I have a confession to make.
I actually like Moaning Myrtle.
I know I’m supposed to hate her. Everyone at Hogwarts hates her. But she’s really not that bad once you get to know her. She’s nice to talk to, and she’s good about being there for you if you’re nice to her. Plus, she puts things into perspective for you pretty well, since she’s dead. Whatever your problems are, they can never really be worse than hers. You’re still living.
Myrtle and I struck up a friendship during my second year when I got my period for the first time, and we’ve been friends ever since.
“I just don’t know what to do anymore. I care about both of them, but neither one of them seems to care about me anymore.”
Myrtle pursed her lips. She may not have had much experience with boys in life, but she’s been around long enough to have observed quite a few Hogwarts romances. “Lorcan didn’t say that. He said he was leaving because he cared.”
I scowled. “How does that help? He’s left me too.”
“If Anders wasn’t dating that Quidditch girl, do you think you could date him?”
“Old Anders, yes.” I said quickly, without a doubt. Fine, I’ll admit it. I had a bit of a crush on the old Anders. It’s a little late now though, isn’t it? He has a girlfriend and he’s not the boy that I fell in love with. “New Anders, no.” I rubbed my forehead. “I never thought I could take a relationship with Lorcan seriously. He’s not the boyfriend type. But… I miss him, Myrtle.”
It had been two days since the shit had hit the fan, and Lorcan was still avoiding me like I had dragonpox. How the hell had I lost both of my best friends in just a matter of months? I hadn’t even done anything! They were the ones taking off.
I’m really starting to wish I was a lesbian. I understand girls. My life would be so much easier if I only had to deal with people the same gender as me. People who spoke my language, not like the bloody Scamander twins.
“Anders is rather fit.” Myrtle said with a giggle. Its times like this that I’m reminded that no matter how wise Myrtle might seem at times, she is still essentially a teenage girl. “I have always liked him. He doesn’t get too upset when I pop in the prefect’s bathroom.”
“Myrtle, love, please don’t creep on my… my… Don’t creep on Anders, okay?”
She pouted. “I can’t promise anything. Have you seen him?”
Back in my room, I scowled at one of the pictures I had up in my room. It had always been one of my favourites, taken in third year on my birthday. It had been a perfect day. God, I missed those times. Everything had been so easy then. We had all been best friends, plain and simple. Hormones had ruined everything.
We had been in History of Magic. Not during the picture, of course. Binnes was oblivious, but he probably would have noticed my flash going off. Anyways, the day had started off with History of Magic. Anders had entertained himself with magical origami. Yes, the boy is a jock, but he’s always had a weird interest in folding bits of parchment. Sometimes I find old paper cranes or frogs in my trunk that he made for me. He had gone all out that day, and made an army of paper creatures in all sorts of colours. I remembered the olive green frog that had hopped across my desk, and made soft ribbits, the black cat, the white dove, and my personal favourite, the tawny hippogriff that had tossed its head about as if it was real. Anders had a gift when it came to those sort of Charms. Creature after creature had paraded across my desk, until finally, Anders had enchanted an origami owl to deliver me a miniature note that had ordered me to go to the lake before dinner.
The boy knew how to be charming.
When I had arrived at the lake, Anders, Lorcan, Lily, Dom, Hugo, and even Al and James had been waiting for me with a picnic dinner. Yet another occasion when I was incredibly jealous of Lily for having the greatest brothers. They hadn’t stayed for long, but really, how many big brothers stop in to wish their little sister’s friend happy birthday?
My life would be so much easier right now if I had fallen in love with one of the Potter boys.
I had one of those bloody paper animals on my end table. Why hadn’t I gotten rid of them ages ago, back when Anders had first started being distant? I reached out to crumple it, but paused. I didn’t have the heart to.
I closed my eyes as I sank down onto my bed. Anders hadn’t always been like this. I remembered fourth year, the night that I had accidentally drunken spiked pumpkin juice. I had been an idiot that night, and thought it was just a special variety of the beverage. I think I’d had maybe three large glasses of it before I realized the truth.
“Eva, how many parties have you been to? Special pumpkin juice?” Lorcan had asked me, while laughing his head off.
“Leave her alone, Lor.” I had camped out in the boys’ room that night. Anders had taken care of me, holding my hair back while I hurled up the contents of my stomach, and murmuring comforting words. “Eva didn’t know better. You’re really not helping. Can you be useful for once and get her a washcloth?”
These were the reasons I had fallen half in love with Anders. These were the reasons I had been his friend for so long. He was a sweetheart, and I had known him like the back of my hand. He helped me with my homework, and I cheered him on in every match. He had always made sure I got all my favourite things at meal times, given me a cat, and had never made fun of my love for comic books. Anders had always known just what I needed. We had an unspoken language between the two of us, a secret understanding.
I had grown to ignore the dull ache that had been paining my heart for months, the feeling of loneliness and abandonment. It had all come back painfully now that I had been abandoned by both the brothers. When was the last time that Anders’ hazel eyes had brightened at the sight of me, that I had made his mouth turn up in one of his signature grins?
I needed him.
“We need to talk.”
I eyed my brother worriedly. The last time we had tried to talk… Well, to say it hadn’t gone well was the understatement of the century. I had been avoiding Lorcan at all costs ever since. I really preferred living. “We’re in class.” Every class I had with him I had been arriving to just before it began. The more people around, the less likely he was to murder me.
Besides, we were in Charms, which is easily my favourite class.
“It’s about Eva.” Lorcan continued.
It hadn’t taken long for the story to spread about how the two of them had broken up. News travels fast when you stuff hundreds of teenagers together in a castle. I had been thrilled. That made me a terrible person, didn’t it? I had a girlfriend, and Eva… Well, she probably hated me. I couldn’t blame her. But she had been Lorcan’s! I knew my brother well enough to realize that he wasn’t just infatuated with her like he was with all the other girls he had been with. He loved her.
Which had made it even more surprising to me when they had split. Eva must have been the one to do the dumping, since Lorcan would never break up with her.
“I broke up with her.”
Shit, there goes my theory. “I’m sorry to hear that, mate. Weren’t you happy?” I had seen them together at mealtimes. She had always had a huge grin on her face when she was with him. He liked her, and she liked him. And it had killed me a little to see Eva kissing someone who looked just like me, but wasn’t me.
I am the worst boyfriend. Boyfriends aren’t supposed to have feelings for other girls, especially not their twin brother’s now ex.
He shrugged. “We were happy. But she’s in love with you.”
“What?” I hissed, whipping around to look at him, accidentally causing my quill to go flying across the room. Apparently it’s not good to get emotional when you’ve got your quill charmed to take notes for you.
A few people around us turned to stare. Eva had moved to a seat on the opposite side of the room, after claiming that she couldn’t see the board from her old seat. We had been sitting in the same seats since second year now, but Professor Finnegan hadn’t questioned it. He tried to avoid getting involved in our personal lives as much as possible.
“Mr. Scamander.” Finnegan cleared his throat. “You’re not normally the one to be unable to control himself.” I had heard more than a few stories about Finnegan’s magical mishaps in school from the Weasleys. He had clearly undergone some transformation since then, since he was pretty brilliant at the subject. Finnegan returned my wand to me, shaking his head slightly.
I caught Eva looking in my direction. The last time she’s looked at me during class was a week ago. It’s all because of Finnegan. I’m not oblivious to the fact that all the girls think he’s the best looking teacher at this school, Eva included.
“Sorry Professor.” I mumbled, looking down at my lap. Thank god Finnegan likes me. Being a good student basically gives you a free pass when it comes to teachers. They just brush off any accident you have as a temporary fit of insanity.
Lorcan wasn’t going to give up this easily. “Did you hear what I said?”
“I heard you.” Why else would I have thrown my quill across the room? Target practice? “I’m just… Lor, I was so sure that she was in love with you.”
He was silent for a moment. Nice, Anders. Clearly not the right choice of words. Lorcan wanted Eva to be in love with him. Who wouldn’t?
Hey, Anders? Remember Helene? Blonde hair, blue eyes, your girlfriend? If she could read my mind I would be dead right now.
“Yeah, well, she’s not. She wants you, and… I want her to be happy. So I think it’s about time for you to dump your girlfriend and snog Eva already.” Lorcan muttered. “Get your head out of your ass so you can finally realize that you’re in love with her.”
Lorcan has always been about as eloquent as Lily. “You’re sure?” I can’t hurt Helene for no reason. I mean, I shouldn’t hurt her at all. She’s a great girl, she really is.
She’s just… Well, she’s not Eva, you know?
Lorcan looked like he was about to hit me. “How dense can you be? You haven’t picked up on that by now? She’s been destroyed by you ignoring her. She ran away from the sight of you and Praxis so fast you would have thought there was a dragon after her.” He ran a hand through his hair. “Nothing I do can change the fact that she wants to jump you.”
“She really wants to jump me?”
“Do you have a death wish?”
What did you guys think? Did you enjoy that little glimpse into Anders' mind? Chapter 30 is told entirely from his point of view, although obviously you guys have to wait another 10 chapters for that. It scares me to even say Chapter 30, even though I'm writing Chapter 33 right now. White Blank Page will probably end up being between 40 and 45 chapters long! I promise you guys that Eva will make a decision soon! She can't string the twins along forever. All your reviews brighten my day, so leave me some feedback!