Chapter 1 : Hate: Marina
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Had a Wife But Couldn’t Keep Her
Put Her in a Pumpkin Shell
And there He Kept Her Very Well”
James is different.
We’re both different actually compared to the rest of the topsy turvy world.
I mean we’re just not meant to mix with other people. If everyone’s body consisted of 75% water then ours consisted of 75% oil. We’re machines — our programming designed long ago — and we’re not liable to change.
But there isn’t a problem with that. Not at all.
Once, a long time ago, we were normal. We had once been little tykes running around and yelping over our scabbed knees. We had dreamt about what would happen when we were older and what we would do at Hogwarts. We had been shiny and beautiful and new.
But that was before I even met him — before he even met me.
We met in first year, on the train to Hogwarts. All knobby knees and pink noses. By then we had known we would be tough, we would be on top and everyone would love us. That’s all we knew of each other and we were fine with it. We became close friends after that first meeting. My name, “Rexroth, Marina” came right after his, “Potter, James” and I followed him into Gryffindor.
Of course we weren’t the best of friend. Not by a long shot. I was just, you know, the girl best friend. The one he could laugh with about gossip. Riveting right? It was enough though because at the end of fourth year he told me he loved me, and we’ve been together ever since.
Yes, we were that couple. The golden one, the bright flame that would never go out.
A good majority of the student body campaigned heavily against it. James would be holding my hand between classes or even at dinner and everyone would voice their opinion.
“They’re still together?”
“I hear their relationship’s on the rocks.”
“They need to break up.”
“She so doesn’t’ deserve him.”
As if it mattered!
But it did. We lived off the rumors and the comments. We basked in the glory, whether it was negative or positive. So long as we had their attention we were good. We didn’t care.
Besides we love each other.
I gaped at my best friend, Rose Weasley rather expressionlessly. She was sitting Indian style on the other end of my bed, her eyes pleading and sorrowful.
I love James.
I could feel the anger and the hurt stirring just behind my eyes and deep in my chest. I let myself explode with a horrible scream of pure anguish and I couldn’t help but pat myself on the back when Rose flinched. I wanted to strangle her. Don’t shoot the messenger? Frankly, I don’t give a shit. I wanted her dead.
James loves me.
I jolted off my bed and hurtled down the stairs into the Gryffindor common room where I found him. He was laughing, just smiling and laughing with his friends as if life was still hunky dory. I marched up to him and went about tearing every single strand of perfect, black, soft, messy hair I could get my grubby, betrayed fingers on.
We mostly love each other.
“YOU CHEATED!” I screeched over his strangled and pained yelps, angry tears streaming down my cheeks.
Okay, I hate him.
Suddenly he was fighting back. He was trying to get a hold of me by my neck so I could stop hitting and scratching every inch I could reach. His friends had backed off to give us room to . . . what were we doing might you ask? Well it’s obvious. We were wrestling like our lives depended on it, only unlike the other times I wasn’t getting any sort of turn on whatsoever.
And, he hates me too.
I eventually ran out of energy to fight him, all I could seem to do was cry like a baby as he drove me farther into the common room floor. I stared up at his scratched face (my doing) with a dead, almost pleading look. He looked absolutely livid. He had dirty green eyes mixed with blue and orange and right now fire took control. His hair was standing on end and with each struggled breath the soft strands would tremble as if in the wake of a large gust of wind.
He was all beauty and power. We were meant to be together, I knew it. We deserved each other but I didn’t want him anymore. I hated him. With a sudden burst of energy that I really didn’t have I shoved him from on top of me.
I glared at him as I pushed myself to my feet. I had forgotten my fellow Gryffindors who were giving us their undivided attention. “Why did you do it?”
James rolled his eyes before leaning closer. “Why did you?”
A frustrated growl gurgled its way up my throat and my hands clenched into fists. “That was two years ago! You can’t pull that card every time you fuck up, James.”
James shook his head. “This isn’t about a stupid timeline.”
I gaped, as fresh tears prickled at my eyes. For the first time in about two years I was afraid to look at him. I just looked at his feet. He cheated on purpose. “Well then, in that case,” I stuck my hand out and slapped my most winning smile on my face. I waited until he cautiously yet confidently took shook my hand. “Well played, captain.”
With that I walked back up to my dorm where I stayed for a week and cried my eyes out.
We had been shiny and beautiful and new. Now we were old and our screws needed tightening and our cogs needed replacing.
Oh, and our hearts have glitches in their programming.