Chapter 5 : On Honesty, Trains, and Pretty-Darn-Obvious Crushes (and James)
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who else? nala@TDA
Chapter 5: On Honesty, Trains, and Pretty-Darn-Obvious Crushes (and James)
Hello you foul UNICORN.
Now that I’ve insulted you, I can get on with the next order of business: how awkward things have been between James and me since he confessed to me his American-born acts of manwhoreness.
I know what you’re thinking. You’re thinking, this Lemon chick has overreaction issues. James has been her best friend since FOREVER. There can’t be any awkwardness between them! She’s making it all up in her janked head, that little loopy loopster is.
These assumptions are false.
What? You don’t believe me? Well, despite the fact that you are a disgustingly optimistic rainbow-colored creature of satanic joy, I will prove myself using a detailed list.
Examples of How Things Have Been Unusual as Far as James Potter is concerned:
1. He hasn’t been sitting next to me at dinner.
2. He packs his broomstick up after Quidditch and doesn’t let me ride it.
3. …everything I say comes out really perverted.
4. He’s been “accidentally falling asleep” in Albus’s room/the living room/the guest bedroom instead of sleeping with me like always.
5. …when I said sleeping with me, I didn’t mean it the way it sounded.
Okay just stop it Lemon.
ARGH! Honestly! I can’t take it anymore. I get that he slept with someone! I get that he told me without really meaning to! And I get that my reaction wasn’t what he expected (although I really was totally calm about it, I don’t know WHAT he wanted me to do)! Can’t he just forget about it and be my best friend again?
It’s like this one thing he’s done is somehow creating this fissure between us. Like we’re not just best friends. As if there’s this…sexual boy-girl aspect to James and Lemon. For Voldy’s sake, what does he think? That I’m afraid he’ll get me drunk and sleep with me too?
…Oh my UNICORN, that’s exactly what he thinks isn’t it?
We’re sitting around the fireplace etcetera etcetera. James is being a sodding wanker, sitting across the room next to Lily, very carefully avoiding my eyes. ‘Cause you know, if he looks at me, I might think he’s implying that he wants to shag me. Eye roll.
Ouch. I can’t believe he’s sitting next to Lily, of all the people. I feel terribly negated in my value to him. At least replace me with someone worthy of the position.
Harry and Gin-Gin are talking about something or the other. Gin-Gin’s being offered her position at Holyhead Harpies again I think. Everyone except her wants her to take it – it means better seats at Quidditch games. Not that they need it. Harry gets the best, since he killed the most evil wizard of all time and all. I don’t know what James thinks of this situation though, since he refuses to speak in my presence.
“Er, Lemon? Is everything okay?” I heard Gin-Gin’s voice cutting through the Quidditch conversation (and awkward silence between just James and I).
I stopped my eyes mid-roll and coughed. “Uh, yeah everything is A-okay.” I purposefully turned to James and stared at him with my eyebrow raised. “RIGHT, JAMES?”
James sighed and finally, FINALLY looked at me (sing praises to the wise Rowena!). “Yes, Lemon. Everything is fine.”
“Is it A-OKAY though?” I widened my eyes at him, not blinking.
James gritted his teeth. “I’m assuming so.”
I glared at him. “Assumptions aren’t the truth now are they?”
“No, I suppose they aren’t,” James suddenly smirked at me. I was slightly taken aback at the smirk, since I thought I was winning this argument. Stupid James. “I think we should discuss this outside, don’t you?”
“Erm,” I said, slightly wrong-footed. “Yes, I’m assuming we should.”
Neither of us got up.
Harry cleared his throat. “James and Lemon, I think you two should go out and discuss…whatever on earth you two are talking about.”
James grinned. “Splendid idea, Dad.”
So we’re outside now. We’re supposed to be discussing…something. I kind of lost track of the conversation after James smirked at me. That generally happens when I think I’m on top, but then it turns out he’s on top.
It’s really nice outside though, regardless of the strange silence that’s hanging between us now. It’s all sparkly stars and cool breeze and all that romantic jazz. Nice weather for when I’m with Sex-on-Legs Louis. Not when I’m about to confront James about his behavior.
Sigh. Let’s do this thing.
“So, hi,” I started to say in an unnaturally high voice when James put his hand on my mouth and pushed me against the wall.
Erm okay this isn’t strange at ALL.
“Hi.” James whispered with laughter in his voice. “Did you miss me?”
I nodded, struck dumb by his hand against my lips. I was getting kind of uncomfortable in this position (erm). I should mime “LET ME GO NOW YOU DIRTY MANWHORE!” but somehow I don’t think this would help the situation very much.
James sighed and looked at me. He wasn’t laughing at me anymore. He just stared at me. His eyes are so nice. They look like caramel – like the kind that’s inside a Hershey’s kiss.
I stared right back. Unfortunately my eyes aren’t all that great so I’ll just go right on with what happened next.
“Hey,” James whispered. “I’m not going to get you drunk and sleep with you.”
I noticed suddenly that my mouth was free again. I suddenly felt like laughing.
“Hey,” I grinned instead, “I never thought you were going to.”
James grinned back. “So…we’re cool?”
I rolled my eyes at his American slang. “If you promise to forget about your orange candy that I ate.”
So there you have it UNICORN. James and I are friends again. It’s strange though, I’ve never had such a weird moment with James before. Okay I have, but none where I’ve been so unsure. Okay, I’m usually unsure, but not to that DEGREE.
Ugh I am so SICK of talking about James. Let’s talk about…Louis.
I get to see him tomorrow! Oh yes! It’s September the FIRST and you know what that means! Hogwarts! And a really long train ride with all the Potter-Weasleys – including Mr. Sex-on-Legs himself.
Okay Mr. doesn’t really work with that nickname. I wanted to try it out, but it’s not right. Anyway who cares, I get to see his bluest bluey blue eyes! I’m very excited. I wish I had a good girl friend to help me pick out an outfit for tomorrow. Yeah I suppose that doesn’t really matter since we have to change into our robes for a lot of the ride, but still. First impressions matter. Well actually I hope not – because my first impression on Louis this year wasn’t exactly what I wanted it to be.
But tomorrow, I will change all of that. I will be a mature, poised, charming and groomed woman – as opposed to the shell-shocked, clumsy, blubbering and confused girl-child he met. I will make him stare at me in wonder, gaze at my brilliant persona, and pine for me. He shall ache for my love and it won’t be long before we’re riding our Thestral off into the sunset.
Ugh, this is going to involve a LOT of Sleakeasy’s Hair Potion.
V-necked purple sweater for optimum cleavage-osity? Check.
Sparkly black skirt for flirtiness but not tartiness? Check.
Ballet flats for that dash of cuteness? Check.
Straightened brown-reddish hair with fringe, for no reason other than that’s just how my hair is? Check.
Damn, this is like a PROCESS.
Time for make-up. I can’t decide whether to go for sparkly or subtle? I think subtle. I read somewhere that guys don’t like kissing girls that are made-up too much. Plus I think sparkles might make my look a little too innocent and I really want Louis to know that I’m not all that innocent.
There are, in fact, certain things I want to experience with that boy that involve being the exact opposite of innocent.
Okay make-up’s all done! Alright I sense Gin-Gin will be yelling up the stairs for us to “just get the hell down already! It’s not like you don’t know you have school today? Merlin, Harry, your children are the laziest lot of adolescents...”
“James, wake up! Your mother is about to go legally insane.” I prodded my snoring best friend, trying to get him a little alert before Ginny descended upon us. No response. Story of my life.
“COME ON, James!” I exclaimed, annoyed. Gingerly smoothing out my skirt, I kneeled down next to him and began tugging at his hair. “Wake up, wake up,” I mumbled robotically, too busy making sure my skirt didn’t rip to actually focus. It’s not that it’s tight…it’s just fitted.
Oh shut up.
James was NOT waking up. Good thing his stuff is packed because Ginevra Molly Weasley Potter is going to FUH-LIP when she sees him lying shirtless and drooling on the floor. I tugged at his arm again.
“James, as master of the universe, I command you to wake up this instant-”
Okay now James has grabbed my hand. No James, I’m not being lovey-dovey, I’m trying to get you to wake up.
Oh great I hear Ginny approaching.
1. gently slide my hand out of James’ grip,
2. and grab my things,
3. and check my reflection in the mirror,
4. and do a little pirouette even though my skirt doesn’t poof around me,
5. and smile to check for any unsightly spots on my teeth ,
6. and quietly slip away behind Ginny as she walks in James’s room, fuming.
I’m a terrible best friend.
“You’re a terrible best friend,” James muttered to me as we piled into the Harry’s car. His hair was gelled flat to his head and he was wearing his glasses. I’m guessing Ginny had punished him for being the last Potter asleep by bringing out James’s nerd look.
If James had his nerd look on the night of that party in America, he’d still be a virgin.
“I’m sorry James,” I murmured, discretely tousling his hair. “I had to escape. But hey,” I grinned, holding out my hand, “guess what I got you?”
James looked at my hand at smiled. “One last piece of orange candy.”
“I haven’t forgotten you see.”
“You’re an amazing best friend. Except I wish you had my contact lenses instead.”
After that fun little exchange the drive to King’s Cross was pretty darn uneventful, except for when Lily eyed my skirt and kept asking if I had a boy I was trying to “hook.” You know it’s sad when Lily understands my motives – and approves of them.
Thankfully I managed to ward off all questions by pretending like I thought Nargles were real.
We’re all parked up at the station and waiting for the many Weasleys to join us. Lily is pouring glitter on her face, and it ain’t looking very attractive. I’m so glad I went with subtle.
I’m a little nervous that I’ll make a fool of myself in front of Louis again, and James isn’t helping. He’s figured out why I’m all dressed up and keeping taunting me about my “intentions.” Well, that and he gets all huffy about how I’m “making myself attractive for some stupid boy,” which I take offense to, because I am doing this for my own SOUL.
I believe that having Louis snog me will be very nurturing for my soul.
Anyway, James is implying that I’m not already attractive, which is very hurtful, so I’m not speaking to him. For now.
Oooooooooooooh, I see them. There’s Ron and Hermione, bickering, with Rose and Hugo rolling their eyes at their parents antics. Well Hugo is anyway. Rose is reading. Merlin, that girl.
“You know I think it’s really odd that you have a crush on Louis,” James commented in a snarky voice. He was standing next to me, with his back against the Potters’ car, his arms folded in annoyance. “It’s the same as having a crush on Freddie. Do you realize that?”
We’re ignoring James. There’s James’s mental aunt Audrey right behind the Granger-Weasleys. She’s glowering at Lucy for some reason or the other, while Mother Molly looks on in complete approval as she is the Supreme Ruler of the Act of Scolding.
“In fact it’s worse because he’s older,” James continued, despite the fact that I hadn’t answered. “And he looks like a Veela. Wait, he IS part Veela.”
Roxy is looking all upset as she stares up at Freddie. She doesn’t like going back to school since her brother becomes too involved with his other friends to really pay attention to her much. Poor thing.
“I understand my recent sexual escapade has left you feeling lonely, but you don’t need to compensate by chasing after my effeminate cousin.”
Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrr, where is Louis? Isn’t that all of the sodden family? Wait does James’s Uncle Charlie have kids? No, I don’t think he does. Okay the Delacour’s should be showing up anytime soon. Oh there they are! Well I see Victoire and Teddy anyway. Hm Teddy is so cute, I don’t blame Lily for lusting after him.
Dom isn’t there, she’s probably working. Grrrrrr where is Louis?
Just great, I go to all these lengths to look attractive for this loon, and turns out he’s dropped out of school to become a pimp. Just perfect.
“I mean honestly Lemon, you’re deserve so much better than Louis. He’s BLONDE. You deserve a more solid character for a boyfriend. Someone with luxurious black hair that has a tendency to get very messy – “
“THERE HE IS!” I screeched, cutting James off in the middle of his tirade. And effectively causing his entire family to turn around and look at me inquiringly.
“Erm, I thought I saw Waldo,” I offered as explanation to the watching crowd, flushing red. Then I remembered that looking red wasn’t part of the “be calm, cool, composed” plan to get Louis, so I fanned my face quickly.
Who cares if the clan thinks I’m crazy? I had spotted Louis! Oh and he looked so gorgeous that I might just faint.
“You are irrepressible, Snickets,” James glared at me and stalked off in a huff. What’s his problem?
Oh I’ll worry about that later. Louis has seen me! And he’s waving! Okay what should I do? Wave back? Or smile? He won’t see the smile, he’s a little distance away. Oh what the hell, I’ll just wave. Wave!
Oh now he’s smiling! Should I just stand here and wait for him to reach me? Oh god what do I do, what do I do?
I sound like Lily. I’m so ashamed of myself.
Oh help, he’s here, he’s HERE –
“Hi,” Sex-on-Legs Louis smiled at me, his bluest bluey blue eyes looking even…bluer in the sunlight.
“Hi,” I breathed, smiling so wide, my jaw started hurting a little bit.
He didn’t say anything else. He just kept smiling.
Ohmygodohmygodohmygodohmygod, he is SO CUTE. And I am SO NERVOUS.
“Do you want to walk to the train together?” he asked, still smiling. “It’s almost eleven, and we won’t get a compartment.”
“You had me at ‘together’,” I blurted out. Louis blinked. “I mean, ‘train,’ you had me at ‘train’!” Shoot me now.
He grinned. “Let’s get going then.”
Phew, he didn’t make a big deal out of my spazzy error. Calm yourself Lemon, you’re not being poised and collected at all. In fact you are grinning quite demonically.
Okay. Time out from being crazy. He’s just another human being, although very gorgeous and probably owner of even hotter abs than my best friend.
Oh gosh, everyone’s watching us walk toward the train. Well okay they’re watching Louis. I should have known I wouldn’t be the only one to notice his post-summer-Scorpius-Malfoy-like looks. In fact I see many girls already twirling their curly curls with evil glints in their eyes….grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr.
That was my ferocious Keep-Your-Filthy-Fingers-Off-Louis growl. I like to think it would be incredibly threatening when emitted…not in my head.
Louis seems to be impervious to the staring. He is a such a gentleman! He took my hand while we walked through the barrier to help me get through it.
Well I didn’t really need help; all you have to do is walk through it. But it’s the thought that counts right? It was very chivalrous. Goodness knows I don’t get any more chivalry than being called “young lady” from the only other men in my life (the Potters).
“You’ll be joining the Wotter compartment right?” Louis asked as we waded through the crowd of waving parents and their excited children. He was still holding my hand so we wouldn’t lose each other.
“Oh! Yes,” I smiled, normally, at him.
“Good,” he smiled back, turning his blue-eyed charm fully on. I got the full blast of the blueness and I swear I went a little dizzy for the moment there.
We fell back in silence after that. He was still holding my hand and I was trying very hard not to let him notice how much I was noticing that fact. After what felt like centuries, we reached the train (no I wasn’t sensing everything in a romantic slow motion manner, there’s just a LOT of people to fight through to the train). Louis climbed up to it and pulled my up behind him.
I had a slight feeling that I had lost my trunk, but frankly I didn’t care very much.
The Wotter compartment was almost reserved for the family plus me every year. Obviously no one dared intrude upon the chosen seating of the descendants of the “Golden Trio.” By extension the rest of us got guaranteed seats as well.
When Louis and I walked in, the entire family was already seated and chattering. This basically meant that there were no seats left. Which would involve sitting on the floor. Which would be very hard in this skirt I’m wearing.
Yes, it’s tight. Sod off.
“Oi,” Louis prodded Freddie, who was lounging comfortably by the window. “Let Lemon sit here.”
And would you look at that. Freddie moved. Looking very confused I might add.
In fact the majority of the family – okay everyone except James looked extremely puzzled by Louis’s sudden interest in my comfort. My best friend was simply glaring at the window, his head turned resolutely away from Louis.
Oh and Lily looked highly disapproving of that fact that the boy I was trying to “hook” was her own cousin.
He really needs to get over himself, that one. And SHE…I don’t even care what she thinks.
Anyway, Louis sat beside me. We weren’t holding hands anymore, what with the prying eyes that watched our every move, but every now and then his fingers would brush against mine and I felt all tingly and strange.
I’m pretty sure my face was turning pink.
I am pink lemonade.
(A/N: I'm literally the WORST WORST WORST writer ever! I'm so SORRY about this failure of an update! GRRRR. Well hopefully for you Louis/Lemon shippers, this will keep you going till the next update (WHICH WILL BE MUCH SOONER I PROMISE I PROMISE DON'T THROW ROCKS AT ME PLEASE GOSH) and for all you James/Lemon shippers, I hope the little pushing against the wall action will keep you from hating this chapter too much? Heh heh. OK i'm done now. Please review though, I love hearing how much you all love this fic. ;) Tee hee. )
EDIT: I'm BACK! And working on Chapter 6. So bear with me please.
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