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My twist on Irony by hp luver
Chapter 5 : Of breakfasts and Dances
Rating: MatureChapter Reviews: 3

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A/N I do not own harry potter no matter how much I wish I did that honour goes to J.K Rowling and I also do not own Fallin’ by Alicia Keys




Thank you, all for reading Heres your chapter



What on earth am I thinking I can’t go over there and do this dad will kill me! What if I look like an idiot, wait who am I kidding of course I'm going to look like an idiot I have to lap dance Malfoy MALFOY for merlins sake oh dear lord above Professor Longbottom knows my parents. He’ll surely tell mum and dad what if I get a detention for it oh my gosh it will be my first detention that is one hundred percent my fault I cant let that happen but I have to or I have to … I cant even think of it ugh I guess its now or never.




By the end of my mental speech I had just about reached the slytherin table and the great hall had gone completely quite like it wasn’t enough that I’m a Gryfindor going over to the pit of snakes I’m a Weasley too! I conjured a boom box like the one mum keeps in the kitchen instead of a wizard wireless, I already new my song choice, I would dance to ‘Fallin’ by Alicia Keys because it was slow but still slightly sensual. 






“Weasley? I mean Rose?” Malfoy got out while choking on his toast because I had started the music and had already taken off my school cloak to reveal what I was wearing underneath which was a magically shortened skirt which showed off my legs but still let me move around one of Lily’s Hogwarts shirt which let me tell you was quite the tight fit it especially accentuated my uh-hem chest area being too small as it is and showing off my flat stomach because it didn’t reach the top of my skirt.  As the music began to increase slowly in speed I conjured a chair behind the slytherin bench and levitated Malfoy into it and began my dance thanking the stars above that my mother had forced me to take dance classes as a child and during the summer break from good old hoggiewarts. I slowly made my way around the chair and would roll my head slowly around counter clockwise and drop down at random times taking my time coming back up, I would also trail my hand around and down his chest all the while Malfoy sat there in complete shock as did most of the great hall there was complete silence and as the song came to a finish I sat myself down on his lap and in the most innocent voice I could think of I whispered ‘thanks’ in his ear before I got up and walked back to the Gryfindor table and picking my cloak up from the Ravenclaw table as I passed it.




"Rose … I-uh-um what the bloody hell was that!?” Hugo just about screamed at me from Hufflepuff table granted he was right behind me seeing as how the tables were lined up but still is there really a reason to scream?




Oh great I'm talking to myself again

 answer him!




Don’t yell at me!




If I don’t who will your sitting there looking like a complete and utter loon!




who are you anyway?




I’m your conscience you dolt who else would be inside your head




Well excuse me … I think I’ll name you pickles




Is there something wrong with you answer your bloody brother!



Honestly there is no reason to be getting so upset pickles




Oh right I’d better answer my brother but wait he wasn’t at the game yesterday and if I tell him that breaks the rules oh great I have to sound like a slut just great first pickles now this.




“Well Hugo I do believe it was a lap dance don’t you agree?” I told him in my most superior tone … one I only ever used to use when talking to our slut of a next door neighbour.




“I know that it was a lap dance Rose and I shudder asking this but, why in the name of Merlins saggy balls would you give Malfoy as in Scorpius Malfoy a friggen lap dance?” Well who new my brother has a bit of a potty mouth tut tut.




"Language Hugo”




“Have you lost your mind you just gave Malfoy a lap dance in front of the entire bloody school and then sat down to continue eating breakfast as if it was nothing and your telling me to watch my bloody language?!” Really he listens to dad way too much I mean geez he managed to use ‘bloody’ twice in one sentence.




"Well Hugo there is nothing anywhere that says giving out dances at breakfast is against the rule nor is playing music or even what I’m wearing because it is all Hogwarts uniform, you on the other hand have broken the rules by using your language so I see nothing of what I did wrong or why you are so upset.”

As I finished saying that I stood up and walked out of the front hall doors I figured I would only be questioned more if I stayed so I headed down to my first class which was charms which I just so happened to have with Scorpius well at least in class there couldn’t be any questions asked.  Right?





A/N I know that it was short and I apologize but my computer was completely wiped out so I'm trying to re-write everything that I lost as quickly as I can

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