Chapter 1 : Confessions
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And so I am loosing it. Totally and completely falling off my rocker.
Must focus on something else, She thought desperately. Okay, got it. Focus on Merlin and his Great Beard. But before she could start to direct her track of mind towards Merlin's most saggy Y-front, Ron decided to walk in and interrupt her interesting, amazing, and, let's face it, down-right traumatizing thoughts.
"Oh, hey Hermione," Ron said in a gloomy voice.
"Wow," Hermione started sarcastically, "Glad to see your happy to see me."
He groaned a little and said. "Urgh, too... exhausted... to... say... hi."
"Worst excuse I have ever heard in my life," Hermione stated plainly.
"Fine, this a better greeting??" He asked.
Hermione had her mouth open a little, about to ask him where her improved welcoming was, but Ron grabbed her waist and pulled her into an amazing kiss. Haha, this is why I love him. She thought happily as her mind was pulled away with Ron's surprising little present.
Finally they pulled away, leaving Hermione blushing and Ron breathless. "Now I actually feel like you somewhat care about seeing me," Hermione said in a tone that was obviously trying to be fed up, but was failing miserably.
"Well, of course I care about seeing you," Ron began, and Hermione immediately began to think he was going to say one of those Aww that's sweet, things, but instead he had to add, "You're the only one who supplies me with food."
"Ah, the one thing you care about," Hermione said in a ticked off tone. "Food."
"You know that's not true," He said with a smile that read I-Didn't-Really-Mean-It-Now-Get-Over-It-You-Big-Baby. Speaking of babies...
"Ron I have to tell you something," Hermione blurted out.
"Shoot," Ron said carelessly, grabbing an apple and taking a loud bite.
"I may be a little pregnant," Hermione shot out without thinking. Smooth, Hermione, real smooth, She thought.
Ron looked a bit confused, so Hermione clarified, "No, that came out wrong, I am definitely pregnant."
"That's good!" Ron exclaimed. "And explains so much, I mean I thought it was just your time of the month, but I didn't think that they could last as long as three months."
Hermione growled, "I've only been pregnant a month, Ron!"
"Oh, woops!" He started. "Sorry."
"Let's celebrate, Hermione!" Ron exclaimed, ignoring Hermione's still fuming stare. "I'll grab the Fire Whiskey!"
"Ahem, Ron!" Hermione exclaimed. "Pregnant!" Ron's stare was blank. "With child!" She waved her hands in a wild way and made a crazy gesture towards her stomach. Ron still looked hopelessly confused. "Pregnant girls can't drink!"
"But won't they dehydrate?" Ron asked, thoroughly puzzled.
"I mean alcohol!!!" Hermione was screaming. "How thick are you?"
"Haha, I-uh totally knew that," Ron stuttered nervously.
"Well, we can celebrate a different way," Ron said with a grin.
"Goodnight, Ron!" Hermione called.
"Wait!" Ron begged, "Just a kiss?"
Eh, why not? "Fine."