Chapter 1 : An Unexpected Adventure
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It was just all too much to handle right now. Dora knew that she had been up against a battle when she had realized that she was in love with Remus to begin with but now... now she didn't know what he was going to say or think. It had been bad enough when he had gone on and on about how he was too old or too poor or even too dangerous to deserve to be loved. To deserve to be loved by her. Now everything was just going to be ten times worse when it came to her actually talking to him for one very simple yet altogether complicated reason.
Nymphadora Lupin had just found out she was pregnant.
And this small fact was quite frankly scaring her out of her wits. Dora was in a complete and utter mess of tangled emotions as she moved vaguely around the kitchen. She was trying to tidy up after supper, to get her emotions under control and actually postpone having to figure out how to tell her husband.
Excitement. That was the first emotion that had bubbled up although it was rather quickly squashed by the stronger feelings of fear and worry. For Merlin's sake... they were in a war! They were in a war and she had two aunts – one who was very much the definition of insane – after her blood. Literally. So now was most definitely not the time to bring a child into the world. And she wasn't even going into the worry about what Remus was going to say about them having a child. Not when he had already argued he was too dangerous for her. What would he think about a baby being around? It was really no wonder that her hair had gotten stuck on a dark, brooding black.
No matter what Dora did her hair would not change back and she knew that that meant that she was going to have to give in and tell Remus. Sooner rather than later, before she wound up in even more of a state than she was in now.
A plate slipped from her hands and the witch couldn't help sighing heavily. Dora knew that she was clumsy, that wasn't a secret, but this was the fourth plat she had broken since dinner and she was in too much of an emotional state to even try to repair them. Not something that was normal, even for her. Pulling her wand from her pocket, as her hands shook, she magicked the mess away, before leaning against the counter, deep in thought.
She was an Auror damn it. If she wasn't able to stop her hands from shaking and control her emotions at the idea of being pregnant during a war then why on earth was she allowed to chase after criminals to fight and apprehend them? It hardly seemed smart from the Ministry's side of things at any rate although that said, the Ministry really hadn't given her any kind of reason to think that they were remotely intelligent as of late.
Late. Just the word held connotations that tore her mind from the topic of the Ministry and held it firmly back on the thought of telling Remus. Glancing around the kitchen, almost wishing – for once – that there was something more to be done in here Dora sighed once more. It was show time. This had to be done now, while she had some kind of nerve about her as she pocketed her wand and moved towards the door that led to the rest of their small but comfortable home. Like a plaster. Best to tell him and find out his reaction now than to worry about it anymore...
“Remus?” She called softly, looking for the man and yet at the same time feeling her courage beginning to wane. Maybe if he didn't hear her she could postpone this all just a little bit longer. Just long enough for her to actually work out what it was that she wanted to say, although that hope was dashed as he acknowledged her call, causing her to swallow and step forward towards the study.
It was time.
Remus rubbed his temple, reading over what he had just written down. This war was keeping him up to his eyeballs in work, keeping him up until all hours in the study working out what it would be that the werewolves were likely to do next. Hunching – if possible – even further over the work on his desk, Remus scratched a line through the last sentence, pursing his lips as he did so.
This wasn't easy. Trying to think like the killer he was not.
Of course, he was a werewolf and that was never going to go away. Once a month he was dangerous, to everybody around him, but other than that Remus was not one that wanted to hurt innocent people. He wanted Voldemort to fall, to have a peaceful life with his friends and family. That was what he really wanted, not to be spending every night thinking like the monster he had fought so hard against becoming.
Another line, another thought and Remus sighed heavily before hearing Dora call his name.
A distraction was exactly what he needed right now as he dropped the quill onto the parchment and pushed himself out of the chair. “Coming Dora.” He called back, stretching and making his way towards the door.
“What is it Love?”
He'd almost ran into his wife as he had moved into the passage, noting that she was coming towards him, her hair darker than usual. Come to think about it she had been far less talkative at dinner, although Remus had simply assumed that that was because she was being worn out by the war, the very reason that he was nervous as well... even with all the enchantments on the house.
Looking at Dora expectantly Remus' eyes narrowed ever so slightly, trying to figure out what it was that she had called him for. “You wanted something?” She stuttered, causing him to frown. Dora was clumsy, yes, but never once had he thought she would stutter... it wasn't something he knew her for. “You realize you can tell me anything right Love?” Taking her hand and leading her into the lounge Remus sat down on the couch, looking her straight in the eyes. What was she trying to say anyway? The muscles in the back of his neck tensed as he watched his wife. There were a number of things that she could be trying to tell him with the war going on. He just didn't know which terrible scenario to ponder first.
Almost running into Remus on his way out of the study had caused Dora to smile for a moment, taking in the sight of her husband who, even under the stress placed on both of them, looked handsome in her eyes. The thought vanished however as he asked her what she had called him for and the smile on her face faded.
This was going to change everything... causing her to remain silent as she stared at him for a beat longer, prompting his question. “I did. I-I wanted to... to tell you something.” She managed to get out, his frown not going unnoticed as she swallowed uncomfortably and nodded at his words. “I realize that Remus.” That was better. The words were coming out more confidently now, and at the touch of his hand on her's Dora felt herself relaxing slightly, following him to the living room.
Sinking onto the couch Dora took a deep breath.
“I took a test today.” It was too simple. From the look on Remus' face this was not what he was expecting and he clearly had no idea how it was that he was meant to respond. Clearing her throat, words cut off by the look on his face Dora sighed slightly.
“Did you get a good result?”
The question asked was in such a quiet and serious manner that Dora almost laughed. It was the obvious and it most definitely relaxed the tension that she was feeling, even as she shook her head. “It wasn't that kind of test Remus.” She murmured, her voice becoming even softer as the strain built on it. “It was a potion. A pregnancy test.” Almost at once a guarded look came over Remus' face. She could see it in his eyes as she pushed forward.
“It was positive.” He was a smart enough man to know what it meant after all, yet she pressed on, having found the courage and refusing to let it go until the next words had slipped from her mouth.
All her talk about a test had him looking at her oddly. A test really didn't seem that worrying after all and Remus had no idea what had made it that she was drawing this out. Unless it was a test that related to the coming war he didn't really feel the need to be all that worried.
“Did you get a good result?” He asked, having cleared his throat, Remus watched as Dora seemed to relax slightly before shaking her head. Not that kind of test. Well now that had him completely confused as he watched his wife push forward. The walls were up at the very mention of the word pregnancy, he could feel it, and Remus hated the nagging feeling that was suddenly building in his stomach. The feeling that was justified the moment the two little words left her mouth.
His mouth opened and closed, making him feel somewhat like a goldfish, before he found the words he had desperately been searching for.
Pregnant. She was pregnant... in the middle of the war and by him no less. A werewolf. “What if the baby is like me?” Remus couldn't help blurting out as he stared at Dora for a long moment. “I'm dangerous Dora! This is just another reason why we shouldn't be together. I'm dangerous to you and now I'm going to be dangerous to a baby too!” He couldn't deal with this. His brain was already fried by all the work he'd been doing and now he had to consider the safety of a baby as well. “I... You... I...” He spluttered, his words finally lost to him before he looked straight back at his wife. “I need a moment.” Getting up from the couch Remus moved swiftly across the room, back down the passage and towards the study.
He needed time.
Closing the door he paced around the floor, trying his best not to draw his wand to shoot spells at inanimate objects. He was going to become a father and Remus hardly knew what to do with that piece of information. This was bad... this was very, very bad. What if the child was a werewolf? Or got bitten by one? Merlin forbid he ever lose control and bite the child himself... This was just not good at all.
Remus drew in a shaky breath, hearing the door open slowly behind him before whirling around. “I don't see how we are going to cope with this.” He blurted out harshly, recoiling at the shade of red his wife's hair was suddenly blazing. “I just... don't see.” He was allowed to worry wasn't he? This was just the kind of thing that was not a good idea.
Remus had looked like somebody had punched him, managing only two words. “You're what?”. Clearly not good as he started immediately on something she hadn't even thought about yet. What if the baby was a werewolf?
“Good question. I don't have any idea what would happen then but you're not any more dangerous just because there's a baby involved.” She muttered, watching as he spluttered before getting up and leaving the room as quickly as possible. Wonderful. Absolutely freaking wonderful. Now she was going to have to have that talk that she had actually been dreading. Opening the door quietly, Dora's gaze landed on her husband, trying not to gape at the words that had come out of his mouth.
“Remus John Lupin.” She scolded, with a tone of voice that matched her fire red hair and sudden Molly Weasley demeanour. “We will cope with this. Your condition should not change the fact that we can have children if that's what we want. And I'm pregnant Remus.” It was almost like she had lost all the nerves that had plagued her earlier, glaring at her husband had seen to that. Shaking her head at the man the woman's hair cooled down at the look he gave her. Stepping forward Dora wrapped her arms around Remus, sighing into his chest. “We can do this...”
He might not believe it now... Dora didn't know. But if she didn't say it, if she didn't believe it then Merlin knew she was not going to be anything less than the mess of nerves and emotions that she had been all evening. And that was not how she wanted to see this going.
His eyes widened as he watched Dora raging in a way that had him certain that she had been spending too much time around Molly. Swallowing hard before drawing another deep breath Remus nodded. “You're pregnant.” His thoughts were still raging but as she stepped forward and wrapped her arms around him Remus realized that the last person he could be negative about this to was Dora.
He couldn't expect her to deal with the war, being pregnant and his negativity, even as he wrapped his arms around her as well. This was their future. They were going to have a child and no matter what now was the time to at least be there for her.
“We can do this.” He repeated, even more softly, completely sure that they could not. Maybe she should go and stay with her mother for now. It would certainly be safer than she was here, although the thought of saying that to the woman who had just ranted at him was not one he was going to follow through on. There would be time to discuss this as he sighed, brushing his lips against her hair – which had now returned to a more usual bubblegum pink – before moving back slightly. “You should go sleep. I'll be up in a little while.”
Just because he had said that they could do this didn't mean that he didn't have things to think about and work on after all. There couldn't be a better time.