. Before I could make another sound, she turned on her heel and dissapeared through the crowd.
That’s when I left. I have to just...think by myself for a while.
~ Present Time (Elaquay’s POV) ~
Okay, I had to stop. I can only run for so long before I die inside. It really all depends to be honest. When I’m pissed as hell, I can run for fucking ever. But normally, it takes a lot of effort for me to run even across the hall. I know that it doesn’t make sense, but just go with it.
At least I made it outside.
I dragged myself forward, breathing in and out, my breath ragged and coming out in little small poofs of mist that dissapeared subtly against the stunning night sky.
It really is beautiful tonight.
The sky is a purply color dotted with bright points of light. The air was cool, but not freezing. The breeze did make me shudder a little bit though.
I walked in silence, my heart pumping against my chest.
To my surprise, little golden orbs of light were floating and flying everywhere. One of them passed a few inches before my eyes and I realized that they were fairies. I frowned slightly.
Fairies and I never got along well. There was this one time in third year...um...anyway, long story.
But I didn’t deny that the golden orbs of light that dotted the grounds and flew up in the air provided an absolutely stunning visual. They gave off small twinkling sounds that contrasted peacefully with the steady chirp of the crickets. I always loved the crickets. They never stopped croaking until about December before they started up again in March.
I kept walking forward until I could see the shoreline of the black lake, which reflected the light of the stars.
My heart stopped as I saw a tall figure stand there. His back was to me, and I could see that he had a mass of messy dark hair. Chills ran down my spine and my breath hitched.
James Sirius Potter.
I reached into my bra (please don’t ask) and withdrew the necklace. I clutched it in my hand, took a deep breath, and made my way toward him.
This had to be done.
Because I fucking miss him.
My whole body was a whirling storm of chaos as I stood next to him. I stared forward at the lake, feeling his presence right next to me, mere inches away. It was just me and him, staring out at the lake as the fairy orbs glittered and floated over the water.
I took a deep breath and let it out.
I forgot how tall he is. I forgot how his scent could overpower me and completely drive me insane.
This is like a bulldozer. It’s just so much.
“Remember the time when you used your beater’s bat to smash a fairy’s nest and they all attacked you?” He asked softly. His voice had a grin hidden in it. My heart soared.
I turned my whole body toward him and stared up at his side profile, just waiting. I can’t say anything now. I just can’t.
Finally, he turned to face me, his mouth slightly parted and his eyes shimmering.
I bit my lip and held out my hand. I uncurled it to reveal the shining necklace, the burrow emblem glittering under the glow of the starlight.
I watched as he stared down at it, his eyes literally glowing. My heart beat sped up and I felt my limbs start to tremble. His scent washed over me like crashing waves and I felt the tears burn my eyes.
I miss him so much.
He finally averted his eyes from the necklace and looked back at me. He had a small smile playing on his lips.
And I knew I had him back.
I grinned at him and curled my hand around the necklace before lowering it. We both turned back to look at the lake.
After about ten seconds of silence, James spoke again, but he sounded rather nervous.
“Erm...did you h-happen to hear anything at night? At the hospital?”
Um...what the fuck? What is he talking about? I stared at him and rose an eyebrow. He was looking at his feet as he ran a hand through his messy hair nervously. He is sooo adorable that
it’s not even legal.
“No, what are you talking about?” I asked, frowning.
He looked slightly crestfallen, yet relieved at the same time. He let out a long breath and answered, “I....nothing. It’s nothing.”
His voice was strained and exhausted. He avoided my eyes.
Now I am damn curious. He can’t just bring something up like this and then just drop it. That’s not fucking right.
“Tell me! What happened?” I demanded, staring at him intently.
James just shook his head and answered, “Seriously, Els. It’s nothing. Honestly.”
“I fucking swear....”
“Just drop it. Okay?” He asked in a desperate voice. His eyes locked with mine and he held it there. My whole body was on fire.
And I can’t resist those eyes.
I nodded slightly before answering, “Fine.”
He looked immensely relieved, but I couldn’t help it. I had to keep interrogating him.
“So...who is she?” I asked. I tried to keep my tone cool.
“What?” James looked puzzled as he turned to look back at me, his brow furrowed.
“Elisha told me that she broke up with you because you like another girl. Who is it?” I asked, crossing my arms and trying to keep my temper in check. I don’t want to blow up on him. I really don’t.
James looked absolutely bewildered, “What are you...”
“Just spit it out James. We all know that she needs my stamp of approval before you can start dating the bitch.” I said, realizing that my voice was laced with bitterness. Oh shit. I am such a fucking obsessive freak. What is wrong with me?
To my surprise, he looked amused. He burst out into laughter and then asked with a crooked smile on his face, “You honestly don’t know who it is?”
I was taken aback, and I felt my cheeks grow hot. Stupid prick.
“Wh---No! I haven’t been talking to you for the last three fucking weeks! How would I know who you like now? Who is it?” I demanded again. Why can’t I control myself?
But James didn’t look irritated at all. He was still giving me this amused look, his smile all crooked.
Finally, he just shook his head and then wrapped his arms around me.
Now that shut me up.
He held me close to him and I melted. I felt weak at the knees. And the tears spilled down my cheeks...probably ruining all of the makeup that the girls worked so hard on.
I am crying again.
He just held me for the longest time.
“You’re fucking impossible Els.” He muttered, his tone full of sarcasm, yet I could tell that he was grinning.
I can’t believe how in love I am with him. Holy hell.
He finally let go of me and looked down at me. He lifted a finger to my cheek and gently wiped a tear. He smirked and said, “Who’s the culprit this time? Not Lily right?”
I hastily wiped my tears away, and realized that my hands were all smudged with black. Stupid mascara. I am never wearing makeup. Ever.
I groaned and shook my head. “Not Lily.”
He gave a small laugh before grabbing my arm and gently pulling me back towards the castle.
Once my shaky sobs resided, I started to question him again.
“Who is it? Seriously, James. I want to know!”
He just laughed and shook his head.
Yes, I kept questioning him. Over and over and over again. First about what he was talking about in the hospital, second about who he’s crushing on now. But he wouldn’t fucking answer me! It was pissing me off! Don’t get me wrong, I’m glad that he and I made up and all, but he can’t just leave me hanging. I won’t be able to get one second’s worth of rest with James just laughing off my questions as if the answer were the most obvious thing in the world.
By the time we reached the great hall, the dancing had shifted from the lovely little orchestra of serenading Baroque/Renaissance styled shit to...well...dubstep. I know, dubstep. At a wizarding school. That can be looked at as either completely epic or completely pathetic. I don’t know how I look at it. It just depends on my mood I guess. Right now, the dubstep seemed absolutely awesome.
“Who is it?” I shouted over the music.
“What?” He shouted back.
“Who the hell is it? Who do you like?” I demanded.
He grinned down at me before turning his back on me and heading toward the punch bowl. What the fuck? Honestly? He can’t just do that to me! Stupid annoying dick.
I gritted my teeth and stomped after him, forgetting that I was wearing heels. I completely tripped and fell forward onto my face. Now that I think about it, it’s honestly a miracle that I hadn’t tripped already tonight, especially with me running and all...oh wait...never mind. I did trip. Several times. I know that I’ll have bruises tomorrow.
I heard a burst of laughter and I lifted my head to see that James was having the time of his life, laughing his ass off at the poor short girl who can’t walk in heels for shit. Or in general really.
Remind me why I like him again?
I glared up at him and felt my cheeks grow hot. I stood up and proceeded to yank my heels off. Without another thought, I threw them in the direction of a grinding couple. I didn’t see their faces, but I saw them yelp and jump apart. I started to laugh hysterically.
I’m such a hopeless romantic that I’m literally shitting hearts and roses.
Then I realized that the couple was Albus and Ella. Oh shit.
Al was now glaring at me fully. I backed up slightly as he marched toward me. James grabbed my arm and we both booked it. Once we were sure that we made it out of sight, he laughed at me...again.
“Do you just find pleasure in my pain or something?” I asked.
“Yes. You’re rather amusing, Miss Smithson.” He responded with a smirk.
Then, we just stared at each other. Something passed between the two of us, and my heart started to drum against my chest again. Why is he staring at me like that? WHY IS HE STARING AT ME LIKE THAT?
Oh shit, hyperventilation mode. In and out. In and out. His eyes are glittering, shining....
I looked down.
I finally just let it all spill out. What I’ve been meaning to say for a while.
“I’m sorry James. For everything. I know I was a fucking bitch to you and Elisha, and then I had to get completely fucked and do some crazy shit that is completely unforgivable....” I started rambling, looking at my feet and twisting my fingers. Plus, my throat hurt with the strain of actually having to shout over the music. So it was painful and rather awkward.
“I-I don’t actually remember any of it, but judging by the fact that I was the most hated person in the school for a while, I guess it was pretty awful. Al said that I said some pretty bad shit to you and I hope you know that I didn’t mean any of it...in fact I don’t even know what it was....” I was cut off.
“You called me a coward. You told me that there is no way I can ever be compared to my dad. You also mentioned that I was pathetic and that Lily should go throw herself off of the astronomy tower...” His voice was flat and cold. He avoided eye contact with me and I sincerely wished that I hadn’t brought it up. What if he hasn’t forgiven me? What if our friendship can never be the same again?
And did I really say that? I knew that an attack on his dignity was the worst damage you could do to James Potter. And guess what? I did just that. I’m such classy drunk it’s not even funny. Not to mention that I probably screamed all of this at him while I was half naked, slurring my words, and completely covered in sweat and other shit.
I can’t believe I said that to him.
My eyes burned. He looked at me, and his eyes were glowing again.
I can’t do this. It’s not the same.
I backed up slowly, before turning on my heel and pushing my way through the crowd and running for my life out of the hall. I turned into a dark and deserted corridor and stopped, pushing my fists against the wall and breathing in and out.
I am such a horrible person. Why am I so self-destructive? Why can’t I have any self control? I bit my lip and gritted my teeth, closing my eyes. I was all alone in this dark corridor where no one could reach me...
Okay, whatever. Shut up. I was reveling in my awesome poetic/dramatic moment.
I didn’t turn around.
I felt him right behind me. He didn’t make a movement to reach out and touch me. I was greatful for that. I think that I’d break down, lose it, kiss the shit out of him, and then die. Trust me. It will happen in that exact order and it wouldn’t be pretty. In fact, it would be pretty pathetic.
But he was there behind me. I could feel physical presence vibrating against my back. It was a strange feeling. It tickled my neck and sent chills up my spine.
Why can’t life be easy? Why can’t I just...NOT BE IN LOVE WITH MY BEST FRIEND?
Why can’t I just go back to liking Derrick Finnigan? He actually liked me and he was a good kisser...
But no. I’m head over heels for my best friend, who happens to see me as nothing more than his sister...and now possibly as just an acquaintance.
I’m so self-destructive. There’s seriously something wrong with me.
“Elaquay, look at me.” He said with a soft voice that caused butterflies to erupt in my stomach. No, not butterflies. These were mutated hammering boulders. And they were having a fucking fiesta.
I clenched my fists.
“Look at me.”
So I spun around and looked up at him. He towered over me and his scent was vibrating through the air. I felt my knees literally buckle. Holy shit.
His gaze was intense, yet tender. His eyes bore into mine.
I kept my back against the wall.
And he came closer.
He rested both hands on either side of my head against the wall so that I was trapped. He gave a small smile and responded in a whisper,
I didn’t know what to feel. He was to damn close. So SOOO damn close. I breathed in and breathed out.
I was shaking, but I stayed still, staring up at him wordlessly.
Then...his hand gently left the wall and migrated to my cheek. He let his fingertips gently graze my cheek and then down along my jawbone.
Holy motherfucking shit. Is this really happening right now?
His eyes were on fire.
And I was absolutely still.
And there was a fire.
A roaring fire.
I could feel it consume me whole, cascading through my whole body and sweltering hot against my skin.
My heart was drumming violently against my chest.
His eyes were on my lips and I decided to repeat the usual habit of biting my bottom lip out of nervousness.
“Shit.” He muttered, his the brown color of his eyes glowing furiously.
The next thing I knew, his lips were on mine.
Holy motherfucking sweet egg shells. How can I describe it?
Kissing James Sirius Potter was out of this world. OUT OF THIS WORLD!!!
His lips moved against mine and I responded whole heartedly, my whole body on fucking fire. My legs were jelly and my head was spinning; there were chills spilling down my spine, mixing with a strange sensation of crackling heat.
His hands were on my hips and I opened my mouth under the kiss. I let out a gasp as his tongue slid into mine and he gave this sexy groan that completely just smacked any self control I had within me with a huge big ass sludge hammer.
I grasped onto him, and he broke the kiss for a second to grab me by the hips and completely lift me up so that I was level with his face. He pinned me roughly against the wall and I wrapped my legs around him, my dress sliding up my thighs. I couldn’t stop. I gasped, shuddered, and kept moving my lips against his. He grazed his fingers against my bare thighs as the dress traveled higher and higher.
We were just getting fucking aggressive now. And it was the best damn fucking thing ever.
Suddenly, he bit my lip and I tangled my fingers in his messy dark hair, reveling in how soft it was. I moaned against his lips, which had attacked mine fully once again.
This kid is going to kill me. Kissing Derrick is nothing...I repeat...NOTHING compared to this. This is like heaven. I seriously think I just died and went to heaven.
Then, he broke the kiss.
He rested his forehead against mine for a second before muttering, “Fuck.”
He gently let me down and backed away. His hair was a messier than it usually was, his cheeks were pink, and his lips were swollen.
He looked at me, his eyes a completely steamy mess of swirling warm brown.
I touched my lips lightly. Then it all came crashing down.
I had just made out with James Sirius Potter.
“Fuck,” He repeated.
He backed up a little bit more.
I could still taste him against my lips. That fresh warm intoxicating taste. His scent was everywhere, and I knew that I smelt of it.
He ran a hand through his hair and I had the urge to go over there and kiss him again. But I knew, judging by the mortified expression on James’s face, it probably won’t happen.
You just made out James Sirius Potter, bitch!
So I did the only thing my body could comprehend at the moment, despite my swirling vision, the echoing feel of his fingers against my bare skin, his lips on mine...
I booked it.
A/N: Oh......OHHHHH...... I said that there would be some oompf. I was originally not going to have them kiss until four chapters later, but I don't think y'all need to suffer anymore. Plus, this is was the perfect opportunity. And....AHHHHHH! Tell me what you think!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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