All of the dead have been claimed by their families by now, many buried right here on the grounds.
Ginny had lost count of how many funerals she’d been to. It was one after the other after the other. She thought that all of them would be preparation for the hardest one of all.
Her brother’s casket was lowered slowly. Slowly enough for her to register temptation to fling herself down there with him.
Only then was it really starting to resonate that he was gone forever, and more tears began to fall from her eyes. This had to be some kind of record.
Ginny’s eyes barely left the ground through the entire ceremony. When they did, she refused to let them so much as look at the tombstone. Only those she had never been more grateful to have around her received so much as a cursory glance.
She met a pair of green eyes several times, held them for a moment, then let go again. Harry’s gaze was too piercing for her to focus on. They were to familiar, too comforting in this moment where she wanted nothing more for this fierce pain to run its course through her system. Let the knife go straight through her, no obstruction of her muscles and bones.
Then it would be over.
She could wake up.
Her tears blurred her mind as well as her vision. Some painful few hours later, Ginny was curled up on her bed, her arms wrapped around her knees, her mind as trapped within itself as her body was within her arms.
The same thoughts of misery went through her brain that had been there for days now, only made worse over the past few hours.
Ginny felt like she was actually drowning. Even the voice that was now in the room sounded murky as if she really was underwater…
The hand that was on her shoulder rubbed gently. At this point, she didn’t care who it was. This quiet, wordless interaction was an unbelievable comfort…
“Ginny?” The silence was finally broken. “Can you hear me?”
She didn’t even have to turn around to recognize who it was.
“Hi.” She let loose her first smile in days and turned to the speaker.
Harry Potter smiled back. “Hello.”
It’d been months since she’d been in his arms, but Ginny had replayed the many hours she’d spent there in his arms so many times that it didn’t even matter.
She sighed in relief, it was all the same.
“You’re not okay.” He stated simply.
“You being here makes it a little better.”
It was true.
Harry wiped her tears. “I’ve missed you so much, Ginny.”
She gazed at his green eyes. “So have I.”
There was so much they could, and had to, say right now.
He kissed her.
Like his embrace, she was relieved to see that hadn’t changed.
“I can’t tell you how many times I’ve fantasized about doing that again.” Harry murmured.
“Almost every waking moment.”
“So thats what you were doing all these months?”
“Well, I as somewhat productive. How about yourself?”
She laughed. “I’m so tired of being sad. Laughing is nice.”
“I’m done with the strength thing, Ginny.”
She got what he was saying exactly.
“Before I can relax, I have to make sure you’re not mad at me.”
She sat up in shock. “Why would I be mad at you?”
“I think I must’ve given you quite a fright there…”
That whole fake death thing had been rather traumatizing.
“I’m sorry.” He whispered as he kissed her soft red hair, taking in its scent. “I’ll understand if you can’t--”
“I mean it Harry.” She smiled and kissed him on the lips gently. “You have no idea…”
Ginny leaned across her bed and opened the trunk at the foot of it. She felt around until she came across an overstuffed envelope.
“These are letters I wrote you.” Ginny deposited on them on his lap. “I couldn’t send them… But, I had to at least write.”
His hands trembled as he held the envelope.
She handed him the first one.
Harry took a deep breath and quietly read the letter to himself. He could tell by the folds in the parchment that Ginny’d read it many, many, many times.
You’ve been gone nearly a year now. Sorry, I meant to say week. It feels that way, though.
I don’t know why I bother writing, no owl could ever find you, I’m sure of it. But I must admit its rather soothing. Even though I’ve put the words on paper, they still remain intensely in my head. I can’t forget you, Harry. I can’t stop wondering if I’ll ever see you again.
I guess I mustn’t think that. Good always prevails over evil, so we’re told. And you’re good. I know that. You make my life so much happier than I could even imagine. You also make it hurt more than words that you can’t be here.
Life goes on, day to day, I’m going back to Hogwarts soon. We’re trying to live our lives as normally as the circumstances allow. Which is for me, pretty much impossible. I’m trying to stay strong, because I know you would be mad at me if I just crawled up in a fetal position for a few months just because you’re not here.
I’ve been playing a lot of Quidditch lately. Its not quite the same without you being you, Ron getting frustrated and seeing Hermione struggle at something. I worry about them as well. Keep each other safe, please? I don’t know if I could stand to have my only friend be Luna though I am fond of her.
Remember if you ever want to take a break, to come home, my arms are all you’ll need. I promise that.
Missing you agonizingly,
He felt sort of strange reading this. Sure, she’d intended for him to read it. These were all things she wanted him to know.
He opened his mouth to speak, to scream, to tell her that he was sorry until he was hoarse.
“Shh…” She handed him the next one. “You told me your story, now listen to mine.”
He adjusted his glasses, bracing himself.
Word has it you made an appearance at the Ministry today. Wish I could’ve been there.
You know, seeing your face on posters everywhere could probably be considered a turn on. Of course, the “Undesirable Number One” thing is a slight deterrent, though I assure you that you’re quite desirable.
Being back at Hogwarts is so surreal. It doesn’t even feel like Hogwarts being honest. Not only because its been taken over by Dark Wizards who are liars and traitors and pure evil, but I miss you.
I don’t know what Hogwarts is like when you’re not here. Even though my first few years consisted of me fawning over you awkwardly, it meant a lot to me that you were there. I knew that if anyone messed with me, you’d kick their arse just like when you were 12. So cute.
It hurts so bad. Already things are changing around here. I don’t have you, or my brothers, I’m completely on my own! I’m so afraid. They’re HURTING kids, Harry! What if they torture me? I’m not as strong as I act, I promise you.
Here I am, playing a stupid, naive victim. When you’re out there fighting. Actually doing something. I feel so useless.
You’re always in my thoughts,
“There are dozens of these.” She said to him once his eyes left the paper. “I would write whenever I was having a really bad day. Or I just felt like I really needed you. So you can’t read all of them.”
“And why is that?” He asked, raising an eyebrow.
“Well, when I say I needed you…” She kissed him more intensely this time.
“Oh.” Harry smiled. “We can talk about that later…”
“We will.” Ginny promised.
So he went through all of the unsent non-racy letters one by one. There was an odd mixture of pain and happiness as he realized not only how much torture she endured at his sake, but the fact that she was willing to do it for HIM gave Harry an overwhelming rush of inner peace.
Finally, they arrived at the last one.
“Shall I read it aloud?”
“I suppose you can.”
He cleared his throat.
I have this feeling that things will be over soon. Wether thats in our favor or not, I can’t be sure. I only pray that if it is, things can go back to the way they used to. If it isn’t, I want to die with you.
I’ve arrived at the conclusion that I can’t live without you.
It sounds silly, and I’m sure you don’t feel the same way. You’re far too practical. Though this is true… I want nothing more than to be with you again. Please, survive for me if not for nothing else. Let me see you one more time if God forbid we don’t get to live happily ever after.
Come home. My arms are open.
And I love you, Harry Potter.
He looked to her and took her hand. Her eyes were down.
“You love me.” It wasn’t a question.
She didn’t look up.
“I love you too, Ginny.” He kissed her.
Those were the words she’d probably wanted to hear since she was ten.
But she knew that it wouldn’t have meant as much had she heard it then. Even if they’d confessed it to each other last year it wouldn’t have meant as much.
They had to have contemplated the idea that they’d never get to see each other again to know that this was for real.
Dearest to each other. Wether they liked it or not, wether by choice or by unmovable force.
Harry and Ginny will never let each other be apart ever again.
And thats just fine by both of them.
A/N: This was my first one shot! I'm glad you took the time to read, I hope that you liked it and would be so kind as to leave me a review.
thanks so much!