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Chapter 1 : You Were Mine First
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Scorpius Malfoy. My best friend. The one I knew I could tell anything to and he wouldn’t tell a soul. We had been best friends since we were five. He was always there to pick me up when I fell and to wipe away my tears.
I know what you, the reader, are probably thinking right now. “Oh Rose, not another poor me speech!” Let me tell you though, this is my time to vent, so don’t interrupt me!
Now back to the “poor me” speech. Scorpius and I would go everywhere together. He would play Barbie’s with me, and I would play cowboys and Indians with him. On New Year’s Eve we would lie in my bed and count the stars through my skylight. He would continually point out the constellation he was named for.
We were inseparable. When groups were necessary in school we would look at each other and nod our heads in agreement that we would be together. Our birthday parties were combined because they were so close. He had always had a small crush on me ever since we were little kids. I never thought twice of him. He was always like a brother to me. He would attempt a myriad of things to get me to notice him. He even learned how to play French horn because he knew how much I loved the instrument. I didn’t give him any thought though. Nothing changed.
He would hold my hand tightly when I was scared or feeling alone. He knew we better than my parents and brother.
At Hogwarts, he was sorted into Slytherin, while I was put in Ravenclaw. I had given him and encouraging smile across the hall when he had a gotten a bad grade on a test or things just weren’t working out properly. Even though we were in separate houses, we would still constantly be together. People would say, “Did you hear how Rose and Scorpius flooded the third floor corridor?” or “Weasley and Malfoy helped sack Professor Nett.” Our names were always placed together. We were two peas in a pod until Christmas vacation of fifth year.
Scorpius and I were lying on my parent’s bed going through old photo albums. We had been so little. Scorpius had rolled over onto his back as I continued to lie on my stomach and flip through pages of pictures.
Scorpius had looked over at me and shot me a huge grin. I raised my eyebrows at him as if waiting for an explanation to his sudden turn of attitude.
“I have something to tell you,” he had said quietly. I had continued to keep my eyebrows raised until he said, “I have a girlfriend now! Isn’t it great?!” At that exact moment, my heart had broken in two. I never understood why people would make such a big deal out of a broken heart. But right then, I understood. It was the most excruciating pain I had ever felt in my entire life. I put on a brave face, smiled and told him I was happy for him. I thought for sure that the crack that erupted down my heart was so loud that Scorpius would hear it. I had been broken up inside. Listening to Scorpius go on and on about how perfect this new girl was, was torture.
I felt like I would burst into tears then. I held on for a little longer as I excused myself from the room and ran to my own as the tears started to flood down my face.
My mother had come in and saw me curled up on my bed hugging my pillow. She had sat on the side and rubbed my back and stroked my hair. She knew how I felt. She told me that she and dad had gone through the same thing. She said it felt as if someone stabbed her through her heart. She told me everything would be all right, but I there was no way I would believe something like that.
I would cry myself to sleep at night. Usually people would say not to pine over something like that, but if you truly loved someone so much and didn’t realize it until he/she wasn’t in your grasp anymore, the pain would last a long time.
This is a kid I had known for ten years and he had chosen someone else over me. It hurt. If he could only hear me. Hear what I was saying, he’d understand. I didn’t know who he was anymore. My mother had sworn that we were going to end up married someday. She was wrong.
Since the new girlfriend showed up, I lost the person who meant the most to me. Everything revolved around her. “Oh, sorry Rose, I can’t. Taryn and I are going to Madame Puddifoot’s today,” was his constant excuse.
After that, I gave up. I never asked him to come and do something with me. He had forgotten all about us. I was a wreck without him.
I was constantly going over the all possibilities of what I could’ve done differently in any of our conversations. “I could’ve kissed him then,” and “I could have given him a better hug,” were a couple of the things I was constantly beating myself up for.
One day I woke up and looked in the mirror. I hardly recognized myself. I had bags under my eyes and it was as if I had a permanent frown sewn onto my face.
I knew from then on, I had to make a change. I had to accept what was happening no matter how much it tore me up inside. I hid my jealousy so well. Scorpius had started to talk to me more. He had come to Christmas, but was still with her. Scorpius Malfoy had broken my heart. It would never be mended. I would always have the feeling of abandonment and hurt inside of me. It was a permanent thing I would deal with for the rest of my life.
A/N: Hey guys, so I know this is short, but it kind of means a lot, to me anyway. This is exactly what I have been going through except the characters are different obviously:) So, I've been keeping all these feelings locked up for a while and it just felt so good to vent everything onto paper. So please review and tell me what you think:)
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