Chapter 5 : Never Enough
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The room was dark, and the only light that came from the door was about to disappear when he shut the door. My heart was pounding a mile a minute.
Then my world went black. I could feel his presence behind me. I could feel the tension and the crackle of electricity that buzzed between us. There was a connection there and I was excited to explore it.
His hands went to my arms as he stood behind me. His touch was light and I could feel my body shake with anticipation. But I moved away. I didn’t want to make this easy. I wanted it, but he wasn’t going to win just like that. With a flick of my wand I lit low-burning candles all around the room. It was an ideal setting for my seduction. There was a sofa off to one side sitting on a Persian rug. On the other side of the room stood a big opulent and luxurious bed that was so daunting I didn’t even want to think about.
I turned to look back at Draco. He’d remained where I stood a moment ago but had crossed his arms and his eyes had gone all dark.
“You’re not going to change your mind now, are you?” he asked in a low and challenging tone.
I let my lips curve themselves into a small smile. “Not a chance, Malfoy.”
“Why are you running away then?”
I shook my head, “Not running, just making you work for it.”
“I thought you were the one who wanted me so badly?” he took a few steps forward, closing the distance between us again.
I lifted one hand to his shoulder, grabbed a fistful of robes and tugged him even closer. His scent was intoxicating, his presence made me shake, but I held true to my purpose there. I didn’t want to get lost in this game we had started, but it was so hard when he affected me this much. I brought my mouth up to his ear. I could feel his hands moving to my waist as I spoke. “I never said I didn’t want you.”
Then I shoved him back, making him fall onto the sofa. I shrugged out of my robes and removed my shoes and socks. There was nothing more irritating than a man trying to take your pants off when still wearing shoes.
Draco had taken off his robes and started to unbutton his black dress-shirt when I moved to stand between his legs. He stopped and looked up at me, the desire plainly written all over his face.
I bent over forward, my hands going to his shoulders. I took a deep breath and kissed him. His hands almost frantically found my hips and drew me onto his lap. He kissed me back and all time seemed to stop. It was just him and me for who knows how long, kissing and touching and, if I didn’t know any better, loving each other. When our clothes disappeared and our breathing became labored still we didn’t stop. When we cried out, our muscles spent, sweat dripping from us, we still didn’t stop.
He was right. He was like a drug to me. This one time would never be enough.
It surprised me to find myself waking the next morning with my head on his chest, his arm still wrapped around me. Wasn’t this supposed to be a one-time thing? I thought that when I woke up he would be gone or getting dressed to slip out quietly leaving me behind. Yet there we were, laying side by side, my one leg still wrapped with his, as if what we had was more than just a one-night-stand.
“I know you’re awake,” Draco’s voice made me jump guiltily. “Your breathing sounds different from when you’re asleep.”
“Oh…” I didn’t know how to respond to that. And he sounded different too. He didn’t sound bored or smug or cruel even. He sounded…content. It scared the crap out of me. I knew from the beginning that there’d be a chance I had more of an emotional attachment to him than he had for me, but now I actually wondered.
I moved to get up and away from him. His arm tightened around me, preventing me from leaving. “Don’t go yet.”
I stilled. “Okay…” I didn’t know what else I could say. This was all too weird.
“Relax,” Draco said, exasperated.
I tried to relax but I just couldn’t. I pulled back. “I can’t relax.” I grabbed the sheet on top and pulled it around me and started snatching up my clothes, leaving Draco lying on the bed naked.
“What are you doing, Morris?”
My head snapped up. “So it’s ‘Morris’ again?”
“What are you talking about?” he rolled his eyes.
“I’m talking about this!” I waved my hands around as if that explained things. It was all too strange. “What are we doing right now?”
With a smart-ass smirk on his face, he replied, “Well, I think we had a pretty hot night and now you’re acting like a lunatic.”
“I’m the lunatic? Yeah, that’s right I’m the lunatic. God Draco, this is a one-time thing!”
“Was it?!” He moved fast, throwing his legs over the side of the bed, stepping into his pants and pulling them up to his hips. He didn’t button them up. His stare piercing right through the clothes I was holding and the sheet wrapped around me and made me feel like I had nothing at all covering me. “Was it a one-time thing Sadie? After last night I don’t think either of us is willing to give what we have up, why can’t you see that?
“Don’t come any closer Draco. I don’t know anything right now. You need to give me some time and space to think.”
He held up his hands in surrender and then shoved them in his pockets. “You want time, you got time.” He grabbed his shirt and robes, and as he shrugged them on he added, “But I can guarantee you that by the end of the week, you are going to come crawling back to me.” He turned to walk towards the door.
This struck a nerve. “Hey!” He stopped but didn’t turn around. “You don’t get to talk to me like that, Malfoy.” I dropped my clothes, clutching at the sheet, and walked to stand in front of him. “And I never go crawling back. I don’t do that, ever!”
He raised his eyebrow. “Don’t be so sure, Sadie. I’m hard to resist.” And with a final sweep, he grazed his shoulder against mine and was gone.
I fell onto the sofa beside me, sitting at first and then I leaned over on to my side. I was exhausted. I had gotten a little sleep, but not that much. And then waking up this morning my heart had been beating so fast that I couldn’t even think straight. What had been going through Draco’s mind? He’d held on to me like this was some intimate encounter and not what it actually had been…which I still didn’t even know what to call. And then what was with the attitude change when I couldn’t stay in that intimate setting at his side. I mean really, did he think that I was looking for a little love making and then the breakfast after kind of thing? I thought I’d made it quite clear last night that I didn’t want anything more than the one night to get him out of my system. He’d obviously grazed right over that one and thought we had a thing going now.
I raised my arm, laying it across my forehead, covering my face. What had I gotten myself into? I hated to think that I might actually go “crawling” back for more…and I hated to admit that Draco might be right…but he might have been. I’d have to use whatever resolve I had to steer clear of him. He was bad for me and while last night was fun—more than fun really, it was mind-blowing—I couldn’t risk any kind of a relationship with Draco. He’d screw with everything and I did not want him to break my heart when I knew he was capable of doing just that.
I sat up abruptly then and pulled the sheet tighter around myself. No, I wouldn’t let this get to me. He’d gotten under my skin before and I did not need that feeling to continue. I gathered up my clothes and started pulling them on. I didn’t bother making the bed. It would be made as soon as I left and the door closed behind me. That’s the basis of the Room of Requirement. As I looked back at the room I thought briefly that I might see it again but didn’t want to think about that too hard because it meant I’d lost the battle with myself and fallen for Draco. And that I would absolutely not let happen.
To get my mind off…well everything…I decided to do my homework. I would have gotten there eventually anyway, but this way I didn’t have to think about it and then try to not think about it. I just threw myself into my work. So much so that by 10pm that night I was done absolutely everything and I had the choice: either go to bed or let my mind wander. I didn’t want to do either so that left me searching for an alternative.
Racquel was currently across the room talking with Hermione Granger and Harry Potter. I didn’t particularly like Harry, despite how famous he was and all the hushed tones when people were talking about him. I didn’t want to go over and talk to them, but it was better than thinking about Draco.
I was rising to go over to my friends when an owl swooped in and dropped a letter on the table in front of me. I recognized the letterhead and the expensive green ink that my father used immediately. I picked up the envelope, held it up to the light and then dropped it inside the open book I had on the table before me. Then I slammed the book shut, depositing it back in my book bag. Whatever my father had to say to me was inconsequential and I didn’t want to hear it. I had never really ignored my father before, thinking that it was only a matter of time before I turned 17 and then he couldn’t order me around anymore. But the way my life at school was shaping up called for some decent ignore-time for the high and mighty Loden Morris.
Instead of walking over to Racquel and Hermione as planned, I got up and took my book bag up to the dorm room. My father was an arrogant asshat and while I still loved him somewhere inside of me, it was really hard to believe we were actually related. I was truly still upset at him for driving my mother away. She had been the life of the party and the opposite of everything my father was. This is why she was an actress and followed her heart instead of her pocketbook. I don’t even know when the last time it was my father did something purely for the fun of it.
I deposited my book bag on the floor beside my bed, kicking it under so I didn’t have to look at it knowing that the letter was inside a book inside that bag. It took some real balls to ignore my father. No doubt if he didn’t receive a response within the hour he would contact Professor McGonagall and have her hunt me down. Just once I’d like her to give him a piece of her mind. She was a ballsy woman—that much I knew, but my father was accustomed to getting what he wanted.
I undid my school tie, kicked off my ordinary black sneakers and took off my knee high socks. I chuckled to myself looking at the items, knowing what my father would say about them. He had for years, since I started going to school here actually, tried to change the school uniforms to be more fashion trendy. I always laughed at him when he mentioned it. He wanted the world to know that his daughter went to Hogwarts and that it was the most chic of all magical schools. I remember telling him about the Beauxbatons girls who came to Hogwarts in my fourth year, one morning during breakfast at Christmas break. He almost bit off the end of his spoon.
Despite my attempts to ignore my book bag and its contents, I was drawn back to it and I pulled out the letter, ripped it open accordingly. At first I was annoyed, then as my eyes widened and mouth dropped open, I was severely pissed. I needed my best friend.
I whipped down the stairs again and crossed the room to Racquel. “Read this,” I tossed it at her.
“Well hello to you too,” Racquel teased lightly as she unfolded the letter. “Say hello to Hermione won’t you?”
I turned to Hermione, “Hello, this is an emergency, I need Racquel.”
Hermione shook her head, “No problem. We were done here anyways.” She stood and left, “See you around Racquel.”
Racquel waved an absent hand as she peered down at the letter. I stood there impatiently, knowing the words she was reading were as much of a shock to her as they had been to me. When she was finished she looked up at me and said three letters, “W-T-F!?!?!”
“My life is a living hell!” I flopped down on the seat that Hermione had just vacated. “What am I going to do?”
“Do?! What does that mean?”
“It means that I cannot allow this to happen. He can’t do this to me.”
“He’s not doing this to you Sadie,” Racquel tried to reason, “he’s just doing what he thinks is best for him.”
“Pfft, best for him my ass. Sometimes I wonder if he is literally trying to ruin my life.”
“I doubt that. It says that they’ve been talking about it for a while now and have finally come to a decision.”
“She’s half his age! Her name is Candy!” I almost yelled across the table, surely turning a few heads around the Common Room, not that I noticed.
My father, Loden Morris, fashion gazillionaire extraordinaire was going to marry Candy Monroe, his “girlfriend” of three years. My father was pushing fifty and she was only just twenty-four. And she was one of the most irritating individuals on the planet. She had fake boobs, fake lips, her ass was probably fake, her blonde hair was most definitely fake, and my father was falling for it, hook, line and sinker. She was after his money and he was as blind as a bat about the whole ordeal.
“Yes, her name is Candy, but he’s your father, and a grown man. It’s not like you can tell him not to marry her. Your relationship isn’t that great to begin with.”
“They’re having a Christmas wedding…I have no time to split them up. Shit this is bad. I need to tell my mom.”
Racquel’s mouth tightened to a thin line and I knew immediately she was thinking something she refused to say. “Out with it,” I prompted.
“You’re not going to like it.”
“With the way my life is heading, I don’t think it’ll make a difference. Now out with it.”
“Do you think your mother will care? When was the last time you saw her?”
I sighed. She was right. I hadn't seen my mother in two years and it had been for a total of two hours. She’d been in London on a layover (taking muggle transportation because her acting troop was a combination of muggle and wizard) and I’d been on summer vacation. She told me she loved me and that she missed me but knowing her she’d probably just been acting. She’d always loved doing her own thing. Sometimes I wondered if I was just another mistake in her life, just like my father had been.
“I guess I’m doomed.”
Racquel smiled sympathetically. “You’re also a drama queen. Honestly Sadie, worse things have happened. I can pull quite a few to my mind actually.”
“I know. I’m messed up.”
Racquel chuckled, “Which is why I adore you, Sadie.”
“You’re the only one.”
“That’s not true. Draco’s hard-on seems real enough to me.” She winked.
“Damnit.” Life just kept on getting better, didn’t it?
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