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Screw Loose by Spaz
Chapter 1 : The Voice in My Brain
Rating: MatureChapter Reviews: 2

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Off to Hogwarts.

Textbooks, check.

Make up and hair products,check.

Quills, check.

Notebook with notes on everything I know about the Marauders, double check.

"Oh my, merlin, Peter Pettigrew looked at me!" I whispered excitedly to my bestfriend Kayleigh Colette.

Hey, I'm Joeye Colhono. Fifth year at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, and flaming schitzo. I've always known I was different from everyone else, I mean there's a freakin' voice in my brain telling me what to do, that's not exactly normal, is it? Yeah, didn't think so. I was diagnosed with schizophrenia the summer going into my third year of Hogwarts. I had a mental break down one morning, someone drank all the orange juice, and I lost it.

I was taken to St. Mungo's where the doctors told me I was schitzo. Lucky for me I wasn't locked away, although my parents were all for that (thanks alot mum and dad!) because I have mild schizophrenia. There's only the voice in my brain, I don't have delusions, or hallucinations, not regularly, anyways. So I get to walk around free, and pretend I'm normal like everyone else. That is a hell of alot easier said than done.

Even more lucky for me, Kayleigh didn't ditch me when I told her I was schitzo, if anything it brought us closer together. And she even joined in with my obsession with the Marauders.

Ahh, the Marauders, they had to be the best looking and most popular guys in fifth year, which is why I was so excited that Peter Pettigrew looked at me. He was one fourth of the the Marauders, who were sitting a little further down the table from where Kayleigh and I sat.

Kayleigh gasped and said "Did he really?!" I nodded enthusiastically and said "Yeah, and this time he was actually looking at me, there was no way he was looking at anyone behind me!"

"Nice!" Kayleigh said as I quickly jotted down the way Peter looked at me. Which was with a lost expression, yet interested. I carry my Marauders notebook with me everywhere, so every time they do something I can write it down before I forget.

"He's looking at you," Kayleigh said as I finished writing.

"Who, Peter?!" I ask anxiously.

"Nope, Adam Ross," she said.

"Ugh!" I groaned in disappointment, "Why is he staring at me?"

"You know he's liked you since second year," she reminded me.

"Yes, but how has he not picked up on my disinterest? Doesn't he realize my heart belongs to four other guys?" I said gazing dreamily at the Marauders. Then I looked at Adam,he was quite good looking and lots of girls fancied him. I could definitely see why, too. Not only was he good looking, but he was smart and funny. He noticed me looking and he smiled, I smiled back.

"No! You don't like him, you love the Marauders!" the voice in my brain screamed.

"I know, alright? Leave me alone, gosh!" I didn't realize I had said that out loud until I saw people staring at me like I was mental. I looked down and continued eating. This year, I was not going to be stared at wierdly by people, I refuse to let that happen!

"Hey, Joeye!" A boy's voice called. So much for not being stared at wierdly. I turned around to see who the voice belonged to. It was Thomas Moore,a fifth year Ravenclaw, he was smirking. I could see that a portion of the Ravenclaw table, which included my twin brother, Jesse, and a large portion of the Gryffindor table, which included the Marauders was staring at me. Why did Thomas always do this to me?

"You're looking gorgeous this year," he said loudly making more people stare, "How about going to Hogsmeade with me?" I could kill him! Really, did he have to ask me out infront of half of the Great Hall?!

"Play it cool," the voice in my brain said. I shrugged and said "Maybe, if I'm not busy," I gave him a playful smile before turning around. I heard a soft thud and then Thomas.

"Ouch, what was that for?!" he asked.

"That's my sister!" I heard Jesse say angrily. I hate how over protective he is. It's not even like he's the oldest, I am, by two minutes! But everyone seems to forget that.

Kayleigh hit my arm and whispered, "They're staring at you! The Marauders are staring at you!" Sure enough all of them were staring at me. Oh, my Merlin, they were staring at me!

As I got out my quill and notebook to write down this monumental moment Kayleigh said, "Have they changed over summer?"

I looked up and realized they had. After writing down that they stared at me, I studied them.

First was Peter Pettigrew, the smallest, and least attractive of the four, but I found him quite cute. He had grown a few inches during summer, so he didn't seem so small. Then was Sirius Black, the best looking of them, he had let his long gorgeous hair grow just a little longer. Kayleigh won't admit it, but she has a huge crush on Sirus, I can tell but the way she looked at him. Next was James Potter, the leader and most popular. He had gotten new glasses, I liked them better than his old ones. And lastly, Remus Lupin, the smartest and most mature of them all. He grew out is hair also, but not that much, I'm sure I'd be the only one to notice. For some odd reason, I liked Remus the best, maybe because he was much more mature than the rest.

When they realized I noticed them staring all but Remus looked away, he gave me a polite smile, which I think I returned, but it might have come out as a grimace instead. I quickly looked down.

"Do you always listen to the voice in your brain?" Kayleigh asked suddenly. She barely asked questions when it came to me being schitzo, so this caught me off guard.

"Um, yeah, why?" I said.

"Well, what if it tells you to something bad?"

"It won't, Kayleigh," I assured her. "It hasn't led me wrong yet. You know it's the reason we're friends, it told me to be friends with you. And it's the reason I have the top grades in the year, even better than Miss Perfect Lily Evans."

I don't really like Lily Evans, everyone thought she was the most amazing thing, but I don't. Maybe because James Potter had a huge crush on her.

"And it got me the positions of one of the new prefects with Remus which will help us get closer to the Marauders,"

"That reminds me!" Kayleigh exclaims, "What happened at the prefects meeting?"

I smiled slyly, "I thought you'd never ask."

She gasped, "What happened?!"

"Okay so, Severus is one of the Slytherin prefects. And he was trying to talk to me as though I didn't break up with him. He was saying we should have lunch like we used to!"

"Well, that's not so bad," she said shrugging.

"Lunch like we used to have it consisted of us snogging the whole time! Anyways, I guess Remus noticed he was bothering me and came over and asked if he could talk to me. And guess what, he knew my name!"

"No away!" Kayleigh exclaimed.

"Yes! And then he asked me if I was okay, he's so sweet!" I said looking at him as he chuckled at something Sirius said. I wrote down what he looked liked when he laughed.

His shoulders moved up and down, his mouth barely opened, and his gorgeous eyes sparkled. His eyes were so captivating, they were a greyish-blue color, like a wolf's eyes.

Once the feast was over, Kayleigh and I got up. "Well, I've got to go show the first years around," I told her.

"Okay, make sure to tell me if anything happens with Remus," she whispered.

"Of course," I said turning around and bumping into someone. My notebook on the ground, luckily, I charmed it so only Kayleigh and I could read it. I looked up to see the one the only, James Potter! I involentarily gasped. He bent down to pick up my notebook. He looked at the cover, which had my name on it.

"Sorry, Jo-eye Col-hono," he said.

Okay, it hurt a little that he didn't know my name, but I shook it off.

"Um, actually, it's Joeye, like the boy's name, and my last name is Colhono, the 'h' is silent," I said smiling. Just being in his presense was amazing!

He laughed, which made my heart race in three different kinds of ways, "Sorry, Joeye," he said.

"It's okay, James," I said.

He raised his eyebrows and said "You know my name?"

I laughed too, "Yeah, everyone knows your name," I said making up an excuse. I couldn't tell him the real reason was because I was hoplessly obsessed with him and his best friends, or that his name was carved in my right arm along with his friends.

I know that's a crazy thing to do, but the voice told me to. Sure it was painful as hell and sure I passed out from blood loss and pain between Sirius's and Peter's name, but once I regained conciousness, I kept going until I was done. I touched the spot on my arm where their names were carved.

I looked over at Kayleigh, she was standing near Lily Evans, looking at me excitedly. I smiled at her and winked. Then I noticed Remus looking at me, waiting for me to help him with the first years.

"I-I've got to go," I said breathing heavily, "you know, prefect duties,"

"Well, I'll see you around, Joeye," he said smiling.

"Bye," I squeaked walking away.

"Ready?" Remus asked me when I made it over. I nodded excitedly.
We finally reached the common room. Remus turned to me and said "I take the boys, you take the girls?"

"You're so smart," I said admiringly, smiling like a little girl.

He laughed and led the boys toward their dormitories. I led the girls.

"Okay," I started, "up these stairs lead to your dormitories, all of your things are already up there, make sure you remember the password to this common room, it's Minor Fortuna, it changes in about two weeks or so, okay? And try not to shout the password out so people from other houses can hear, we don't want them sneaking in our common room..."

I managed to hide a smile, I had heard my brother shout the Ravenclaw password to his friends and sometimes I'd sneak in the common room to snog Thomas Moore, sure he was extremely obnoxious, but he was a great kisser.

I was brought back to the present, "So, if you have any questions, feel free to ask me, or Remus," I gestured to him, I watched him tell the first year boys everything.

"Is he your boyfriend?" A little girl asked.

"Um, no…not yet, anyways," I said looking over at him again, he gestured towards me and looked over, he waved at me, I waved back. I needed to hurry up and jot down what he looked like when he was being friendly.

I turned my attention back to the first years, "Remember, my name is Joeye if you have any questions or-oh shit!" I had just realized I didn't have my notebook where I wrote everything I knew about the Marauders. I didn't have it because James Potter did.

Hey, hope you liked it! Review if the voice in your brain tells you, to. Or if you want to do it of your own accord!

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