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The Return of Miss Potter by Zyii
Chapter 9 : Square One
Rating: MatureChapter Reviews: 1

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Hannah opened a bleary eye, blinking rapidly at the unaccustomed light. All around her things were white, she closed her eyes again unsure if she was truly awake or not. She tried flexing her fingers, it worked! Then she tried moving her toes, and got the same excited feeling when it worked. She tried moving her back but was met with a never-ending surge of pain. It hit her like a ton of bricks, all that had happened in last couple of weeks that is. She’d waited so long for them to come but in the end she’d had to save herself. They’d left her till it was almost too late, why had her patronus taken so long to reach them.

Her gasp of pain seemed to awaken the sleeping person Hannah’s eyes had missed, “Hannah honey, are you awake?” the voice asked, no Cissie asked, Hannah corrected herself. There was no point in hiding or pretending not to be awake, as much as Hannah would have preferred to be asleep again, the price of waking up triggered an enormous amount of pain screaming down the left side of her back.

She could hardly speak, her voice cracked and ragged with disuse, “Water” she managed to choke out. Cissie perhaps was only too happy to oblige Hannah on this fact and handed her a glass of ice cold water. Hannah gratefully sipped the water sighing in pleasure as the coldness cascaded down her throat, soothing the pain away.

“It hurts” she whispered to a concerned Cissie, “I..I can’t” the glass dropped from her hand sending a stream of cold water down her front, as her mind slipped once more into the realms of unconsciousness.

“Hannah Hannah!!” Cissie called frantically to no avail. She rushed to get Madam Pomfrey but she could offer no words of comfort to Cissie. It had long since been discussed that after a week of unconsciousness Hannah’s condition was uncharted, her body needed time to heal and being that the others knew nothing of what happened to her, much like when they rescued her at the end of the summer, all they could do now was wait.

Hannah ran swiftly through her dreamland, the trees twisting and spiralling out of control, blocking out the sun and leaving Hannah in darkness, screams, shouts, vicious remarks cut through the dark like viper snakes. Everytime Hannah seemed close to escape, dark hands would drag her back down again. She could see the faces of Cissie, Draco, Harry and the others but she could never reach them. She was trapped in a never-ending torrent of loneliness, fear and emptiness, she was fighting to get out, fighting so hard.

The sun comes out from a sea of clouds, I shed my disguise, we laugh out loud, I am sure that someday soon we’ll all be just fine.

They took shifts to stay by Hannah’s bed at night. Tonight Harry took up place next to his sisters sleeping form. He prayed for some kind of improvement. He carried a guilt upon his shoulders, so large tis a wonder he did not drown in it. He had sworn to protect his sister and he had failed, he wished for her to return to him, he needed her desperately.

Hannah started to shift in her sleep, at first only slight movements occurred but soon after her body t began tossing and turning, the bed sheets becoming entangled around her, turning slightly damp as her fear induced sweat fell upon the bed. Harry tried his best to console his sisters sleeping form but to no change, Hannah’s form fought Harry’s restraint across her body. A scream so blood curdling it would have sent spiders running leapt from Hannah’s mouth.

Her eyes opened and she appeared ridged for a momentary second before recoiling away from the person still touching her. A hurt expression crossed through Harry’s eyes as a very flustered Madam Pomfrey ran into the room.

“Please help me” whimpered Hannah, Madam Pomfrey nodded.

“Harry, go get the others” she waved her hand in his direction while her attention was otherwise focused on fussing over Hannah.

Dumbledore paced the length of the hospital wing, the others seated on an assortment of chairs looking worried and hopeful. Each curious of what happened to Hannah but fearful of asking. It was hours before they were allowed in to see Hannah and only a few people at a time. Madam Pomfrey told them she was still very fragile and vunerable and that she wasn’t very trusting of others. It was recommended that Hannah should be allowed to chose who to see, so it was Cissie, Draco, Harry, Molly, Luna and Dumbledore who were allowed in. They all gathered round her bed, some with faces of concern, others with curiousness. It was painful to see her like this, in such a far worse condition than the last time she was in the hospital wing. The new scar running down the left of her back still leaking tine drops of blood.

It was time thought Hannah, her daytimes lacking in trust, her nights filled with nightmares, “Blaise Zabini” she whispered, Dumbledore’s head snapped up and Draco looked stricken, “I was kidnapped by Blaise Zabini” Cissie and Molly gasped, while Harry clenched his fists together in an attempt to control his anger.

“You all want answers right? I know, I can see it in your eyes. You left me. All of you. I sent you a sign and it took you a week to save me. It is true then by your expressions that you found them all dead apart from the mysterious Zabini” Hannah’s voice was bitter, growing more confident with each world, like her temperament had changed in the last two weeks, she was no longer this pathetic little creature scared of her past and afraid of her future. She was now hardened in life, things had changed and she was different now, more herself before the rise of Voldemort.

“I killed them you know, the deatheaters. I killed them all. Zabini, he took me, he wanted to try and control me as Voldemort had done. I’m afraid he hoped I’d kill you Dumbledore and then when he realised I wouldn’t oblige him, he tried to use my own power against me” she laughed scathingly.

“He tried to take me you know. Not that it did him much good. He didn’t like being told no. The scar your all trying so desperately to ignore was his handiwork. He said if he couldn’t have me then he’d make sure no one else would want me either. It’s disgusting is it not?” she asked to no one in particular.

“And as for the matter that you Dumbledore are so eager to ask about, yes I am a secret animagus. No one taught me, it just happened. That was not the first time I have changed, now if you please, leave me alone, I am sure I have been gossiped about enough already”.

“Hannah I’m-“

“Just don’t Harry. I understand, but you came too late. It’s fine, it just life, you have to move on”

The people surrounding Hannah dutifully filed out of the room, Draco stared longingly at Hannah, who was she? How could he have failed her. The only positive person seemed to be Luna, she looked hopeful and happy. “You guys shouldn’t look so melancholy” she said to the others, “This is the Hannah I remember. This is the Hannah from before Voldemort. He may have broken her but now she’s fixed herself. You just wait!” Luna gushed excitedly.

The degree to which the guilt rolled off Harry, like a whirling wing unwilling to stop, those weary of Harry was nothing compared to those fearful of Draco, his anger radiated off him and struck down all those near him. The combining result being two emotionally confused boys and a jumble of surrounding people either attempting to protect them from their own harm, or jumping out of the way to avoid them.

The gossip machine had already begun turning its wheels. It’s impossible to imagine the pain and anguish these boys felt unless of course you’d been in a similar situation of losing something you’d treasured so much, only to find it again when all hope was lost. It was no wonder then that the bonds between Harry and Draco had tightened further. Gone now was all trace that they’d ever been enemies, they’d passed from acquaintances and moved straight into a close friendly atmosphere.

Right now they were huddled in a corner, planning suspiciously together. Much to the annoyance of Ron – who still harboured a dislike for Draco and the growing friendship between Draco and Harry. They’d decided against Luna’s advice of leaving Hannah alone and letting her set her own boundaries. They were devising a plan to make sure Hannah was protected at all times, they were acting with her best interests at heart...

This is how well it went:

Draco and Harry, shoulders hunched pinned on either side of Hannah, forcing her to march between them, protected, always protected, never alone. She’d long since given up arguing with them both, they didn’t even listen and she was already angered that she kept having to repeat herself. When she wasn’t being frog marched around by Harry and Draco, she was being followed by Hermione, shadowed by Ron or forced into lengthy conversations by Ginny. It seemed almost everyone had taken orders from Harry and Draco and were seemingly able to resist Hannah’s plea’s for release. Blaise was still missing, Hannah’s boys weren’t taking any chances on her.

Hannah was slowly reaching her limit, actually that’s a lie, she reached her limit a long time ago, now it took a lot of effort not to punch either Draco or Harry in the face, when they came to ‘escort’ her to places. She knew deep down that they were only acting out of guilt and with her best interests at heart but she was not so easy to forgive them as perhaps she should. It was true she had hardened in recent weeks, become more herself from before Voldemort came for her. Perhaps that was what was frustrating to others, the fact that she had suddenly changed into someone who didn’t rely on their help so much.

“I need to talk to Severus” she muttered out loud, in the confined quarters of her room. But how would she manage it with everyone hovering around her, it wasn’t like she had Harry’s invisibility cloak to shield herself from others, and it would involve way too much hassle to get the cloak in the first place. She couldn’t transform herself for fear of more acknowledgement of her secret. So instead she must opt for stealthy movements. Perhaps if she attempted escaping later in the day, she might have more chance of success.

It was approximately 9 O’clock, ‘her boys’ finally leaving her alone so she could ‘study’ or ‘sleep’. This was the time to star, the time for her to escape.


“Yes Hannah”

“Can you distract the others so I can escape?”

“You want to escape? Are you in trouble?” she searched Hannah’s emotions and found nothing amiss.

“No, I just want some peace of mind. I need to talk to Severus” she said firmly.

“Oh ok, I’ll distract them for you” replied a teary eyed Dora.

I hear a choir of angels on a dead end street, the faces of children make me believe that someday, someday soon the dark will subside.

She snuck out her room making minimal noise. Sticking to the shadows of the hall, she made her way down towards Dumbledore’s office. The voice of reason in her head sounded suspiciously like Draco, warning her that he didn’t approve of her actions and worried for her safety. Yet she refused the voice of reason and continued in her quest to Dumbledore’s office.

She’d reached Dumbledore’s office, finally! She assumed he’d been expecting her as his office door was wide open, she walked inside. There he was as regal as any other, sat upon a high chair behind his desk, he looked at her expectantly.

“I want to speak to Severus please” she asked, looking determinedly into his twinkling eyes, “Alone” she added.

“Very well” said Dumbledore, rising from his chair. If he was talking to anyone else he would likely have said more but with Hannah, he thought her unpredictable and therefore decided against further conversation. He made himself scarce, she looked like a lost girl on a mission.

“Severus I’” she didn’t know where to start, she wished he was alive for her to talk to. It unnerved her talking to a portrait.

“Your lost” he clarified for her, she nodded. “Hannah it’s alright to feel lost. I’d be worried if you didn’t. But listen to me, you’ve come so far. Sure you’ve face more cruelty than others would believe, buy your strong and you survived” his heart called out to her as he watched the tears trickle down her face.

“I know your angry and hurt but don’t push the others away. Those boys would do anything for you and you know that’s true. And what about Cissie and Luna, what do you think your distancing is doing to them?!” Hannah’s painful sobbing broke into the silence.

“Don’t cry little one, everything will work out. Go easy on everyone, they don’t know this side of you. They only recognise your scared timid side. Please don’t hide that away. I know your having difficulty trusting again by please try”

“I miss you”

“Sorry I didn’t hear that”

“I miss you” Hannah said with move conviction.

“I miss you too but I’m write here, always” she nodded mutely, “music”


“Why don’t you ask Dumbledore if there is a piano you could use. I know you love playing and you haven’t had a chance to play much in the last three years” it startled Hannah how much Severus knew and remembered of her.

Hannah nodded glumly, “Goodnight Hannah” said Severus, Hannah took this as her cue to leave and walked out the office and straight into a warm person.

“Oh I’m sorry” she looked up and gasped, “Dumbledore I-“

He waved her apology away, “Floor 3, down the hall there’s an empty classroom on the right, that I believe has a very old piano you could use” his eyes twinkled and Hannah blushed, realising her dismissal yet again.

Sitting in front of the ivory keys was like nothing had changed. They bought her love, comfort and safety and as she began to play, she lost herself in the music failing to notice the two boys and elf that stood secretly watching.

We’re calling out answers we don’t know, Calling on friends we thought we’d lost, We all have to see what we’ve become, Waiting on chances so far gone, Hoping our answers light the dark, Praying someday soon we’ll understand, As we search for the promised land.

I see a hold host of sweet confusion, And we all bleed but some men choose to stand up, Stand up straight when there’s something to lose.

It’s not armies at war, A search for the truth, The questions we ask leave us more confused, There’s nowhere left to rest, So what can we do.

We’re calling out answers we don’t know, Calling on friends we thought we’d lost, We all have to see what we’ve become, Waiting on chances so far gone, Hoping our answers light the dark, Praying someday soon we’ll understand, As we search for the promised land.

I swear I believe, I said, ‘I swear I believe’

She finished the song and quietly ran her fingers over the keys.

“Someday my memories will fade” she whispered as the tears came. She broke down completely, all the tears she’d been hiding came pouring out. “I am safe and happy” her voice broke, her smile portraying what her eyes were scared of, she wrapped her arms around herself, begging the tears to stop. 

Italic song lyrics - Ron Pope's I Believe.

I'm not sure if I like this chapter but it gets happier after this :3

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