This was it. The final day where I could still be a child without any excuse. The final day when I could depend on others in those little everyday things. The final day I could act totally innocent about what the world held.
Silly I guess to think about it like that.I hadn't been a child for years, the world we lived in demanded maturity pretty damn fast. But in some eyes I was still a child.
Everyone else seemed to notice the feeling of departing immaturity, indeed Sirius was going all out ensuring he didn't waste a moment of it. He deserved to have a few extra hours considering his life up until Hogwarts. Seven short years really wasn't enough time to fully experience the joys of total innocence that I did. Remus too had his childhoodcut short, having to keep up the moral of his parents while dealing with his lycanthropy. Pete, Lils and I were lucky in that respect.
But now, adulthood loomed and what an adulthood it would be. Death, prejudice, war. I had no fear for myself of course. My fate was set. What would happen would happen I just hoped that it would be a bloody great adventure before it finally ended. What I feared was the fates of those closest to me.
Sirius: Blood traitor, impulsive,irrational.
Remus: Werewolf, pessimistic, uncertain.
Peter: Weak, easily influenced, cowardly.
Lily: Mudblood, caring, forgiving, naive.
That was the problem with knowing people so well. I knew the flaws that would kill them. I of course did everything I could to save them, getting Sirius to use self-control, trying to show Reems the good side of things, helping Pete stand up for himself, teaching Lily brutality. It changed them of course, whether for good or for bad I didn't know, but if it delayed that pain, that grief I would do all I could to change them.
Sirius: My Right Hand.
Remus: My Head
Peter: My Confidence
Lily: My Heart
To lose any of them would be the worst blow possible. Physical pain wasn't enough to describe even the thought of it.
I could feel the warmth of Lily through her light shirt, I could smell her, a mixture of clean clothes, the watermelon she ate for breakfast, some sort of flower and sunshine. I could see Pete standing apart from the group taking in everything possible, looking determined. Remus breathing in the sun that he loved so much, his yearning evident stood next to me. Sirius was running everywhere, carefree as he could be, enveloping people in enormous hugs, inciting rebellion in the younger students, and acting like the big puppy he always transformed into
"Prongs check out this duck!" Sirius's enthusiasm made me smile, watching him badger the crippled bird. "Hey! Hey,what do you call a woman with only one leg? Eileen!!"
I laughed along with the absurdity of it all. The train whistle blew signaling our last moment here and our first moment there. I steered Lily towards the carriages, my friends surrounding me. People said things that looked the same were the mirror image of them. But mirrors turned everything around. Look at my fears in a mirror, and they become my hopes and dreams.