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Enemies with Benefits by dobbyismyhero22
Chapter 6 : Lies and Found Out
Rating: MatureChapter Reviews: 63

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holy awesome chapter image by dream_BIG 


You know when you go through those times in your life where you change your mind about something huge, and then the thing that you changed your mind about blows it all to hell?




Well, let me give you an example.


Say that you’ve hated someone pretty much your entire life…let’s call him…Weasley. Well, you decide that maybe this Weasley person actually isn’t the spawn of the devil! I know, shocking right?! But then Weasley does something incredibly stupid that makes you dream of murdering him in his sleep. What could this stupid thing be, you ask?


Hmm…how about telling the whole school that you’re…expecting.


Expecting a baby.




I’m sorry that I don’t want the entire school to think that I’m some kind of whore that is going to pop out a little nugget in a few months.


Okay, my best friend is pregnant so I can’t really say anything, but still!


How could he fucking do this?


He bloody knows I’m not pregnant, and yet he had to go spread the rumor just to be a complete and utter jackarse.


And the worst part?


People believe him.


I’ve already had people call me a slag when I walked into the Great Hall, and some little munchkin 1st year asked me if she could feel my tummy.


No, you cannot bloody feel my tummy! I don’t want to get stomach rapped by some dwarf that I don’t even know!




I didn’t even know what these people were referring to until my lovely baby brother came marching up to Roxy, Sydney, Heidi, and me in the common room while studying, and screamed, “Who the hell knocked you up? How could you be so irresponsible? Use some bloody protection next time! Have you ever heard of a condom or birth control?!”


It was a very pleasant experience to be with the mother of his bloody baby while he yelled this.




Me? Irresponsible? Maybe you should check the ultrasound of those that you’ve shagged recently, Toshie.


“What are you talking about?” I asked, completely confused, glancing at Heidi. She was staring at her lap, trying to hid a grin.


Well, I’m glad that she finds this situation amusing.


“Fred said that some bloke got you pregnant!” He yelled, drawing the attention of the entire common room.


Perfect. Just bloody perfect.


Cue: Eye twitching and extreme rage.


“Excuse me for a moment.” I said sweetly as I stood up, threw my Transfiguration book to the ground roughly, and stomped to the boy’s staircase.


“Who did you have sex with!?” Tosh screamed behind me, but I ignored him.


I threw open the door that said 7th Year, and shrieked, “WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU?!”


James said, “Here we go,” with a grin, Logan started laughing, and bloody fucking Weasley was wearing an amused smirk.


“Wrong with me?” Weasley said with mock confusion as he got off of his bed. I almost gasped when I realized that he wasn’t wearing a shirt, but I quickly recovered when I reminded myself of what an arsehole he was. “I believe that you’re the one with a child in her uterus.”


I swear to Merlin that if looks could kill then Weasley would currently be lying somewhere deep in the ground getting eaten by worms.


I’d be a lot happier if he was there.


My grip tightened on my wand, and I shot a hex at him, which he quickly dodged. My rage increased, and I continued to throw hexes, insults, and jinxes at him, which he either dodged or blocked once Logan threw him his own wand.


You see, this is why Defense is my least favorite class.


I fucking suck at it.


“Stupefy!” I screamed, and I actually thought I might have succeeded in stunning him, but unfortunately the bastard blocked it at the last possible second.


The power of his shield charm sent me flying a few feet backwards, and forced me to land on my arse.


I got back up and was about to send another hex towards him, but he disarmed me. He easily caught my wand and smirked obnoxiously. “Ah, ah, ah,” He said in a disapproving voice, “We can’t have you dueling in your state. It might hurt the baby.”


I growled/screamed in frustration and lunged for his face, but I was unfortunately thrown backwards before I could. “What the hell?” I yelled at James when I realized that he was the one that cast the shield charm this time rather than Weasley.


“Sorry love, but bros before hoes.” James grinned, and he, Weasley, and Logan all raised a fist up in the air looking incredibly stupid.


I scowled at the fact that I was just called a ho by my closest guy friend, but because he is my closest guy friend, I decided to ignore it.


“Why the fuck would you tell Tosh, and no doubt tons of other people, that I’m bloody pregnant?” I demanded angrily after marching towards Weasley to stand directly in front of him. Although I was a half of a foot shorter than him, I hoped that I managed to look somewhat scary.


His smirk told me that I probably wasn’t succeeding.




“I thought it would make for an interesting afternoon.” He answered completely amused with a nonchalant shrug.


More like he thought it would make for a good snog because we normally end up having great snogs after a row.


Well, not this time. Stupid tosser.


“Having your baby brother scream at you to ‘use protection’ does not make for an interesting afternoon in my book. Frankly, it’s actually a bit awkward.” I growled, and the three blokes burst out in hysterical laughter.




“Ah, I wish I could’ve seen your face!” Logan chortled, and clutched his stomach from laughing to hard.


“It’s not funny!” I exclaimed, and stomped my foot like some immature, prissy girl that you see on bad muggle television shows.


“Au contraire, it’s actually hilarious.” James grinned.


Au contraire? Where did the sudden burst of French come from? What is he? Pepé Le Pew?


“Just give me back my wand so I can get the fuck out of here.” I ordered and held out my hand.


Weasley stopped his insane and annoying laughter and paused before simply saying, “No.”


“You’re going to steal my wand?” I asked, raising an eyebrow and putting a hand on my hip.


“I’ll give it back to you…later.” Weasley said, emphasizing the ‘later’ portion.


‘Later’ being when we planned to meet up to snog before he decided to be a stupid fuck.


Then he winked.


Nice. Really subtle.


Bloody git.


“Actually, I am not planning on seeing you later so why don’t you just give me the damn wand now?” I snapped.


He looked confused as to why I wasn’t going to snog his bloody face off tonight.




James and Logan just looked plain confused.


“Why not?” Weasley frowned.


I slapped my palm to my head in frustration and annoyance. “Because I don’t want to disrupt the child that’s apparently residing in my bloody uterus!” I exclaimed with wild and angry eyes, and stormed out of the room.


Who gives a rat’s arse about my wand? I mean it’s not like I need it for classes tomorrow or anything…Shit.


Knowing Weasley, he’ll still show up in the Transfiguration room like we earlier planned, hoping for some action.


But will I give it to him? No. I’ll simply snatch the wand, and be on my way.


Willpower, Dessie, WILLPOWER!


I’ve said it once and I’ll say it again: I always win when it comes to Weasley.


…Well, unless we’re dueling cause then he kicks my arse, but that’s beside the bloody point.






“Roxanne Molly Weasley, I regret to inform you of this but, I thoroughly and completely detest your twin brother.” I said seriously as I entered our dormitory.


Heidi smirked and Sydney grinned while Roxanne sighed and said, “I would say that I hope you didn’t hex him too badly, but considering the fact that you are truly awful at Defense, and he’s pretty much a beast at it, I guess I don’t have to worry about it.”


I scowled at how right she was.


It’s annoying when you get to the point in a friendship when they can pretty much predict your life. Well, to be honest, it’s a little more scary than annoying.


One time, Sydney and I literally had a conversation, but she was saying all the things I was about to say and vice versa.


It was pretty frightening, and I swear to Merlin that I almost went to Minnie because I thought Syd somehow buried herself in my head.


“Shut up,” I muttered, and plopped myself down on Roxy’s bed where they were all painting their toenails.


Heidi went with a bright fire truck red, Sydney did a soft and subtle pink, and Roxy chose an obnoxious lime green.


It described their personalities so bloody well.


“Davies cornered me after dinner and demanded to know whether or not you were pregnant.” Sydney said, looking at me with an amused smile playing on her lips.


I stared at her for about three point five seconds before cracking up at the image of my ex boyfriend asking such a question.


“Probably thought he was going to be the father even though we never even shagged.” I choked out between laughs.


“He never really was the sharpest crayon in the box,” Roxy smirked, and then swore after her bottle of nail polish tipped over and spilled on her bed.


“I honestly don’t know how that bloke ever got into Ravenclaw,” Heidi said.


“He once, dead seriously, asked me if girls poop.” I remembered and we all burst into giggles and more laughter.


“What did you tell him?”


And evil grin formed on my face. “That we actually poop rainbows and fart out butterflies.” More laughter.


But for real, when I told the ‘smart’ Adam Davies this, I honestly think for a split second that he believed me.


I feel like if he and Weasley went into a Who is the bigger dumb fuck? contest, then it would be an extremely interesting event.


“Boys are idiots.” Roxy said. “I can’t believe that Tosh actually believed that you were pregnant.”


Personally, I don’t know why Roxy is surprised about this. Tosh probably takes the cake for one of the biggest idiots that I know…After Weasley and Davies, that is.


“Yeah, and some load of help that you were Heidi!” I said, narrowing my hazel eyes, even though I wasn’t really that mad, at the blonde that looked up indignantly from her feet.


“What did you want me to do? Say, ‘No, Tosh. It’s not your sister that’s pregnant! It’s actually me with your bloody child! Do you want a sweet, little girl or a bouncing baby boy?’” Heidi exclaimed. “Yeah, cause I’m sure that would go over well!” She added sarcastically.


Damn, I hate it when she’s right.


“Well, you are going to have to tell him eventually.” Sydney pointed out.


“And James and Logan, your parents, your professors, Mr. McCarthy…”


“Don’t forget Landon!” I added brightly, and Heidi glared at me.


I just smiled obnoxiously like the helpful best friend that I am.


“I don’t plan on telling any of them until I absolutely need to. I mean, I’m about two months now, and women start showing at…what? Six months?” Heidi guessed.


“Four months.” Sydney corrected. “Sometimes three.”


Heidi’s eyes widened as she realized that she wouldn’t be able to fit into her favorite jeans in just a few weeks.


“Ssshhhiiittt.” She whined, brought her knees to her chest, and hugged them.


She looked pretty pathetic so I let the perverted part of my mind take control and said, “Well, look at the bright side! This means that you can have Mr. McCarthy’s hands all over your stomach!”


Her face broke into a smile and she said, “That could be fun.”


Lucky bitch.






You can to this, Dessie. You can do this. Just don’t think about his abs, or his lips, or his chest, or his body in general…


I find that in most cases, talking to yourself really does help, but not in this particular instance because now I can only bloody think about what Weasley looks like without a shirt on.


It also doesn’t help that we haven’t snogged in over week, and all I could think about was his lips on mine…


Fuck my life.


I sighed and walked into the Transfiguration classroom.


He, of course, was already there, and smirked like an arrogant moron when he saw me. “I knew that you’d show up.”







I smirked at her conflicted expression as I closed the distance between us, grabbed her by the waist, and pulled her to me. I leaned in to finally snog her after the longest week of my life, but she turned her head so I nearly missed her bloody ear.


I frowned when I saw that she looked pissed off. She couldn’t still be mad at me for telling people that she’s preggers, right? I mean, that happened like…six hours ago? She should be over it by now!


See, this is what I hate about birds. They hold grudges longer than Grandpa Weasley will talk to you about muggle rubber ducks. And that’s a long fucking time.


If this same exact situation happened with James then I guarantee that we’d be golden right now. He’d probably be pissed for about five minutes, punch me, and then we’d be back to having a jolly good time.


Then again, I don’t know why I’d tell the whole school that James is pregnant because I think that would be a bit less believable, and I don’t want to snog James’ face off like I want to do to Blazer’s…Okay, bad example.


Either way, girls are annoying despite the fact that they have nice boobs and are good cooks, and we’d all be happier without them.


Who am I kidding? I could never live without boobs…and my mommy. (Yeah, I’m a momma’s boy, get over it.)


“I just came to get my wand.” Blazer said in a determined voice. She was attempting to look me in the eyes, but she was failing miserably, and kept staring at my mouth.


“Is that all you came for?” I asked and backed her up against the wall, placing my hands on the stone on either side of her head.


She took a few seconds before she answered, “Yes,” And I felt myself smirking again at the way her voice quivered.


This was seriously way too easy.


“Are you sure?” I asked, my voice low and husky, and I leaned down to kiss her neck. “Mmm,” She murmured, and lifted up her head to give me better access.


Too, too easy.


My hands found their way up her shirt, and I touched the soft skin on her stomach and lower back.


I swear there is absolutely nothing better than soft skin. Nothing. Not even chocolate cake, and that’s saying something.


After I unbuttoned her white shirt and threw it to the side was when Blazer decided to throw her morals to hell I think. Why do I think this? Because she grabbed my face, that was currently busy giving her a hickey on her neck that I’m sure she’d kill me for in the morning, and pulled it to her mouth, and just began snogging the hell out of me.


This girl has a lower willpower than an alcoholic being put in a room full of firewhiskey.


…Not that I’m complaining. I always win when it comes to Blazer.


I responded instantly, and she got to work unbuttoning my own shirt. When she was done, she immediately placed her hands on my abs and I shivered in pleasure while she moaned from me running my hands underneath her skirt and rubbing her inner thigh.


I was so caught up in the snog that I didn’t even hear the door open. In fact, I didn’t even know that my best friend/cousin was in our presence until he yelled, “HOLY FUCK!”







A/N: Ah?! Sorry about that small cliffy, but isn’t it exciting that they were found out by the first person? Yes? No? Did you like more of Fred’s POV? I like writing him, and I don’t at the same time because it’s nice to have a change of pace, but at the same time I feel like I’m not very good at trying to sound manly and a man.


And I’m also really bad at snogging scenes, which come to think of it, means that I was really stupid to write this story considering the fact that there are so many, but I felt like the one in this chapter was especially raunchy for some reason…hmm. Well, I hope you all like the chapter! Leave a review to let me know your favorite part! (: 

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